As a human, do you feel obliged to have children?

@Lore2009 (7388)
United States
November 4, 2010 6:14pm CST
Originally, I was going to write "As a WOMAN but, some men may feel like they should too... so, AS A HUMAN, do you feel obliged to have children? Do you think just because you're a human you should have kids? Do you think that completes you life? I used to think this, but now I don't. Man, I was brainwashed.
3 people like this
17 responses
@marguicha (103813)
• Chile
5 Nov 10
I think it´s a good idea to have a couple of brats, if you can afford them. I have always had this love-hate relationship with my daughters (both wonderful people) but I couldn´t imagine myself nor my life without them. I have seen people with no children and they don´t learn the meaning of the word generosity. They are awfully self centered and it´s not their fault, poor things. I guess if I hadn´t had kids I would have adopted a couple. If I had had more than my two, I´d be in a lunatic asylum with a dozen shrinks surrounding me. Still, I don´t think my lofe WAS to have chidlren. Iis an important part but not the whole of it.
1 person likes this
5 Nov 10
Kids are a "mind funk" to be sure lol. Figuring out how to approach them on things is a million times more difficult than a rubix cube and I am terrible with those things ha!
5 Nov 10
Arrgggghhhh!! This is exactly what I think a lot of people think! They say that they don't think it, as if they don't want to look like someone else is telling them what to do but I really think they do feel like they have to. I have never wanted kids. I have never imagined it and I can't say I am never going to want children but at the moment I cannot see it happening. When I tell people this it's like i'm exploiting the number one rule of being a woman. When in fact a lot of people have children without actually taking into consideration the fact that they then have to look after that child for the rest of their lives. Its a responsibility that I myself, don't think that I would like... way toooo many risks! Im glad others on here feel that its ok to decide that you dont want to have children. :)
@Lore2009 (7388)
• United States
5 Nov 10
I sure it a responsibility and it's unfortunate that a lot of people can't realize this.
@jambi462 (4598)
• United States
4 Nov 10
I don't feel obliged to have children but I personally would enjoy having a child or two at some point in my life. Finding my current girlfriend and being in a relationship with her and seeing all of her positive qualities, I keep thinking about how beautiful of a child we could form together. I also think of how we are always trying to learn the most we can about living healthily and improving life overall. I feel that together we could raise a child with tons of potential for a great life. I want to wait until I get into a much better financial position in life though because I want to be able to take care of our children to the best of my ability if I ever have any. I want to be able to get a job or work where I would have time to spend with my kids as well. I feel that raising a child would be an incredible experience that is part of the life process but it certainly doesn't have to be if you don't want it. There are a vast number of purposes out there as well
1 person likes this
@Lore2009 (7388)
• United States
5 Nov 10
Your response is lovely! I'm glad you found someone you can feel that way towards and I'm also glad you know you have choices. Thanks for sharing.
4 Nov 10
No I don't think that. I personally am planning to adopt children when I settle down. I don't think I should feel obliged to have children 'cos the human population is increasingly dramtically every year and I don't want to add to it, especially as all of the earth's resources are running out. Also, I'd like to think that I'd be giving a child another chance in life and that in itself will complete my life.
@Lore2009 (7388)
• United States
5 Nov 10
That sounds like a good plan.
• China
10 Nov 10
Here,a family with no kid can not be called a complete family.(i do not know the situation of other countries.)After getting married(at least within 5 years or so),a young couple should have kid,it is very normal and common,just like you eat breads because you are hungery or there is no more special reason,just cause you love kids.Some people say if one does not want to have a kid,then he/she need not get married,ugh it seems that people getting married only for having a baby.And most people are not willing to adopt children,they just want to have their own childern,since nowadays,it will spend too much money and energy raising a child.Can not deny that kids bring so much happiness and joy to each family.It would be blessed with a couple of kids.China is a traditional country,people also feel obliged to have childern,(that is my view)for having children in life means continuance of life to parents and also when getting older they have their childern to take care of them.Anyway,i do not feel obilged to have childern unless i really want to...May you happy!And above all,no matter what others say,just be you.My life,my choice!
10 Nov 10
Where do you live then? Where I live (England) the situation is very different. It is quite normal to have a child without getting married and many married couples haven't even thought about having children yet. Yeah, the problem with China though, is their discrimination against women. As a result many little baby girls are abondoned and left in care homes. I'm considering possibly adopting a Chinese baby girl when I settle down.
