Do you think being angry is the solution of problem ???

@akp100 (13289)
India
August 7, 2011 7:19am CST
Hello Friends Personally my nature is quite clam. I mean I rarely become angry on anything. But I have seen many people who becomes very angry in any kind of problem. I mean in small problems too. I don't think any problem can be solved by being angry. I really feel bad when people do this. May be because of my nature. Do you think this kind of short temper can be some kind of illness ? I mean becoming very very angry on small things.. What you think ?
9 people like this
59 responses
@saphrina (31740)
• South Africa
7 Aug 11
Hi sweetie. Anger never solved any problem and probably never will. But, it seem to work for me though.
1 person likes this
@akp100 (13289)
• India
7 Aug 11
Cool then.. I guess I should try that way too.
1 person likes this
@saphrina (31740)
• South Africa
7 Aug 11
Testy, aren't we?
1 person likes this
@akp100 (13289)
• India
7 Aug 11
Not me.. You are saying that it works for you then may be i should try when needed.
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Aug 11
Hi My name is Sarah and I have a hair trigger temper.I don't get to use it these days but it is still there. One my button is pushed I get Furious. It may be over what others think is little but it isn't little to me. The last time I laid into my friend for sending me a chain letter. But that worked out. If I had been calm and just deleted it, he wouldn't have know Never to send me another chain letter so my anger did help.But I can see where pure fury can be dangerous and destructive.
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@akp100 (13289)
• India
8 Aug 11
You are still that kind of. You should control it.
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Aug 11
You make a really good point here, Sarah - what might seem to be a "little thing" to one person might be a big thing to another. We all come from different backgrounds and have different personalities and experiences which can influence how we interpret things and can affect what things we will and will not tolerate. You mentioned that you really dislike chain letters, for instance. I don't like them, but they are not a "big deal" for me. Dishes that can be just rinsed out after use and put in the strainer to dry, on the other hand, is one of my triggers. I have to do several loads of dishes per day, so the ones that can just be rinsed out and left to dry so that I can put them away when I go to do dishes cuts down on my workload by a lot - it takes a minute for them to rinse the dish and put it in the strainer but it cuts down on my time by twice that (per dish) because it saves me from having to wash and dry them. Someone else might view that as just a "little thing", though.
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@akp100 (13289)
• India
8 Aug 11
Yeah.. Two people don't think like same. And may be the person who i am talking about is the same case. May be I think there is small thing but it may be big to him. But still staying angry most of time will surely hurts the health. So better be cool.
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@inertia4 (27385)
• United States
11 Aug 11
Anger is not a problem solver. It might satisfy the inner need for the moment, but it will never solve a thing. Let the anger pass, calm down and then look at the situation logically.
@akp100 (13289)
• India
11 Aug 11
True that we should let pass the anger instead of storing in. Because its not good for health. But over anger(like shouting) I mean being anger in small things is really not done. May be its satisfy the inner need but what about others.. They suffers with that too.
1 person likes this
@inertia4 (27385)
• United States
12 Aug 11
We have to control ourselves before we could worry about others. If we don't let the anger go, we cannot help anyone else release the anger.
@akp100 (13289)
• India
12 Aug 11
True. But do you think doing this all the time even in small problems is good..!!!
• Singapore
7 Aug 11
nope, it's not an illness! It's just a matter of how people control their feelings and emotions that's all. It's good that you are a calm person and that, to me, I should be able to say that you can make wise decisions and choices and you solve problems easily without any difficulty. Believe me, getting angry will only make the matter even worst as anger will affect whatever choices you make and hinder your future too. Getting angry at the smallest of things is also bad and how will people see you? They will view you as someone who loses his/her temper easily and are not an easy person to work with. People who get angry easily will have few friends. Fights, especially, will be the thing that angry people encounter most. As for me, last time I used to be angry at trivial matters but with the influence of my friend, who is a calm person, I began to learn how to control my anger and think carefully before getting angry and jump to conclusions and act rashly. Well, for those who get angry at minor things, they can go for anger management courses and I think that helps most. It teaches them a lot of things on the human emotion but I think anger can be managed by oneself. Anger, when go uncontrolled, will become a big problem and thus create a major 'disaster'.
