can you be alone without being lonely?

@johan143 (165)
Philippines
October 22, 2010 4:36am CST
When i was still single i used to eat alone in a fancy restaurant, watch movies, shop, go to the gymn to exercise, stroll and go to church all by myself. Some of my friends told me that they can't do it, especially going to the moviehouse all by themselves, they said it must be lonely and fearful. i told them that i watch movies that i know is wholesome where no bad/sick peoples will go. And the point is i don't feel lonely at all. I thought its a kind of achievement. i even travel alone to the beaches. I remember i went to BORACAY (Philippines) alone and met this two guys from sweden. They did enjoy the beach, the sight, the hospitality and tourist spots in the Philippines. We even became friends. How about you? can enjoy life alone?
1 person likes this
23 responses
22 Oct 10
Yes I can.hahaha actually for me, it's fun being single. you have nothing to think about, you are free. you can go anywhere you want to go without asking permission to someone. Really you went there alone? that sounds fun! I heard there are so many bars there where you can gimmick.
@johan143 (165)
• Philippines
27 Oct 10
I went there alone but the place i stay was reserve by my sister who knows the owner of the resort. My sister thought i was with a classmates, that's why she was permissive. Yes, it was fun. I enjoyed watching the beach volleyball tournament. at night, I went to two of the bars there because some of the waitres and waiters thought i was lonesome in my room and they invite me to stroll along the beach and see the place at night. i thought i was in another country beacuse the place was full with foreigners. I was thou kind of sad when one of my friends/waiter said that "he though that the place was hell when it time for the holy week and everybody was dancing to the load music". we Filipinos are really very religious and not liberated. Hey! be very careful in going to bars! i even cut my hairs very short before i go BORACAY because i don't want to attract attention. I even bring teargas for my protection. My newly found friend/ waitresses/waiters were my angels.
28 Oct 10
yeah, and there are so many artists there during summer. but the place I really wanted to go is Palawan, I think if you want real nature you go to palawan but if you want party go to boracay.:)
@johan143 (165)
• Philippines
4 Nov 10
hello there shshshshsh! there is a new place which is also very nice to go on vacation, its in Bicol, Camsur, were wakeboarding is a real fun, advance reservation is a must to save you from any disappointments, a lot of foreigners also go there, and local stars i saw carlyn aguilar last week. another one is GOTA beach, its also a white sand, the survivor - french version had that occupied, if im not mistaken...last year. you may visit the camsur.com and see some pictures to give you an idea.
@kodukodu84 (1576)
• Malaysia
23 Oct 10
I'm always living alone without being lonely. I do everything by myself and I am so happy about it because I make all the decisions by myself and no one is telling me that this or that will do better for them. I love privacy, I like eating when I'm hungry, I like sleeping when I'm sleepy, I like working as long as I want, I love travelling without having all my plan suited with the other person's need, no way! I really enjoy being independent and so all my best friends are I have many good friends who are also independent and living their life to the fullest without anyone controlling their everyday plan. We do meet with each other but with a proper plan and good timing for everyone. Oh, I'm getting married too, but my fiance understands the kind of life I love to live for at the moment, and he's still romantic to me as always. Then every time we are together, we always love planning for oursleves without involving any of our friends, because we also love living our life together alone without feeling lonely haha
@johan143 (165)
• Philippines
4 Nov 10
hello kodukodu84! Congratulation in advance to both of you. Have a happy private and peaceful life! I also like that life, i also don't want any friend or officemates of my husband calling him during weekends, if its not really urgent. Sometimes, it bothers me when they ask for favors during our family bonding days.
