Ex-Friend

@Tina30219 (27256)
Onaway, Michigan
August 18, 2011 9:14am CST
I have a friend that is in the system and she got her son taken away and just got him back. Well Monday night she wa texting me telling me she is going to kill herself and let me say she has done this before. I called CPS on her and turned her in. Also to top it off she is pregnant and shee does not want the baby or the son she has now. I have known her since our kids we're 2 years old and I have had to call the cops on her before for the same reason. She lies her way out of things with them. Her workers told her and her son not too talk to me anymore I am mean for doing this. She also called me the B word and told me thanks alot for stopping me from having an abortation just another kid to bring into my crazy life. She needs mental help but will not admit she needs help. She told her 9 year old son she does not love him not to call her mom no more. He cried me the other night crying because he doe not want to go back into foster care. I am being told I done the right thing from all my friends and family. I have cut my ties with her deleted her from my phone and everything.
6 people like this
16 responses
• Philippines
18 Aug 11
Hello Tina30219, I guess you did the right thing. Bothering your self to someone who doesn't even take her own self a business is just a waste of time and worries. She is so pathetic to do ans=d say such things that is I think beyond her sanity. I don't know the reason why she told her son that she doesn't love him and tell him not to call her mom. It could be traumatic for a child to hear his very own mother treat you like you were never a part of her whole being. She is not worth it. So it is just right to stay away from a woman like that. Goodluck!
@Tina30219 (27256)
• Onaway, Michigan
19 Aug 11
Thanks I know she has mental issues and so does the people that are on her case they are trying to get her on medicine but she says it does not help it makes her worse which is a bunch of crap. You are so rigt she is so not worth my time.
1 person likes this
@maximax8 (27048)
18 Aug 11
You do not need to suffer these phone calls anymore. You are so sensible for phoning the police on the previous times this sort of thing has happened. Well done for cutting ties with her and deleting her from your phone. She sounds like she already has mental problems and now the emotional changes in pregnancy haven't given her any favors. I feel ever so sorry for her 9 year old son and her yet to be born baby. She needs therapy so good luck to her.
2 people like this
@Tina30219 (27256)
• Onaway, Michigan
19 Aug 11
I have to cut ties with her because her emotional stress is not good on me I have health issues of my own. The people I feel so sorry for iis her 9 year old son and unborn baby they do not deserve this mess.
1 person likes this
@koperty3 (1877)
18 Aug 11
It seams that this woman is really insane. Why they allow her to have her son back. She can be dangerous for him. And this is not healthy situation when you see everyday how your mother going insane more and more. Who knows what she is doing to her son and what she is saying to him. She can really destroyed his childhood or even life. Where are child services in this case? It's just horrible. I feel sorry for her son and this unborn baby.
2 people like this
@Tina30219 (27256)
• Onaway, Michigan
19 Aug 11
Stowyk exactly bad mother all around I wish they woould not have given her son back to her she does not deserve to have him this child deserves to be with someone that loves him. I love this child I wish I could take him but I have 2 kids with disabiltys and I definitely do not need to deal with another child with problems. The baby does not deserve to have a mother like her.She uses things as an excuse to get out of things and they are not realiizing she is lying to them to get out of things.
1 person likes this
@KrauseHome (33831)
• United States
18 Aug 11
Personally it is about time that CPS take this seriously before she does something serious to harm her child. If she is telling him that she does not Love him, etc. someone really needs to be listening. Maybe she is suffering from the Depression and other issues due to being pregnant, but either way this is not Good. If your State and CPS do not want to take time to listen and care and keep on sending the kid back it is a wonder why there are not more kids out there being murdered for sure. You did the right thing by turning her in, and breaking off all ties. Now we can only Pray that somehow something good comes out of this for the children involved before something serious happens to them.
1 person likes this
@Tina30219 (27256)
• Onaway, Michigan
19 Aug 11
I agree they should do something before she does do something but they are not taking this seriously . They are listening to her lies.I hope what she has been telling me is true and when she has this baby both children get taken from her she does not deserve neithr child.