1 person likes this
@akp100 (13289)
• India
7 Aug 11
Totally Agree. Surely anger makes things more worse. And yes that kind of nature makes the bad impact of the person on other people. So better be clam in any situation and its the best way to solve major problems.
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@Hatley (164755)
• Garden Grove, California
8 Aug 11
hi calm not clam calm is an emotion clam is a seafood okay?
@akp100 (13289)
• India
8 Aug 11
oopssss. Sorry..
@topffer (33192)
• France
7 Aug 11
This kind of temper is often feigned in Southern France : you think that a person is really angry on anything, when this person is inwardly cold like an ice-cube. Faking anger can be part of a culture, so it is difficult to speak of illness. I believe that anger is an illness if a person cannot control it and becomes dangerous for others...
1 person likes this
@akp100 (13289)
• India
7 Aug 11
I am totally agree on that. Its really become terrible for others. Fake Anger.. That's more dangerous than illness.. Better people don't do that on purpose.
@akp100 (13289)
• India
7 Aug 11
Like saphy write above...
• United States
7 Aug 11
People actually fake anger?! Personally, I do not feel the need to fake anything ... there is nothing artificial or fake here.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
7 Aug 11
I don't think getting angry is the solution to most problems. In fact, I think we should calm ourselves down when it comes to solving any problems we have. It helps us on thinking straight and devising the best possible solution to that particular problem.
1 person likes this
@akp100 (13289)
• India
7 Aug 11
Yes staying clam will surely help us to solve problems.. As we can think about the solutions. While becoming angry can cause make troublesome situation than it is.
• Philippines
7 Aug 11
Yep, that's right. Being angry can just multiply the problems you have.
1 person likes this
@akp100 (13289)
• India
7 Aug 11
@francesca5 (1344)
8 Aug 11
you have started an interesting discussion here akp100. i think the problem is that anger is sometimes the right response to someone or something, and sometimes it is not. and the trouble is it is quite hard to use it appropriately. sometimes i have found that the people i should really be very angry with are the people i'm not angry enough with, because they manage to manipulate. whereas sometimes when we can't express our anger in the way we really want to, or to the person we really want to express our anger to, then if some poor unfortunate soul presses the wrong button then we take that anger out on them. i think the key to managing anger is to use it properly. to be appropriately anger with those who really deserve it, and not get angry with those who don't. but acheiving that is an extremely hard thing to do...........................
1 person likes this
@akp100 (13289)
• India
8 Aug 11
Well its depend on the situation I think. I mean when its really needed surely we should be without hesitation. But when we can handle the situation without it then better stay calm. Surely more anger is not good for health. so better we avoid it. Thanks for the response.
@Tanitac (44)
• South Africa
8 Aug 11
I would say that I am like you in that I don't get angry very easily. I have to be super upset and stomped on to be in a mood to shout. I believe that being calm and talking about the problem with someone rather than shouting at them is the best soltuion to any issue. As soon as people start shouting, words get misinterpreted and the shouting just gets worse. Talking calmy allows people to see all sides to a problem and being able to discuss it without causing any further problems. As for it being a disease, well no I don't think so unless maybe we are talking about very extreme cases where someone is constantly angry rather than angry because of specific situations. All people are different and we are taught in different ways when growing up and we deal with different situations throughout our lives. These different environmenst makes us all unique and this includes the way we deal with problems. Some shout, some dont and in my case I just wait for the person to calm down and hope they are willing to deal with the problem with me and not against me.
1 person likes this
@akp100 (13289)
• India
8 Aug 11
Great response. Solving problem by understanding each other and by sitting together is the best way to overcome any problem or misunderstanding. In such situation anger makes only situation more worse. Don't know about it is disease or not but surely more anger is not good for health. I like you response. Thanks for sharing.
