Do you feel used by someone else ?

@thepank (202)
India
May 26, 2011 4:03am CST
Hello friends We met others in our journey of life and we make some good or bad friends but some time we met a different kind of person who neither a good nor bad for you. I mean to say ,do you feel sometimes that a person is using you and sometimes you thinks he/she is not using you he/she but they just need your help.What do you think what oneself should do under this situation ?
1 person likes this
15 responses
• Philippines
26 May 11
If it won't hurt you that much, just construe it as a friend needing your help rather than he is using you. Hey, always give the person a benefit of doubt. Who knows? You might need his or help someday. Your act of kindness will come in handy. Asking favor to someone is easier when you know that you also made a favor for him. This is the principle of reciprocity. However, when time comes that you needed his assistance and he would not help you, you know what kind of person he is. Thus, when he needs your help again, you know what to do. REFUSE. Do not worry if your kindness would not be reciprocated. Life has its own way to get back to those who are "USER" friendly. Do not dwell too much on them. What is important is you are not like them. Cheer up!
@thepank (202)
• India
26 May 11
thanks for such a wonderful explanation .
• Philippines
26 May 11
Thank you for giving me the best response. My first time! glad to be of help. happy my lotting
@krajibg (11939)
• Guwahati, India
26 May 11
Hi thepank, Men's supremacy not only over other creatures but also over man kind has been there since men grew into men. Some people are to rule and most others are to be ruled. Here emerges the concept of being used or not used. Taking for granted the past habit even today there is class divisions. The working class or poor class knows they are being used but but there is no other way left. Coming down to personal level I have never felt used by anybody knowingly. If my boss directs me to complete a task withing a stipulated time, this is not being used rather this is a part of our duty.
@thepank (202)
• India
26 May 11
Karjibg I agree with you on some point ,but you are taking about something else . Doing a office work is not as personal wen compare to a personal relationships. My question is only about love and friendship , and we all somewhere at some point of time used by others.
@krajibg (11939)
• Guwahati, India
26 May 11
May be I did not read the end part of your post. In fact you should have posted this discussion on 'relationship' ot 'love'. Yes in such relation if one feels used by the other the relation would not last long.
@kingparker (9698)
• United States
26 May 11
I met a lot of bad people lately, that wasn't my luck at all, do you think? Some people simply use me, and scam me on money. I admitted, I didn't size up those people at first hand, and let them took my money easily. My fault, and my mistake. I shouldn't be careful at the first hand. I hope those people will meet your destiny end somehow. shame on them. Also, the girl I like before, she simply use me too. She will not get any better.
@thepank (202)
• India
26 May 11
Its a normal thing in every bodies life , so that you will be alert for future .
@wings143 (133)
• Philippines
27 May 11
do i feel that a person is using me? no..but i do feel that they abandon me for no reason at all.
@r3jcorp (1384)
• Philippines
27 May 11
Yes, a lot of times, by friends, by co-workers, by my bosses. But it's just a matter of thinking. They used you because you also benefit from them. It is not like a mother to children relationship wherein you give everything without expecting in return. They gain something from you but looking at it, I also gain from them too.
• Philippines
27 May 11
I have met a lot of users. They came to you. They make you friends. They make you feel important. But then sometime they wanted something from you. Some people are like that. Most of them are businessmen. But if you can't give them any favor anymore they will leave you and won't make you friends anymore. Well, that's the reality of life and if ever you meet some genuine people, those who really cared for you and is there for you through your up's and downs are the one's worth keeping for.
• New Zealand
26 May 11
Always. I don't know but maybe i'm bad at handling social relations and often let people take advantage of me. It could be something wrong with my life. I do have friends with benefits, i help others in terms of money and advice any time they call me. So i guess i need to move on and learn to say no. I don't know, i'm just confused with all this 'getting used by others'.
@Pose123 (21667)
• Canada
26 May 11
Hi thepank, Everyone that we meet in the journey through life, comes to us for a reason as nothing happens by chance. If we treat everyone the way that we would like to be treated if we were in their situation, everything will be fine. Never think of what you can get from another, rather think of what you can give. When we live this way we will always have enough and to spare. Blessings.
@mixyly (20)
• Philippines
26 May 11
Being used by other people is not that easy, you tried your best to be the best person that they could have but all along the way they were just using you. It's painful as it is but I believe that they cant take advantage on you if you will allow them. Everyone of us is a unique individual so why use other people in your own expense?It only implies that they don't believe in their self and they don't have the guts to take the risk because every step they make they need someone like you. Be confident of yourself so that no other people can use you and if it will happen again, just say to them that I'm your friend but not your servant. Enjoy life my dear, never mind them because one day they will just realize that being a used is not that easy at all.
@Bellapop (1281)
26 May 11
Yes I've felt that a lot of time, people just come up to you because they need your help and then they don't want anything else to do with you, or else they come up to help you but not for your benefit, only to make themselves look good in front of certain important people...
@casualkT (141)
• Canada
26 May 11
just let it go ... unless you know yourself it's better to not get so deep with someone
• India
26 May 11
no i don't feel used by someone else, i never make them use me. It depends on us, how we interact with someone so they automatically understand then you are not fool and can't be fooled by them with efforts.
@sender621 (14956)
• United States
26 May 11
I believe that many of us have felt that we were used by someone else in our lives. it can be discouraging, disappointing, annoying and even resenting to be treated this way. it can take away the self confidence you have and leave with you guilt and shame over allowing someone else to use. you may even blame yourself when it was no fault of your own. Take care and don't let someone else use you for their own gain.
• Bulgaria
26 May 11
Everyone men in my life good and bad people !Such is life happening to with our lives good and bad things but even though the person can happen and bad things he has to think positively!
@amitgune (877)
• India
26 May 11
There are certain occassions in the life of a person that he feels that he is used by someone. These happen in anyone's life. I fell that if the person who is using use is a close assciate, a family member or a friens, I think that one should just continue and tag along, whereas if it is just someone whom we do not know that well, we should inform that person rather intelligently that we are aware that this is being done.