Meals to win over a man? ( a rant)

United States
April 14, 2011 11:37pm CST
Well I guess I Should be All alone for the rest of my life . Why? I don't cook. So how else will I ever get a man to love me? This is the implication i get from articles listing the meals a woman could make to get a man to propose. If The Only way to make a man love you is to cook for him I will never be loved? Wrong! My guy loves me and I Will Never cook for him. So he mustn't love me right?Do you think your man loves you Only because of your cooking? Or did you fall for her Only because she could cook?
2 people like this
10 responses
@livecenter (1138)
• Malaysia
15 Apr 11
I believe you got the wrong idea there, sarahruthbeth22...As per my understanding, the articles you have read are simply articles that list out the meals that a woman could cook to get a man to propose her...I believe that woman is better in cooking than most men, albeit the fact that most of the best chefs in the world are men...For that very reason, one of the criteria that satisfy men description of women is the ability to cook... It is not to say that cooking is the only way to win your man, but if you cannot cook what do you think both of you will eat after your marriage? You can always eat outside every now and then, but to do that every day will dry up your pocket faster than you can imagine... Despite the fact that you cannot cook, you can always learn...Learning how to cook is not as hard as you would have thought...Simply learn from countless cooking books available in your book store, or simply revert to your mother for her secret recipe...Good luck!
• United States
15 Apr 11
First I will never marry my guy , I love him Too much to inflict that type of pain! And second , Here in the States I eat frozen food. i heat it up and there is dinner. Third just because i said I don't cook Does not mean i don't know how. I have seen so much of the Food Network and the cooking Channel that i know how to cook, I just think food is too expensive for me to mes up. Plus I don't want to cook, It is too messy and unrewarding.Why cook something I will Never eat? I rather have a pizza!
• Malaysia
16 Apr 11
If you think that marrying your guy will inflict him pain, why should you be with him in the first place? I believe marriage is something to be cherished on and not to be afraid of...I am in no way forcing you to marry your guy or to interfere on your personal business, though...I believe you are more mature than I am to decide for your own benefit, but personally I think you should consider marrying him for your own happiness... To respond to frozen food, I think that should be enough for you isn't it? But why don't you take your time to cook, and eventually you will discover yourself that eating what you cook yourself with your family make you feel better than serving them with fresh-from-the-fridge foods...However, it is your life so think about it again and decide for yourself...
1 person likes this
• United States
16 Apr 11
I am with my guy Because he makes me happy. He is with me because I make him happy. But if we were to marry It would All disappear.To me Marriage is the end of happiness , well at least for me. I would end up resenting him and the love will die and soon I would either hate him or Worse have apathy for him. That would hurt him Greatly. He Loves me , to see me stop loving him would inflict the worse pain! Frozen Pizza is far better these days! i love it. And Frozen dinners are great!No I wouldn't find anything I cook appetizing because I cooked it! I do bake . But I will never cook.
@inertia4 (27775)
• United States
18 Apr 11
Don't feel bad. The girl I am with now does not cook either. Well, she does not cook everyday. She cooks maybe twice a week. When I was married, my ex cooked everyday and always had a hot meal on the table. I do not think that cooking food is the only thing in a relationship. Besides, men should learn how to cook also. Don't men make the best chefs? See! I feel a total connection to the girl I am with and believe me it goes deeper than cooking.
2 people like this
• United States
19 Apr 11
I don't feel bad , I was more pi$$ed off by the assumption that women Had to cook to " catch" a man. Yes most chefs are men.Thank G-d! But I once thought how miserable a chef would be with me! He would want to "impress" me with a posh meal and All I ever want is a pizza!
@mr_pearl (5037)
• India
16 Apr 11
Well, it is not just the way Sarah... There are other ways too.. this is only one of the best.. As a guy I can tell you how we guys love the spicy food cooked by our girls... :) But trust me, that is not only way to a man's heart... There are many other things too...
• United States
16 Apr 11
My guy said he doesn't like spicy food! I must have done something right , he fell for me Way before I fell for him.
1 person likes this
@laydee (12813)
• Philippines
15 Apr 11
I think you got it all wrong there friend. People don't get married because they know how to cook or some talent. Men marry women because they both love each other. It has nothing to do with the fact that a woman can or can't cook. Further, I think the best way to anyone's heart (be it a man or a woman) is the way the other takes care of us. If we feel that we're being cared, that simply means that you are loved - one way of showing how much you love a person is how you take care of what's important to them - mostly feeding them. If you can't cook, it doesn't mean you love him less, however, what's stopping you from learning? or at least attempting to do so? Cooking doesn't require talent, there are a lot of ways to learn this skill but you truly need to want it in the first place. I remember how my mom kept on learning new things to be able to take care of my dad well. She studied cooking because she wasn't taught how to cook by her mom. Then she learned how to do massages. Then she made sure she became an expert of whatever made my dad happy - like perfecting the recipe he loves. Remember that actions speak louder than words. You may say "I love you" every second of the day, but nothing shows it more than the actions you do for the one you love. Yes, you may take pride in never cooking for him - but perhaps if you could swallow your pride and learn how to fry an egg for him once, he'd feel that you could adjust and be better because of the love you both share.
