torn between two dreams

Philippines
January 1, 2011 10:03pm CST
Since I was a child, I used to have so many dreams and ambitions in life. Those dreams include owning a house of my own and getting married with my prince charming. I never thought these dreams would contradict with each other. Well, I am in a relationship and we are together for more than 7 years now. We were too young when we started our relationship. Everything about us seems to be okay. We have planned about our wedding when I reach 25, that is more than 2 years from now. But I guess it won't be as easy as that anymore because the money we are trying to work hard for will be used for another purpose. My father is already old and is just renting a small house near his workplace. He's alone because I live with my boyfriend. He doesn't really know about it, actually. My boyfriend got pity on him that he decided to use the money we will make for buying a new house for the three of us. I know it was intended for something good. But it also means that our wedding might happen after how many long years due to insufficient budget. We can't afford to have two things at a time. It's truly hard for me but what can I do?
6 responses
@mhypie03 (683)
• Philippines
3 Jan 11
Just right for this post. I have just read a blog from Bo Sanchez a while ago. The title is 29 things you can do to have a fantastic 2011. Number 25 is "to put people over projects". I am also a dreamer of my own grand wedding but since I earn more than my bf, it could be possible but it's still up to his own means. With that I'd rather have a civil wedding at the proper time so we could work together overseas and save for that day, a church wedding. Time is very gold for all of us. He's turning 30 this year while I'm turning 24. We have to decide wisely as fast as we can. My mom wants to build another house in the province because she gets depressed on our current home and I have to help on that. So I am also torn between which one to prioritize. So, I decided to get rich in 5 years time. No kidding! I mean, nothing's impossible. I'd rather dream big and set all things straight like these two. My mom is 59 this month so I have to help her build this dream as well and her time is very limited than us. I prayed on 2009 to double my monthly salary and yes it came true on 2010 when I resigned from my previous company. The answer to this is to multiply your source of income but you'll have to work hard. Also last year, I was able to start my own online business. I was able to earn the minimum wage of an emplyee by selling clothes and shoes I got from chinese supplier. Now, my third stream of income is selling anion health care napkins which is under a multi-level marketing company so later on it will be a passive income. I got also my own variable life insurance where it includes retirement plan. Remember time is precious. Think of a thing you loved the most and translate that into a business language. Read books. Seek advices. Above all, PRAY! If you dwell unto choosing only one option when you can have both, you might regret it later on. Think about it. All the best! -MHY
@acey76 (1276)
• Philippines
2 Jan 11
well me being an only child would not be confused on whom i got to choose,your father is old and he deserves to be cared till his last day, you wedding can wait cause you and your boyfriend is still young if your are destined for life, don't be afraid, to give some attention to your father we only have one father
@piya84 (2581)
• India
2 Jan 11
How much money it require to have wedding in you country?Just asking for curiosity.I am in my mid twenty and till date things were good here,but in last 5-10 years price of everything has gone beyond imagination.I am earning very well but still its so painful to use that all hard earned money for just one day. I am thinking about small marriage,like small get together and marriage in the presence of few people.
@PDBME2 (1014)
• United States
2 Jan 11
I dreamed the same thing so it has been disappointing for me to never have this big wedding. I've been married twice and both were done in a city government office. I had hoped that when we got to be ten years married we'd renew our vows but it never happened. We did buy a home this year. We had one from my parents before but this one we got on our own with God's help. Sometimes the marriage thing would be nice but now I'm older and I think it would look funny seeing this old lady going to the altar. I think that as long as we're married it's what is important. My wedding band is not the most expensive but you know we have God's blessing by trying to do right.
• Philippines
2 Jan 11
hi! i can see how much your boyfriend is willing to give up for your father. you should at least do the same. after all, it's YOUR FATHER we are talking about here. don't worry about your marriage being possibly delayed. if you are meant for each other, both of you should be willing to wait for your wedding to happen, even if you have to wait for 10 years.
@magicchou (163)
• China
2 Jan 11
When I first read your confusion, I could come home to your heart. Though I am a college sthdent now, I can experience such tough condition. Bucause, nowadays days in China, there are less jobs for college students especially those which is not famous. I can imagine how hard to find a gob. And I can also imagine I wii confront the same condition as yours. In my opinion, you can hold a simple wedding for the time being. Some times latter, when you have enough money you can hold a more decent wedding. But the precondition is you and your boyfriend are willing to do so, and you have the determinnation to make handsome money. I do hope you can tackle this problem very well and you can live harmonously with your boyfriend and your father! All the best wishes to you!