1 person likes this
@shskumbla (3341)
• India
8 Aug 11
yes, I agree with you ! Even I think that becoming angry often may lead to some illness. But I personally won't become angry. Even if I become angry its not more than a minute, I'm sure.. I actually hate 'becoming angry'. I want to be friendly with all..! thats all.
@akp100 (13289)
• India
8 Aug 11
That's quite good that you can control your anger and you having friendly nature. That's the best way to live life calmly. Being angry unnecessary is not the good thing. I don't know whether its due to illness or what but surely its not good for health.
1 person likes this
@kalav56 (11503)
• India
8 Aug 11
Anger can only blind one's eyes and prevent a person from thinking well to solve a problem.We do need to be calm and even when we get perturbed or worried, we lack clear thought. People get angry due to many reasons , one being a mismatch in fulfiment and expectation. SOme people get angry when others interfere with their plans and this cannot be counted as wrong because each individual \has a right to personal space. I think it is not an illness but a shortcoming that has been nurtured over a period of many years. Some children throw tantrums, scream and get small thing s done when they are very young and when adults give in. THis becomes a habit. When it is curbed it cannot be allowed to flourish and thrive. When it is not curbed it is alowed to grow and as adults people continue with the same habit. It is good that you have a calm nature but see that this calm nature is not exploited by people who show temper and try to get things done.
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@akp100 (13289)
• India
8 Aug 11
Well... I always back up when someone(from family) tries to be anger on me. But gets angry sometimes, Depends on the situation. But its too rare. May be my nature is that kind of. Surely there are many factors that making people short temper. May be because of some dark past and other. But they and other should try to be calm.
1 person likes this
@salonga (27998)
• Philippines
8 Aug 11
Even a fool when he holds his peace is counted wise, according to one Proverb so I believe being easily angered is not good. Nevertheless to get angry is a natural reaction and it is not bad to get angry specially if it is reasonable provided one knows how to avoid sinning. We can get angry without committing sin anyway. And that is by learning how to be short-tempered. As much as possible we should manage our anger so that it will not reach to the point of hurting or cursing. When we get angry it should always be to show we don't condone wrong things and not to add more problem by adding trouble instead of solution.
1 person likes this
@akp100 (13289)
• India
8 Aug 11
Very true.. Its part of our life. But people should be able to control it too, and make sure that they are not hurting others with this nature. Any situation can be handle calmly. When the need of being angry we can.
8 Aug 11
I think it's normal to get angry if there's enough reason to feel that, but not to the extent that it can harm other people. like me I become angry when someone is lying to me or someone is hurting my family, but in some small faults I don't usually get angry that easy. and you're attitude is nice, being calm in most situation is a nice traits to have.
1 person likes this
@akp100 (13289)
• India
8 Aug 11
People should be when it is necessary. But unnecessary being angry is not done. If we can handle any situation calmly then better we don't be angry till needed.. Thanks for the response.
@Rick1950 (1546)
• Lima, Peru
7 Aug 11
I think it's a bad behaviour to become angry on small things. But it could happen. To become angry mean that you can't control your emotions. To be bad tempered is a kind of adiction - a kind of illness.
@akp100 (13289)
• India
8 Aug 11
Yes.. may be. But its too bad. I mean they hurts others too with their nature. People should handle problems by being calm.
@thetis74 (1525)
7 Aug 11
It is a natural thing to be angry. We are born with one of those emotions. And we should be equipped on how emotions like these are controlled. Anger can be a good thing. It is does however solve a problem but it can be a tool that helps or motivates the person to try to solve any situation in life. Although it is much better to be calm, many people still can't help getting angry
1 person likes this
@akp100 (13289)
• India
8 Aug 11
Surely its a part of human's life. But keep getting angry in small things is surely not a normal one. We can solve our problems calmly easily in compare of being angry. And some times this being angry makes the problem more worse. So better take care of problem with cool mind.
