when the friend you love doesnt love you as much
June 2, 2011 9:49pm CST
I believe a friendship is a give and take relationship. I mean, after all when two people consider each other friends it means they like each other, value each other and would make effort to keep the friendship alive. But sigh! Sometimes it feels I love my friends more than they love me. I text them more often, i give more cards, more gifts. I initiate all the time. Sometimes I wonder if the friendship would continue if ever i stop doing things from my end. Would they also miss me, call me? I understand that we have to love unconditionally but i mean,they're my friends right? I wonder if its just my personality, coz I tend to shower people I love and care about with all the love and affection I can give. Ahh, i just know I love my friends with all my being thats why I put up with them.
3 Jun 11
Hi artist_temper ! These things go with me as well. I am the one who initiates in my group, and the rest of them seem to have no interest in what I do. Well, I believe it is a "give and take" relation,.. but if you have "given" and are now waiting to "take", then I guess there is no difference in between your friends and a wending machine, because you really treating him like one.. lolz.. :) Your ways of expressing things differ from that of your friends. Thats why there is always a chance of clash of views, in between two individuals; both trying to do things in their own way. "Do your job, and dont think about what the outcome may be". They have been blessed by a friend like you, and I believe they do realize your importance to them as a friend. They might have their own strange ways of showing it.. :p Dont stop what you do, that is to bring happiness in their life. If you can bring a smile on someones' face, then that is an achievement in itself. Happy mylotting :)
3 Jun 11
i feel the same you feel. i also always show a lot of care to my friends. not only to friends but for guys i liked till now. and they never cared for me more than i cared for them. its always me that was like always showing i care. sure we cant feel happy that way. its like you say they are your friends so they are supposed to show you that they care for you. it cant be just you always showing that first. i always feel that way too. but why dont you try to make a little test? be one day without texting your friends and see if they will text you^^ if they do then it means that they care even they are not as showy as you :) that depends also of the personality.
3 Jun 11
Wow your a very nice friend then. But if ever 1 day and you stop sending them gifts and cards then thats the time you would know who your real friends are. But if you are a true friend to them just keep your mind and your heart open and ready for them when they need you.
• United States
3 Jun 11
Love is not only loving, but also being loved because when one feels loved, one's love grows. If you don't feel it from them, they are probably not true friends and are probably around because they are benefiting in some way (financially?) from your friendship. I would stop giving so much of myself and give them the opportunity to express their true friendship to me. It might answer the question you have. The only unconditional love I have ever experienced is the love of a parent to his/her child. Other than that love, every other love has conditions that includes the love of a lifelong companion or lover or that of a lifelong friend.
3 Jun 11
I think every man use to have experience like you. Yes you can love her. I don't see the reason why you can not love your friend.This is your life you did not do anything wong.Tell her you love her ,if it not work you just move along and be friend with hre again.Don't let anybody point to you and say you should do that or those.This is your life not them. Don't do the mistake like me.Just tell her.
3 Jun 11
I think the best friend I have ever made is our Jesus Christ, the son of Almighty God. He has always been there for me and he will never fail me.Man kind is too deceiful. Many friend may rally around you when they know there is plenty of food or money to take from you. But as soon as you run dry and you are noticed to be in difficult they will start leaving you in suffer alone. that is the world friendship. I have had so many world friend who does not love me. But I just let them hang around me. But I know my true friend which is Jesus. Most worldly friend are betrayer and even killers.
3 Jun 11
i have a sympathy to you my friend, but i have learned that we are all different and has unique way of showing our love towards our friends. giving and being expressive is your own way, but you should not expect your friends to do the same thing too. they have their own style, listening to your problems, thinking of you in a silence, and helping you behind your knowledge. just observe and realize the things they are doing for you and not the things you are doing for them. friendship is not all about for our own interest but rather seeking their interest and making them feel that we are their best friends no matter what.
3 Jun 11
What does friendship mean? Many of us think it is a relationship as you described.However,friendship means more than that.In my opinion,when we call a person friend,we should treat him as a person who has something in common with us and would like to share the hobbies or interests with us.Friendship should be sharing the happiness and sadness in our life.For example,maybe he likes reading,and would like to talk about what he reads with you,bringing both himself and you happiness.So communication plays a more important role in friendship. What's more,when we send something to our friends,I think,for real friendship,there is no need for us to think of the return.Maybe,at the momoment when you are sending him some gifts,he or she doesn't remember you,but it is enough if he or she would like to share his or her life with you.