Facebook & children

India
February 5, 2011 4:40am CST
I am talking about the children above 9-10 and below 17. Wherever I go among a group of few children aged average 10-12, they are well versed with facebook and got a lot to talk about it. Out of 10 children, 8 of them having a facebook account and they are very regular in that. What you have to tell about this. Does it make good or bad? I just over heard a discussion of few children talking about in detail - "I uploaded my favourite hero's photo, I have given a US (fake) address, I mentioned 20 as my age, etc...... Is any of the parents aware of it? And should we promote our children in such a way? Does anyone (even facebook) bothered of such things happening around? Does it will affect them any way? - your views...
8 people like this
22 responses
@thesids (22455)
• Bhubaneswar, India
5 Feb 11
Hi Thanks, There is no way you can keep an eye on what your kid is doing on the Internet. The ways are there but no one seems to be aware - the net nanny, the IP Blockers but then, if you do it there is always the cyber cafe available @ 10.00 INR per hour! Also, these days, if we look at the education, the use of Computer starts from class III here but they just dont mention that there are ill effects of using computers, playing games on these computers and also stuff like FB - they say that the kids are too young to understand. Isnt this like handing out a burning log of wood without mentioning to them that this is fire and you should be careful while playing with it? I think we have failed to restrict ourselves and be a better parent just because we have no time for our kids and so these kids hang out on FB or other things on the Internet... Luckily you have just met kids playing scam on FB... I have met and seen quite a few who are much beyond that...
@Jotomy (6076)
• India
5 Feb 11
Hi anna, yes what you said is correct.
• India
5 Feb 11
Hi Sid/Jo, It is that what we can do, we will do. Both my children (girl of 12 and boy of 15) have their own facebook accounts. When they demanded, I in my presence only both of them created it. They have their own school friends and some of our relatives also. I have given timings for them and they will use them at their allocated times. Both are good (not because of my children) and they never tried or attempted to any unwanted operations on the sites. As I said earlier, it is Internet any danger zone can appear at any moment of time and that would be sufficient enough for them to change their thinkings. I made some habits like whenever we use the computer with net connection, we all will be around. I will give so much of prior information for them where they can move to better site links. Educational and informative sites, readings and so and so. So, silently I have observed their moves and found they are in the right track. Also, I know their id names and passwords. So that at any time, I can check their sites and they will open their sites alongwith me only. Also, I keep giving enthusiastic and promotive guidelines so that they will think it is good. Also, the interaction with other children and discussion on the topic would make corruption. But I also become like a good friend a open companion with them. They always consider me as their best friend, then comes father. So this relationship make hope on them and me also. Only thing is that we will be in our hands only for few more year and they will look out for their own ways. But still, it is needed our support as much as we can. Why I said all, we can get our children as our own children upto a certain time only. So, till we have them around as sweet hearts, feel them as sweet hearts only and do anything for it and it would be a pleasure for ever. Thank-s
@thesids (22455)
• Bhubaneswar, India
5 Feb 11
That is so very great of you thanks... I admire you more now. It is good that we know something about computers and can guide our children... But that is just one drop in the ocean... because there are many more parents who are either having zero knowledge of computers or internet and also if they have they dont have the time...
@Sreekala (18782)
• India
5 Feb 11
Hello thanks, I don’t have a facebook account so I don’t know much about what is going on in this site. I think parents should watch over their children when they sit with computer and make restrictions for using the social sites. It can invite many dangers as many are getting cheated. I think the precaution is better always.
@Sreekala (18782)
• India
5 Feb 11
Viji, Which is????????
@Sreekala (18782)
• India
5 Feb 11
Oh ok
@Jotomy (6076)
• India
5 Feb 11
Hi sreekala, it is better not to have account in face book, see one thing i want to tell you, may be face book is started to have good interaction with the relatives, family members and with the friends who are away from us. But now it become some thing else, but as far as i am concerned what i feel is it is a good one so use it good things why they are spoiling the reputation of such sites also. Have a nice day.
