children as investment
February 6, 2011 7:34am CST
I was disturbed recently when I heard my neighborhood nagging and says nasty things to her children. She is a mother with seven children, all of them already have their own family. I heard her say to them, "You forget how i suffered just to raise you! You still have an obligation to follow and do what i tell you even if you already have your own family. I am still your mother and you owe me your entire life. You must give back what I did for you." I feel sad about this, because I am a mother too, but I am not favorable with what she said. I don't believe we raise children so that one day we will force them to pay what we did for them. Besides, it's not their choice that we became their parents. It's our responsibility as worthy care-takers to nourish those lives lent to us by our Creator. Why there are parents who look at their children as merely investments?
2 people like this
7 Feb 11
I can relate w/ that, it is a common scenario here in the Philippines. Since some areas here and most of the families are living in poverty.. they rely on their children and sort of oblige them to give them a good life when they grow up. Some parents would like to relive their dreams and wanted their children to have the life that they've always wanted but they failed to have. So maybe that is why there are those types of parents that has this kind of mindset.
• United States
6 Feb 11
It's very sad to hear that these types of things are said to children. I do think we deserve respect as parents,but not this "eternal control" over our kids. That will destroy trust and cause great division istead of bringing everyone together.
• Cambridge, England
6 Feb 11
We never know how much our parents suffered in order to bring us up. Just the fact that we, too, suffer to bring up our own children is enough and according to the principles of "Paying it Forward". To make anyone feel guilty because you have freely given what it was only your duty to give is selfish and un-Christian.
6 Feb 11
I agree with you totally on this one. As a mother, and as a daughter. Yes, I do feel obligated to take care of my mother (not that she needed me or expect me to), but I will never force my children to take care of me. A friend of mine has given me an advice when I had my first daughter; I think it sums up what we, as parents need to do, and where our responsibilty lies. He said, and I quote, "Our responsibility is to raise them up to be a good human being. Not to coddle them and provide them food. We are not just food provider, we need to prepare our children so that they can face the world on their own". It is a big responsibility being just a parent, let alone a good one. All we can do is try our best.