rescue me....

Philippines
March 4, 2011 3:58am CST
Have you ever felt this way? Feeling hopeless and hapless? Because right now, I do. The house is a mess, my bathroom and cr stinks and floor is sticky. I got a basinful of dirty laundry and the dirty dishes in the sink are piling up.Worse, my two kids are all sick and I am sick, too! Amidst all these, I am still forcing myself to do what is expected of me. To clean up all the mess, cook and take care of the kids.... But, who would take care of me, too?
3 people like this
20 responses
@dpk262006 (56170)
• Delhi, India
4 Mar 11
Hi eureka! I Sympathize with you and I can understand your predicament. I think, you need to take someone's help immediately, may be any of your relatives or any of your Neighbors could be requested to come for your help. And as soon as you finish your household errands, you may go to the Doctor along with kids so that all could be treated and given medicines. I wish I could have come up there and helped you clear the mess. Keep your cool and execute the task one by one with ease.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
5 Mar 11
Hi, dear .:) I am becoming a super human. Doing everything at the same time. Just like what I've told Saphy, it is difficult to get some help here. I'm in a village wherein neighbors do not bother about other people's matters. Even to hire a helper is very difficult. As for relatives, mine are hundreds of miles away from our place... I took the kids already to the doctor and were prescribed proper medications, since no need for confinement, i have no choice but to take care of them all by myself. It is just not so comfortable feeling sick and yet the house is a mess. I must admit that i has pushed my physical capabilities to the limit... Really, dear, you'll come to give me a hand? Oh, so bad that India is a thousand miles from Philippines and that you'll be needing a visa to do that. But, I do appreciate the thought , dear.
@dpk262006 (56170)
• Delhi, India
5 Mar 11
I do hope things would be better now and you would have tackled the situation somehow. I understand in the absence of any outside help, managing the affairs on your own gets difficult. Even if I cannot be there physically, I can always wish for the same and I can offer myself for your help because I believe positive vibes affect our minds. :-) Deepak
• Philippines
5 Mar 11
So true, dear. It really helps a lot that somewhere out there is wishing me well even if he is a total stranger. Well, your friendship only shows that friendship knows no bounds when it comes to helping one another. Sigh... I'm just lucky to have you as a real good friend.
1 person likes this
@iva75cpb (729)
• Bulgaria
4 Mar 11
There are moments when you just have to look after yourself. I have felt like this many times - house upside down, dirty laundry, dishes waiting for me in the sink, daughter sick, everything a mess. And a heavy headache in addition. I usually manage to take control of the situation and do my job with the last strength I have but after that I feel exhausted and unable do to nothing more. In such cases I just drop everything and go to bed. All I need is 30 minutes to one hour lying in bed with my eyes closed. I shut down myself from the world. When I get up again I feel almost OK. Sometimes our bodies and mentality just need to be shut down for a while. If we don't help ourselves no one will. That's why I prefer just to turn my back on everything for a while to gather some strength. And start all over again. No one will send me to prison for not doing the housework for a couple of hours. I wish you happy recovery!
@iva75cpb (729)
• Bulgaria
5 Mar 11
I did my best... I'll be around if you need just to talk or any other advice. We may be strangers, but definitely MyLot is a place where we can be friends, too, no matter we haven't seen each other face to face.
• Philippines
5 Mar 11
That is so sweet of you, Iva. Yes, I do agree with you that here in Mylot we are all friends (almost) even if we haven't seen each other yet. Don't worry,dear, I'll be ok. And, your advice truly helps, though, I haven't grab a sleep earlier but after dinner I dozed off and was only awaken by my own coughing. Now I can not go back to sleep so I'm doing Mylot. Yup, an hour of closed eyes and lost in the world of oblivion really did the trick.
@iva75cpb (729)
• Bulgaria
5 Mar 11
I am glad it did. Do it from time to time and you'll be amazed how much better you'll feel.
@saphrina (31740)
• South Africa
4 Mar 11
Hi sweetie. I have been feeling like that the past few days. Ask someone to come and help you, okay. Now get yourself a nice cup of tea and go to bed. It's not the end of the world when things don't get done in the house.
4 Mar 11
thanks but i am so very cool
@dpk262006 (56170)
• Delhi, India
4 Mar 11
(Saph - you and I wrote similar things)
1 person likes this
@saphrina (31740)
• South Africa
4 Mar 11
swarmish, i think your in the wrong box then. Feeling like this is crappy, Deepak.
@sunny5u (2072)
• India
4 Mar 11
ooh that's so sad eurekafemme, hmmm i never faced such a situation, but i feel pity for you, and don't your spouse help you out???