1 person likes this
@icats64 (43)
• United States
18 Aug 11
I always wonder why people like this are allowed to have children. For the sake of the boy, you did the right thing. He shouldn't have to go through the things his mother is putting him through. Too bad there isn't a caring family member willing to take him in. As for the ex-friend, cutting ties is the best thing. She is being self-centered and looking for attention. I do agree, she needs to seek mental help. She is most likely mad at herself for the situation she put herself in, so instead of thinking how to make it better and be responsible, she lashes out and blames people(even her son), to make herself feel better. Obviously, common sense is not a key player with this person. In time, she will cause her own downfall. You did the best you could as a friend. If you had continue being friends with her, she will suck the life out of you and take you down with her in her madness.
1 person likes this
@dfollin (12111)
• United States
18 Aug 11
Yes,I agree the best thing is to cut ties with her.I wonder to why this system sucks.I know people that lose their kids and shouldn't,when the kids right next door are still living with a bad parent!Go figure!
@Tina30219 (27256)
• Onaway, Michigan
19 Aug 11
It makes me sick also that states let people like this continue to have kids and let them keep them.I agree if I we're to continue to be friends she would definitely suck the life out of me. But that will not happen ever again.
1 person likes this
@skysuccess (8882)
• Singapore
18 Aug 11
Tina, I wonder if cutting off all communications with your friend is a good idea but I suppose it is your call. Let me assure you that I am not siding her and say that you are wrong. I am coming from another angle where for one, it is understandable for her reactions at this time. Being fair, I hope that you will remember that we sometimes do things without self control and even conscience when we are overwhelmed with anger or confusion. I have to say that your friend is really in a big mess and just do not fancy her position or yours. You did the right thing calling the CPS on her to avoid a possible fatal catastrophe on her children and even herself. I hope that she's being sent to some facility to be treated and rehabilitate which she awfully need. Hopefully, she will be sober by then to realize her wrongdoings and make peace with you. But the later, will be impossible if you cut her off completely. I am looking at the 2nd chance issue here. Hope you see my point.
@dfollin (12111)
• United States
18 Aug 11
But,from what I can tell that Tina said was that nothing is being done to get her or those kids help.
1 person likes this
@Tina30219 (27256)
• Onaway, Michigan
19 Aug 11
dfollin you are correct nothing is being done to get her help she lies her way out of things. She told me on more than one occasin she has. I hope when she has this baby they take both kids like she has been telling me they will do. These kids do not desserve this. I think this is why her family does not talk or have nothing to do with her. I have told myself before I was cutting all ties with her but went right back to being friends with her. I hope she does the right thing eventually time will tell.
2 people like this
• United States
18 Aug 11
Sounds to me like she is just wanting attention. You have done the right thing by making the calls. It's better to be safe then sorry when it comes to children. I can understand how the child does not want to go back into foster care but if that is the safest place for the child then that is where the child should be, or if there is someone in the family that can care for the child that would be the better option until this person gets their act together. The child may not want to go but you have to think of the child's safety and what is best for him.
@Tina30219 (27256)
• Onaway, Michigan
19 Aug 11
Yes I agree she is doing this for attention. I think ventually they will take both kids and they will both go in the system which will be better for all concerned these babies do not need a mother like her.
1 person likes this
@dfollin (12111)
• United States
18 Aug 11
You have done the right thing.The worker that told them not to talk to you anymore? Have you called her and explained? Did you record the call her son made to you? Because you should call CPS,because if she would kill herself then she might be like one of those weird people that I had started a discussion about and take their lives too.At the same time too,she might get mad at that boy and punish him if you call them and they don't remove the kids right away. Because of your weird friend and the way the system works,they have put you in between a rock and a hard spot!For your own piece of mind you need to just back off,but then if something happens to those kids or her you are going to feel bad. Where are the kids father or fathers? Try to talk to him or them,in confidence and/or the worker. This is tough! My prayers are with you and them.If I can think of anything else I will contact you.
