will you look down on people who tried to kill themselves?

@chiyosan (30091)
Philippines
October 7, 2010 1:04am CST
A topic was being discussed over lunch today with my officemates, and well We have discussed about a certain local celebrity who has slashed her wrist because she was deeply hurt or depressed over a breakup... A guy officemate said that she was so cheap and pathetic that she tried to kill herself just because of a break up... I told him, that i would not say that myself because even though i have not tried to kill myself... i have had thoughts of me being dead too way too many times because i think only death could end the hurt, the suffering, the depression and for people who tries to do that - i have this understanding of them that we might think its a small thing... a bf gf thing.. but to them, no it means a lot and so we cannot judge them because of this action - after all we all have feelings and we deal with it differently. Right... How about you? will you have the same understanding for people who have become weak at their lowest time and tried to commit a crime against themselves? Or do you still think that still, they should not kill themselves and just think straight and get it over with?
11 people like this
25 responses
@meowcow (939)
• Philippines
7 Oct 10
Very good question chiyo. I agree with you that we cannot judge them because we all deal in different ways. Life is hard. Some of us laugh it off, some of us drink, and sometimes... some of us try to kill ourselves. The human mind is a very complex thing that cannot be defined in a single sentence, so moreover a mere single word... like "pathetic" or "cheap". Good for you to have an open mindset! And great topic, thanks for sharing! +!
1 person likes this
@chiyosan (30091)
• Philippines
7 Oct 10
Thanks meowcow for taking time to respond to my discussion. I felt it was a good opportunity to ask everyone here in mylot about this topic... My officemate's reaction is common, right.. people sometimes have become really quick to judge and by that they have not really thought of what reality is for most of us. have a good day!
@TheCatLady (4695)
• Israel
4 Feb 13
Your office mate obviously doesn't get it. Some people are so depressed that they don't see the light at the end of the tunnel. It is sad when they kill themselves. I know several people who have killed themselves and I feel bad for both them and their families. The worst is when they kill them self and take others with them.
@chiyosan (30091)
• Philippines
5 Feb 13
The thing is, that is right. he doesn't get it and maybe the reason is that he was used to the kind of life that probably has no challenges, he has got his parents and all - but i think when he has his own family and he suffers and have trials that he could not handle, maybe by then he would know when or how people feel when they try to kill themselves just to end the suffering they are feeling.
@youless (92401)
• Guangzhou, China
26 Oct 10
I won't look down upon on the people who try to kill themselves. On the contrary, I feel sad for them because they must have no better choice and therefore they want to end their lives. I love China
@chiyosan (30091)
• Philippines
25 Jan 13
that is true, its sad for them because they could have chosen differently, and not end their life.. the ending of their life marks the end of choices, of beautiful things they could have had only if they are able to turn things around right?
@jojo732 (295)
22 Oct 10
Hi I do not know who this celebrity is, but to try and kill herself shows that something deep inside her has hurt her so much that she does not want to carry on living with whatever it was that has ditressed her so much. I would never condemn her I think to many people are quick to judge other people in situations that they do not know about, we need to show empathy, not mean spirited judgements. jojo732
@chiyosan (30091)
• Philippines
25 Jan 13
yes, that is probably the case, i mean people will always have something on their plate, each of us are always faced with many different things and its just how we are that defines us how we deal with everything that comes our way.
21 Oct 10
People tend to say their cowards but I think they're pretty brave and desperate, I surely wouldn't feel any better of them. I suffer from depression and it's a very hard Illness to deal with. Anyone who feels so strongly to end their life needs friends, help and someone who they can inspire too. Hopefully people will learn to understand depression as it's not really a case that everyone will kill themselves.
@chiyosan (30091)
• Philippines
25 Jan 13
i joey, they can be desperate, brave to be able to do something most of us won't even be daring enough to do...
• United States
10 Oct 10
As a teenager I tried several times and no matter what anyone said to me, about me or thought they were helping me did not help. It is an utter feeling of ending, whereas you do not think about anything outside of endings. I was at the lowest points in my life and although many may say that teenager cannot have big problems wrong they are. See I have had a troubled life my entire life and never being able to trust beyond hurt. Although my feeling are in no way related to a boyfriend girlfriend situation, the feeling of ending ones life is. I have come a long way and although I have suffered immensely with depression my faith gets me going daily whereas thank God I have not had the ending thought as an adult. Unless someone actually is in the ending mode they really have no idea how it truly feels.