@rinfour (250)
• Philippines
5 Nov 10
I actually never thought I had to procreate. It is not really part of my plan. I've already talked about this with my parents, and they seemed incredulous. I was around 14 years old then so they didn't take me seriously. But Almost a decade after, I still think that I am meant to have children. I love my niece and nephews, but as for giving birth to one of my own? It's out of the question. There are many ways that I can contribute to society; having a child is not one of my methods.
@rinfour (250)
• Philippines
5 Nov 10
Sorry, i meant I amNOT meant to have children
@Lore2009 (7388)
• United States
5 Nov 10
My parents try to convince me to but, it's pretty annoying.
@rinfour (250)
• Philippines
6 Nov 10
Well, so far my parents aren't pestering me about the matter. Primarily because I still do not have a husband and I consider myself to be too young to get married. And I think they are in no rush to add more children to the family and there is no threat of "ending the bloodline" since my siblings already have children. LOL
• Israel
5 Nov 10
not really , i think that only if you want to have children you may have them , you cant have children while you dont want them its like having a bike that you dont want and you still ride on them and suffer from every minute .
@Lore2009 (7388)
• United States
5 Nov 10
That's a funny analogy but true.
@Angelwriter (1956)
• United States
5 Nov 10
Nope. I've never felt obligated. I don't feel incomplete. I'm devoid of all maternal instinct, don't like babies (understatement) and have no desire to push some 6 pound-give or take- being out of me. There are plenty of other people who are doing just fine making sure the population doesn't die out. My biological clock is non existent. When my mom talks about her desire for grandchildren, I tell her she's free to look into adoption, because she'll be waiting a long time to get any out of me.
@Lore2009 (7388)
• United States
5 Nov 10
That's great, haha. I'm glad you know what you want and sticks to it.
@foofermen (503)
4 Nov 10
I am a 24 year old man. I have one biological son and one step son. I love my kids more than I love anybody else. I feel like I was born to be a dad sometimes. I want more kids and grand kids eventually. I don't feel obligated to do anything. I WANT more kids. There are many people I really wish did/ would not have kids lol.
@Lore2009 (7388)
• United States
5 Nov 10
That's nice to know that you really want it and it is like a dream/goal to look forward to.
@dodo19 (33989)
• Beaconsfield, Quebec
4 Nov 10
No I really do not feel like I'm obligated to have kids or anything like that. I will have kids at some point, not because I have to, but because I want to have kids. Some might feel obligated. However, I'm certainly not one of them. I want have kids. I don't feel like I have to have kids. I feel obligated to do so.
@Lore2009 (7388)
• United States
5 Nov 10
I'm glad you are aware of your choices.
@ajosh319 (100)
• Philippines
10 Nov 10
As a human i dont feel obliged to have a child, but I want to have a child of my own in the future is it nice to see being with them, your companion
• United States
6 Nov 10
I don't feel like I need to have children, if I didn't have a heart I would probably choose not to bring them into this world. But for selfish reasons, I want children, and will plan to raise them "right."
@savypat (20246)
• United States
6 Nov 10
I was never motivated to have my own children, Hubby felt it was important so we had 3. I always felt there were more then enough children in the world and would have been happy to adopt instead of birth.
@lady1993 (20416)
• Philippines
6 Nov 10
Not really [obliged kind of sounds like it's become a burden or something] But God did say that we should go and multiply. For me, having achild is not a need but a want..I haven't really heard of a couple who doesn't want children. They complete a family, and brings more happiness to people...I want to have them too someday.
@gunjanpri (602)
• India
6 Nov 10
No I did not unless I felt how they are as essential as any other part of your life. I was diagnosed with endometriosis and the doctor told me to get married , have children and the disease will go. That is what happened. S now I am blessed with a healthier life and and rosy daughter.
5 Nov 10
good grief no! i luv my kids and had them for what i feel are all the right reasons, but when i was younger i couldn't even see myself with kids... i have never felt like i 'had to have children' or that it was 'expected' :)
@libramie (562)
• Philippines
5 Nov 10
We can't called a family if a husband and wife have no child coz a family composed of a father, mother and a child or children. But having a child is a gift grant by God. A woman had no power to have or bear a baby by her own so as man so therefore I think its not a human's obligation to have but to rear and take care what God give unto human.
5 Nov 10
I never felt obliged to have children and neither did my wife but we did want children at a young age compared to most people. I enjoy having children as they bring soo much love and happiness to your life.