Is it difficult to admit mistakes?

By Toni
@toniganzon (42733)
Philippines
July 2, 2011 12:03am CST
There was a point in my life where I couldn't seem to admit that I've made a mistake and I always blame others for it. Through time I learned that such behavior isn't healthy at all. Slowly I've come to admit my mistakes, apologize and learn from it. Now here comes an online friend I haven't talked for four months asking me how I was doing and I told him I'm having some problems with my internet connection but it's being fixed now and anyway it's not that terrible. I added that I'm not just used to having a slow low speed Internet. He responded by saying he understood and he can just imagine how hot I felt, and so I replied with lol! He told me he was referring to my mind and not my body but I told him I knew that and I just laughed because how he used it was wrong. He said he knew and was just trying to confuse me. he made a mistake and couldn't admit and now he's making another one by lying! I wanted him to admit his mistake so I asked why would he want to confuse me and he said nothing!!! He intentionally confused me for nothing! A very lame excuse!
7 people like this
36 responses
@derek_a (10903)
3 Jul 11
We all need to acknowledge when we make mistakes in my opinion. But we live in a society that tends to shun people who don't get things right and so there is in the back of the mind of most of us that it is *wrong* to fail. If we can admit that we've made a mistake though and not care about making mistakes or what our critics may say, then we can be free. It is not good to judge or be judged really because that causes tension when we are trying to be right or perfect all the time! _Derek
1 person likes this
@toniganzon (42733)
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
Admitting our own mistakes humbles us. When the mistake is so obvious, why make another mistake by making up a story to cover it up? And I think it's also insulting the intelligence of the person you're talking to by making a lame excuse and convincing yourself that you've succeeded. Nobody is perfect anyway and who are we to judge?
• Philippines
2 Jul 11
I also had time when I made a mistake and instead of admitting it, I hid. I've broken a lot of things when I was a kid. I was always running around inside the house if I'm not outside playing with friends so I always break stuff and often times I hid from it. I knew, though, that my parents will always catch me because they always do. They knew me inside out and when I'm hiding something it's like they can smell it oozing out of me, you know how parents are.
@toniganzon (42733)
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
Lol! That's exactly how I was as a kid!
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
Yep, that's how we all were when we were kids. Whenever I see some kid running around I remember how I was then.
• Portugal
4 Jul 11
ahh good times lool i´re exactly like you... when i was a kid, i´re always opening things and never close them beacause i didnt know, and broke so many things, and most of times i didn´t admit... but i don´t know if this is a big problem(when we´r kids), because is a normal feeling...
@ravisivan (14055)
• India
6 Jul 11
yes. admitting mistakes - is tough--because I have to lower myself against the other person. Sometimes I do that because I want to please the other person--One interesting thing in life -- with our close relatives we are mentally far away -- with friends we are nearer.
@toniganzon (42733)
• Philippines
6 Jul 11
Lowering ourselves down is being humble. It's the best trait of a person that i truly admire. It's rare to see a very humble person.
@ravisivan (14055)
• India
6 Jul 11
Interesting aspect of this is that --I will lower myself before my 6 month old grand son. But not before my son aged 30+. I may not mind my grandson spitting on my face. but show anger on son when his leg hits on my leg. interesting. if the receiver is quite below us we may not mind accepting them fully.
@thanks1961 (7049)
• India
2 Jul 11
In fact I don't know hot to interpret it. I always felt bad or disappointed whenever I make a mistake and try to recover or learn some lesson from the mistakes. I it happens knowingly, it will haunt me a lot and I should tell a near one (best friend) to nullify the intensity of the issue. I have no hesitation to accept my mistakes as mistakes are human and may happen to anybody at any point of time. But how we handle the situation is important, probably not to repeat, or try to understand or anything like. So you are right. Some people just deny it and they feel they lose their image if they accept it. I have noticed many people who does this and try to purposively avoid or escape from their mistakes. Accept our mistakes, that make us humble at the same time proud also. But all can not do it. Thank-s
@toniganzon (42733)
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
Admitting a mistake is a virtue that one should learn over time. Nobody is perfect and I agree that its very humbling to admit mistakes. I notice that it's easier for me to forgive people who admitted their mistakes easily than those who pretended they didn't at first then apologized later.
