my decision is right? is it correct?

@kirthy (387)
India
January 8, 2011 12:40am CST
i took one decision for my life. hummmm,,,,,,,, in my home my in law s ( mother , father, brother)torturing me. mother in law always talking about my self and my family very worst, father in law also in same character. brother in law is some far. his wife is conceived. so he ask my mother in law to come there. now she is there. in our home , the pet name is roni. dog. everyday myfather in law ask me to do theses and that for that dog. but i hate dogs. even tough i m working. last night i prepared dosa. but my father in law ask me to prepare chapathi. and he is telling the flour is not so good. my husband was there. he supported me. by this time after 1 and half years my period is late. we think it may be a baby. i should be very careful. so myself and my husband decided to o out. god have to help us........
9 responses
• Philippines
8 Jan 11
hi kirthy, Congratulations for having a baby (well just be positive) you should be more careful this time. Well about your topic if your in laws did not treat you very well it is good that you decided to separate and i am glad your husband supported you , o understand that its a wife responsibility to serve her husband's family but there will always be a limitations if they are abusing you physically or verbally that is not a good thing. Hope you will be happy to your new place
@kirthy (387)
• India
25 Jan 11
yur answer makes me to cry. thank you.
• Indonesia
9 Jan 11
make a decision that you think best, do not forget to ask the opinion of the family, if ypu've made the decision you will definitely be better prepared to face anything.
@piya84 (2591)
• India
8 Jan 11
Looks like your in laws are treating you like a maid.I would not stay in such a home.
@tiffnkeat (1679)
• Singapore
8 Jan 11
God sends help through the many Lotters who have given you encouragement. Yes, congratulations on your pregnancy, and I am glad to know your husband is supportive of you. You may want to get a formal check on the pregnancy and use the reason to relieve yourself of some work, starting with the dog. With the baby confirmed, maybe their attitude may change. As for cooking, as one Lotter says, take it positively as feedback unless they are shouting at you. In any case, let your husband, their son, stand before them if defense is necessary. It won't be good for you to answer back to your in-laws. Be the dutiful wife and daugther-in-law. If the argument between your husband and his parents get too heated up, at least you can step in to play the mediator or call for time-out.
@JohnMach (556)
• Philippines
8 Jan 11
That's how it is. If you get yourself into a new round of relatives, they'll criticize and give you a bit of a hard time but that's just for starters. As times passes, it'll all settle down so just be brave and feed that dog. :)
@eurekafemme (5881)
• Philippines
8 Jan 11
Hi there, Kirthy. You did the right thing. Staying with your in-laws especially in that stressful situation is not healthy even if you aren't pregnant. The moment we got married, it is understood that we wanted to settle down and have a family of our own. Then, living with your parents or your husband's is not an option. You need to be on your own now in order for you to appreciate what a real married life is. Thus, you and your husband camn make things work without having to consider a lot of people. You'll sure going to have tough times, too, but you will do fine. As long as you two will hold on to each other . And, if there;s a baby coming indeed, it is about time that you think of your own family. Be safe and always be well. God is always with us.
• Nigeria
8 Jan 11
this is tough on you but make sure your husband is the one to decide,dont forget to make him know what you are going through.in-laws most times are pests
• Philippines
8 Jan 11
I guess, having your own home with your own privacy is the most important thing for both couples. Every couple always dream of having a separate home from their in laws but they should make sure that they could stand on their own. If you think you are going to have a baby then I guess it's better to stay away from his family whom you think stresses you. It's not good for a pregnant woman to be stress all day since it affects the baby as well. So just go on with your decision and support each other. If you fail then both of you should stand up and try to move on. Don't be scared to fall/fail because through this, you will learn to be stronger and independent. Good luck to both of you and your husband and the key to your success is to be there for each other. God Bless!
@wadabski (764)
• Philippines
8 Jan 11
I would suggest to follow your own decision because you are the one living with those decision for the rest of your life. Your parents may have good suggestions of decision making but in the end you are the one who will make them to actions. You may not love the decisions suggested by others and may not do them well