there is no perfect guy!

Philippines
September 21, 2011 5:47pm CST
My Boyfriend and I are now in 3 years of our relationship. We have come through the ups and downs of a normal relationship. Our first year was a disaster because, we do not know each other that much. I was not honest with him like I am pretending that I am fine while the truth was I am not and he was also doing the same. I caught him cheating on me in the net with so many female flirty friends and we fought and I almost gave up. But the thing is I forgave him, I did not look only with his negative points but I consider all his effort in our relationship. I know that he loves me when I am thinking all the best things that he did for me. Like being with me in times of natural disaster, When I need financial support and calling me every night just to check if I am alright. There is no perfect guy and we should also learn to forgive. Be positive and be honest enough with your feelings it will help a lot in a relationship.
16 responses
@ily12011 (108)
• United States
21 Sep 11
There is No Perfect Guy or Even a Girl. People make mistakes , the live and they learn. if he loves you like u think he does he wont net date or how ever you want to put it. and that is a good thing to forgive him but if it happens again i would just stop trying..he sounds like a good guy just has some flaws. but everyone does.. Hope it gets better :)
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
Thanks for your comment. Many have told me that in a relationship there would be a time that a man will flirt or find another woman, but, if he will realize that who he really loves is her girlfriend he will come back to you and will never do it again. I consider that saying and I think my man already realized it because he already proposed to me. Maybe that time he was not sure if I am the one for him. Now I am happy at the same time worried because we are far from each other he is in a military training right now.
@ily12011 (108)
• United States
22 Sep 11
yes, but i dont think that it always right.. cause some people leave the one they love for someone they like and then the one they liked left the for the one they loved and then they come back to the person they loved just cause they don't want to be alone.. so you have to be careful when it comes to that. and that's good. :) and do u trust him ? if so then u should have nothing to worry about :) everyone stresses over that kind of stuff when it comes to training,deployment and all that.. im sure the people in there stress over it to.
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
Thanks ily, Actually what he did was just flirting for so many girls in a particular website.He did not meet those girls in person only in internet. He said that it was just for fun. The good thing was he did not fell in love for a particular girl. So there was no particular girl to be jealous with.
@Netsbridge (3253)
• United States
21 Sep 11
True that there is no perfect guy or perfect relationship. Just curious: You say you have been seeing this person for about 3 years. Why has he not married you yet?
@Hazelme (647)
• United States
21 Sep 11
I agree with you no relationship is ever perfect. But maybe he hasn't marry her because their not ready, the circumstances etc. The years doesn't have anything to do with marriage but waiting too too long can mean he is not taking you seriously.
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
Thanks for being curious Netsbridge, actually he is in military training right now and we have no communication. For you curiosity sake we are engaged and I am hoping that we will be married next year after his training. Hazelme, you are right that number of years are not measured in a relationship it is the quality of the relationship not the quantity or length of relationship. What would be the purpose of a long engagement if you do not love each other right? I always pray Hazelme, that God will always be the center of our relationship.
@Hazelme (647)
• United States
22 Sep 11
That is really good jaderamirez that you take god as a huge part of your relationship, that way he can bless your relationship and help you guys work on it and love to never end.
@SydneyJ (902)
• United States
21 Sep 11
I agree with this. I've been with the guy I'm with now off and on for a few years now and I will be the first one to say that he's changed and messed up but I also know he tries and still treats me like a princess but my mom doesn't think I should even bother to talk to him because he's had some issues in the past. She's not very open minded but I know that no one is perfect and no one ever will be so I continue to keep him around..
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
Hello Sydney, I think our situation is a bit the same. I think you should talk to your mom and tell her all the good qualities of your boyfriend. Mothers know best right? Maybe she think that you deserve someone better. You know your bf well if you think he really loves you then fight for it.
@SydneyJ (902)
• United States
22 Sep 11
well last night she finally said she'd give him another chance.. I hope she's able to see that he's getting away from him problems and isn't a bad person for me
@shanemae (1025)
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
how i wish there was but really there is no such thing as the perfect guy. when we love then we should accept the person as who they are the positives and their flaws that would make it perfect. also in a relationship we should expect trials and we should face them at once by keeping the trust and communication great for both couple then whatever problem that may arise both will really make it work even at it's worst. well, 3 years is much and congratulations to you i think you found your match. GOdbless both of you! :)
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
Thank you! for 3 years we have been through a lot of trials. We laugh and we cry. This time is the hardest part for me because, he is away for a six-month training. It is hard I just pray that God will give me everything to surpass the impact of loneliness.
@shanemae (1025)
• Philippines
23 Sep 11
6 months of training is nothing with 3 good years dear friend. just keep the communication.communicate everyday or at least if not everyday then once a week will do. i suggest that both of you keep a list of the activities you had so that you won't miss out anything when you talk over the phone or e-mail. also! keep your communication too with our God almighty. He is of great help to bless your relationship! :)
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
It is true that there is no perfect guy and even girls.We every one do mistakes,sometimes temptations can do harm you,but it depends how faithful you are to the relationships.. i do not like a cheater guy too..because i feel they hurts me a lot and not like those people because i am honest....
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
I am honest too like you. Even if my bf hurt me for that reason I did not think to get even. We are woman we should take care of our reputation and image. If we keep on doing good things we will be rewarded in some ways.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
Yes i am sure what good things we do ,will also back to us..Will reward us more on that..It is life part to be hurt and there is no perfect partner but we have to grow up.. And also take all,accept and stand what is right.
22 Sep 11
True, there are no perfect person. But for me, when i started loving her, everything in her is perfect for me. Even the very small thing she does. She sometimes do clumsy things but still, she's perfect. Well, that's me. :)
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
That is good to hear. My bf also told that to my best friend, that what he love about me are my negatives. Not all men are like you and my bf, both of you know how to really love.
