Is marriage worth it?

October 18, 2010 3:49am CST
I have been married once before, i only did this as my girlfriend bacame pregnant and as im old fashioned i thought we should be married. Well, it never lasted, none of us loved one another enough, for me it was a nightmare. I wish i could see more and more marriages working but instead it seems that many just fail. I guess people rush into things and the simpleast of things can cause problems and then divorce becomes inevitable. I wish that people really opened there eyes and make sure that marriage is right for both of them, in the olden days marriage was so strong, now it seems it is just a word with little meaning. We need to get back to the good old days of where marriage lasts and there is so much love for the couple. I do hope that this can happen.
2 people like this
12 responses
18 Oct 10
well ive never been married yet but i guess that if you find the right one then it is worth it. i was with my ex for 12 and half years but i was never bothered about marriage or really thought about it. i now think it was probably because he wasnt the one for me. yes alot of people rush into marriage and never really works. yes in the old days marriages worked and couples rarely got divorced, what has changed?
19 Oct 10
In some cases i guess society has changed. Time moves on and we get stuck in our ways. To have been with your partner for that long is a very long time. Did you not ever consider marriage? Well any of you? Was you just together for that long or was you engaged? If engaged then how come you never took the final step? What made you get engaged? If you weren't engaged how come you weren't after such a long relationship?
31 Oct 10
we were engaged but never talked about a wedding. im glad we never got wed
11 Nov 10
is there no chance of you getting married to him at all or is that it between the two of you?
@mandy8611 (154)
• China
19 Oct 10
If marrige is based on love,I think marriage is worth it. I get married last year, I met my husband in college and have been lovers for nearly 4 years. after marriage, we both feel we have more responsibility now. we have work hard to support our apartment mortgage and save money for future.but we are willing to take all the responsibilties,we are adults now, we have to face these now.but marriage let me feel I'm alone for eveything I deal with, when I'm happy, I have my huaband to share it with me, when I'm sad, I have my husband to encourage me. so marriage is definitely woth it if you love each other!
19 Oct 10
This proves that marriages can work, to show that you were lovers for quite a while, to then later on get married. You both are sensible enough to know that you have many responsibilities, mainly to eachother as you work hard for eachother in also providing a good home and to save for a future together. As you say, when your down, sad, etc you have your husband there to pick you up and cheer you up, just as i am sure that you would also do the same for him. Love is a major part and it seems the two of you have loads of it for eachother, this goes to prove in this case that a marriage is able to last, one thing you do well other than love eachother is communicate well, that is a big part of marriage.
@anneish (117)
• Philippines
28 Oct 10
i am definitely agree with you Mandy... everything and anything would be easy if you love each other.
11 Nov 10
love has to be a 2 way thing, always.
@anneish (117)
• Philippines
19 Oct 10
for me marriage is non sense if this is just your reason.. i do believe that marriage must done because of love, not because of other reasons. if you decide to get married, be sure that it is because of being in love with each other,...if love is the reason of your marriage I'm pretty sure that you will end up together what ever struggle comes or difficulties hinder into your marriage you will going to pass through it...
19 Oct 10
i agree that you must love your partner in many ways, to be able to see both positives and negatives but to love them so much that each of you know that your perfect together where marriage is the answer. But as time passes on many marriages do fail and so result in divorces. It seems now that one simple argument can lead to a divorce, or past experiences are brought up to cause problems, or they aregue and one goes and sleeps with another person, there are many reasons as to why marriages fail, but even when there are problems in a marriage, a marriage would become much much stronger if they were able to deal with the problems and sort them out together therefor creating a much stronger marriage. Every marriage has it's up and downs, some people say enough is enough straight away, but all credit to those who decide to work through there problems and stay together, that is a true marriage.
@anneish (117)
• Philippines
28 Oct 10
so that is why i'm saying that in marriage... love, is the big portion of it. as i've said that every difficulties can be solve by good conversation, and that will be possible if you both love each other cause you have concern in your marriage, that is why both of you will do possible way to make things work out.
@anneish (117)
• Philippines
28 Oct 10
and if love is present in your marriage... i think and i'm sure that no arguments will be solve in a day... and it is possible that there's no argument at all... and if there is i know it is easy for the both of you to solve it,.
• United States
18 Oct 10
The concept that "marriage was better in old days" is vastly and severely inaccurate. Marriages only stayed together because women had no where else to go. They were expected to get married as early as possible and once they found a husband they had no way out. There were very few career options for women so they were completely dependent on their husband for everything. Marriages were not "more committed" or "stable" and there certainly wasn't some deeper understanding of love, people were simply trapped socially and financially. That is no longer the case anymore so people are far more likely and able to leave a relationship that does not work for the betterment of themselves and their lives in general. There is nothing wrong with divorce, there is no shame in it. People should definitely be more careful with who and how they marry (to me there is no worse idea than getting married just because you get pregnant) but people make mistakes and people grow apart. It's far better to break up than to live a miserable life.
