Your dress sense - is it cultivated or has it come by birth

@vandana7 (66882)
India
July 22, 2011 6:04am CST
I've been thinking..which I rarely do nowadays. But I do. So which came first, you wanting a specific type of dress or you developed a desire for it after you saw the dress on somebody else and thought it looked pretty. I also want to know if we can condition our minds into accepting that something is pretty. I say so because I honestly love Indian music. Its kind of hard for me to accept western music to that extent. I guess my mind is conditioned into believing that this is what is good about music. It is people who have told me that this is good music. I didnt like it on my own. So my tastes are developed in that direction. What do you think? Were you born with certain tastes, or are the tastes cultivated in you - I mean did you find the dress beautiful on Angelina Jolie and wanted to wear it, or would you have bought it anyway even if it was not a trendy stuff.
3 people like this
18 responses
@saphrina (31739)
• South Africa
22 Jul 11
Hello ma. Let me see. I wear what i feel comfy in. Don't really care whether it's fashionable or not. But i'm sure i can beat nay of those sticky models today. I don't wear according to what others wear, that's boring and so last year. If someone tell me about whatever song, no matter what country or culture, i'll listen to it, but i don't always like it. I have peculiar tastes. That's why i'm freaking blonde. Sorry, i won't wear anything jolie wears.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (164507)
• Garden Grove, California
22 Jul 11
hi saphy good for you. I am also my own person,. my friend nelda say you need a hair cut. okay so I am wearing my hair long as it looks better on me than a manish hair cut and okay I am elderly but what law says elderly cannot wear long hair? as for Angelina whats her face no not me I do not copy celebs at all. I am my own person so I seldom follow anyone else's tastes at all.
@saphrina (31739)
• South Africa
23 Jul 11
Hi Hatley Yip, why do we need others to tell us anything. We are our own person and need to stick to that.
@vandana7 (66882)
• India
23 Jul 11
You got it wrong again sweetheart!!! You are a freaking blonde that is why you have peculiar tastes, got it? But here is my question to you. I finally got it more clearly. Do you like a dress because somebody appreciated you in it or something similar, or do you like a dress because you want to wear it for your pleasure. Honest.
@surekharathi (14134)
• India
22 Jul 11
Friend I cant understand your topic please again in short explain it. I think my eng is week so this problem is arise. But I love my tradition and my country so never copied to another.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (164507)
• Garden Grove, California
22 Jul 11
hi maybe I can help she is talking about one's likes and dislikes'in choosing clothing. and from the clothes I have seen Indian women wear I have fallen in love with some of the gorgeous colors you wear and the graceful garments you all wear. so stick to your traditions as they are lovely ones.
• India
23 Jul 11
Thanks friend now I understand what she is saying now I will give my response. She wants talking about likes and dislikes of cloths.
@vandana7 (66882)
• India
23 Jul 11
Yes, Hatley is right. I am asking whether you genuinely like the clothes you wear, or whether you are buying them because one of your favorite models, or actresses wore it. Something like that. And whether you genuinely like music of other cultures, or whether you would prefer Indian film music, or Indian classical. What do you think are your reasons for such preferences.
@thesids (22358)
• Bhubaneswar, India
22 Jul 11
Hi vandanaji I love the taste of salt and Indian spices (though I cannot feast on the later now) I always followed my own dress sense all throughout. No one could ever get me the clothes that I wanted. I remember when they were wearing the trendy parallels in college I was stuck with a little baggies kind of stuff and even today, I love larger sizes when it comes to shirts and Tees. And I always prefer cotton to any other kind with lighter and plain shades on the top (shirts)than anything else. Hard to change my preferences but I see no reason to wear what Angelina or Bradd Pitt wore... why should I opt for dresses already worn by anyone else
1 person likes this
@vandana7 (66882)
• India
23 Jul 11
You have my kind of tastes thesids. But the market does not always move as per our tastes, does it? :) As to Brangelina's attire, you'd be surprised how many would want to wear something like they wear. How are you doing? When are you dropping in to say hello to me? Hoping it would be soon enough.
@thesids (22358)
• Bhubaneswar, India
23 Jul 11
Of course, we will visit Hyderabad sometime in Sept or Oct (but this time we plan to visit Shree Shirdi Sai Dham) and on return Hyderabad is in. These days, there is no internet for me and we are shifting to another place on 31st (hopefully - this word due to the rains here). For the Brangelina's attire, yes, I see many getting into pantaloons and other fashion showrooms and move out with huge amounts invested in their dresses. Good for many. I still give my tailor a headache and he says - I am one of his oldest customers
@vandana7 (66882)
• India
27 Jul 11
Ok then. When you come here, you stay with us. Ok? I hope you still have my number. I will PM you. I will even send my address. Just tell me when you are arriving. we will pick you. Wouldnt I love some guinea pigs? LOL And dont worry. I have a maid. She cooks. So you wouldn't be a bother.