2 people like this
@Jotomy (6076)
• India
5 Feb 11
Hi anna, yes, most of the children are having computers because they have a subject to learn and parents are also buying for them but because of the net most of the children getting spoiled specially with face book, what not they are doing we can't imagine in such a small age. And most of the parents are working, no one will be there to guide them or watch them because of the nuclear families. This is also one of the disadvantage. So many sad stories i heard because of the face book. But it is also can gain knowledge improve their mental abilities if they use it in a proper way. Anything anna, there are good and bad sides so what we choose that depends, the result will be like that. Have a nice day anna.
1 person likes this
@thesids (22455)
• Bhubaneswar, India
5 Feb 11
Hi Akka, what we choose that depends, the result will be like that. That is so very true. I wish that the kids get the knowledge of what is good and what is bad the moment they start learning the computers - the parents and teachers must play their roles effectively and morally
• India
5 Feb 11
Hi Jo/Sid, Yes, I always used to say, we got all around, but our choice is the MASTER here. How we shape our things are important. If we are provided with apple, grapes, bananas, oranges, apricots, etc. and ask to take any one you like - of course, we got choice but can't take all. So we will decide which one has more utility - more useful - costlier - rare - etc and finally our judgement will finger to one of them. If asked, we have our own reasons for the choice. Give our children with the right choice among the many but all are useful. If properly guided and instructed, we can bring them with bright future. facebook also a good idea and developed with so many things in mind. But if not properly used, then whom we will blame. Greece is good in the engine parts of a vehicle. But if it applied on our body or shirt, it is completely useless. So, this is the system we should adopt. Always go for the best choice with appropriately needed. If we guide our children with love and affection, I think we can bring them in to a happy future. Thank-s
@Jotomy (6076)
• India
5 Feb 11
Yes, we have to give them a happy future and we should ask them to choose their to be happy forever the way they want to choose. If they choose a right thing sure they will be happy life good future otherwise they have to repent for every single thing. But as a parents we much show them and guide them by reading the incidents happening to a particular thing or if possible we must show them in the television news etc.,
@visavis (5945)
• Philippines
5 Feb 11
Almost 3 years now joine in facebook a lot of things advantages but also have dis-advantages. One of my friend requested to me to accept his son a friend or add to my friend list, before I do that, I asked how old your son, he said 4 years old - what? for what purpose you want to have facebook account, just for fund. Is this correct? Even blind can say no because what to do in face for such age? see you around
• India
5 Feb 11
Yes, that is is. Age matters. But who should be responsible for it. Someone grownup. When we are careless of such things, these all are happening. We have police and law and order, why? Definitely maintain law and order, who breaks, they will handle them. Here also, we should act as cops and if required, implement our own order which in turn should make them to correct. Whey marriage is not allowed at the age of 15 or 16? They are matured enough to lead a settled life and that is why the age is restricted 18 or above. The same way, an age has its own influence on certain areas and we should think a 4-5 years child is really in need of it. Ok, if I got an account I can create i the name of my child and I can operate and do things for fun. But if the children handling the site own way should be controlled or observed. Thank you for your comments. Thank-s
@tiffnkeat (1679)
• Singapore
5 Feb 11
It is important for parents to be involved with the children. However, this is becoming more difficult as teens want to assert their individuality. While it is good children are more tech-savvy, they are still lacking in terms of being discerning. This is a sad fact that schools are not paying enough attention to this area of education. To teach them wisdom, and wisdom comes from knowing the word of God. Personally, I don't want to face book. I have no face...haha... and I won't want to impersonate as someone unless you are trying to teach your own children about the perils of FB.
