how close I came to suicide

@savypat (20248)
United States
June 26, 2011 2:48pm CST
So many of you had strong feelings about suicide that I thought I would tell you about my own brush with it. A couple of years ago I had a very painful case of shingles, and I was put on very strong pain med. Yes Ocxicodine was one of them. After the pain grew less I felt I no longer needed all those strong drugs and made up my mind to get off of them. I had never had any experience getting off of drugs like that but knew you had to do it by reduced usuage. The first day I gave up one, the second day two and the third day it happened. I was in extreme drug withdrawl, I went crazy and all I could think about was stopping it, I wanted to kill myself, I went looking for the gun, Thank God Hubby was home and noticed something wrong with me, I told him I just couldn't stand it anymore and he got my poor hysterical self to the Doctor right away. The Doctor knew what had happensd and told me, then he shot me full of those same drugs and set up a withdrawl system under Hubby's care which finally got me off of the drugs. As soon as I was sane again I realized how lucky I was that Hubby was home and I Thanked God for this very scary lesson. I will never judge another person on drugs or off who feels their answer is suicide. I know how they must feel to consider this answer. And I give great credit to any one who comes off of drugs.
5 people like this
7 responses
@catof1 (683)
• United States
14 Jul 11
I understand the feeling. After my ex husband hurt my neck and back by slamming doors on it and throwing me down stairs I was in a lot of pain and did not want to take any medicatin. My mother is on a lot of pain medicatin and it just plains scares me. She is not the same person any more and Dr after Dr say it's caused by the pain medication. That being said I had to take 3 different ones and go to a chiropractor then I tried to ween my self off on my own.....uh bad idea I found out. I was soooo mean and mad and then sad and just wanted it to go away. Now I did not try anything except sleep more. I could not sleep at night since my circadiam (miss spell) rythem got messed up due to the medication and my cycles. wow I just could not beleive it! So I can understand what it feels like. I am still suffereing but for emotional reason now more so. God bless
1 person likes this
@savypat (20248)
• United States
15 Jul 11
It takes time and a lot of love of self to get over the bad bumps in life.
• United States
30 Jun 11
((hugs)) your hubby was there when you needed him the most! I am glad you guys went to the Dr and did worked out a plan to get them out of your system and back to normal. You are right everyone probably has felt that way some point in their life and everyone has a story how they got past it. Thanks for sharing your story.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
27 Jun 11
Hi Savypat, Congratulations for having such a loving and caring Husband. I salute him. Your Story can help others for sure as it can be served as a Pre-Caution. I would let my Auntie read this as she is having the same problem at the moment. Thanks Dennis
1 person likes this
• Philippines
27 Jun 11
I'm glad that your story ended in a good note. Thinking that you had to end your life because of what you were feeling is really scary. At tht the time, you were not thinking about your family, and you just wanted to end all of it right away. Good thing your husband was there. I hope some of the people who read your story would realize that ending your life is not the solution to all the problems. Your family is there to support you and to get through to ths hardships.
1 person likes this
• China
26 Jun 11
Sometimes it is very hard to overcome some difficulties, we should try our best to do it, because we should know after that life will be more beautiful and more valuable.
1 person likes this
@choybel (5059)
• Philippines
26 Jun 11
The thought have had passed my mind several times at different ages in my life but I never really had the guts to go for it. I end up thinking of all the people who would suffer and feel bad for me, and I'd feel responsible for them. It's a good thing you came through.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84132)
• Shingle Springs, California
29 Jun 11
Wow, how scary. Thank goodness he did come home.