@bhanusb (5709)
• India
22 Jul 11
Hi vandana, someone wear certain dress. It's a matter of taste. Taste developed by culture,education and outlook.Not come by birth. Indian women usually do not wear a dress which exposes a certain part of their body. Because Indian culture does not allow such dress. It is true, everyone wants to wear some dresses by which he/she will be looked attractive.That also depends on his/her taste.
@vandana7 (66882)
• India
23 Jul 11
I guess if somebody appreciated how I looked in western outfit, I would automatically start liking that kind of clothes. It may follow that we like that feeling of appreciation when we sing songs that others can enjoy. Therefore, we would prefer to sing Indian songs in a place where everybody was into Indian music, and western songs in a place where others were not aware of Indian music. In other words, is it our liking or our need for being appreciated that prompts us to look for specific types of clothes or music.
@akp100 (13327)
• India
22 Jul 11
Hi Vandana :) About my dressing sense.. I think its worse from starting. I mean i have my taste in other things. But when i go for shopping for my clothes i always go with my sister. She always choose me what shirt will suit me more. So yes I do dressing after seeing others dressing or go for others advice.
@vandana7 (66882)
• India
23 Jul 11
Want an honest confession? I get too confused when I go shopping for clothes. I like many things but most of the time, it is like this would have been better if...and at times I find very nice pieces. I wonder why others didnt like them. Guess, I do have specific tastes, but I dont know how to blend them with what is available in the market, at least not very easily. :)
@Buchi_bulla (8299)
• India
22 Jul 11
Certain tastes come due to our proximity to them like carnatic music as you told. My elders used to listen to carnatic music and used to discuss about ragas. So I am familiar with many carnatic music songs and developed a liking for them. My children are fond of pop songs, western music etc. so I like them too as I keep listening to them at home. My dress sense has not changed much. I am what I am since childhood. I wear only traditional dress which is saree. But I started wearing couple of churidar sets and nighties as after marriage husband got it for me when he went out of station and I wear it sometimes. So changes do come without our noticing it.
@vandana7 (66882)
• India
23 Jul 11
We change I agree. But honestly, pop songs or karnatic music. Suppose nobody was around in the room, which of the two would you have preferred to listen. And choice between costly Churidar set and Kanjeevaram set.
@ravisivan (14055)
• India
22 Jul 11
In transactional analyais by Dr., Eric Berne we read about parent, adult and child ego states. Desire comes under child ego state. it is momentous. however it is formed due to teaching given by parents and out of our parent ego state. My critical parent ego will say - to wear a dress exposing one front or back is wrong. (my parents taught me so) to eat non vegetarian good is bad (my parents taught me) You should not tell lies, you should not wound others, don't take favours from others without reason (all taught -critical parent)
1 person likes this
@vandana7 (66882)
• India
23 Jul 11
When I started the discussion I too had the same thoughts. I was thinking of Indian music, and why I would turn towards some Hindi song preferably old numbers even if there was some Shakira number or Jennifer Lopez, or Backstreet boys in another channel. Nostalgia may have something to do with it. But as we grow up, perhaps, when we see our favorite relatives wear some type of clothes, or designs, invariably we start liking such type of clothes or designs, without anybody asking us to like them. This is particularly true if the relative or friend happens to be somebody sophisticated, and is treated as such in family. So if the relative is foreign returned, we subconsciously note his or her clothes more closely than we would note those of others. Likewise, anybody accomplished or beautiful in the family or friend circle get the same treatment. At least, I think so. I went shopping the other day. And as I was selecting I recalled some prints that I'd seen on one such relatives, and I thought that was good. I got that additional moment to reflect whether I truly liked it, or was I under such influence. I realized I didnt really like it, and so I was able to walk away from that piece.
@SomeCowgirl (32270)
• United States
22 Jul 11
I have a dress sense? Someone call the cops I'm dangerous!! lol, I'm kidding I'm kidding! I don't have a dress sense, if it fits and I think it's pretty, regardless of if Angelina Jolie wore it or some news anchor on t.v.! I do my shopping at the lower end stores. I am partial to Camoflauge though.
1 person likes this
@hora_fugit (5439)
• India
23 Jul 11
I am not much into dressing, that is I don't yet know what looks great on me. So I buy a dress which appeals to me, at the store. If someone is wearing a nice dress, I may admire it but never thought like 'oh! I want one like this!' I may from now on. And anyway, my tastes are not bad in this regard. As for the music and movies, I'm highly influenced by people around me (translate to siblings) and still coming out of liking whatever they like. I loved Indian music a lot, but rarely find anything appealing now a days. Even the ones I used to like don't feel so good now. I get impatient so easily. So, tastes come by birth, really? Hmm... I thought they grow along with us. I hated a lot of things I am tolerant to now. Be it whatever
@vandana7 (66882)
• India
25 Jul 11
Hello sweetie, how are you doing? How is your health? Long time. :) I think at times others opinion does change the way we dress. Rather quite often. We tend to move in step with times, isn't it? Because we dont want to look odd. I too feel the same way about some of the old Hindi numbers, which were once my favorites. :)
1 person likes this
• India
26 Jul 11
I'm fine and my health is on the other side of sine curve. :) My sisters were recently probing all the copy materials in songs, you may like some songs such as One Way Ticket. I don't know....