1 person likes this
• India
5 Feb 11
Hi dear, Some time I used to think that we are thinking many things from our perspective and not in line with the new generation. Some time earlier, even we must have told or though of our parent also with the same. May be termed as generation gap or whatever, but a mistake is always mistake and to be corrected whenever and who ever does it. I think the new gen. children are much advance and they are one step ahead of us. Ok, but whenever their demands go beyond the limit, we also would think of the same. However, while we finding the fault with our education system, the practical difficulties are very much awere to the concerned people. But they don't want to take the burden on their shoulders because the children are of not theirs, and they want money. So, how it will get improved? I think within our limits, whatever we can do, we does - that is all. Thank-s
@cream97 (29175)
• United States
16 Feb 11
Hi. thanks1961. I know a few children that are on facebook. My niece is on it. She is nine years old. And, my nephew, by marriage is on it too. I think that he is about 13 or 14 years old though. I think that my sister should not have let her opened up a facebook account, it could be too risky. So, since that is her child, I will stay out of that, if you know what I mean. I know that I would not let my kids open up an account until they are a mature teenager.
• India
16 Feb 11
Hi dear, If the children are good enough to understand the matter, we can make them understand and the consequences can be minimised. But certain children mostly prefer to do such things privately and they always enjoy the privacy while sitting on Internet. All what we can do is that make them understand and ask them to observe what we all are doing. Also, make them habituated more with educational and such similar sites and by doing so, their interest will way forward to such disciplined sites. Thank-s
• India
17 Feb 11
Hi dear, Yes, I understood. By not having an account for a child is not going to lose anything, but having an account may lead to unwanted troubles. I am not telling that having an account of facebook is so dangerous or anything like, but for a child of 8-10-12 years is not at all required it independently. However if they are using it under the supervention of parents or guardians, it is ok, but still not so advisable. Once they are upto the age to enjoy the same, we can recommend but for the child ages, it is better to have registered with some educational sites or sites which are meant for children are good and they will really enjoy also. But if they are full versed with facebook and the like, they may not find any fun in the sites that are really meant for them. Thank-s
@SViswan (12095)
• India
13 Feb 11
My 10 year old is not allowed to have a facebook account even though most of his friends do. A few of them have lied about their age in there. A few of the parents are aware that the kids have an account. One of my friend's sons is on Facebook...he is 13 now. She was against it but the father allowed it. So, she requested me to add her son as a friend (he is my son's best friend too) and keep an eye on him...which I do. I think Facebook allows children above 13 to have an account. But this boy's younger brother who is now 9 also has an account. When my son first got to know about their accounts and questioned them about how they could get an account when they aren't 13 yet, they gave him detailed instructions on how he could lie about his age and get an account. My son's computer usuage is always monitored and when he does want to play a few games on Facebook, he can do so in my account after I have opened it for him. He is also given a time limit and I am usually around doing some work when he does it.
• India
17 Feb 11
Hi dear, Yes, the restricted way of using such accounts are ok and we can allow them to enjoy the same for a limited period. The computer literacy and knowledge also will increase. As compared to some other social sites, facebook has a universal identity and they motivated with the common usage. It directly does not implicated any bad habits or such things, but by moving through the sites and link connections would end up with various unwanted visits and which needs to be controlled. Always, preferred that whenever children are using computer with internet, our observation on them will be helpful in various aspects. Thanks for your comments and best regards. Thank-s
@SViswan (12095)
• India
17 Feb 11
Though ....as you say....Facebook has a universal identity, there are lots of things in there that pop up on my profile (thanks to links or applications a few friends of mine use) that I don't want to expose my son to right now. I know I can't protect him forever but I'd prefer to put a lot of bad things that he will be exposed to anyways to a few years later when he will be capable of choosing right and wrong...or what he needs to do without going against his values and principles. He knows how to use the computer and the internet for what he needs.....but that can also lead to lots of harmful sites (both for the computer as well as my child) and I prefer being around when he is on the net. I'm thinking of getting a laptop for him without a net connection. A pendrive may be used to transfer data that he needs for his lessons....but the PC remains in the living room where it is in full view of the adults when the kids use it. My son has an account in Club Penguin which is for kids. I like the fact that they need parent permission to join and I am updated of new things that come up and I can access his account even if he has a password of his own.
