How should I respond, or should I respond?

@bagarad (11840)
Paso Robles, California
September 15, 2011 4:11am CST
Today I got an email from someone contacting me through my Squidoo bio page. Now this is pretty normal in itself, but normally its another lensmaster I know or the person at least tells me what they want to talk about or they ask a question. But in this email, the person, whose name I did not recognize, said simply that he likes to find good quality content on line and after reading some of my lenses he'd like to have my email address so we can keep in touch. I have never gotten this kind of request before . He does give me his name and email address, but I am reluctant to answer until I know more about him. Many of my lenses are very personal, so it could be he has a question or comment. But why,then, would not give some hint of it in this email? What do you think I should do? The first thing I will do is probably google the name after I have some time in a couple of days to see what I can find out. If what I find out is not negative, then I still need to decide whether to answer, which will give this person my email address. What would you do?
3 people like this
12 responses
@inertia4 (27605)
• United States
21 Sep 11
For starters, make sure it's not a spam mail. Secondly, if you feel uncomfortable with it, then don't answer it. Or , since you got the message through Squidoo, then contact Squidoo and give them a copy of the email. Ask them to investigate it for you. I am not so fast to respond to something like that. I know that curiosity gets the better of us.
@bagarad (11840)
• Paso Robles, California
21 Sep 11
Now that I've finished my homework on this, I answered him on his own Squidoo bio page and haven't heard anything since.
@inertia4 (27605)
• United States
22 Sep 11
Okay, that was a good idea. But remember, we all get some spam from people. I know that I have gotten some spam messages on some of the sites that I use. I immediately send them to the Admins of the site. The last thing you want is someone annoying you.
• United States
15 Sep 11
My mom said when I was a baby when a stranger tried to say hello , like many do to babies, I had this " I didn't give you permission to speak to me" expression on my face! I think I still have that in me at times. So to receive a " Friend" request Anywhere save through My Lot , I would just ignore it! But that's me. You have to follow your gut. If it feels ok, then write him back. He may have gone through something similar and can relate to your work on a deeper level. Or if you feel leery of this , Then Don't contact him! It has has to be up to you .And you will have to be able to live with your decision so follow your feelings.
1 person likes this
@bagarad (11840)
• Paso Robles, California
15 Sep 11
I have responded in a way that's appropriate I think. See my comment above for what I did. I have a better idea now of what he probably wants and I'm not interested. The truth is, my email address is plastered all over the internet for anyone who has any smarts at all. I'll bet anyone on myLot is smart enough to find it. But if you find it, please don't post it here. Just email me from your correct email address and tell me how smart you were to find it. And don't forget to add you MyLot moniker.
1 person likes this
• United States
16 Sep 11
Some may say I'm smart enough to figure this out but I won't Email addresses are personal things. If you want me to have it , then send me a private message! If not I won't have it. Just promise me this, if you were to leave My Lot send me a private message and I'll give you my email address! That way if you want to write me , outside of My Lot, you can.
@drannhh (15211)
• United States
18 Sep 11
I love Squidoo. Well, I surely would not share my email with a total stranger. He can keep in touch by commenting on your lenses. I should think that would be quite enough. If he doesn't understand that keeping your identity close to the vest is in your best interest, then he isn't worth knowing.
1 person likes this
@bagarad (11840)
• Paso Robles, California
18 Sep 11
Most of the time responding to those who contact me through Squidoo is no big deal because I either am familiar with the lensmaster or the person states what he or she is wanting directly. This person was not direct. When I saw he had no bio -- only a contact me button on his bio page, I just told him "no go" right on hsi bio page. He probably has got the message by now.
@zandi458 (27952)
• Malaysia
15 Sep 11
I think not everyone who asked have bad motives. The person asking you from a site that you frequent might have been mesmerized by your writings which prompted him to request for your email addy. So why not, no harm in knowing the unknown as it can establish a new friendship which will benefit your page in the long run.
1 person likes this
@bagarad (11840)
• Paso Robles, California
15 Sep 11
That was why I even considered this enough to ask here. But now I have responded in what I think is the appropriate way. I will reveal all below.
@NoWayRo (1062)
• Romania
15 Sep 11
Hi Bagarad, I haven't been to Squidoo in a while, so I don't remember their policy in such cases, maybe you can contact them and ask if they heard of this person? It could be he's sending out messages to everybody and collecting e-mail addresses. Or you could answer him (without giving away your e-mail address), and ask him a few questions. Does he have his own lenses? What did he like about yours? What kind of content does he like to read? If the answer is polite and specific to your questions, maybe he's genuine (thought I can't imagine why he needs your e-mail).
1 person likes this
@bagarad (11840)
• Paso Robles, California
15 Sep 11
I was thinking of asking the Rocket Moms if they have heard from him, since that's a private group.
• United States
15 Sep 11
I would not do anything at all until I had researched the legitimacy of this person and their request. There are too many crooks and scammers on the Internet to take a chance on opening an avenue of contact with an unknown person.
1 person likes this
@owlwings (39106)
• Cambridge, England
15 Sep 11
I would reply (politely and through the Squidoo channel, rather than by email) that you are sorry but you do not give out your email address. There is no need to give any reason. It is a matter of personal choice and you have an absolute right to privacy.
1 person likes this
@bagarad (11840)
• Paso Robles, California
15 Sep 11
I don't think there's away to do that unless he's on Squidoo, and it doesn't appear that he is.
@rosie230 (1674)
15 Sep 11
I wouldn't give out my personal email address, in this situation. Maybe what you should do, is suggest that you remain in contact through the bio page only. Thats the problem with the internet you never know who you are dealing with, there are a lot of strange people around. He may be a very nice man, and this could all be very innocent, but still I advise not to give out your email address :)
1 person likes this
@bagarad (11840)
• Paso Robles, California
15 Sep 11
He can reach me through my bio page, but I can't reach him that way if he's not on Squidoo.
@eileenleyva (10963)
• Philippines
15 Sep 11
Beware! Giving email addresses to strangers is never an option.
1 person likes this
@bagarad (11840)
• Paso Robles, California
15 Sep 11
That's my first instinct.
@SIMPLYD (78776)
• Philippines
15 Sep 11
Be careful my friend in giving away your email address. Maybe you could at least get to know the person first by trying to discern through his/her responses to discussions and through the topics he/she started . More or less you can gauge what type of a person he/she is through them. Good luck my friend.
@bingskee (5237)
• Philippines
15 Sep 11
please do not give your email address. you can at least first try to know who this person really is.
@waflay (2717)
• Nairobi, Kenya
15 Sep 11
I think it's not good to trust this person for you don't know his intentions.