@allknowing (68894)
• India
22 Jul 11
It is only when the 'caviar and toast'becomes a part of you that you relish it. In other words what we do not have in our life we will not acquire a taste for it and it is only when we have access to it that we are able to pick and choose. And this normally happens gradually. I never saw the likes of 'gucci' outfits when I could really wear them. It is too late now!
@vandana7 (66882)
• India
23 Jul 11
Ok.. so would you have preferred to wear them over traditional Kanjeevaram. :)
@allknowing (68894)
• India
23 Jul 11
I have been exposed to a world where western clothes formed a part of everyone's attire. Kajeevarams and other Indian attire did form a part of that too. Pant suits, maxis (they were in fashion when I was in my twenties), salvars, jeans, slacks and such, made up my wardrobe. At the end of the day vandana it is the exposure more than anything else that decides the kind of taste one has some acquired and some accepted to glide with the atmosphere one is in.
@vandana7 (66882)
• India
23 Jul 11
I agree..it is the exposure. So it is not necessarily this is good, this I like better, or this is what I want. It is simply the need to belong or blend into the group in which we are. At least that is how I am analyzing my likings.
@SIMPLYD (81659)
• Philippines
23 Jul 11
My dress sense is acquired. Whatever is the fashion, i try it to myself. Styles that can make me look nice, are the style that i will stick to after. Yes, when i see some actress wearing a nice stuff, i would like them to myself too, so i would canvass for a similar one. I am open to what is the current fashion, as long as it will look good on me.
@vandana7 (66882)
• India
25 Jul 11
I couldnt agree more. Most of us are like that. In fact, it is hard to find the kind of dresses we would like to wear, so we generally dont even think about it. :)
@jennyze (7048)
• Indonesia
26 Jul 11
I guess both are correct. We were born with a certain taste and along the way we would cultivate a special taste that is ours. Of course some people are not lucky enough to only develop the likeness after seeing the dress on someone else. Usually, when I see something pretty on someone else I would say: She has the same taste as I, but I would not copy a 100% of he design but I would make it special that would fit to my not proportioned body....
@jazel_juan (15767)
• Philippines
23 Jul 11
I always wanted to believe that i was born with my own sense of style. I could remember arguing with my mom on what to wear because she would suggest outfits that i would find horrible lol and she would find what i wear horrible as well. Till NOW! But cannot help it, i will not wear it unless i am comfortable with it even if it means other people will not like it. Who cares? it is me wearing it not you and i feel good in it. Just like that red dress i wore to a party last month. My mom thought it was horrible! SO i just ignored her.
@surekharathi (14134)
• India
23 Jul 11
Friend I have not seen your discussion since long time where you were going. Yes I love my tradition. I never attract from any western culture dress. Because according to my opinion dress is not important only nature is important rich men is also eating food and poor men is also eating food not special. I like my tradition and in our tradition after marriage wear the saree so I love this dress. I never attract on dresses or cloths of others.
• India
23 Jul 11
hi every one in my family loves my dressing sense its almost by birth i wear sarees that i design on my own so everyone love this unique pattern also its something on my own and some adapted from my mom she is a designer so it never makes a difference for me what anyone else is wearing and i am not a copy cat.
@thetis74 (1525)
22 Jul 11
Oh I was born of varied taste I guess. I love anything that satisfies my senses. I love different kinds of music if I find the tune to be lovely. I am Filipino, but I love some off the songs of this Indian girl named alishya. I sing the made in india, lover girl and tu kahan. I also like some japanese, korean, spanish, latin songs, etc. As for clothes, I also wear anything that looks good on me. I don't mind if it is out of fashion or new or whatever. Just be yourself and do anything you want and enjoy life. As long as your not hurting anyone then nothing can go wrong.
@ElicBxn (60895)
• United States
22 Jul 11
I can love the dress but not want to wear it. I can also say that the first time I heard Chinese music I fell in love with it, and its certainly not what my ear was brought up listening to... On the other hand, while I love "story songs" I hate the sound of most blue grass music and the "country/folk" singers who have that nasal tone to their voices... I love the look of saris but I wouldn't wear one, tho I'd LOVE to have some of the sari cloth! I don't think you are born with certain tastes, but I also don't think its entirely learned. I think things find chords in our hearts/minds/souls that make even unfamiliar things enjoyable...
@Hatley (164507)
• Garden Grove, California
22 Jul 11
hi vandy I have always been my own person developing my own tastes based on what I see that looks pretty to me even if its not in style as i hate having others trying to change me. I think I have good dress sense and I developed it by watching colors in nature and by trying on different colors. most of us are either spring,summer winter or fall in the colors that look good on us. there is a scheme for this and i followed it and found I was a summer type person in coloring of hair and skin.I have never been one to give a fig in hell as to what some movie star wore. I love colors , pastels and deep colors but not muddied colors at all.I have always taken time in buying clothes to try on something that does not really appeal to me as sometimes I can wear something I would not ordinarily wear.