@MsTickle (24957)
• Australia
16 Feb 11
My 13 year old granddaughter has an account and she is on there constantly either via her mobile phone or her home computer. She refuses to go to school or do as her Mum tells her. Most of her FB "friends" are school kids and they tell her she's crazy to behave as she does but she doesn't care. She lives her life through Facebook. The worrying part is that she has over 2000 friends and accepts anyone who asks.
• India
17 Feb 11
Hi dear, Though looks strange, looks so cute when thinking about it. Once children got more on it, they would really enjoy to get involved in it and that is the reason why they need to spend more time on it. Also, in their world, it is one of the joyful time and other kind of playing and time pass are occupied with facebook for many children like your grandchild. I know she is really enjoying it and please note that she would be concentrating on the studies as well. Thank-s
• Philippines
8 Feb 11
Children nowadays are well versed with computers more so in using the net. That is why it is the responsibility of parents to monitor their children and teach them that there are advantages as well as disadvantages when using the internet. It is good if you can monitor all the sites they viewed but then with the presence of internet cafes, we can never tell what sites they opened. So we are not really sure if they have facebook, friendster, twitter or other accounts in various social network sites especially that some of them might be using other names or aliases just to stay anonymous. We just hope children won't be misled.
• India
17 Feb 11
Hi dear, When children learning to use internet, if we give the proper guidance and advice they will rightly motivated and at the initial time more care is required. Once they are in the correct track, they will move as per our instructions. But if they are not at all motivated the way how they should do, possibilities are there they would get spoiled. A right time interference and guidance can move them to the correct direction and which will make them more into the appropriate sites and informative sites than just wasting time with unwanted sites. Thank-s
@Sanitary (3969)
• Singapore
8 Feb 11
IT's not just about facebook, but some other sites as well. They know the tricks to survive online and children are getting smarter in the wrong way. Children doesn't like parents to be on facebook, especially adding them as friends. That's one reason why some children are smart enough to create multiple accounts while one of them is a fake one. Just like online chatting, many underage children are faking their age, just to be legal.
• India
16 Feb 11
Hi dear, You studied the youngster's mind and it is true. They will do whatever they want to be safe from others. Visibly they will act smart and they would move around the way they like in the absence of others. We should not promote such tendency. But all such habits are emerges when they are more interacted with other children and they are ones leading their role nicely. But if the children have a good conduct with their parent, they would still try to be coop with their parents in the way they preferred. Thank-s
1 person likes this
@adhyz82 (36289)
• Indonesia
6 Feb 11
i think it`s not good...but we must see case per case..as overll, i dont think facebook can give a good effect for children.. but maybe for one or two children, facebook can give them many informtion... but parents must be careful.. parents must be the first person who know whats his pr her children open in virtual worlds or whats his kis friend in fcebook...
• India
16 Feb 11
Hi dear, Surely, there are a lots of things around. The parents to manage the children properly where as they can control them with preferred direction and guide them what to do and what not to do as per the age. Here it is a fact that we cannot reach our attention at all time with the children but making them about the facts and proper awareness can help to minimise the effects on children. Thanks for your comments. Thank-s
@34momma (13918)
• United States
5 Feb 11
i don't know how good or bad it is. i don't know if i would allow my little girl to have any social networking account until she is about 14 years old.