• India
3 Jul 11
I know what you mean. I appreciate your way of talking. Best regards, Thank-s
@maean_19 (4662)
• Philippines
2 Jul 11
Indeed, admitting one's mistakes is difficult. It is easier for us to point a blame than seeing our mistakes. It is a selfish and self-centered mechanism on us. But if you are matured enough, you begin to learn seeing your mistakes and able to admit them. If you already know how to say sorry and admit that you have done wrong, then it shows that you have matured.
@toniganzon (42733)
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
I guess at 33 I have matured!
• Philippines
4 Jul 11
I have to agree. Wisdom comes with age. I used to avoid my mistakes when I was younger. Admitting them was so hard most especially to those people who you have hurt. Although, sometimes we cant help it maybe because of our ego and other things. Yet, as we get older. We are more forthright and honest. :)
• Philippines
22 Jul 11
People has a sense of "pride" that sometimes they found it hard to admit their mistakes. Actually if we could see the history (for those who believe in the bible), we could see that Adam(who knew that he would make mistake when he eat the fruit given to him by Eve), when asked by God why he has eaten the forbidden fruit, he does not admit it easily and blame Eve for giving him the forbidden fruit.
@toniganzon (42733)
• Philippines
22 Jul 11
I think in Adam's case that wasn't pride but it was more of an embarrassment. He was too embarrassed to admit that he had disobeyed his creator and it was true that Eve actually forced him to do so. That's why women had to suffer more than men especially in giving birth. God made that way to remind women of what EVe had done.
@MsTickle (25007)
• Australia
10 Jul 11
I don't think it's good to laugh at someone for making a mistake. If they are embarrassed or self conscious then it only makes things worse if we laugh. It's best to speak kindly and reassure people that ...it's OK, you understand what they meant.
@toniganzon (42733)
• Philippines
11 Jul 11
I don't like laughing at people's mistakes. It's true what you've said. I just hate people who knew that they've made mistakes but they just couldn't admit it even if it was already obvious. I have so much patience since i'm a teacher and i do say nicely when my students make mistakes. I never embarrassed them at all. But for a person who's old enough and is expected to own up to his mistakes, i consider that as an attitude problem.
@kfroman (86)
• United States
6 Jul 11
It's really hard for me to admit that I've made a mistake. I usually look for the blame in someone or something else before finally giving in and admitting fault. It's hurts your pride to admit you did something wrong. I need to get over it, though. Everyone makes mistakes!
@toniganzon (42733)
• Philippines
6 Jul 11
Yes nobody is perfect but once you tried owning up to your mistake, the humbling experience makes u want to be a good person and not make mistakes. Or if you do next time it would be easier. All it takes is courage. In time you will learn how. Good day!
• United States
4 Jul 11
Being able to admit mistakes is a part of being grownup. There are people who have to be right all the time no matter how wrong they are. They make mistakes and when you call them on it they say SOOOOO??! They refuse to admit when they are wrong. I feel sorry for them really. It's like they are trapped into some childish Twilight zone.
@toniganzon (42733)
• Philippines
4 Jul 11
Isn't it annoying when they say Soooo? I really can't stand people like those. I would immediately cut conversation with people like that. Thanks for sharing,
@pahak627 (4200)
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
Most of us have difficulties admitting our mistakes. There was an instance when I argued hard because I thought it was not my fault but later on I realized that I was really at fault. You know what I did? I didn't apologize I just left it as it is. Then time came that we both remembered that incident and we just laughed that out. There were still other similar incidents.
@toniganzon (42733)
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
That would depend on the situation and to whom you are talking with. In that situation you said that you weren't aware that you've made a mistake that's why you fought tooth and nail to argue your case. I would have done the same. But there are certain mistakes that are very obvious and you would immediately know that. Like in what i pointed out in my discussion. It was a language error, wrong usage of the vocabulary in the context and when i told him that it was wrong he knew already that it was. But why lie that you intentionally did that? He was caught off guard but he continued to be proud. That's not admirable at all. Thanks for sharing.
@momof3kids (1903)
• Singapore
3 Jul 11
My husband always confuses me when we argue. I had to pause to think and accuse him back. Its awful when I have to pause but sometimes i win. I meet some other men who are like that so i regard it as a weakness of theirs..lol!!
@toniganzon (42733)
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
Hmmm, men have more pride than women! I noticed that as well. Especially in countries where women are not considered equal to men.
