I'm working online with a doctor

@Masihi (4228)
Canada
July 21, 2011 8:24pm CST
Yep, he's a dentist, and he's very nice, he's honest, and I'm an admin on one of his websites, and he wants to work closely with me in other marketing endeavours as he opens up more websites and makes me admin, and starts paying me over what I'm earning as a member. He's asked me for advise about his ptc site, and we've also discussed other things, like family, and culture, but mainly advertising and marketing ideas. We have a relaxed, working relationship, and I find myself being able to be myself with him, even yelling at him over stuff I don't agree with, or giving him a hard time over the idea of joining HYIP sites, and he just takes it all in stride. He also confides in me about marketing frustrations, and tells me he considers me a true friend. But one thing bothers me....he's a freaking doctor!!! People who are highly educated (ya I mentioned this before) intimidate me to no end. There were even times that I would purposely give him a hard time over an idea just to drive him away. I mean as I think about it, nobody really bothers with me here in real life, I bet if my marketing buddy was here in Canada, in my city, he wouldn't bother with me either. And before you all start posting comments saying "Oh, you're intelligent" or something like that, I'd like to say that in real life I'm so quiet, and I don't talk well that I'm a very easy person to just disappear and nobody would notice. In fact, the ONLY way a person really start to understand who I really am and what I like is via Facebook and I'm very active on Facebook. (I only have family members and close family friends on it.) I'm at a conflict about myself. In some ways I just wont the doctors and schoolteachers and lawyers and clergy and whatnot to just leave me alone and let me bum around with other welfare bums or people who aren't so educated. Yet secretly, I enjoy the intelligent conversations that I have online, I'm finding it mentally stimulating, like good food for the brain. Maybe I'm insecure or something. I mean, I truly do enjoy working with my main marketing partner...or maybe I can search for other marketing partners who are more on my level...there's an older fella in the UK that I'll be working with in a couple of months, he's on my level, nice guy to work with. I'd have to trust a person and feel comfortable with them before I actually become close with a person online, especially when dealing with finances. And my dentist marketing buddy and lower-income marketing buddy are 2 people that I can truly trust... I admit it, I'm silly, paranoid, crazy, and I probably don't make any sense at all. I don't voice all this in a conversation, or in real life, but it's just something odd that continues to eat away at me inside. It's like a mental turmoil or something. I just have to let it out sometime. I hope I don't do anything stupid, or I hope I don't end up hurting anyone's feelings. I don't mean to be like this, and I'm trying to work on my insecurities. *sigh* Doncha just love mental illness??? lol
5 responses
@GardenGerty (97918)
• United States
22 Jul 11
I will play an antagonist here and tell you that you are guilty of judging others because of the opportunities that they have had. It is just as bad as judging people over the opportunities they have not had. If he is a nice person, he is a nice person, whether he is overly educated or not. The fact is, education does not make a person intelligent,and some very educated people are just plain dumb when it comes to common sense. Give the teachers and doctors a chance you may find them to be really nice underneath.
2 people like this
@Masihi (4228)
• Canada
22 Jul 11
YEOWZERS!!! that's a pretty harsh word, there, GG, but it's probably true. I know that I'm not jealous of the educated people, but I'm ... nervous, perhaps? Ya, he is a sweetheart, and as I said I am working on my own insecurities, I do want to establish lasting marketing relationships with people I trust, and I don't want my fear to hinder me.
2 people like this
@GardenGerty (97918)
• United States
22 Jul 11
Well, you know, I say it with love, not to hurt you but rather to tell you that you are worth a million yourself, and you just do not know it.
2 people like this
@MsTickle (24962)
• Australia
24 Jul 11
GG is right my friend, you are worth a million. The lady is a good friend, through and through. Her words may seem harsh at first but look again...those words are cushioned with kindness.
1 person likes this
• United States
26 Jul 11
I would have to see am I a bit opposite of you, I personally like to voice myself, thoughts ideas. My husband tells me once in a while to be quiet, but that's just the way I am. However when it comes to posting on Facebook, I prefer to keep to myself, I just don't like to many people knowing about my personal life, who figures. I used to love Facebook, used to be on it 24/7, but for the last couple of months I find myself drifting away from it. Personally, its not that you are insecure, is just you express and manifest your feelings a bit different than most people. At first when I logged on to this site, I was a bit hesitant about expressing my thoughts on line, but I have gotten used to the idea and actually like it, and at times I still have a hard time. But if you spoke with me in person, it would be complete opposite.
1 person likes this
@Masihi (4228)
• Canada
27 Jul 11
Ahh, gotta luv MyLot, it's such a unique site that draws anyone out and I just love it here! :-D LOL I'd be sitting in a shop or room listening to 2 people gabbing away and suddenly one of them would stop and say "Izzy, what do you think?"
• United States
2 Aug 11
I completely agree this is definitely a unique site, in which I have gotten so addicted to...
1 person likes this
@edsss17 (4398)
• Philippines
22 Jul 11
Lucky you to have such a friend! Well, he's a true friend. He takes you as who you are. And it is a good thing that you can be you when you are talking with him. Its like me and my boss.. (He's happily married) I haven't him personally but we talk always online.. He is the most amazing boss a one can have! He understands me so much that sometimes I am not able to do my works because of school stuffs! Well, I think there's nothing wrong for him being a doctor though!
1 person likes this
@Masihi (4228)
• Canada
24 Jul 11
I am so happy to hear that you have an understanding boss and a close friend in him as well. That's very rare, and unfortunately not many people are like him.
@marguicha (91718)
• Chile
22 Jul 11
I love crazy people, so if you are crazy, I don´t mind. But I do mind that you don´t have fun being crazy. Don´t try to hide what you are and don´t feel ashamed of what you are. I am NOT going to tell you how wonderful you are because I´m sure I said it in another post and I hate to repeat myself. Talking to your dentist will teach you to talk better, if you think you have that problem. Now, if you talk as you write, you are there already You couldn´t posibly hurt anyone´s feelings. Leave that to ol´ witches like me.
1 person likes this
@Masihi (4228)
• Canada
22 Jul 11
Well, I do have lots of crazy fun, too!!! Well, if you get me in a conversation one-on-one, or 2 people with me, then fine, I'm more relaxed and won't stutter so much, but in a crowd, or even a roomful of people, I'll sit quietly and listen. I think people can see me listening, though Old witches, LOL!!! I wanna be an old witch, too! But seriously, you are a wonderful friend and I do appreciate your posts and discussions
• United States
22 Jul 11
Sounds like you and the doctor get along well so far as it should be between friends and or colleges. Don't think about his doctor title and maybe that will help break the block about intimidation. Seems if you can completely forget the fact that he is a doctor all will be okay. Searching for marketing type people on your level? How will you know they are unless you socialize and mingle with them. So what I suggest is doing that, treat them as if they/all were ordinary people and you may not feel any sort of intimidation. If the doctor gets along with you then I think he is not concerned as to which level you are. I know it is not easy but take relax a little and outshine whomever as maybe you are being too hard on yourself.
1 person likes this
@Masihi (4228)
• Canada
22 Jul 11
It is true, I am very hard on myself, although there's sometimes I forget about his title/level of education, then it comes back to me.