Revenge as a motivation for success

be successful to get even - get even when successful
@bounce58 (17524)
Canada
February 8, 2011 5:40pm CST
Have you ever thought of becoming successful to spite off someone? I know that this more common in movies, where the star would get beaten up and the only way to get revenge from his/her oppressors is to be successful themselves. Because there is no way the villains can stand seeing the star become successful. In a small measure, I’ve had such experience. When I started working in the industry I was in, I came through the back door. I started out as a shipper/receiver. Something that the operators and mechanics didn’t quite think was up to their level. There was this one particular mechanic who’s always given me a hard time. He always ticked me off, but I had no choice because I needed to get into this industry and I didn’t want anything that would cause me my job. Now fast forward a few years, I’ve since then moved to the office. And have control of what people do on the floor. Although I don’t go out of my way to cause trouble for that mechanics, it gives me some satisfaction to know that it irks him a bit that I am higher in the ‘food chain’ now. Have you ever had to go through a similar experience? Can you use revenge to motivate you to become successful? Is it in you to harbor ill-feelings and use it to drive you to become better?
6 people like this
17 responses
@maezee (34019)
• United States
9 Feb 11
Totally! Maybe not in the sense of "revenge" but there's nothing wrong with seeking success just to "prove 'em wrong", you know? Your story is inspirational - really! I mean - I bet that mechanic, if he's still there.. is thinking, damn, what do you know! A lot of things are like this with me... School, jobs, debt... Every time I hear discouragement or DOUBT directed towards me and what I'm doing with my life..It's fuel for the fire, really, and just motivates me more to prove them wrong.
2 people like this
• United States
9 Feb 11
Had to say I loved your response! I had to smile thinking of that "fuel for the fire" burning inside of me, motivating me to attain that which I desire.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
12 Feb 11
Hi maezee. There is nothing really that 'fuels the fire' for me than a point that I'd like to prove. I could be stubborn that way. And if that process makes me improve, then I don't mind doing it. The end would justify the means. Thanks.
@KrauseHome (35514)
• United States
11 Feb 11
Personally I can really relate with this, as it is something I have been experiencing a lot lately and instead of allowing it to get me down my attitude and thought process has been "I'll show them". I presently work as a Dispatcher aka Call Taker for a cab company where I have been for almost 5 yrs. I never get any self respect from a lot of the call takers, and the Boss and many of the people who have been there less time than me make at least what I do or more, and when I confront the Boss about it, he acts like no one is making more than me, or it should be none of his business. And then I also recently got my Business license again and tried having a small store out of a place that rents to Small Businesses. Personally this guy was in it for himself and no one else. I never really made any money there, and it got to the point because I was making no money when he gave me the option to break my lease and not have to pay him anymore $$ I took it. Then he said I was dreaming if I ever thought I would be successful with what I am doing. To make a long story short, I just had someone contact me about wanting me to do Business with them which I am in the process of talking with them and looking into it which could be a Big break for sure. All I can say is now I have the "I'll show them" attitude and willing to fight to get it.
1 person likes this
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
12 Feb 11
It sounds like you're on your way to an excellent adventure. And as long as you make these feelings fuel you to be successful, I think you can do anything. Including 'showing' this guy off at how wrong he is. Goodluck to you! I do hope that this turns out to be a big break. Maybe even enough to leave the call taker job(?)!
2 people like this
@KrauseHome (35514)
• United States
12 Feb 11
That is definately my Goal and plan as I surely would rather be in Business for myself than someone else especially since I had to go to all of the trouble to get my Business license, etc.
1 person likes this
• Australia
4 Jun 11
I dont think i could strive enough from someones disappointment to use it to succeed either, i think succuss is driven by love by passion my fullfillment. To truly be successful you need to let go of hate and the people that inspire the feeling in your life. Move yourself out of the situation that makes your hate thrive and into a situation where you feel loved and in control.
1 person likes this
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
7 Jun 11
I think you are in a better place than I am! If you can let go of all of the negative feelings, then I think success would be better appreciated. I wish everybody would be like that. Thanks for the response.