1 person likes this
• United States
15 Apr 11
That's the whole point! If I had to " swallow my pride" and cook , Then I would be like his wife and not his love. as his wife I would be forced to do things I loathe and in return my love for him would die and resentment would take it's place! And then apathy! I never had the desire to cook.what I like to eat I can buy frozen. I told him this and he is fine with it! I'm sorry if my statement seemed like I was boasting.As for learning to cook what he likes I won't. I won't waste food doing this. But i Would have a cook do it for him. So I rather pay others to do this. Does this mean I'm a failure?
1 person likes this
@laydee (12813)
• Philippines
27 May 11
No, it doesn't mean that you're a failure. It just means that you won't do everything for the one you love. Being a wife is not about being forced to do something that you loathe, it's about doing things to show the man you love that you love him. Everything isn't all about being cute and saying I love you. As for paying others, then perhaps you should be a good provider in order to hire someone to cook for the family. For the record, you just insulted every wife by saying that being a wife is not being a loved one. I guess you're not ready for the title anyway.
1 person likes this
• United States
31 May 11
First sorry for the delay. I didn't get this message until now. First I didn't mean to insult anyone. I will never marry because to me , and me alone it seems, marriage and love doesn't mix. I can and do profess my love to my guy in many ways , cooking is just not one of them. He is happy with me so That what matters.I will never be ready to marry and watch the love I feel get replaced with hatred and resentment. I will never marry because That is Exactly what will happen to me, no one else. I am not saying All wives are like this , I just know I Would Have to be that way. I know Many have told me that they have mixed love with marriage but for me I have to pick one Or the other.I choose love.I do express my love in other ways than just" Being cute and saying I love you." cooking is just not one of them. now you can assume that I can't be in love because I will never marry himbut that is wrong. I will never marry him Because I love him.
1 person likes this
@saphrina (31739)
• South Africa
15 Apr 11
Whoever told you that sweetie? The man is suppose to love you, not what you can do. Mine can cook, a bit, i think. But anyway, that story is a old wives tale.
1 person likes this
• United States
16 Apr 11
It is an saying I heard growing up And then i saw an article about " engagement chicken" if a woman makes this chicken ,men propose soon afterward. I thought Wow so to them I will Never have love but I Do have love. Then i thought of All the women who think they Have to cook to win his love and it pi$$ed me off.
@saphrina (31739)
• South Africa
16 Apr 11
I don't even eat chicken. I'm no mans maid. If he's hungry, i'm sure he will know how to feed himself.
1 person likes this
• United States
16 Apr 11
As a wife I would Have to be the maid , but as a girlfriend I am Not! I'm Very old fashioned when it comes to marriage and Very contemporary about Everything else.
• Canada
22 Apr 11
I can't cook to save my life. i burn water! On the other hand, my husband is a gourmet, and loves it!!! We make a great team, that way. He does all the cooking, and we are both very happy. A relationship should not be about sexist stereotypes, but rather about the two individuals, and how they compliment each other.
1 person likes this
• United States
22 Apr 11
Thank you! That's my view too. I can boil water. I can reheat things and I do bake but cook? No! But at least you enjoy hubby's cooking. Hell on earth for a gourmet is fall for me. All I want to eat is simple fare. He would want to impress me and all I want is a burger.
@mandylee (267)
• China
17 Apr 11
i think someone like you may love either your goodness or shortcoming,i means true love.if the man prefer a girl that is skilled in cooking,he'd rather choose a chef not a lover!Nevertheless,when a girl is falling in love with a boy,she will be as best as she can to satisfy him for learning cooking skills.Love is selfless
1 person likes this
• United States
17 Apr 11
He loves me, the Real me. he didn't seem to care that I can't cook! I agree love should be given selflessly , meaning you love the person faults and all. But Having to learn to cook So a man can love me will Never happen.
@dreamy1 (3815)
• United States
15 Apr 11
Why don't you cook? You like to eat right? You like spending money eating out all the time? Everyone should learn how to cook be they male or female. I don't understand when people say they can't or won't cook it makes no sense. I'm not the best cook and don't cook things from scratch but at least I can open a can and throw it in a pot do you at least do that? I have a word for the men who may be reading this post. Learn how to cook! The way to a woman's heart is also through her stomach. I know myself and I can speak for a lot of other women we love it when a man can cook, trust me it will go a long way. We get tired of cooking for you all the time learn to cook and it will make us happy.
1 person likes this
• United States
16 Apr 11
I have no desire to cook. I think food is way too expensive to play around with and what I love to eat i can buy frozen or at a restaurant.If I had to cook what I ate , I wouldn't eat. I have fasted for 36 hours once , I could try for a week. If the way to a woman's heart is through her stomach , then I am not a woman. Respect wrapped in understanding is the way to my heart. We can Always order a pizza!
@piya84 (2591)
• India
15 Apr 11
Its just a skill just like earning money.A man can love you and vice a versa even though you dont earn money but then it can be disadvantage when it comes to starting a family.Cooking is not a gig deal.Anyone can be average cook if there is desire.
• United States
15 Apr 11
I have no desire to cook , ever.
@xien2xien (1383)
• Philippines
15 Apr 11
here's a thing, if you can't cook then marry someone who can cook in that case there's someone who will cook when you start your family man doesn't love a woman because she can cook alone, cooking is skills or talent that can be learned in due time, while you have your own skills and talent which your man definitely will love more than knowing how to cook
1 person likes this
• United States
15 Apr 11
No. I will never cook. With all the cooking shows I see , I Know how but I will not do it myself.My guy does not care Thank G-d! But if I Really listened to these articles I would have never believed he loved me. I never cooked for him , he can't love me! Thankfully I didn't.