Baby Shower

I totally agree. My MIL was a little miffed that I didn't let her help out with my baby shower for the twins. She told me she was going to plan it, then asked me for a list of things I wanted. She was going to send that list to the guests. I thought it was a bad idea. Sure it would help me get all the things I needed.. but what if every guest got the same item? Or what if I didn't think of something that I needed. What I love about getting gifts is people typically get you what they think you'll want or need.. so you're surprised and often get something you never even realized you'd love. Of course you also sometimes get things you hate and don't need.. but when it comes to babies there's really no such thing as not needing something! Then I ended up doing the food too because I didn't like MIL's idea for it. I bought a sandwich platter from a local grocery store, and bought a few side dishes. I can't remember MIL's plan, I just know I didn't like it. So she ended up very upset that she didn't get to organize the whole thing.. but that's how I am, I like things my way, especially if it's my party!

It really looks like you would have been included in their plans. That was going a bit overboard, as that money could have been used for buying the baby something really really nice.

I think you did the right thing. That stinks that they did that. I'm glad you decided to just give it to your daughter-in-law. That would really rankle me if someone did that to me. It's in poor taste to try to use you like that.

I am so glad, you opted out on the $100.00! It seems to me that they were MORE concerned about the venue, than what the venue was all about! Why NOT have the "Baby Shower" in some-one's home...and the money go towards what it is supposed to...gifts for the NEW baby, and items for the home! I am soooooo glad you put your $100.00 to better use! Catered food???? What a waste of money, shocks the dickens out of me, that they would make this such a "grandiose" affair...when the economy is NOT great, and a nice home setting, with home-made goodies a much nicer affair. GOOD ON YOU!!! HUGZ & LUV!

I have been in a situation like this...when my niece was getting married. All the aunts give a shower. Well my sister and SIL drink...I do not. When you start adding the cost of hard drinks to a shower where by the way the men were also invited it adds up in a hurry. I don't think every event needs to be a drink fest! Anyway when we totalled up the bill I was shocked. I did all the table decorations...brought food...and the gift plus had to drive over a hundred miles. My SIL and sister both have tons of money. I however don't...I was very upset.

I'm sorry that you were treated like that. When my sister had her baby shower, it was thrown by a cousin and friend.. who invited people in the family that my sister never talk to (but all have good paying jobs). I wasn't even aware that anyone had thrown her one... Babies ARE a reason to celebrate, but instead of going all elaborate with it, it could have been sponsored at someone's home or a park, and that money spent on the baby's needs or on mom's pregnancy/post partum health.

It could have been done at home, as that was an expense that was not necessary that Money could have been put away for the Baby things that is going to be needed To me, yes it might have been nice but it could have been held at home

I would have thought they would have asked you to help with some food or something like that. Of course, what do I know. I have helped with showers at church, and yes, the committee splits the cost of a gift, but that is more like $20.

we always had baby showers in someones home! not rentd place the sound very snobish. THe money could have been spent on the baby thing rather than a rented room. yup ya help out with food setting up decorations and stuff like that thats all

we just usually have showers at our church or at someones home. its more low key than that. i am generally the one that makes invitations for our church showers. i am fairly crafty with paper so it usually falls on me. then there is another lady who is a whiz in the kitchen, naturally she gets nominated to do the food. etc

What ever happened to holding a baby shower in someone's living room, with people bringing snacks?

In all the showers I've been involved with over time, I was always asked to make food, get the paper plates, cups, etc., invent the games or some such part of the organization. Never have been asked to donate that much money. What was your $100 supposed to be used for?

Ya. It sounds to me like they just wanted the money from you. I bet you wouldn't even have heard from them if it hadn't been for that. Sounds like it was a very nice shower. Who ever thought it up should pay for it. If that person can't afford such a lavish shower then they should come down alittle on the whole thing. Who has that kind of money now days?

I think the $100 was a bit much to ask. I would have thought helping with the shower would have been more than just donating money. A hundred bucks can buy a very very nice gift. I think some of the nicest babyshowers are at home with some nice decorations and some silly games. Makes them more personal in my opinion.

Well since you're asking I think you are one smart Grandma. Honest to God what do people think that getting a year older each year makes us rich and stupid? Good for you that you can and do say No. Proud of you anf the way you handled this issue. Congrats on a new addition. Take care

geesh. sounds like that person really over did it. when i was having babies people would just have a shower in someones home and bring what they could. why do all the young people have to go overboard these days when the economy is in such a state? you'd think they'd have enough sense to cut back a little. your idea was better.

That would be very upsetting.I would feel used. That is awful to get a demandful situation like that. You pay or no invite. I feel like you helping is helping out on doing things no money.If they want an expensive situation they should pay for it there self.All of that expense will go to waste. It doesn't go no where.It will be interesting when the baby is born if her mom will buy everything that the baby needs. If not, it would be more important for her mom to make sure the baby has everything it needs then for there to be an expensive baby shower. I have ran into that situation before with my son. I feel sorry for your son if he has to go through what my son has. His in-laws were always wanting to pay for things for them so there life would be perfect and he thought it was neat them helping out so much then later on they got mad at him for not spending lots of money on his family when he couldn't afford that and he was working all the time and trying his best. They seem to be better about it now but it was a real mess for a while.