• Philippines
23 Oct 10
Being alone but not lonely is possible but not easy really.And for most people it takes practice to get used to it. Some adjusts easily while some has to resort to anti-depressants and other things that are harmful for their welfare. I'm going to share how i cope with being alone, and doesn't get lonely most of the times. I do facebook, I do mylot, I make videos and when I feel creative i write poems. I wouldn't say i dont get lonely, for i do and it just kills me.So i try to bounce back to life and tell myself that i got more blessings than misfortunes.Then I open my laptop , and there I am, being transported to a world where i can be friendly, creative and productive. (^_^)
@johan143 (165)
• Philippines
4 Nov 10
Hello lipstick209! its nice to read your response. I also beleive that sometimes being alone makes me productive and creative. Yes, concentrate on the blessings not on the misfortunes. God bless.
@chiyosan (30199)
• Philippines
23 Oct 10
I have not tried being alone in a place far from where i live... I have just been alone in shopping malls, in public places, etc and yes i do find myself enjoying time whenever i have time only for myself.. its good to always feel happy and secured about yourself. Maybe soon, i will travel alone and try if that is a good thing to do... I think my bf will not approved of it though. he he
@johan143 (165)
• Philippines
4 Nov 10
hello chiyosan! hahaha! i also don't have a boyfriend when i went to Boracay alone. even my parents will not permit me if i had told them about it.they were in the province and i was leaving with my sister who also don't know that i have no one with me. She thought i was with my college classmates/girl friends.
@keshia2007r (2886)
• United States
22 Oct 10
i can enjoy my time alone(out shopping, eating or the movies) but i can't enjoy life alone. as being growing old alone. we are somewhat alike, i too love watching movies alone. in face i just watched "life as we know it" alone earlier today at the movie theater. i've always said, if you can't have fun by yourself, who else can you have fun with? nobody. you have to like yourself first, before you can like somebody else. you know? but i too, have ran into people, who ask me why i go to the movies alone. my answer, because i'm comfortable spending time alone. but a full life alone. no, i rather have somebody there for me and with me.
@johan143 (165)
• Philippines
4 Nov 10
hello keshia 2007r! i definitely agree with you!
@Hatley (164354)
• Garden Grove, California
22 Oct 10
hi johan yes I can be alone and enjoy myself,nobody fussing at me or complaining as long as I do have friends and my son to turm to at times. I am comfortable with myself finally in my old age. You can actually feel lonely with someone in the room if that person does not pay a bi t of attention to you. but I do not mind being alone much o f the time.I like myself and am better company than some old grouch.
@johan143 (165)
• Philippines
4 Nov 10
Hello thank you again hatley. Well, i think being comfortable with oneself is very important so not to feel lonely. It's good to be alone than with somebody who is full of negative thoughts and with a very depressed person. I remember also my grandma who is full of energy even in her old age. She likes us grandchildren and we like her too.
@sender621 (14956)
• United States
22 Oct 10
You don't have to be lonely to be alone. Some people enjoy this solitude. it is a time when they can reflect and organize their thoughts.
@johan143 (165)
• Philippines
4 Nov 10
well said sender621.thanks for your reply.
@picjim (3003)
• India
22 Oct 10
I would go to movies and other places alone when i was young.Even now i can be at ease when i'm alone without feeling lonely or bored.I made many friends while i was alone.Like you i used exercise alone at a gym.I would go to religious discourses alone and enjoy the experience.
@johan143 (165)
• Philippines
4 Nov 10
hello picjim! its nice to read that you enjoy your self alone without feeling sorry for your self. but some locations are also nice places to make friends with like the gymn and religious discourses.i believe that it will not also deprive you of your privacy. God bless.
@monkeylong (3146)
• Guangzhou, China
23 Oct 10
As far as I am concerned, I think it is not easy to be feeling lonely with yourself there. For me, If I was alone at home, sometimes I will be feel lonely to stay there. I just want to have some friends or relatives there. If we really can not feel the loneliness when we are alone, there must be something that we really enjoy so much in our daily life.