@Tina30219 (27256)
• Onaway, Michigan
19 Aug 11
No I didn't record the conversation between me and him I wish I did. I do feel bad for those kids wish I could do more for them. I have not called and talked to the lady that told her not to talk to me because all I know is a first name and both people I have talked to did not know the workers. I have another friend that knows her as well so she is keeping me posted on what is going on and what she says. The 9 year old his father is in jail never meet him and the dad of the baby will not talk to me because of her.
1 person likes this
@dfollin (12111)
• United States
19 Aug 11
Maybe your other mutual friend can talk to the unborn babies father.Then maybe he will get it that you are not lying.I see that this is hard on you and your health,.Please don't let this get you down.
• Australia
28 Aug 11
I still think you did the right thing...i just don't know how people can be like that towards their own children - especially when they have carried them for 9 months! Things like that reall do get my blood boiling I am glad you did what you did...maybe she will wake up to herself one day.
@Tina30219 (27256)
• Onaway, Michigan
30 Aug 11
Thanks she really upsets me that she can sit and tell me she lies to these peopple including the cops because I have called them before on her. She says I know how to do it so I will not get in trouble. I am glad to be done with her crap. I just feel sorry for her son and unborn baby.
@sid556 (31018)
• United States
19 Aug 11
Wow, Tina, that is a horribly sad situation. It's hard because the kids hurt no matter what the outcome. Foster homes and living with strangers is not what they want either. They just want a safe and stable home...love. I take it that the father is not in the picture and the one she is carrying is from a different father? I think what you did was right and I really don't understand the workers telling her son not to talk to you. Obviously the boy is comfortable enough to reach out to you when things are really bad. The mother does sound as if she needs some mental help and it's too bad that the authorities are not helping her to get the help she needs. Maybe with the right help, she could actually be a good mother to her son and new baby.
@Krumpli (40)
• Romania
19 Aug 11
This is a very shocking story. You should not be ashamed of braking up with that woman. She does need medical help, and since she does not realise that, she could even become dangerous to you or your family. I am really really sorry for her boy and for her future child. They should probably be both taken by social care, because although it is against their hearts' desire, it is for their own good interest. The best interest actually. I hope the problem with the children will be solved. There is nothing worst in this world than a suffering child.
@thetis74 (1525)
19 Aug 11
Oh, that is just crazy. I pity the children what kind of mother they got. I think she really needs help or just to keep her son away from her. But the baby in her womb must be suffering too. But yeah, you couldn't really do anything with a person who doesn't even want to help herself. Such a terrible human being. She is really insane, that I don't even know what else to say. I'm just really sorry to hear that.
@bluespygirl (2112)
• Philippines
19 Aug 11
Hello there! Did you really cut your connections to her? Are there other ways for you to help her? I hope and pray that she gets help with proper authorities or people along with her son. How about her parents, siblings or other friends?
@Airen214 (50)
• Philippines
19 Aug 11
That's really sad. I may not totally understand what she feels because I'm not a parent yet but I know how hard this thing could be to a person who gets into this kind of trouble. She's trying to push away those people who care for her not admitting that she truly needs them, their sympathy, love, care and understanding. But how could this thing will work out if she herself is not even trying to be encouraged and get off from this unbearable life where she could feel alone and always be alone blaming herself or the baby she has in her womb. That's really pitiful!
• Guyana
19 Aug 11
You did the right thing. I had to do the same to my cousin who was neglecting her kids.
@Amanda81587 (3046)
• United States
18 Aug 11
She Is definitely immature and is not ready for children. She needs her children taken away from her but they need a families house to stay at because it is obvious her children do not want to go to a home. I think maybe you could have talked to her and talked her into getting help mentally before you just turned her in. People go though crazy things and sometimes it is their cry for attention. I can see her point in not seeing you as a friend because you were suppose to be on her side not against her but on your side you are looking out for the children. She definitely needs help though before she harms herself or her children.