How do you deal with jealousy?

Philippines
February 27, 2011 5:38am CST
Even if we act the toughest all the time, we, at one point in our lives have become jealous. If you are in a relationship, jealousy is really a part of the two of you. And if you don't act on it, it might destroy what you have. We have different ways in dealing with these issues, some are silent, some are not. How do you deal with yours?
2 people like this
15 responses
@sender621 (14956)
• United States
27 Feb 11
Jealousy can make us a person we don't want to be. Feelings and emotions from a jealous conditions can take us places we don't want to go. Jealousy can leave you feeling bitter and resentful. Jealousy that controls your heart and your mind can destroy any relationship you have. Getting past the jealous feelings are not always easy, but whatever you can do to erase feelings of jealousy will be well worth the effort.
• Philippines
27 Feb 11
it's really hard coping because you are hurting. Sometimes it's really hard to move on especially if the issue remains unsettled in your heart, it will keep on bugging your mind.
@artistry (4154)
• United States
27 Feb 11
...Hi there j0anne13, Welcome to the ranch, enjoy yourself. If you are in a relationship the first thing I think you need to avoid jealousy is a sense of security in that relationship. By that I mean that the two of you are committed to one another and are communicationing whatever problem might be bothering you with the relationship if there is one. There must also be a serious caring for each other that lets the other know that each of you are there for each other. If these things in my opinion are present in a relationship then the relationship should be able to weather any jealous emotions. If however one individual is insecure emotionally in the relationship and feels threatened by another person and there is no bond between the two people there will be a problem that knaws until there is a discussion about the issue and it is resolved. A good foundation is necessary for any relationship to survive. If an individual has inherant jealously problems they need to build up their self-esteem and reduce their personal insecurities. Take care.
@artistry (4154)
• United States
27 Feb 11
..correction....communicating ....not...Sorry "o)
• Oman
27 Feb 11
I face jealousy with open arms. At the onset of feeling jealousy, I ready my self by allowing multiple questions to sink in my thoughts such as, "Am I prepared to face this?", "What actions will I display?", "Whom shall I please?", "Am I wiling to bear the consequences?" among some. After all, its either you're gonna make it or break it. For some, jealousy is a sign of immaturity but I see it differently, it is a manifestation that you really love her. In the long run, it won't make me less of a lover though.
• Philippines
28 Feb 11
i totally agree with you....
• United States
27 Feb 11
I deal with this everyday with adrian. he does not want me around other men because of the pain he was dealt in the past. I think in the long run it is tearing us apart. he says things to upset me all the time. Like I will say I am going outside and he will say don't be around any men. Or he will say you just going tricking. then he will catch himself and say sorry.
• Philippines
27 Feb 11
tell him to trust you. and you should act that he can trust you.and be open to each other.
@QeeGood (1214)
• Sweden
27 Feb 11
Why be jealous? I'm never jealous. I've never been. Are you in a relationship you are together by your own free will hopefully. We are individual who are responsible for our own actions with reciprocal respect and acceptance. When someone win the lottery I have discovered that people get jealous on the winner. Why be jealous? I'm happy for the one who won. I give my best congratulations. I can see things I would like to have. still I can be happy together with the person who has it. I think I will have it one day or it was not meant for me to have it. I believe people who is very jealous has a big selfish EGO. They have strong wants to always be the best no matter what the consequences are. They need to have control over people because they feel safe, when they know everything and can rule other people's lives out from their own selfish EGO. When they can not do it along with seeing that other people have something or do something that is much better or more valued than what they have the jealousy strike as a bad warewolf. People who can do altrustic gesture by giving selflessly with no expectations never get jealous. It is just to let go and move on!
• Philippines
27 Feb 11
I think jealousy is not a negative word all the time. It's a natural feeling. It's how we deal with it that it becomes negative.