@hdc4free (264)
• United States
9 Feb 11
Well it may not be noble but I have definitely been motivated by feeling angry towards a few people in my past, and the desire to show them I could do better than they thought I would is a POWERFUL motivator! I suppose it would be better to be successful without feeling angry at anyone, but it's a good thing to make something productive and good from anger rather than just wallow in it and feel bad.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
12 Feb 11
I think you clearly got my point hdc4free. Like you said, it would be most ideal to be better and be successful cleanly, and without being angry at anyone. But you can't also deny that anger is really is a powerful motivator. So, if you can harness it for your own betterment, then I think it's OK. Thanks.
• United States
9 Feb 11
No. To me that just sounds like someone taking a movie into putting it into real life. Life isn't two hours long and isn't written for views. Life is meant to be pure and positively joyful in every moment. Hating someone or looking to get revenge is a weak mind set in my opinion. Why do they matter in your life? I would just focus on what makes you happy and makes you feel good independent of others actions or beliefs.
1 person likes this
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
11 Feb 11
Great response meditated1. If a person were to examine one's self, other people's opinions shouldn't concern him or her. Even if those other people hurt that person. And yes, life tends to go on and on. Even if one would be successful now, we still wouldn't know what will happen down the road. Thanks.
• Philippines
9 Feb 11
Your story makes me smile because I know how it feels like to be in your place where you're being undermined. But then again, there are days where you're the hydrant. And days where you're the dog. Life's a cycle and I try to understand its process. I also had my fair share of outwitting someone. I was not one of the good ones during our training and she, on the other hand, has more experience. Then there's this one activity where we're all required to do something. Unfortunately, she picked me out among the rest. I don't know why but some of the trainees, who became my friends, told me that she doesn't like me at all and was always talking something against me. I never understood why because I know I didn't do anything towards her. Then our big examination came. She was very confident at that time that she'll be the top in our training since she has the edge to make it. But she didn't make it. I did. I don't use revenge to be a motivation in order to out win someone. But if that's the only way it could make that person realize and make him/her humble. Then I shall do it. We have different views in life. And I know we always do what we think is right. Congratulations on your success, Bounce. I am positive you bounced it well. =)
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
12 Feb 11
We have different views in life. And I know we always do what we think is right. I think that even if we have different views in life, like how we use revenge as motivation, as long as we don't lose sight of what is wrong and what is right, I think it is OK. Like being stubborn to prove a point, while in the process making yourself improve. As long as you don't cross the line, then I think the end justifies the means.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
12 Feb 11
And thanks for the response. Did you top her on the big examination?
• United States
9 Feb 11
No I am vengeful but has nothing to do with work. I have never had that " I'll show them" mentality. I rather just wish them ill and if I get the chance to really hurt an enemy Anyway I can but I Never thought i Had to better myself to do it. I guess is what happens when you don't see what you are but Who you are. My job isn't and never will be Who I am. It is just what I do , period. So if an enemy sees me as nothing , that is their problem , not mine. In fact it is better for them to Think I can't hurt them. It will hurt doubly when they find out this " nothing" is the one causing all the harm.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
12 Feb 11
Hehe, I think you're operating at a totally different level Sarah. But, I could be that way too. I could also assume to make others think that I am 'nothing'. Yet behind the scenes needling them and causing them grief, in turn for maligning me. That's just me.
1 person likes this
• United States
12 Feb 11
• Oman
9 Feb 11
I never find revenge as a motivation for one to succeed in life. After all, the ends can never ever justify the means. Instead I see it the other way around. If one thinks of revenging, he must not attempt to do it at all. Instead, he must find himself challenged to work for the good in achieving one's goals and aspirations in life. Sooner or later the one whom you were supposed to avenge will realize the difference that you have made and your foot steps will soon be observed and followed. Biblically, when one slaps us on the left side of the face we must offer the right as well. If some one throws us a stone, may we retaliate by throwing bread. It doesn't sound insulting rather edifying and emulating the values and virtues which God has left for us to portray among fellows of this world.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
12 Feb 11
Hello madp_071983. I know that it may not be the greatest of intentions to use revenge as motivation, but since it is a powerful drive, I think I could just harness it to make myself successful quicker. And as long as I don't cross the line, like hurting other people, I think it could be beneficial for me. Thanks for the response, and welcome to myLot.
