Acquaintance and friendship, as they say it right?

@rifnee (1713)
Indonesia
July 24, 2011 3:05am CST
Hello I have a problem. I like to enjoy my time alone reading, listening to music, Internet, etc. Now I've made ??some acquaintances in the house. We talk very well and have similar interests. But it bothers me and annoys me, that is now constantly ringing the doorbell and they are virtually self-invite. I would not go so far. How do I say this now right that they do not get it the wrong way and I can continue chatting with them in the stairwell, on the road, but not in the apartment. I myself know no counsel
4 people like this
10 responses
@jaiho2009 (39019)
• Philippines
24 Jul 11
Open the door and said politely that you are busy. And tell them that you will give them a call once you are free. Then,if you saw them outside and asks why you are not giving them a call,simply reply with "i am still busy with my projects/or i need to finish some paper works" that is why I am not around buzzing the street these days.
@rifnee (1713)
• Indonesia
25 Jul 11
ok, that sounds like a good idea for me, at least it can overcome current annoyance. For the next issue I might not know how to cope. Do I have to go on and on like this.
1 person likes this
@jaiho2009 (39019)
• Philippines
26 Jul 11
of course not dear, (hehehe) surely they will noticed that you are giving them same alibi. try another excuse like,your cousin is having some vacation,or maybe your mom is not feeling well (hahaha) i am sure they will not bug you anymore if they are sensitive enough to feel that you don't want to be disturbed jaiho®
• Philippines
25 Jul 11
You have to be upfront with them about what you really feel but don't sound rude towards them. I know they will understand. Tell them that you need time alone and what they are doing is making you feel uncomfortable. Make sure you tell them that it's not really them but it's you.
@toniganzon (49946)
• Philippines
25 Jul 11
Sorry but i've got something else to do and i'd rather stay alone by myself! I think i would say that kind of thing, but i know that would offend them or hurt them. I think i would be polite at first and welcome them in, but as we sit and talk, i'd point out my opinion then. I'd tell them there are times that i'd rather be alone and sometimes just don't feel having guests at home. This is actually how i would say it: "I suck as a host and i'm not good at entertaining guests at home, so i don't usually invite people in. So if you happen to come by and would suddenly surprise me, it just makes me feel so awkward and so guilty because i won't be able to entertain you. Would you mind giving me that time to prepare and be a good hosts? Who knows someday i'll just call you and invite you in? But as of the moment, i suck at this and would rather stay be alone."
@naija4real (1293)
24 Jul 11
my dear rifnee, it is your whole life you have to brace up to the challenge and draw the line and note their limit. You just have to tell them that you need some privacy and let them respect you for that.
• United States
24 Jul 11
I personally wouldn't let anyone in unless they were invited first because I don't when people randomly show uninvited, it irks me quite much. However one of my friends who is on the shy side doesn't really mind it at all. At least a phone call would be nice before just arriving.
@ellebj (784)
• Philippines
24 Jul 11
you can tell them directly, so that you will know.. maybe you could tell them first that if they want to go at your place, they should ask your permission because sometimes you are busy and you have things to do.. or maybe tell them slowly and slowly..
@ebuscat (5949)
• Philippines
24 Jul 11
For me it is right if you have a consent to your family obscures to your parents.
• Indonesia
24 Jul 11
Just say it, the whole thing to you that is a little too much and love you again a little more time for yourself want / need. Be honest, because even if you are the people abwimmelst the next few days, they try it again sometime and you will not be able to say no. Make it clear that it has nothing to do with them personally. Honesty is the best policy.
• Indonesia
24 Jul 11
I would not open initially. I think you do not always clarify a psychoanalytic interview. If you open your no longer reduced to one probably also the ringing. The also do not want useless always run through the house and back again. I think that would suffice for now. You can always still further greet and talk with them on the road. I mean, that's just the Internet. If no one wants to have closer contact, can not always respond to emails or anything. ;-)
@gengeni (3308)
• Indonesia
24 Jul 11
And if you do not open your door may simply be, if thou hast no need of society? Otherwise, you can indeed say that you sometimes fall asleep during the day and therefore it would be nice to not ring when there is nothing important. If you do not want to lie, then probably only help either telling the truth or a few times with no reason, no time, so they may understand it by yourself. And how to tell the truth. "Folks, you're pretty cool, but I'm honestly someone who is not so sure, and often make things together, do not be angry with me if I somehow did not feel like company, ok?"