What will you do if your husband cheated on you?

Philippines
December 10, 2010 12:29am CST
What if the man you choose to marry and to grow old with cheated on you? Men are considered to be polygamous in nature but not all of them are the same, correct? There will always be a good apple in a basket of rotten ones. What if the good apple became your husband and after a couple of years of getting married, you will just find out that he is cheating on you, what will you do? should there be a room for second chances? is sorry i got tempted enough for both of you still be good despite of everything? If you have the same experience,please share. It will help a lot of wives cope up or at least know what to exactly when faced in such a situation.:)
1 person likes this
7 responses
• Philippines
10 Dec 10
Hello chelzeea07! If my husband cheated on me then I will make sure that he will regret it for the rest of his life! I am serious, I will have to leave him then, if he can do it once then I am sure he will be able to do it again...
• Philippines
10 Dec 10
hi frenzylady, yeah that is what cheaters deserve, and he will regret it for sure. you can either file them both an adultery case or let them go to hell if you caught them in flagrante de licto...lol...you can never trust somebody who swore to love you forever but failed to keep the vows!
11 Dec 10
Hi frenzylady & Chelzeea07 I totally agree it is hard to trust someone after they cheat on you. I beleive yes you can forgive them but there is always going to be that thought in the back of your head of I wonder if my spouse is cheating on my etc. But I know some people who have gotten through it with counseling. But I strongly beleive that you have to respect the person you are with you took vows.
• Philippines
11 Dec 10
counselling works for some cases especially if the couple would still want to work things out but if its already one sided, i don't think it is possible. trust is very hard to regain. the situation has not happened to me yet, hopefully it wont happen...but then if it does, I am only human, and only God forgives. I wont allow my husband to do the same thing but if he does, i will surely call it off and no more turning back...its a big slap on my face and i can never take the insult and the pain,...i will have him face legal suits, both of them...if i cant have him, then nobody can, but they have a chance to be together, in prison or.... lol
@sender621 (14956)
• United States
10 Dec 10
When a husband cheats on his wife, the bonds of trust are broken. They can't always find their way back. it changes the relationship when someone is unfaithful. It would never be the same no matter how many bridges were croseed.
• Philippines
11 Dec 10
you are right sender 621. trust is so hard to gain so it must be kept. And once it is broken, everything will change.,
@Pisces54 (49)
• United States
10 Dec 10
I will probably let him go if he will be happy with the other person. It will hurt a lot but that is life. As I grow older I've learned people change. His needs become different from your own. And to satisfy those needs he will look elsewhere. The problem is when he learned that the satisfaction of those needs is not really worth it and being with you is better then he comes back. To me if it is the first time then I will accept him back but the second time then no because then he is not worth it anymore. Then i will find somebody who will be more in tune with what I need in life. Growing old together as in age literally doesn't apply. It should be growing old together not only in age but emotionally, mentally, and focusing in goals that apply to both of you. You see, I think there should be excitement in growing old together. And most of the time that is missing in a relationship. Also the hardest part in a relationship is letting a person go when you love him so much.
• Philippines
11 Dec 10
letting go is hardest part, but you should not allow anyone or anybody to hurt you because if he/she does it once and you just forgive and forget, tendency is he/she will do it again. you should love yourself a little more.
• United States
10 Dec 10
First and foremost, I have to say that men and women are equally likely to cheat in a relationship. Men are not "naturally polygamous" anymore than women are. To answer the question, it would depend entirely on the circumstances. How and why. What exactly did he do? Why did he do it?
• Philippines
11 Dec 10
yeah your right , when men can do it, so as women...also, you can ask how and what exactly happened but the point is he/she cheated, and oftentimes, you wouldn't ask and you wouldn't wanna know why. men would always have 3 excuses...1. they got tempted, 2. they don't care for and love you anymore so they want to find a way out., 3. it is your fault, he or she did it because of you and thats putting the blame on you... these excuses will really hurt and very unacceptable.
@totor_53 (223)
• Philippines
10 Dec 10
In my own opinion, i would not directly judge my partner if he/she had cheated on me unless it is proven with evidences. But if I would reach to that point, what I am gonna do is to talk to my partner and tell him/her of the sin he has committed on my part and on the church i would ask him what would he/she do either he/she would want to continue this marriage and promise to be loyal or end this relationship. But i know human as we are and by just simply hearing that your partner cheats on you, we would easily believe without considering that we are being selfish on our part to our partners. It is therefore in your decision on what you are going to do because, we, mylotters are just here to give you our opinions on your situation not to direct your life.
• Philippines
10 Dec 10
yes of course, everyone of us are entitled to our own opinions and we are responsible to every decisions we do in our life. we all have different ways to deal with problems or situations like that.
@shia88 (4582)
• Malaysia
10 Dec 10
Hi, If I were in this situation whereby my husband is cheated on me..then I will see what kind of action he has done. In what way he cheated me. If he has another woman in his life, of course, I won't give him another chance and straightly will get a divorce from him. That is because I won't share my husband with another woman. ALthough if in the end he realized his big mistake and wanna patch back with me, I won't accept his forgiveness. My heart is not big enough to forget what he has done to me. Although my mouth will say that I forgive him,but everytime when I see him...the hurt feeling is there and for sure I won't have a happy life. Therefore divorce is still the best decision for life. Given that we have a children from our marriage,of course, my children will have to be with me.
• Philippines
10 Dec 10
yeah, as the saying goes, it is easy to forgive but it is really very hard to forget. Its like, every time you see him, you will also see the face of the woman he was with when he was not with you! that can be totally devastating!
• Philippines
10 Dec 10
He cheated on me, not once, not twice and i dumped him after 14years. I have stayed for the sake of my children.Although i never really caught him in action but do i really have to for its a knowledge that a woman's instinct is almost always credible. And all throughout the times that I felt and knew it, i have this feeling of anger bottling up inside me, but im stuck cause im married. If i was single, i would never give him another chance to cheat on me again unless he makes a promise and marry me, otherwise he stay out of my life for good. (^_^)
• Philippines
10 Dec 10
that is i guess the hardest part of being married. you get stuck even when there are a reason for you to go, because of your kids and the marriage. But even so, i don't think I can do what you did. make everything work despite of everything and wow that was 14 years of bad luck. Your a very strong woman, we all have to be, for the sake of the children, but then our kids has the right to live in a home where love, faith and respect exist. Thank God you finally made it. Good luck to you liptick2009