@chiyosan (30091)
• Philippines
25 Jan 13
hi gurl, i am grateful for you sharing this experience with us, though i have not experienced this, i have someone thought of doing it several times.. perhaps my weakness is that i am unable to do it and thus it has become my strength as well.
• United States
9 Oct 10
I think anyone who tries to kill his/herself must be hurting deeply and needs counseling not condemnation.
@chiyosan (30091)
• Philippines
25 Jan 13
its great that a lot of us here do understand someone who is going through tough times in their lives... that we all do not look down on them and actually feel for them, sometimes though there are just those people who are always quick to judge and would not even think of what the other is going through...
@bingskee (5237)
• Philippines
9 Oct 10
though it will be far from my mind to take my own life, it is only understanding that would keep someone from doing it. not every one is blessed with strength and hope. instead of condemning, we have to talk to the person and let them feel that it is not worth it. i have two friends who had made an attempt and another one very close to me who also made that attempt. listening to their stories truly made me wonder the shallowness of the attempt. i mean, they are not alone experiencing those. i think some people are just too weak to bear the pain and the sorrow.
@chiyosan (30091)
• Philippines
25 Jan 13
i think they are weak, but often we all are exposed to our weaknesses and sometimes our saving grace is just our friends, our faith, and our family - the people we will leave if we have not dared to overcome the trials we are facing.
@salonga (27963)
• Philippines
9 Oct 10
Sometimes people are judgmental. Instead of having compassion they will throw hard punches on the person who commits mistake. A person attempted to kill himself is at lost so he should be extended some guidance and compassion. We should rather be friendly to him, give him some advice and pray for him as well instead of hating him. Well maybe your office mates should know the meaning of compassion and mercy.
@chiyosan (30091)
• Philippines
25 Jan 13
yes of course we cannot please everyone, there are people who would always have their opinions on any matter in front of them.. even to people who may be suffering from such problems.
@34momma (13896)
• United States
8 Oct 10
I would never look down on someone who tried to take their own life. I would want to help them, not put them down. I think people talk bad about or put down things they don't understand or things that make them uncomfortable.
@chiyosan (30091)
• Philippines
25 Jan 13
its great that a lot of us here do understand someone who is going through tough times in their lives... that we all do not look down on them and actually feel for them and would want to help them get through the challenge... thank you for your response.
@gabs8513 (48715)
• United Kingdom
8 Oct 10
I would never look down on People that try to kill themselves These People are highly troubled no doubt about that at all and it is not the reason when they do it or try to kill themselves it is a case of lots and lots of things building up inside a Person, then something will trigger it of and well the body and mind has just had enough
@chiyosan (30091)
• Philippines
25 Jan 13
its great that a lot of us here do understand someone who is going through tough times in their lives... that we all do not look down on them and actually feel for them. thank you gabs for your response.
@Pose123 (21667)
• Canada
8 Oct 10
Hi chiyosan, People who try to kill themselves need their friends to rally around them, not look down on them. We must never judge or condemn another because we have not lived their experiences. It doesn't matter if it's because of a break-up with a boyfriend/girlfriend, or because they've lost their life savings in the stock market, it's a very big thing to the person it's happening to. I always tell people to treat others well and never bully or make fun of them, as we never know what others are thinking. Always be a good friend and make sure your friends know that you are there for them if they need to talk - and that you can be trusted with any secret. As we sew, so we will reap and we will all need a good friend sometime. Blessings.
@chiyosan (30091)
• Philippines
25 Jan 13
hi there! i agree with you... people who have been with friends around them, i think they are the ones who would be able to get through anything because they have someone with them.
• Philippines
8 Oct 10
each of us had different way of dealing with problems.if its his own decision f giving up his life for that matter nobody should question his line of thinking.If he thinks that its the only way for him/he to stop he agony in his life.No questions should be ask.No eyebrows should be raised.no comment should be heard.Whatever the outcome that had happened for sure he hadanticipated it aswell.give him/her liberty to choose her/his rest...
@chiyosan (30091)
• Philippines
25 Jan 13
yes, we do have different ways to deal with our problems... and yes we have different methods and approach to our life's problems. i just think that we can always be better when we have our family and friends with us...