• India
6 Feb 11
Hi dear, There is nothing to worry on this. I was just thinking how advanced we are now. Even the children are moving alongwith the time and culture. It is only mentioned that while they are going up, we need to look upon them that they are in the right track. Thanks for the comments. Thank-s
• Mexico
5 Feb 11
Hi thanks: I understand your question and I think that parents should care about what kind of pages their children are surfing on the internet because you can't trust on the intentions of the other persons and at the same time, there's a lot of inappropiated content on the web. However I don't consider that it would be a good option to tell your kids that they can't open a Facebook account because they won't feel good with your attitude and maybe they'll try to make their own investigations when you can't watch them. So basically, I think it's better to talk openly to your children so they'll feel confident and maybe to be with him/her while he/she's surfing on the net. ALVARO
• India
5 Feb 11
Hi dear, You are right. Make them understand alongwith learning. It will imprint in their minds what is good and what not. A proper guidance and better awareness among the children can eliminate their unwanted doubts and if we guide them properly they will come up with better understanding. In the modern world children need their own freedom and choice. But our sole duty is to guide properly and if we do it properly, both parent and child will be winners in this life game. Nice to here you again and than you for your valid comments. Thank-s
@shaggin (25105)
• United States
5 Feb 11
I do not think I will allow my kids that young to be on facebook. If you have to be a certain age to join a site then you wait until you are that age to join. A lot of people make facebook pages for their kids so they can play the games. I will not be doing that. I get friend requests from people who are under 18 and I wont approve them. I usually send them a private message telling them that due to the fact that I write some adult things on my facebook sometimes that I dont approve anyone who isnt 18 or older.
• India
5 Feb 11
Kids are always so slender minded and it is easy to get involved into anything, if they are not properly guided. Such inspiration also gets into their hands mainly due the friendship company and others. We should be always watchful on them to check that whether they are on the right tracks. I think comparatively, girl children are more addicted to facebook than boys. However, a right supervision on them can be bring them to normal and with an understanding way. Thanks for the comments. Thank-s
@maezee (26613)
• United States
5 Feb 11
I would NOT want my kids to have a Facebook, especially at such a young age - like 8 or 10. No wayyy. It's so dangerous if you think about it, especially with kids being naive and all. MAYBE when they turn 14 or 15 I can understand it (although I would still keep an eye on them). I am glad I don't have kids at this point so I don't have to deal with this kind of thing.
• India
5 Feb 11
Hi dear, Thanks for your comments. We should not give that much freedom to children with Internet. As per their age, there need certain restrictions. Computer learning and literacy is mandatory by using of websites independently would lead to unwanted results. As the life is more connected to computers and children are well aware that parents are mostly addicted to computers and it is happening in front of them also. So, they will spot such a life pattern in their life also. So, the best way is to make them well aware of the the same and be always around or sit with them whenever we give them computers with Internet. Also we can guide them with child and informative sites which are suited for their age and knowledge. If so, they will really enjoy them and only thing, we should around them as a guide. Thank-s
@dong88 (796)
• China
5 Feb 11
Hello! I think the children early contact social website,is not a good thing.Main is easily absorbed in,waste a lot of time,thus influence their learning and growth.
• India
5 Feb 11
Hi dear, Yes, to an extent it is correct. If we try from the bigging with a systematic way of teaching and giving them proper advice and instructions perhaps they will get guided by the proper way of learning. But most of the cases, it does not happen. This is the main reason why children are going the way how they feel. If we guide them at their respective age period with information what they needed, they will move towards its right track. Also, after a time limit, there wont be any advantage also from this. However, to an extent, I think the proper guidance can make some results. Thank-s
1 person likes this
@aerous (13475)
• Philippines
6 Feb 11
I don't see any trouble for children using facebook. Because as far as I know they are much engage in playing online game there?
• Philippines
6 Feb 11
Parents must always guide their children in all dealings in the Internet. There are so many "evil" sites there. Also, there are many posers in Facebook and many people were tricked by these people and extorted a lot of money from unsuspecting Facebook users. Also, those things that the children are doing should be known by the parents because what they are doing have negative impacts on their behavior when they grow up.
@zweeb82 (5744)
• Malaysia
6 Feb 11
Well, we have from our place even parent creating a Facebook account for their few months old to load up their photos? Tell me about that, haha!~
• Philippines
6 Feb 11
My boyfriend's son has a facebook account, and he's only 8. Sometimes he uses languages that are not appropriate, and we always tell him that it's not good. The sad thing is we are having a hard time controlling his internet usage because he lives with his mom during weekdays, and they allow him to use the internet all day. I always tell my boyfriend, that when we have our own kids, facebook will not be allowed until they are atleast highschool, and I would not tolerate it if they have bad grades. Parents needs to be more proactive when it comes to internet usage of their kids..