Why did I change?

Philippines
June 29, 2011 4:55am CST
Hello lotters, I never had the feeling before, but some how i felt unease by it. well, i did feel the same thing when i was invited for a mylot conference, the fear and adrenalin. but i went anyway and it felt great, but i felt sad because i didn't contribute to the food. Today, I was talking to a friend online. some normal conversations here and there, until asked about planning to visit me at my home. i got scared first than excited, because i haven't had visitors for a long time. not to mention were broke until next few months or next year. I don't want to be rude, but i guess i could have said NO, but am not used to it, you know being visited. even with some of them i had a talked to about having a second conference at our place, i started having second thoughts. Not her fault though but I hope she understands if i felt hesitant, i used to live the world they live in, going out when ever I want, meeting people. now, i don't feel like doing that anymore. i felt so behind with the world i used to live in. probably when were ready. i didn't gave a straight answer as we both log off. Such a weird phase of change I used to be the "entertainer" back then now am the introvert I asked myself once in a while *what happened to me, where am i going with this* or..i could change my mind again..
3 people like this
5 responses
• Philippines
29 Jun 11
hi LK, People changed some for better or for worse You can always say NO if you don't feel comfortable with the idea Sometimes someone can changed our views or out look that what true friends do But of course if we want to change something on ourselves it will be our choice and not someone else choice. If you get irritated to your friend maybe you can rid of her If you can bare to see the sadness on her LOL........... She will understand you that is for sure just give her a hint if ever you change your mind . happy mylotting
@jaiho2009 (39019)
• Philippines
29 Jun 11
LK will surely changed his mind,once a guava landed on his head
• Philippines
30 Jun 11
Hello Bhaby, That's the point, It's not easy to say NO because i also wanted to have some people to talked to. not to mention you helping me in how to feed my cats well. they are ALL thin now and i feel sad about it. besides, the meeting place on the second floor isn't done yet, i want all of us to meet there for a better view. If i do change my mind, make sure you have Guava to SPARE.
• Philippines
2 Jul 11
Hey!You can say NO to me really I can understand that besides we're friends Wherever we are if we are with our friends it will be a better view even it is near a trash bins . I hope you can change your mind because I can pick a guavas without landing on my head
@jaiho2009 (39019)
• Philippines
29 Jun 11
dear LK, Sorry dear,you will get to know what you will feel once "we"[b][/b] popped in front your door steps Don't you worry..we won't ransack your fridge and won't eat a week stored foods for the family
• Philippines
29 Jun 11
jaiho, Bring some guava so if ever he will hide you can throw some at their gate for sure he will come out
1 person likes this
@jaiho2009 (39019)
• Philippines
29 Jun 11
hahahaa
• Philippines
30 Jun 11
Hello Sis Jaiho, There's nothing to be ransacking about since we don't have that much in the fridge. and that's exactly why i didn't feelt like having a visitor. just today they had prayer meeting now she's completely out of money. probably next year when those people starts paying up.
@cherrc (666)
• Philippines
10 Jul 11
May be because you don't want to get used to things you did before and live within your means. Plus the fact that you are getting more matured to have quiet time for yourself? :) Anyways, I hope you will still keep the balance by hanging out with friends or family. Take care. :)
• Philippines
13 Jul 11
Hello cherrc, Yes, that's true that I've been growing a bit but mature, probably am a bit shakey when it comes to this maturity thing. but some said i have mature but most of the time i have been active just trying to be excusing myself from doing what ever i want. anyways, that's my problem recently.have a nice day.
• Philippines
29 Jun 11
I strongly think you're just scared. when i left you, u were really mad as hell. then depressed, i can understand that. you got new friends now, sure they're not perfect, but they will do. you don't have a stasis pod where you can sleep and then awake after 100 yrs, you're living and soon going to get old. do it for me. have friends again.
• Philippines
30 Jun 11
Hello Mika How are you? I hope you're doing fine. No, it's alright, am fine right here. Not really that i dreamed of having a statis pod but you know i can't have visitors if we don't have something to feed on. besides, they're also coming from far places. probably some day, next year perharps.
@chuyins123 (2118)
• Philippines
29 Jun 11
Must be something about what you're doing and getting used to be physically alone? I remember a friend of mine shared to me this thought. That if you can already live alone, at home with just TV or internet on the computer and you feel contented with it, beware! It's no longer healthy. Man is Physically Social Being and so you have to have at least an interaction with real people in real world, not just virtually. It could also be that you are quite reserved this time for some reasons that you haven't shared with us yet. I do hope you'd overcome that and be the "entertainer" again, as you always are before. Bless you my friend. chuyins
• Philippines
29 Jun 11
Hello chuyins, thank you for the kind words, if it's not healthy then i'd better go see my friends. unfortunately, there are some parts of mylife which i have NO intention of sharing to. am sure people here understand that. some of us here had even pretend to be some one else while people like me get to be honest all the time. probably some day not this year, i think.