22 Sep 11
That's also good for you. Hope he continue to be that way. I will also do the same to my girl.
@jpso138 (7851)
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
You are right. There is no perfect guy. A person always has a good side and a bad side. But the thing is, for a relationship to succeed, each one must make adjustment and each one must accept the person as what he is or what she is. That is what love is all about. Its not actually blind but rather it has a third eye that sees the special qualities of a person even if other does not see.
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
Thank you jpsol, Now what I see in him are all his positive qualities. We enjoy each other and we are happy together. I trust him so much now and petty things are not important and disregarded.
@didi13 (2926)
• Romania
22 Sep 11
You wish you a perfect man? Perfect for me is a normal man, simple, intelligent, interesting to have different concerns, than common sense, to be grounded, stable, responsible, respectful, loving, loyal. There are many qualities that men possess. The rest, everything is "perfect" in a man, makes it unique and interesting. Living with the illusion that there is perfect man, do not straighten your vision to something that deviates quite far from normal? Honestly, even I can not imagine how it might look / act a man perfect. Or a perfect woman. Everything is subjective. As long as you are fulfilled and happy with him, everything is perfect.
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
Yes didi, I am very much happy with him. We love and know each other so much now. The moment I shared all my thoughts and negative feelings with him was the time he told me also his negative feelings with me. That day I understand that we should not only be looking to other people's mistakes but, we look first on ours.
@famee87 (29)
22 Sep 11
hello jade! there is no perfect guy and there is no perfect person either. all of us have our own sets of flaws, strengths and those things make us unique from others. when it comes to a relationship, one must always have his/her fair share. sometimes relationship ends because one loves too much and the other loves too little. for me, it is a give and take process and we need to accept our partners as they are.
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
That is so nice of you Famee, give and take is important in relationship you are very right. That is why I always forgive him and I could not accept the fact that we have long quarrel because no one would like to forgive or put down our pride. Relationship takes courage, sacrifices to work. I want to teach my man to realize that people are so forgiving and he is being love so much by me. I want to pamper him and make him realize that his girl is not an ordinary one, that he is lucky to have a girl like me.
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
I agree that there is no perfect guy or relationship what matters most is the love you have with each other and have God as the center of your relationship. .If you love the person you learn to forgive all the things he/she has done but not too much because he/she might be used into it like doing things again and again because you are ready to forgive him/her. . good luck to your relationship and wish you a happy ending. .God bless. .:)
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
Thank you so much, Now I am very sure of what i feel for him. I really love him and I will do my best to make our relationship stay strong and happy no matter what. I wish the same with you! God Bless.
@kearkear (963)
• Davao, Philippines
22 Sep 11
Either man nor a woman. There is no such perfect in this world, though we are trying to be perfect. We have our shortcomings, differences, and our own individuality. In a relationship, acceptance and understanding are one of the key strengths for a long relationship. Though we have these shortcomings and difference as long as there is acceptance and understanding, a long relationship will be present.
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
Yes, thank you! Love is a wonderful thing, because of love I forgive, forget and accept. Since I realized how much I love him, I started to count all his positive side and never his shortcomings.
@eseulhan (199)
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
The PERFECT BOYFRIEND doesnt drink, smoke, cheat or EXIST. What i mean is that there is really no such thing as perfect in this world. You just have to accept one's imperfections. You two dont need to be perfect, just love each other imperfectly.
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
Thanks, yes we should accept each other for no man in this world is perfect and there is always a room for change if ever one of us commit mistakes.
@ferbjohn69 (1127)
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
No one is perfect.Even the wisest people of the world err.If you want your relationship to be stronger you should consider that.I am also imperfect.
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
Thanks ferbjohn, I also commit mistakes and he forgave me. To love is to understand and forgive and that is all I am doing.
• United States
22 Sep 11
I can attest to that. The person I'm with we have been together going on five years and I have caught him on flirty sites and stupid stuff like that even pictures on our family computer but I messed with one guy twice on him. I think I kind of done it out of revenge. Well guess what It did not change anything and yes I told him about it. He didn't have to wait to catch me in something. If your gonna do wrong a person should never have to catch you. If your a man or woman enough to do it behind they're back be man or woman enough to come forward with the truth. It doesn't excuse what you did but it lets the person know that they can trust you some what even know it will take time for you to gain they're trust for what you had done behind they're back in the first place. So it goes back to what jaderamirez none of us is perfect. I love the person I'm with and I know he loves me but neither me nor him are perfect. There is no perfect woman or man.
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
Thank you for being honest. Me too there was a time that I planned to get revenge because I was really hurt but, for no reason I backed out. Love is patient and not jealous as the Bible says. We are just human and we easily commit mistakes, I really understand you for doing it. At least now you change for the better. Keep it up.
@ferbjohn69 (1127)
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
No one is perfect.Even the wisest people of the world err.If you want your relationship to be stronger you should consider that.I am also imperfect.
@Hazelme (647)
• United States
21 Sep 11
Their is no perfect man in order to love someone is to accept their imperfect. Many of us including me when we were younger believe the perfect man was going to come. But that's a big fat illusion of us. Once we grow up we see how people really are. If you and your boyfriend are in love then stick to him, but if you are not so sure thinking about it throughly can help. I wish you the best with your boyfriend and remember no man is perfect but some man just evil. and Welcome to mylot!
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
I will tell you my story regarding your comment, You mentioned that we should accept the imperfections right? Actually, my fiancée had said it to my best friend. My best friend asked her what are my qualities that he love, and he answered my imperfections and my negative side are the reasons why he loves me so much.