taken for granted

Philippines
September 30, 2010 11:24pm CST
I have been taken for granted once in a while. Sometimes i don't mind since it is done by someone i love and really close to me. I was so blinded by love that i don't mind him doing it not just once but several times. Until one day I just get tired of it. I can't take it anymore. I tried to talk to him about that but no action taken to correct it. I give him the chance to change but it never came. I only be remembered if he needs something from me. :( Could he blame me if i am ignoring him right now. I don't want to talk to him not even look at his direction. I am fed up and I don't want to taken for granted anymore. Not even a single answer to his messages.
7 responses
@aaronfyzeon (1920)
• Philippines
1 Oct 10
Thank you for this wonderful topic you have shared although it is not as wonderful experience you are having right now. I know how it feels to be taken for granted. I felt that all the time. I always have been a trophy girlfriend from my previous relationships and I am just being really taken cared off during some gatherings wherein I will be introduced with my lover's friends. It is just so natural for us to feel the way you feel right now and retaliate to him. We are just giving them what they deserve. It makes us somehow relieved to see that they are begging for our attention because it seems that they are not even existing on this planet. But for how long will we be able to do this? How much strength do we have to hold on to our pride, ego and self-worth? We all deserve to be happy in our lives too. It is time for you to make some serious actions with your relationship. Not just ignore it because having a relationship with someone we really love and really like is the most happy part of living our lives. Ask your lover where would he want to go with that relationship. You should decide then based on his answer if you will continue it or not. After all, it's all about your happiness. You deserve to have someone better. Ask the help and advices of your friends too. This is really a serious matter in your life. Have a great weekend and I hope the results will all be good.
• Philippines
1 Oct 10
Hi aaron, I dont know how long but i will try not to give in. I have already talk to him about it but i dont get the answers i want. He makes me hanging no specific answer. Sometimes i even got none. That's the reason i started ignoring him and pretended he does not exist. Even now keeps on texting sometimes he would call but i already made up my mind. I just hope I will make it till I will feel better. I wanted him to know that I had enough of his behaviour. Thanks and have great week end too. I will be spending my weekend with my little girl. She's the one that gives me strength to face all this.
• Philippines
1 Oct 10
i understand how that feels, i hate it. i know we go blind when we are inlove but how could they just ignore us and take us for granted. those losers! but how could we just hate and love them at the same time? hmph.. your post reminds me of my then date. i like him a lot, somehow he makes me feel important but most times he also notices me when he wants me. it is depressing, yet i continue to reach for him. however, my bestfriend was already worried about my actions and ordered me to stop or else it is i who'd end up the most loser in the situation. so by then, I stop communicating im although i still think of him most times, and it just pains me whenever i think of him. why cant we have the ones we love? worse yet is, why do we love the people who'd never love us...\ life! life! life! and it's all because of the word L O V E! oh that sucks! :c
1 person likes this
• Philippines
1 Oct 10
That's true bumblebee, even it is my decision to stop talking to him and ignore his messages and calls now but i still think of him. But i also know the moment i give him a chance again i would still suffer the same way. It is better to end it and continue life. :(
• United States
1 Oct 10
Sorry to hear that. I don't blame you at all. A person can only take so much. Maybe this will get his head on straight. Best of luck to you with it.
• United States
1 Oct 10
Sweetie I know this feeling too well, as I have had this problem my whole life and it has to do with how we phrase it, as I always use to say I really do not mind it so much. But truly it is such an ill feeling of not being appreciated and having great worth. It is something I truly despise and unless we put our foot down and demand respect it will continue to happen. When I first met my boyfriend I literally told him that I had a major problem with people taking me for granted and every now and again he needs a reminder as it truly is pretty bothersome. So I like you get so frustrated that I completely shut down and refuse to speak to him. A bit hard for me since we live together. He knows how I get so he truly makes great effort to not do this anymore. Good luck to you honey as if it does not stop it will not improve as time goes by, as long as your boyfriend does not truly recognize that it is a problem.
• Philippines
1 Oct 10
Thanks hardworkinggurl, the difference is that we dont live together but still he makes me feel unimportant not unless he needed something. I told him how I feel about it but it seems nothing changes. He wont even answer my mesages sometimes. That's why I ended the relationship becuase i know it is not getting anywhere. It makes me feel really bad but this the best thing i could do for myself.
@ashbelle (49)
• Philippines
1 Oct 10
Hi Blue, I had a very similar experience and I know it really gets harder everytime you keep him take you for granted. I guess, your talking to him about it was a good start. Though, I wonder what his reason was of doing that to you. If it's not reasonable enough, the best thing to od is to take a cool off. Sometimes they will realize what they were losing when its already gone. I hope that things will be better for you.
• United States
1 Oct 10
No one deserves to be taken for granted I can totally relate it has happened several times to me in my lifetime. Unfortunately people and even family members will do it and it's not right. It's something that I refuse to allow and I've learned to be as careful as possible and if I notice someone trying to take advantage of my kindness or love for whatever reason I immediately take a stand and let them know not to even try. It's sad that we have to be like that but you gotta do what you gotta do cause it ain't right and the pain it causes don't feel good so why deal with it.
@thanks1961 (7035)
• India
1 Oct 10
Hi dear, Everyone is busy with their own problems and not even understands how other do. Here also, you are too much bothered about yourself and not even thinking about him and how he must be feeling. If you get some time to really understand him and eager to know what is his problem and whether you can try to solve it out or is you have any share in his way of such behaviour or have you ever asked him that what I do for you to improve your self esteem. If you really get ready to understand his problems and respect his words, he will of course, turn nicely to you. You said, you have the child to take care of. This is the only reason why he would think bad about you. Because, till you get a baby, he was your all and all and once you got the baby you didn’t get enough time to look after his issues. Yes, he can manage. But you should make a feeling that you are taking care of his matters. These all are simple techniques to maintain a balanced life. As long as he is your husband and your better half, you can be open with him and when he is in a good mood, take the subject and discuss it over. Once you both got the issue, try both of you to resolve it in a better manner. It is easy to part and not so easy to come together. And the key to such success is not with him but with you only, and only you can sort it out easily than how he does it. Check it out. Regards, Thank-s