After planning to settle down, what are your possible fears?

By eM
@eLsMarie (4148)
Philippines
January 4, 2011 7:42am CST
Commitment is a process and it can shake people's heads a bit especially with men. I saw a movie just this morning titled Up in the air starring George Clooney and there's one scene there from where his sister's fiancée decided to back out to their wedding day. Have you witness one? Have you encountered a certain feeling from where you feel like settling down is not meant for you and you should back out?
3 responses
• United States
4 Jan 11
I am terrified of being cheated on. This is why I have been so easy to back out of relationships in the past. I recently moved in with my friend. I still have my apt and plan to keep it. My daughter is there and I visit. I love waking up everyday with him next to me. The way I feel about being here kind of scares me . I have no intentions on leaving either.this is just wonderful to start the new year like this.
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
4 Jan 11
Why would it scare you if you don't mind me asking?
• United States
5 Jan 11
because my ex cheated on me and had a child a month after I had our daughter. another boyfrend cheated on me and had a girl calling me telling me he had aids. another one cheated on me with the girl across the street and when I confronted him he almost killed me. I can go on for days. I am now living with my ex who is my friend and we are dating and I still have my apartment where my daughter is staying. I am just scared to lose it all again. Even though this guy is so not like the rest.
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
6 Jan 11
Now, I understand why. If I were in your situation, I'd do the same thing as what you did. I never thought boys tend to be so cruel on you. Did it ever cross your mind why? Maybe, you picked wrong guys. Just maybe.
@katsmeow1213 (29044)
• United States
4 Jan 11
Well I settled down about 10 years ago.. and it was a very smooth and easy process for me. I guess that's because I was very ready for it, and so was my husband. Neither of us are the type who are afraid of commitment.. we both wanted something serious and long term. We moved in together within 2 months of dating.. we had children within our first year together, then we got married after we'd been dating and living together for 2 years. This year we'll have been married 8 years, together 10 years, have 5 kids.. and we've never seriously thought about backing out.
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
4 Jan 11
That's sweet. You both were lucky to have each other. I can't think of any feeling but to envy you guys. I think I'm so good in committing to somebody for a long period of time.
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
4 Jan 11
Oops! I have to correct myself. I mean I'm not so good in commitment.
• United States
4 Jan 11
You're just not ready for it yet. You will be, someday.
• Philippines
4 Jan 11
i fear that after marriage my husband would find someone else and have extramarital affairs or worse, he will take the family forgranted and leave us for another woman. cheating and betrayal is my worst fear.
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
5 Jan 11
Is he showing some signs already?