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
9 Feb 11
Hm, layoff 2001 in which my boss told me that there was work on other systems in the company, but it would be too much of a learning curve. So I went and got another job and moved from: mortgage banking to health insurance an AS400 system to a VMS system And learned it and managed to do quite well, thank you very much. :D
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
12 Feb 11
I wonder what your former boss thought had he'd known about you chewing up and spitting out that learning curve. If I were in your shoes, I would have made sure that I was really successul and flaunt it in front of him.
@unme9090 (55)
• Malaysia
9 Feb 11
My motivation huh? there's only one motivation in my heart.. It's to become her only "prefect boyfriend" I've done a lot of things but she keep hurting me, I love her but...that's the only motivation I have.. Good luck on yours.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
12 Feb 11
Hello unme9090. I'm not sure, but maybe you're just a hopeless romantic. Your motivation maybe noble, but I hope that it doesn't have any negative effects on yourself. Thanks for the response.
@sender621 (14956)
• United States
9 Feb 11
I can't see revenge as a good moitivator for success. Success should come with achievements. It shouldn't come out of anger and resentment. Sometimes revenge can give us a push in a direction where we did not want to go.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
12 Feb 11
I totally agree that revenge can sometimes push you towards unwanted direction. But that's if you let your grudge eat at you. Hopefully I didn't. That I just used it to be more successful and to 'show' that mechanic that he didn't really knew me at all. Thanks.
@katsmeow1213 (29044)
• United States
9 Feb 11
Typically I tend to forget about any type of revenge plots a few days after any incident. Though, yes, there are a few people who told me I'd never amount to anything.. or something similar.. and I do feel I've succeeded in proving them wrong. Though I haven't done what I've done in order to prove anyone wrong.. I've done it because it's what I wanted.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
12 Feb 11
I think that's a more noble thought. But I think that comes with a realization of what you really want. And hopefully, other people's opinion of you didn't factor in. Ideally, that should be the way. But sometimes you can't help it if other people define 'your wants' for you. Thanks.
• United States
9 Feb 11
Better myself in spite of it all or the odds or the naysayers? Heck yes! I wouldn't call it revenge, I'd call it avenged. You worked your way onward and upward, and as long as you don't hold onto the grudge, all should be fine. Good for you making it!
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
12 Feb 11
avenged! I think that is a better word. I think that the moment I could see that the other person(mechanic) sees my success, is the moment I let go of the grudge. Thanks, and thank you too for the response.
@DYAMIGA (64)
• Philippines
9 Feb 11
sometimes its how you see work thet would make it say revenge for some. me? i see it as competition and that i need to win foe he .she is my opponent by then its not revenge but FAIR GAME.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
11 Feb 11
Hello DYAMIGA. In some way, it is a competition. The mere fact that I want to make sure that I become successful, be it as a form of revenge, is competition for me too. Thanks.
@rsa101 (16235)
• Quezon City, Philippines
9 Feb 11
Never tried that on myself and I have never experienced that in my life. But I guess for as long as you never malign others when you reached the top then there is nothing wrong with that. Motivation whether positive or negative will not influence the outcome. Try to be positive always and despite the negativity of the motivation never used it against or it might just bounce back to you twice.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
11 Feb 11
I really have no intentions of maligning anybody. I think it is more for my own satisfaction. That the other guy could be seething, just because I am enjoying a little bit of success. It could just be a fantasy, but if it gets me there, I might as well use it. But you're right. It would be better if it were positive energy that drives you to success, but I'm just not sure that I'll get the same determination.
• United States
9 Feb 11
I do not think I can use revenge to motivate me to become successful, as I rather be successful due to my talents, hard work and dedication. I put forth a great deal of passion in anything and everything I do as I want to be remembered as a caring and passionate person more so then trying to prove a point.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
11 Feb 11
I guess this is where I would differ from you. I am a bit stubborn (I think I even raised a discussion about this), that I could go to the ends of whatever, if I wanted to prove a point. And I think if that point would make me successful, then I would certainly go for it. You are a much better person than me hardworkinggurl!
• Indonesia
9 Feb 11
according to my mind, use revenge as your motivator is the best way than you use it to injure someone. I think revenge is base and nature of human. It depends on everyone how to manage it.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
11 Feb 11
Hello silvalestari. I think so too. Although you would be operating on revenge, you are actually just making yourself better. And not trying to injure anyone. Thanks for the response.