When A Man Chase A Woman is So Beautiful, But ...

@creyos (276)
Indonesia
November 5, 2010 1:47am CST
I heard many times from my friend's stories who married or single that usually if a guy is going after a girl, he would be very nice, keep doing the same things regularly to get her, i.e. call the girl often, send text msg to the girl in definite times, etc. Then once he gets the girl, he tends to change these habits slowly. He's still saying that he loves the girl so much, but he doesn't show it like he did before. Is that really true about this saying? And why does the guy tend to do that? Is this a sign of cheating or boredom with the relation? Or is this a sign of the guy will leave the girl soon? Should the girl talk or ask the guy about this? And what should the girl do to convince herself if there's nothing bad happened in the relationship?
8 responses
• United States
5 Nov 10
It is like most in relationships who feel that they are so secure that they take their significant other for granted and not go out of their way to please them anymore. I have experienced this in the past as well. Unfortunately I recognized it right away but not my past partners. I am however in a relationship now for 5 years and counting my blessings. As my boyfriend goes out of his way to please in many ways. But with relationships though it is a two way street as well, as many women initially get their hair, makeup and dress nicely. But once in a relationship they tend to lax back a bit. So in order for things to remain and or improve they must remember the initial courting days. As see I am one to continue to up keep my personality and my looks as well as it continues to drive zest into our relationship and I know my boyfriend likes it.
@creyos (276)
• Indonesia
5 Nov 10
Hi ... is that you mean that the guys that change after they get the girl are actually just take the girl for granted and not for the serious relationship?
@creyos (276)
• Indonesia
6 Nov 10
Alright, I got it now! :)
@lady1993 (13032)
• Philippines
6 Nov 10
I think that is the case for most guys.. When they are still courting a girl they behave in their best behavior and do the stuff that you said and more..but when he got the girl already his attitude changes. Maybe that's just how it is, but luckily not all guys are like that. Maybe it's a sign of boredom and the couple needs a heart to heart talk..
@creyos (276)
• Indonesia
6 Nov 10
Really not all guys are like that?
@lady1993 (13032)
• Philippines
6 Nov 10
Yes, I've known a few guys like that- the boy friends of some of my friends.. But i also know guys who are still sweet all the time with their girlfriends.. My dad too is not like that..
@thanks1961 (7049)
• India
5 Nov 10
Hi dear, We should consider things little broadly. Everyone is different in nature and behaviour. As you said, if a boy like a girl and he wish her to be his friend or would like to get her as a company, he will try his best to get her. Once he find that she is ok, then he can be in line with her at any point of time. But if he wish to have a long relationship and want her to be of his own, he will continue to be good with her. However, as you may be aware, the y the new young generation boys have not bright outlook on the matured friendship and even girls also the same. In such cases, what an intelligent girl to do is, do not disclose the full self to them. I mean to say, be reserved and the girl should not ‘lose’ anything what she has as valuable. Most of the young generation, as I see, is not so bothered about the things and they are not serious about others life also. So, it is our duty to understand or study the boy or man, how he is and do not disclose anything, until you understand them well. Also, you should have a ‘hold’ on all things what you feel. Even after some time, you should not have a feeling that you are a loser, and they will gain whatever they want during the course of time. Many are get convinced of such things only after some time and by the time, the boys must have gained what they want. So be one step ahead always while dealing with such things. Regards, Thank-s
@creyos (276)
• Indonesia
6 Nov 10
Hi, this is really a well explanation!
• India
9 Nov 10
Thank you. Thank-s
@KeenoT (31)
• United States
5 Nov 10
I think it is normal for a guy to try harder until he gets the girl. There is bound to be some let down when he knows he has won the girls affections. Without knowing all the details it's hard to make a judgment but if he loves her I would expect him to talk to or see her every day if possible.
@ellyza (29)
• Philippines
5 Nov 10
yes I agree.and i do believed that if the guy really love the girl he will make the way to communicate with her.
• Philippines
5 Nov 10
I agree that most of the time guys tend to ber like that. They try to win your heart or fal in love with them, by being sweet and thoughtful. But once they got what they want they tend to be cold. Or once maried, They forget to give or show their affection. Guys tend to be more swet when they are stil courting or when you are still not maried, but their swetnes fades away once they are married.Or for singles, they become cold if they found a nerw girl.
@creyos (276)
• Indonesia
6 Nov 10
It's a bitter fact, isn't it? But we should face anyway. ;)
• United States
5 Nov 10
Infatuation creates feelings of urgency, anxiety and the compulsive desire to be as impressive and appealing as possible. So in the early days, everything feels heightened, you want to call the person every five minutes, you want to look and act your absolute best. Once you get to know the person and you become more comfortable, you become more yourself. You relax, you act more natural, you don't feel compelled to see the person every waking moment because you are comfortable in your relationship. Many young or new relationships are powered solely by infatuation so when it begins to fade, the relationship begins to wane. However, there is a big difference between disinterest and comfortableness and they are usually pretty easy to tell apart. But the best method is always communication. If you are feeling neglected, the ASK. If you are feeling disinterested then be honest about it.
@creyos (276)
• Indonesia
6 Nov 10
I agree that the best method is communication, by communicating we would know the problem and decide the solution which best for both. :)
@mybabe (33)
5 Nov 10
i experience that situation also of the thing a guy when courting a girl will do the stuffs like texting and calling often but when the girl been his her girlfriend there's a change to the way the guy treat the girl. but for me i experience it when we already married. the things that my boyfriend before are doing to me like constant texting, calling been changed when we are already married. i think he is more confident and feel secure that iam his own and nobody can get me from him coz we are already married. the fact that we are still in a realtionship of boyfriend/girlfriend there's a way that i can be taken by other guys unlike if we are already married iam his own and his secure on me.
@creyos (276)
• Indonesia
5 Nov 10
Does it mean the boyfriend who changed is just not serious with the girl?
@del2010 (77)
• Philippines
6 Nov 10
If the guy is not really serious with her relationship with the girl the first thing that she will do is to try to get her. The best thing is to observed the guy first if he is really serious in such relationship.