• Philippines
5 Mar 11
Hello, Sunny. I pity myself, too and wanting to shout for help. :( But, hey I must carry my own cross and do my duties and responsibilities as the lady of the house as well as the Mum of these two kids of whom I adore so much. My husband sometimes do help but not really that much because more often than not he is out working and if he comes home he is too tired and want to do nothing but be in front of the computer until he dozed off. He has no patience doing physical works.
@sunny5u (2072)
• India
6 Mar 11
ohhh that's so sad, hmmm ladies has much patience right, hatsoff to you people for that reason, where come you people get so much of energy?
• Philippines
8 Mar 11
The love we have for our family is th\e thing that keeps us going, I believe. Even if we can hardly stand up because we are already physically exhausted but the fact that our family needs us, we will raise all hell just to get a job done, for the sake of the family.
@sid556 (31005)
• United States
4 Mar 11
It's been a long while since I've been sick. I do know that if I were, that odds are, I'd be the one taking care of me. Take care of yourself the same as you do your kids. Pamper yourself and don't worry about the housework. It'll all still be there waiting patiently when you feel better. Hope you are feeling better soon, Eurekafemme!
• Philippines
5 Mar 11
Hi, Sid.:) I could not help laughing at your statement "It'll all still be there waiting patiently when you feel better" because it is very true. It seems that no one will dare to touch them... I'm glad to hear though that you are healthy and going through the same thing that I am right now. Sigh... I hate having flu. I can take care of myself but there are moments that how i wish someone is up to take care of me, too, when I can no longer have the strength to be in charge. Just a wish... Thank you, dear, for giving me a boost. It makes me feel better.
1 person likes this
@sid556 (31005)
• United States
5 Mar 11
I do know how you feel. I know that when my kids were small and I got sick, I sometimes wished that my husband would just take over caring for the kids, fixing dinner etc. He may have helped to a point but it was very minimal. When he was sick, I would pamper him and keep the kids away from him etc. I think we,women are way tougher than the guys. Well I hope at this point you are all recovered.
• Philippines
5 Mar 11
Hi there again, Sid. You are lucky that your kids are all grown ups, at least they can tend for themselves without depending on you that much. Oh, really? You also treat your husband that way? I thought I was so naive to treat him like a child when he was sick. Actually, he is worse than our kids when he's sick. I'd even bathe him in bed... Jesus...Glad to know that I am not that I am not alone. I'm starting to think that I am so crazy doing that.:)Our husbands are exactly the same. The kids are doing ok. They are naturally cheerful and that they do not let the illness gets into them. As long as they are not weak, I'm ok with that. I know that there's a great chance we all can recover real soon. Thanks, dear.
• United States
6 Mar 11
If you have kids and a husband make them clean because it's there house too and it's not far that all the weight is on your shoulders. You aren't a housewife and you shouldn't be treated like one. If I were you I wouldn't just sit there with my arms crossed and aggravating myself cleaning this house.
• Philippines
8 Mar 11
My kids are only 3 years old and 1 year old, both are girls. My husband is a certified sloppy when it comes to cleaning the house or doing the chores. It is more stressful always telling him to please help me. I don't want to always remind him to do this or do that. He needs to have his own initiative if he wants to help which I believe is next to impossible. What can one do when the house is a mess and no one seems to clean it? I just can't stand here or lie in bed knowing and seeing those litters everywhere. It is driving me insane! Thank you, anyway for sharing your thoughts about this matter. I greatly appreciate it.
• Philippines
5 Mar 11
Perhaps you may hire a housekeeper to help you tidy things up. How's your husband? It would be nicer to have him around you at times like this. Or if he can't, try to seek help from your parents or relatives. Get well soon..
• Philippines
8 Mar 11
Hello, dear. :) I am feeling a lot better compared to the time I posted this. And I get some works done already. Not everything but little by little I was able to accomplish what should be done. Finding an extra pair of hand is difficult here in my country plus we can not afford it.Well, my hubby can pay for that but he is spending too much already for our daily basic needs. An extra expense is not necessary. Thank you, dear for showing some concern.:) Have a great day.:)
@SIMPLYD (79726)
• Philippines
5 Mar 11
I think first , take some medicines for your sickness and rest for a while together with your kids. Then after you have rested , you can do the dirty dishes at the sink. Those dirty laundry could be taken cared of, if you are already well enough to do it. Those sticky bathroom and floor could also be done when you are already well enough. What is important is take a rest now that you are sick. Your sick children needs you to be well and about.
• Philippines
6 Mar 11
Hello,SIMPLYD. How can I disagree with you? For majority of the respondents is telling me to take a rest and ignore the dirty stuff and mess. SO, I am indeed taking a rest right now while kids are with my husband. Will do stuff later, then.:) Have a great sunday, Simplyd.