@veedee13 (242)
• United States
7 Aug 11
Being angry at something is not going to solve anything.As a matter of fact,i think it contributes more to the problem.Being calm and dealing with it the mature way will solve it.It's hard to be calm when you have a problem but just take a deep breathe and take a few moment to calm down.
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@akp100 (13289)
• India
8 Aug 11
Yes sometimes it creates more problems then solving the original one. So yes better be calm in life to handle the situations.
@tenrajj (911)
• Bhutan
7 Aug 11
You have got a cool nature. Even be I rarely get angry. I don't think being angry will solve any problem be it large or small. Instead anger will create more complicated and tougher problems. There is one saying,"anger needs only 'D' to become danger". It is always good to be calm and solve problem in calm environment. Anger will never solve any kind of problem. Instead getting angry will let us lose your happy moments. Our anger may also spoil the other peoples mood. It may also spoil the good environment around. We should never show our anger to others. There is a good saying,"we can't hide our bad looks but we can always hide our bad anger". So we must always try to hide your bad anger.
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@akp100 (13289)
• India
8 Aug 11
Good response. Agree with you. Being angry will not solve the problem. But it can make it worse. While staying cool in that situation will surely give some idea to overcome that problem. So better be calm till we can.
@mods196621 (3631)
• Philippines
7 Aug 11
Not at all times it helps but there are times you need to be angry with a purpose. Most people cannot control themselves to get angry and this the nature of every one of us. This is the part of our emotions and when it attacks us let this anger be controllable by us if not there are lot of things possible to happen. There are lots of things that anger can help like for disciplinary actions taken that need this emotion. And it depend upon the situation.
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@akp100 (13289)
• India
8 Aug 11
Being angry on purpose for some work is okay. But being angry in small things where that kind of attitude is totally unnecessary , its surely not a normal thing. Staying cool is the best way to get out of the major problems.
• United States
7 Aug 11
Anger is NOT a solution. It's a reaction. Being short tempered has many causes. Maybe their frustrations in life are piled up and every little thing comes in the way of solving those problems. Another reason would be the lifestyle they live and the food they eat. For the most part though, being angry does not provide any solutions. Those kinds of people just need to learn to listen to other people and not just be angry for the sake of being angry, which is a lost cause. I know a lot of family members who are like this, and I'm glad they don't actually STAY angry. Of course, the people surrounding them get affected and I've gotten that concern across. It has worked, but you can't exactly expect change to happen overnight. As for me, I get angry but I make sure that, in the way of getting my opinion across, I don't hurt anyone. Also, I've made it a point that if ever I really am angry at someone, I write them an email that discusses every angle of the issue at hand. So far, I've got great responses and those relationships have strengthened. So it's okay to be angry. Just don't hurt anyone and don't let it invade your personality.
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@akp100 (13289)
• India
7 Aug 11
That's quite good that you don't hurt others by your nature. Its true that with this angry nature people makes suffer others more in compare of them self. So its a quite bad thing. And surely anger makes situation more worse. Instead of that better keep our cool and think about proper solution.
@waflay (2717)
• Nairobi, Kenya
7 Aug 11
Personally I'm not short tempered but I have a friend who can easily go mad because just a small thing. It usually results from misunderstanding of what I say or do to this person. Taking negative point of view to start throwing my things against the wall, yelling on top of his voice. Its so bad. I does not help solve any issue.
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@akp100 (13289)
• India
7 Aug 11
Yes.. Such things make issue more worse instead of solving. So better take on any problem clamly.. It is the best way to handle problems. That's what I think.
• Bangladesh
7 Aug 11
Anger should never be a solution rather its harmful everyone. Short tamper varies from man to man.I think its not a illness.I had also short tamper,but I conrtoled it by myself.Everyday I practiced to calm down myself and now I get the result.
@akp100 (13289)
• India
7 Aug 11
That's really great that you able to control it now. Yes its not a solution of any problem.. In fact it can cause more health related problem. So better be clam unless its real needed.. I am totally agree with you.
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