Girls Taking the First Move

@pbbbsra (1214)
Philippines
August 25, 2011 7:36pm CST
I don't know if I am just old fashioned or what... but I am surprised by seeing girls doing the first move. SOme girls tell the man they are into them or they like them or they love the man even if the man still did not say or show a sign of liking them too. I know someone from my friends who did like that and I somehow got disappointed. Is this the modern woman? Or there are just women who don't want to lose the man their love and do the first move hoping that the man feels the same.... How do you feel about girls taking the first move? Do you think men like it or do they get disappointed too?
2 people like this
16 responses
@brew2x (3096)
• Philippines
26 Aug 11
A lot of girls are like that nowadays. Maybe they just want to express themselves, perhaps they are hoping that the guys feel the same way but if not then they will still feel good since there won't be any regrets in the future that they didn't do anything about their feelings. I am not one of those girls though since I will feel embarrass if the guy doesn't feel the same. Also, I don't want a guy courting me or dating me just because I like him. I want the feelings to be mutual and I want them to make the first move. I don't have anything against those girls that tell or show the guys they like how they feel, I actually think they are tough and brave. I am just not like that.
@pbbbsra (1214)
• Philippines
27 Aug 11
This modern day thing makes me scared. I am thinking what if it will be my daughter doing that? I think I will feel sad. I am old fashioned. Well, as much as can I will try to teach my children, especially my future daughter about these things. I still think that men should do the first move...When I met my husband and he told me he loves me, I did not say yes right away, because I don't want him to think that i am easy to get... There is a right time I guess for everything.
@brew2x (3096)
• Philippines
31 Aug 11
In this modern day, there are still conservative people. Most of the time upbringing plays a big part on our behavior. I know you can teach your daughter how to act more ladylike :)
@huilichan8 (1379)
• Singapore
26 Aug 11
With due respect to your view, I don't see anything wrong with that. I have ever made the first move...now I remember...not just once, but twice. The first time, I got rejected because the guy already had a girlfriend. (I didn't know about that until he brought his girlfriend to meet up with me.) But the second time, I succeeded.:P There is a Chinese that goes sth like this,"When a guy pursues a gal, he is faced with a mountain; when a gal pursues a guy, it is easy." So, I don't think there are many guys who would be disappointed if they are being pursued by gals.
• Singapore
26 Aug 11
So sorry, I missed one word after the word, Chinese, in 4th row. It is the word 'saying'. Btw, I am just wondering if there is anyone here who knows how to edit posts after they are being submitted? Thanks!
@pbbbsra (1214)
• Philippines
27 Aug 11
Wow, good for you. I'm happy you fight for the man you loved.
@petersum (4526)
• United States
26 Aug 11
Girls have been doing that for decades. But perhaps not so much in your country. Why not? Why should guys chase the girls only? It's called equality!
@Triple0 (1907)
• Australia
26 Aug 11
Awww... really? Some girls do toy around with some guys but there are those who are just waiting for the guy to say something but they don't so it's up to the girls to make the first move. It doesn't really matter, depends on how much confidence you have. If the girl has the more confidence then let the girl make the first move.
@pbbbsra (1214)
• Philippines
27 Aug 11
MAybe some girls do... but there are girls who don't play around. I respect girls doing the first move. I guess I want to call that courage, to do what it takes to keep the man they love.
• United States
26 Aug 11
In today's world women make the first move all the time. There was a guy I was in love with years ago when I was a teen. I was to shy to make the first move. I know today it was probably for the better. Because had I not been shy and had I made a move on him, I know it would have altered the future for me. These 38 years later I still think back remembering him and still at times dream and fantasize about him. When you say girl how young are you talking? Because young girls really need to be careful about guys.
@pbbbsra (1214)
• Philippines
27 Aug 11
I mean girls so young like 15 or 16. i have a niece and he is really handsome. Everytime we go for vacation together during summer, girls would pass in front of our summer house checking out if he is there. They would stay there until he looked. They would come at night and ask him to go to the park. Maybe I am just a jealous aunt, but that wasn't just the time I saw a girl make the first move. Some of my friends did too, and most of them are turned down because the guy is old fashioned.
@inertia4 (26786)
• United States
27 Aug 11
Things have changed. Women are much more independent then they ever were. There is nothing wrong with the girl making the first move, it is the way it is today. It seems to me the old fashioned ways are out the window now. When I was growing up it was always the guy who asked the girl out, never the girl asking the guy, but like I said, times, they are a changing.
• Australia
27 Aug 11
I think it's great that girls feel they can share their feelings openly and feel free to choose who they want to spend their lives with. I think it's harder to sustain the relationship. There's something special about a man who goes out of his way to chase you and express their interest for you, i think girls are suckers for players.
@thetis74 (1525)
27 Aug 11
I think it depends. But for me, I'd rather wait for the guy to make the first move because I'd be really embarrassed if the guy doesn't even like me a bit. I would just rather loose him if he doesn't have anything for me. Besides, it is really awkward. That's just how I feel about it.
@mods196621 (3631)
• Philippines
26 Aug 11
That is depend the woman situation or how she communicate to a man she likes. I am not a modern or old fashion girl but i am not agree with the girls who did the first move in a way that the guy does not telling her she loves her. First let the guy so the first motive then the follow up goes to her.. Well maybe she doesnt want him to lose. But the point is she is not sure if he will stay or not. Some boys dont want to a girl to do the first move they turned them off. So girls be careful.
• United States
26 Aug 11
Guys should definitely say the "L" word first because it is better for them to say it when they feel comfortable. Some girls are confident enough to ask guys out. Kudos to them! I honestly think that guys should do the asking out. However, Men love it because they won't have the risk of being turned down.
@dpk262006 (55817)
• Delhi, India
26 Aug 11
It is their personal choice, if they want to take the initiative, there is nothing wrong in it, to my mind.
@ebuscat (5949)
• Philippines
26 Aug 11
For me they are disappointed too but there are some men like it.
@ennaira (16)
• Philippines
26 Aug 11
girls of this generation are more open and more aggressive. they don't care if they're the one's making the first move. it just depends on you whether you will stay being old-fashioned or you'll try being aggressive. you have the freedom to decide which one do you like.
@obe212003 (2302)
• Philippines
26 Aug 11
i was quite shocked to see a love letter by my son's classmate, she was courting him! times have really changed as women have really cope up with the equality issue, lol! honestly, i am for women who really knows what they want and able to express them, and obviously i would be really flattered!
@veedee13 (242)
• United States
26 Aug 11
We now live in a modern world and i think a girl making the first move is ok now in this generation.I once made the first move and i was glad i took the risk even if it didn't turn out very well in the end.
• Philippines
26 Aug 11
I guess there's nothing wrong if the girl will do the first move . .we are now in a modern generation . .Its a call of equality with everyone . .Its just how the boys interpret it . . good luck
• United States
26 Aug 11
I believe I thought as you when I was younger and perhaps if single I probably would not be shy to "make the first move". I say this only because in reality there are just as many shy men as there are women. If we want something/anything in life we tend to strive and work hard at it. So I believe this same rule would apply to me if I felt I really liked someone.