@xtmlove (403)
• China
8 Oct 10
I'll never look down on people who tried to kill themselves. I know a lot of people killed themselves in every year, while more people just had this intention in a while. I believe that all of them had big trouble in their lives. Such as work pressure, emotion trouble and so on. If the around of us have these people, we need to help them, but not look down on them. After all, most of us will have the experience of high tide and low tide in the life.
@chiyosan (30091)
• Philippines
25 Jan 13
hi there! though i have never really known anyone personally who has killed themselves... i think there are indeed a lot of them ranging from many different ages, and from different cultures, and family background.
@djbtol (5498)
• United States
8 Oct 10
No, I certainly do not want to look down on such a person. It would be like kicking them when they are down. We all have strengths and weaknesses, and we all have problems. Sometimes the problems and weaknesses gang up together against the strengths. It can happen to any of us, and except for the grace of God, it could be me. However such a person needs some real strong support to overcome these issues. I can try and be a friend, and try to encourage; but more than likely some professional help will be needed.
@chiyosan (30091)
• Philippines
25 Jan 13
hi there, i agree with you. i always think that everyone is fighting a hard battle in this life and we can never belittle them into thinking that they are pathetic or weak just because they had no one with them to help them and so on.
• Philippines
7 Oct 10
I won't look down on people who tried to kill themselves but instead I'll try to give a hand on them. They need someone who would listen to them, to appreciate their stengths and accept their weaknesses. We have to be thankful that we have strong spirits to battle our own wars in life but unfortunately their not. We have to teach them and encourage them to stand up and start a new life because it isn't too late yet. There is still sunshine after the rain. We shouldn't forsake them. They still deserve another chance to correct their mistakes. Another chance to start all over again but choosing a different path...the right straight path.
@chiyosan (30091)
• Philippines
25 Jan 13
hi there warrior, thank you so much for your response to the discussion. this is much appreciated. I feel that is right, when there is someone that we know who seemed lost, worried... i think we could always offer our time and be with them, to never make them feel alone.
@sender621 (14956)
• United States
7 Oct 10
I couldn't look down on someone just because they tried to kill themselves. My heart would definitely go out to them. i would want to help them and not destroy them.
@chiyosan (30091)
• Philippines
25 Jan 13
thank you sender, that is wonderful of you to have even thought of trying to help those who would want to kill themselves. nothing is more helpful when you want to know them and understand why they do things... and give them hope.
@libramie (563)
• Philippines
7 Oct 10
Killing theirself is a big sin. Its not a right decission and a move that can't help or solve whatever the problem was instead another problem was made. This kind of person is a coward, can't faced and solve the problem bravely.
@chiyosan (30091)
• Philippines
25 Jan 13
hi libramie, yes it is of course a sin, killing someone, even yourself is against the law of God. And though we may try to understand or not, sometimes we can really just not know if we aren't in the person's shoes..
@Ramaditya (1227)
• Indonesia
7 Oct 10
I will absolutely disagree of letting people kill themselves. We live and get problems, and as a living being we have to solve it, not running away. Plus, they just don't know what will happen after they die. Is it true that killing themselves will solve the problem? But, saying "cheap and pathetic" is unacceptable as well. We cannot judge or mock someone that way because he or she wants to kill themselves. It's wrong, indeed, but as human beings that have feelings, we also have to help them with good way. Talk to them, try to listen to them, hear what their problems are, and help find the solution.
@chiyosan (30091)
• Philippines
25 Jan 13
hi ramaditya, thank you so much for your response. i see people having really sensible answers to the issue. and yes i do have my opinions and its good to have heard all yours reagarding the issue. thank you.
7 Oct 10
Hmm.. This is a very interesting topic. I admit, the first thing that comes to my mind before when I hear of someone who tries to do that is "that's crazy." I'm not sure if that will count as looking down. But I do know that for someone to try to do that, then there must be a good reason. And even though people have different perception of what a good reason is, I know that it's good enough for that person. It maybe that they have so many problems and they don't know what to do. It may be that they feel trapped by a situation or a person, or that they feel that they're alone. But I think that if those people only had someone they can talk to honestly, without fear of being judged or ridiculed, then they may not resort to committing that act.
@chiyosan (30091)
• Philippines
25 Jan 13
thank you ceasarette. i think it is really controversial, i mean people will have divided opinions on this and that we all would have our take on the issue. we can say its pathetic if they would kill themselves over a matter that could be little for us but is already so heavy for some other people. it just really depends on the situation, the family they have, the friends that never left them...