@n_ich3 (74)
• Philippines
5 Mar 11
Hi! Cheer up! I know that's not easy but you don't have a choice. Just make it little by little but prioritize yourself and your kids condition. Take medicine, drink plenty of water then eat the right foods. And for the mess, just fix it one at a time. Spend for washing clothes for an hour then take a 30 minutes break. Then an hour for bathroom and cr stinks and floor. And the house as much as you can. What's important for you now is at least you've started a little than nothing. Or you can contact your family or friends to help you. That's the responsibility of a parent. Do everything whatever it takes despite all these problems. Problems will just be solved. Just stay on track, still be hopeful and ask guidance from above. Everything has a way. Don't worry and don't forget to smile. You'll just realize later on how you get through from that problems. Cheer up!
• Philippines
6 Mar 11
Hi there, N_ich.:) You are such a great motivator. I think you are well organized. That's what I am doing, dear. Taking things slowly and little by little. I realized that I can not do everything all at the same time. My kids are my top priority so I'm letting the dirty stuff sit for a while. Will get back at them once I feel ok. Thank you for sharing your thoughts about this matter and thanks for the concern, too. Have a great Sunday.
• Philippines
5 Mar 11
I feel for you, eureka. I have three little kids to take care of and that's usually the scenario at home when one or two or, God forbid, all of them gets sick. I don't even know how I survived. But you know what? I did. It wasn't easy but having kids never is. Just pray, okay? And don't worry they'll grow real fast, there will come a time when you'll wish they'd go back to being kids and be with you all the time. :)
• Philippines
6 Mar 11
Hello, dear.:) Yes, I can absolutely agree with you that having kids is not that easy . Moreover, being a housewife doesn't make it easier either. I often wonder how my Mum survived this kind of situation when we were little (3 siblings) but I know that Father was always there to support her and some of the relatives, too. While me, I'm single handedly coping with all of these. I do not mind taking care of my kids. I love them so much and just a hug will definitely erase the weariness I feel. Thanks for sharing your experience. And , yup, I should pray...
• China
5 Mar 11
make a plan first, clear your trouble little by litte, when the day is over you will see that you are incredibally great!
• Philippines
6 Mar 11
Hi, DPRCFOUNDER.:) I am moving slowly but surely towards my goal . Yes, I know that I' can still accomplish something even a little. Little by little, i'll be done with all these tasks. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, dear. Have a great Sunday.
@cher913 (25891)
• Canada
4 Mar 11
oh ya! i have fibromyalgia and work part time (there is no way i could work more) and my hubby works 2 jobs to make ends meet - albeit barely...we struggle every week and i would love the debt fairy to come and wave her magic wand and get rid of it. hubby was off for 9 months and we are still paying off THOSE bills too! ~blah~~!
• Philippines
6 Mar 11
Hello, Cher.:) Oh, the downside of being a middle income.:( I think life is indeed a struggle to thrive despite of its many adversaries. But, there are still more good reasons to consider why we should still be thankful and feel blessed. That's the same reason why husband is often out and working and I am always left alone to tend for the kids and everything. Yeah, I hope fairies are real. All the best to you, dear and hubby.
• United States
4 Mar 11
Are you a single mom? I know how tough that can be. Good thing moms can handle anything, right? LOL :) Perhaps you could call a good friend-or a sister or brother to come help out. I wouldn't worry too much...all those dirty dishes and mess won't run away-do what you can do and get your much needed rest. Hope you feel better soon. God bless.
• Philippines
6 Mar 11
Hi, Browneyedgirl. No, I'm not but it feels like that I am. . It is because husband is often not around and if he is, he isn't much help when it comes to chores and even taking care of the kids. Let's just say that being clean isn't his forte. I can not just ignore the mess, girl. I feel even more sick seeing those dirty stuff greeting all the time. I'm feeling more miserable. Though, I still have the cold and cough but I feel a bit better now. The house is also a bit clean except for the CR. I need to prepare my lungs for it because I got to use bleach which is harsh to the nose and also to the skin. Sigh... if only I have more options.. But, thank you, dear for showing your concern. I greatly appreciate that.
@mermaidivy (15417)
• United States
4 Mar 11
Where is your husband? Maybe you shuold se if he could take a dayoff to take care of you and the kids for a day or two, just put the housework behind until you get well. When I was sick, it was painful for me to have to do the housework as wellas taking care of our newborn couplemonths ago... I hope you can get some rest when your kids nap.
• Philippines
5 Mar 11
Hi there, Mermaidivy.:) My husband need not take a day off from work since he works from home. He only goes out in case there is a meeting or an operation. (he works for an animal welfare group trying to catch the bad guys maltreating the four legged animals). But even if he is home, he seldom helps with the chores. Unfortunately, I married a lazy man. But he is great with the kids only not too patient with them, too. Oh,so you are a Mum. Is that you and your child in your profile picture? Touching pic. Lovely dog, too.:) I was able to doze off for awhile but I was awaken by moy own coughing. Will Mylot until sleep visits me again.:) Thank you for sharing your experience and thoughts about this matter.