@maharlikah (1045)
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
Pride is always at the bottom of great mistakes. There are mistakes that are just easy to admit but some are just hard. Like what he did, lol.
@toniganzon (42733)
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
The mistake that he did is not that difficult to admit since he's talking to a person whom he knows teaches ESL. On the other hand he's someone who lacks the capacity to express himself in English well.
• Portugal
3 Jul 11
Hi... I already pass to the same, and i understand how u feel...is terrible.. But yeah always is difficult admit our mistakes, and when we admit inside we feel terrible, so sometimes we choose not admit to not pass this feeling.. But if we want to live in a pretty world we need try not do mistake, but when we do that admit and make the Earth such a nice place, where don´t exist war, but everyone are friends...
@toniganzon (42733)
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
Hi there! Admitting one's mistake may be so hard to do. It is possibly because of too much pride that one cannot set aside at times like this. Well, as for me, maybe it is a little bit hard to accept I've done something wrong when I'm so damn guilty about what I did. I must go on my way and cope with it. Sometimes, one cannot seem to ask forgiveness for the mistakes he has done because he might just be "ego tripping". He wants to make others turn out to be at fault and get excused of his very own fault. On the other hand, no matter how hard he refuse to accept that he has done wrong, he knows dee inside him that he really did it wrong. He could atleast admit it to himself without letting others know about it!
@toniganzon (42733)
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
I guess he did admit to himself he made that mistake.
@Graceekwenx (3163)
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
Hahahah! True! It is soo hard to swallow pride hehehh! In fact, i sometimes tell a white lie just to weasel out! bad me!
@toniganzon (42733)
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
Have you ever talked to someone who is an expert on the subject and you made a mistake? In that situation it's very easy to apologize because you are talking to someone who will obviously noticed you've made a mistake. Because if you still deny pretending to know well, you will only feel more embarrassed in front of that person. IN that case it's easier for me to say sorry or excuse me because i don't know much about that.
@LittleMel (14059)
• Canada
3 Jul 11
we all have been there, not admitting mistakes. If I notice someone doesn't admit their mistakes, then I don't admit mine to them just to see how they take it if they're mad, I will shake the dust off my feet and move on if they're OK with it, I'll call it fair and stay friends lately, I have met more of the latter. they don't remember their promises and they don't admit their mistakes. so I made promises I don't keep and I don't admit mistakes either so far they are fine with it. so we stay friends obviously but now this 'not admitting mistakes and not keeping promises' is not so 'hot' anymore to me so I avoid these people and stick with 'hotter' people it's nice to see a healthy flow of honesty and promises kept again...
@toniganzon (42733)
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
1 person likes this
@sunnycool (12737)
• India
2 Jul 11
I wouldn't back off from confessing(provided i'm the one on the wrong side) ... i have done that before as well which i guess have costed me more than i could ever effort to loose!Its good to speak your mind out than to cover things up temporarily.Great day.
@toniganzon (42733)
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
Great. I would never admit a mistake that i have never done at all. I would put up a fight to anybody who puts the blame on me.
@Trensue (5258)
• United States
2 Jul 11
A lie is a very hard thing to fix, in fact I not certain anyone will ever recover from it. I lied to my sister and it has ruined our relationship. I can't fix it, I can not take it back. I did it. I lied. I really don't deserve her friendship. I regret it, but that is all I can do. Admitting was the easy part.
@toniganzon (42733)
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
Sorry to hear that.
@kiran8 (15348)
• Mangalore, India
2 Jul 11
Hi toni, Most people hate to admit their mistakes to others even if they know that they are in the wrong.Some of them may do it because they may feel that they become the object of ridicule and others may do it because they never want others to think that they are capable of making any mistakes in life. It is an immature reaction and as we grow we also realise that it is easier and simpler all round to admit our mistakes and also try to correct it if possible or learn from it.We become better beings and so why not? all the best and have a nice weekend
@toniganzon (42733)
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
I agree. I'm old lol!
@nurseclare (2210)
• Philippines
2 Jul 11
The first thing popped up in my mind is that HE LIKES YOU oe he wants attention from you that's why he's acting like that. I did laugh after reading yor discussion. And in my case it's easy for me to accept my mistake, it isn't really hard at all. What's wrong with telling the truth?It doesn't affect my life anyway. :)
@toniganzon (42733)
• Philippines
3 Jul 11
He made me look dumb by making such a lame excuse!! Lol!