@tammy27 (1247)
• Philippines
27 Feb 11
instead of yammering in front of my boyfriend, i fix myself first. try to understand things, thinking over and over again if i should really be jealous or not, and trying not be be jealous even if i know i should. and i really cant control it i talk to him, if he won't stop or avoid the thing im being jealous of, that's another story. of the many times i have been in this situation, i can say this is the best remedy. if i'll fix myself first before talking to my boyfriend, then i have an assurance that im in the right side, and that i won't act like a child in front of him. i also try to be as open minded as i could. :)
• Philippines
27 Feb 11
you're a very positive and understanding person indeed..:)
@jhaidro (879)
• Philippines
27 Feb 11
I just do not do anything with it. If she really is for me then she will not engage into things that might lead me to this feeling. I will just hope that things go the way I expect them to. If it doesn't, I guess that I should just deal with it when it comes for me.
• Philippines
27 Feb 11
what if it's unintentional? and she doesn't know that she's has made you jealous?you will just let it pass?
@didi13 (2927)
• Romania
17 Mar 11
Any person may occasionally be jealous. It means that someone you care about can sometimes be afraid of the possibility of losing the person you want. The difference between the usual form of jealousy and lies that form of pathological jealousy in "recovery" while in ordinary jealousy, jealous often realize that their suspicions are unfounded, people suffering from morbid jealousy become obsessed with their fears and seek constantly signs that will confirm that the suspicions are true. I'm glad you do not belong to any category.
@elisse27 (181)
• Philippines
28 Feb 11
I'm a very jealous person. When, I was younger, I don't hear out their explanation but now as I get mature I try to understand what happened that is how I get to deal with jealousy
@katie0 (5212)
• Japan
28 Feb 11
If they guy gives me too much of jealousy I leave him, I already did that. Now in the normal amount like they all look to girls from time to time, but in a normal way not flirting or anything and they actually stop looking when we are around I think it's okay. I even look so I cannot complain but everytime I realize I'm starring I stop, even without him. I'm a whole different person with and without someone in my life. Now when there's these little things that I can't change in him and makes me jealous, I tried already so I know it doesn't change, I avoid. I try to not look, I think in something else, I realize I'm preattier and I put my self up never down. The worst in jealoussy is how it can make us feel ugly or small, if we don't allow that we can get through.
@blue65packer (11835)
• United States
28 Feb 11
The best way for me to deal with jealousy is just to let time take its course. I learnt years ago that friends,especially girlfriends,weren't any help! They were rude and uncaring about my jealousy probelm! The guys were not very helpful either! So I just dealt with it by myself! Time was the only thing that workes! Now I can deal with it,still by myself,but I have it in control in no time nowadays!
@naija4real (1293)
27 Feb 11
Jealousy is a behavioural attitude of almost all human. But dealing with it the right way and in the proper manner counts you as a success.
@sunny5u (2072)
• India
27 Feb 11
Even i get jealousy wen my close pal prefers sum to share her issues rather than wit me but its just a simple thing people say but at times i do get jealous then i simply move from that place or switch off my mobile for sumtime and start listening to music of my favorite list or watch a movie which i like the most or share with sum other person whom i trust or i'l try to spend with my mom.
@AnnaDine (92)
• Denmark
27 Feb 11
When I'm jealous, I confront my boyfriend with it. Because it's typical my boyfriend I'm jealous at. It can be the way a girl looks at him, or just another girl texting him. Then I become jealous, and I confront him with it. He is very understanding because he is also very jealous at me. Now I don't need to confront him, he can see it on me, the way that I act and the way I anwser him and I can see it on him too, when he is jealous. But when my boyfriend is jealous, it don't stop me to live my life. Somebody can feel it like a stopblock, but I return it to positiv and say it because he love me, and because he don't wan't to let me go.
@mods196621 (3631)
• Philippines
27 Feb 11
You know it is hard to deal within this matter because it is an emotion. And when it comes to this we cannot hide our feelings longer. In my own experience i can't hide my feelings if i'm jealous. I get angry and really turn myself into distraction if necessary just to caught his attention. I am a very possessive woman and always jealous especially if I am not updated to his activities. On the first place I am quite but hard to breath then if this is happening that was the time that i am really shouted for revenge. It was painful if jealous attack us. How I wish to have jealousy a prevention potion.