18 Oct 10
great input, that's me told.
• India
18 Oct 10
I agrre with u craigy..it is again ur output.
@zandi458 (27952)
• Malaysia
20 Dec 10
Marriage is a bicycle made for two. I agree that without true love, the marriage foundation will sooner or latter collapse. It is the holiness and pureness of love that sustain it and make it strong. Marriage is a blessing but many people turn their lives into a curse unlike olden marriages where the minds of marrying couples are not infected with the influences of modern technology.They were simple folks who believed in the sanctity of marriages. What with the online dating now have made many marriages end prematurely. But that is not the whole reason for divorce as there are many unfounded reasons couples feel incompatible with each other.
20 Dec 10
I agree that with technology, especially the interenet it has had a major impact on relationships of all kinds. Also there are many other reasons in which divoreces become necessary, people do change in time and we never really know what truly does happen behind closed doors. Just a shame that so many marriages seem o fail nowadays.
1 person likes this
@Bambi09 (228)
• United States
11 Nov 10
I got married at 16 when I became pregnant with my daughter. Your right, divorce is inevitable. I'm going through it now. To me, it was nothing more than a piece of paper and changed my last name. Don't see the point in it I guess. First and only time I'll ever be married. I don't think I'll ever be able to do it again lol
11 Nov 10
wow, that is young to get married, i think now many people do end up divorced, it just seems like an expensive piece of paper and a load of heartache. I met the wrong woman, i knew that, i would love to get married again, just hope next time is the right person.
@anneish (117)
• Philippines
28 Oct 10
how sad it happen to you... what happen to you is the best sample why marriage is not worth it.
11 Nov 10
i guess it really shows the bad side of marriage and what not to do.
@kjones505 (273)
• United States
19 Oct 10
No its not worth it. I have a family member who is married to an unstable man. He physically assaulted her for the second time this year and she had to run away again and call the police. It makes no sense. She was fine before he entered her life. Marriage is a sham and a waste of time. You are better off living alone and keeping your personal freedom. The "Honey moon" period may be fun but before you know it, your old, and enslaved by a wife/husband and children. That is not a life of freedom, its one of misery. Save yourself the trouble and don't get married.
19 Oct 10
Very good points. Many women do stay with aggresive husbands just because they are married or because they have children together. This is a sad site to see. Women now can get help but it is so hard to get away from what is happening. People change, you could see a loving caring side, then once married if any problems arise you may see your partner in a different light. This could alter your life massively, you may lose all respect for yourself, be hurt, lose out on money, family etc. It does go to show that if marriage was right then you really should bide your time on it to make sure that you know as much as possible about your partner before commiting yourself to them for life.
• Philippines
18 Oct 10
I think marriage is worthy because i it is not worthy no one will plan to have marriage. But i'm also confuse of other why they are hate in having marriage. But me when times comes i'm also planning to have marriage to the girl I've love.
19 Oct 10
To plan a marriage and to get married must be an amazing feeling. To show how much you truly love one another, yet many marriages now seem to fail to last. Would be easier if many people didn't rush into it and took there time really getting to know there partner first.
• Philippines
18 Oct 10
I'm sorry to hear that but we all know that marriage is a relationship that is sacred and we should put God as the center of that relationship. I still do believe that people who obey the Word of God can have their marriage in a good solid foundation. My parents and my hubby's parents are examples of that. They have been married for how many years and still sweet to each other especially my own parents. Relationship should be cared and nurtured. Both couples should know their better half more than anybody else and should be responsible and loving as always.
18 Oct 10
i fully agree with all that you say, so glad hat the love of your parents and your husbands parents is so very strong, as im sure yours also is.
• India
18 Oct 10
As you have said marriages were strong earlier. Nut now people have no regard for marriages and divorces are happening every now and then. Well, though divorces are increasing, marriages are worth.
18 Oct 10
The olden days showed exactly what marriage really is all about. The love, trust, respect, honesty, openness and commitment was all there, marriages lasted. Now it seems that they hardly ever last as there are so many divorces. People just don't fully seem to respect marriage, as though there may be doubts just before they get married, but that tells you that you really do still need more time to get to fully know eachother.
@sender621 (14956)
• United States
18 Oct 10
I will always believe that marriage is worth trying for. e just have to be sure thAT we are getting married for the right reasons. As long as there is love and commitment, marriage can certainly be worth it.
18 Oct 10
I think many people do rush in to this quite quickly and without fully knowing who they are marrying. It has to be right, there has to be so much love. They are to commit themselves to eachother forever so no room for mistakes.