@sizzle3000 (3040)
• United States
4 Mar 11
I understand how you feel all too well. I just moved to Tennesse and we took the last load of our stuff down the other day. I have all these boxes to unpack and then I have my daughter's stuff still in her room unpacked because she hasn't moved down with her husband yet. I have computer work to do and house work but I'm sick for right now and my husband's taking caare of me till I'm up on my feet.
• Philippines
5 Mar 11
Hello, Sizzle. Oh, that's a good thing, I mean having a husband who takes care of you until you can be on your own again.. Not all husbands are like yours. Some will just take it as no big deal and as long as they can see you still breathing and moving, they will not even bother to move. You are lucky.:) I hope all things will be well with you again. I'm praying for your speedy recovery, too. THere's plenty of things that need to be done. Be healthy, then.:)
@anil02 (2968)
• India
4 Mar 11
Every one some time face this sitution. You can take help of your any nearst one. First you improve your helath that try do all the yourself. It is said that God help, who help himself. So took faith on God he will help you
• Philippines
5 Mar 11
Hello, Anilo. Such a very wise thing to say. I do believe in what you said, though because I am a Christian and I do believe in God. A relative has no chance to help me. My place is hundreds of miles away from them plus to hire a helper is not that easy. Looking for a qualified and trusted one will be a great task as well. I am trying to slow down. Unlike before that I am working on everything and finish them in a day, but right now, I'm leaving some of the chores behind. I can do them later tomorrow. I just need to stretch my back and feel a li'l better somewhow if rested. Thank you and have a great day.
@tiffnkeat (1679)
• Singapore
4 Mar 11
Prioritize. For you to do the things you mentioned, either you get help OR you get well. So what if the laundry piles up a bit...maybe the dishes need to clean first before insect or bugs comes in. After that, concentrate on rest. let the floor remain sticky for a while while you lie in bed and have the two kids in bed with you, so no need to have such clean shiny floor. Concentrate on good rest to get well. You have two kids, I do assume your partner could help too? Otherwise, really, don't be afraid to ask friends for help, say in babysitting the kids when you are well so you can do the chores if it is too much to ask your friend to do it. Wishing you get well soon.
• Philippines
5 Mar 11
Hello, Tiffnkeat.:) Thank you for such advice. I do realize that I only have two choices of which you articulated. You sounded like my Mom when I called her up today telling her of my situation. My hubby will surely help but he is often out and when he comes home, he is too tired to do other household chores but would rather stay in front of the computer to relax.
• United States
4 Mar 11
I am so glad I don't hav eto go through that. I just cleaned the litter box and that is it for me today. By the way do you watch the tv show desperate housewives?
• Philippines
5 Mar 11
Hi, giftsandbagscom.:) You are very lucky then, that you don't have to go through a lot of troubles like I do. I will not ask why but whatever the reason is, it is keep it up. Yes, I do watch Desperate Housewives, err, used to. It is no longer shown in my cable channels. I can relate to the character of Felicity Huffman, a former corporate girl turned into a stress out stay at home mother.
@mtrguanlao (5527)
• Philippines
4 Mar 11
Hello dear! Sad to hear it my friend! Please call your relatives right away or a friend who could at least do some household chores in your place. I suggest you tell your hubby that you need a helper. Try to be strong enough for your kids friend,I know you,you can do it! When hubby gets home,I know for sure he will take care of you even in simple ways. Hope you'll be fine soon friend!
• Philippines
5 Mar 11
Hello , dear friend.Good to see you here. My relatives are very far from where I am plus it is not that easy to ask assistance from them because all of them are also busy minding and tending to their own responsibilities. My hubby is so aware that I can not cope up with all the houseworks and the kids but the thing is, it is difficult to hire a helper. Well, he is sometimes doing his best to help me but more often he simply ignores the mess. It is me who couldn't and wouldn't that's why I am the one who is oblige to do everything, for my own sanity. Yes, dear, I can do it. I'll ge through it, too. Thank you for giving me a boost, MTR. I truly appreciate that.
@bounce58 (17526)
• Canada
8 Mar 11
I've had days like those. Where I take care of all of the people in the house, yet there is no one to take care of me. I keep coming to visual of a friend of mine some years back when I was feeling so low. He stood on my doorway, and just said, 'nobody's going to help you, so stand up and do it yourself'. Just that image would drive me to do what is necessary. And I would do one thing at a time. It may take time, but I'm sure things will get sorted out. I hope yours will, too!