• Canada
23 Oct 10
Well I personally think most people can live a life alone and be happy. After awhile of being alone most people would adjust and learn to do things that makes them happy. Although you do get some needy people who can't and should not be on their own!lol
@Yada25 (44)
22 Oct 10
I used to be able to but I am not sure now. Before that I am all the single and quit independent, I usually do every on my own, I used to go to the movie alone too it wasn't too bad having a cup of coffee in a nice coffee shop a lone reading and watching people in the shopping center. I didn't feel that lonely I quit like it you can have time to consider everything in the way that you never see it if you come with people. Now I have a bf and I get used to of having someone with me I think it will make me feel lonely for sure if I have to do everything alone again. I remember when we first together, I didn't like it much to have him with me sometime because I want to do as I used to.
• Philippines
22 Oct 10
Definitely! Solitude is underrated because too many people equate it with being lonely. Some fail to realize that solitude is a personal choice to be alone, and not just because you're alone. I treat this as "Me" time, and something very precious. Now that I'm in a relationship with someone, it gets harder and harder to find the time to do things you like doing alone. I'm talking about reading books without interruptions, watching TV shows that you like or even practicing yoga without worrying about demands from your loved ones.
@Kirinx (1693)
• United States
22 Oct 10
I can enjoy life single no problem but not totally alone which is why I make my sister go with me when we are going out to the mall or whatever. I wouldnt want to go everywhere completly alone though I mean everyone now and then needs some personal time to them themselves but going outside to the mall, museums and other places solo sounds kinda boring. Too much quiet gets dull Its sometimes nice to have other company with you as well.
@wolfie34 (26792)
• United Kingdom
22 Oct 10
I love being alone! I wouldn't have it any other way. I actually class myself and tell people who ask that I am Happily Single! I do everything on my own, go shopping, go to the gym, go travelling, I even go on holiday on my own! I am very independent. I can do what I like, go where I like and please myself! I am a free spirit. I am spending the rest of my life single, I never ever want a relationship, it's great being single and I am never lonely, I don't get bored of my own company. I love my freedom too much to get involved with anybody.
@yanyanyow (329)
• Philippines
22 Oct 10
yes i can do that for some certain times. i really sometimes enjoy being alone because i dont need to worry anything or anyone. but i dont think i can watch movie alone in the movie house, it seems pretty boring. i love going to the gym alone, it is my sacred place to release everything inside of me.
@niairen01 (1018)
• Philippines
22 Oct 10
Good for you! For being so independent. I do that myself sometimes, but there's always an empty space inside. I tend to get lonely and wondered why I am alone at that very moment. I have loads of friends but sometimes you can't just help to choose to just be with yourself and enjoy. although for me, at the end of the day, no matter how lovely I spent my day alone I end up lonely.
• Philippines
22 Oct 10
like you,I can go out on my own.I enjoy eating out on my own.I watch movies on my own.I watched Eat,Pray,Love on my own.I shop on my own.I don't think it is lonely being alone.in fact,I have more fun being alone.I don't have anybody to worry than myself.I can treat myself to anything I want.
@Fireheart (683)
• India
22 Oct 10
To be alone is what i least like, most of the time when my friends give me company that i feel like myself being alone makes your mind more unstable and hard to cope up with others, sometimes its different you see people do sometimes need to be alone at some point not all time, people need others to share their feeling when at times of happiness and sorrow to tell them how you feel. and enjoyment is other especially when you hang out with some one who gives you company at all time.
@blesila (92)
22 Oct 10
yes, i can. it's one way of standing on your own. being alone doesn't mean that you will be lonely most of the time. it's one way of knowing one's self. aside from it, it will strengthen your faith with GOD. i admit that i want to be alone most of the time because i want will help me grow independently and being alone means no destructions. i can do what i want to.
@RONDOLAWE (776)
• Indonesia
22 Oct 10
Hello there , being alone is very nice go every where is alone and eat alone anything alone is good but not good enough cause will be searching for friend and want some friend and wife , yes i know what you mean . if we are alone we can control our self not be rude or bad cause we alone and get some crime alone too no body knowing but all the time alone is has good side and bad side , not much like it