My daughter is sleeping in my bed..

United States
September 23, 2011 10:45am CST
I came home to find her sleeping in the house and I was shocked. Every night she has been sleeping at her boyfriends house. I was like what happened to bring this on. I just went in my room to see her sleeping all wild and crazy and saw my little girl. You know our kids grow up so fast in life. but,this is my little girl and I wish every night she would sleep right in my bed. I sleep on the couch anyway. lol. When I just look at her pretty face and see all the hardship she has faced it hurts my heart. I will be 42 next week and wish I could turn back the hands of time so we never moved here and she got hooked up with him. I feel like crying when I think of moving here to better her life. it is not my fault I wanted a better life for her..
3 people like this
14 responses
@GardenGerty (90967)
• Marion, Kansas
23 Sep 11
I know they look so vulnerable when they sleep. I do not think that your move caused the problem. I think she would have found a loser where ever she was, and she was getting bullied where you were before. I think she just needed to be defiant and so she hooked up with this guy who was available. I only say this because I do not think you need to blame yourself, you cannot un do what has happened, you can only make sure she has a safe place to land. She has wanted to make "adult" decisions, and she has made some very bad ones.
2 people like this
@stephcjh (32385)
• United States
23 Sep 11
Very true. My daughter is the same way. It did not matter how hard I tried to lead her down the right path, she chose the wrong one anyway and still does.
2 people like this
@stephcjh (32385)
• United States
23 Sep 11
She just doesn't care to be around me either. She is to have our first grandchild in about 7 days and we will never get to see it and love it like we love her. She is just so hateful!
2 people like this
• United States
23 Sep 11
I think garden is riht. I should not feel like it is my fault but I do. I wish I could do something about her want in this scum bag in her bed.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Sep 11
Firstly Gifts had you not moved who knows what else could have happened. As parents we make the toughest decisions at times and some of them are not easy ones to make, but so as long as our intent was good we can't be blamed for certain happenings in life. I am glad that she was peacefully sound asleep and that you and her were in the same house together. These are the type of moments we relish for years to come.
• United States
23 Sep 11
I try to see it this way because it is the truth. I was thinking about movin again so she would not be around him even more. but in the lon run I would lose adrian because who knows how far he is willing to go. He wants to leave the state but i don't want to go that far.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Sep 11
She is growing up and you do also have consider you. Let's face it you could move way across town and or out of state, teens have their ways and she would find her way there. I have been looking at the calender consistently, as I am so hoping the Job Corp move hurry's.
1 person likes this
@stephcjh (32385)
• United States
23 Sep 11
I know exactly what you mean. I wanted better for my daughter too. She has chosen so many wrong paths now and she hates me for no reason at all. I wanted her to go to college but she just wants to live a life of corruption.
2 people like this
• United States
23 Sep 11
YOu know it would break my heart to get this far with my daughter. I don't know what I would do. I would be broken hearted if I could not see my grandchild. It would break me for sure. If she were to have this losers child he may keep it from me being he would not mind me never seeing my child again. it is sad how he does not even speak to his own mother.
1 person likes this
@jazzyrae (1747)
• United States
23 Sep 11
it sounds like despite the hardships you really do love her that makes her lucky
1 person likes this
@stephcjh (32385)
• United States
23 Sep 11
Yes. My daughter has put me through a WHOLE LOT and still is. I still ove her but she hates me and chooses everyone else over me.
1 person likes this
@stephcjh (32385)
• United States
23 Sep 11
oops... "love" her
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Sep 11
Yes I love that girl with all my heart. I could not love her more..
@nezavisima (7419)
• Bulgaria
23 Sep 11
You used your daughter to sleep in strange kasht with one of his girlfriends are shocked isega normal. but obviously something has really happened and she had returned home. because it feels just at home relaxing and safe. you should try to understand what happened seems to have split with her boyfriend or something else maybe have not realized that so. The only thing I can wish you a successful future. nice day!
1 person likes this
@stephcjh (32385)
• United States
23 Sep 11
I wish gifts daughter would listen to her mom before it is too late. My daughter would not listen and she still doesn't realise how bad she has messed her life up.
3 people like this
• United States
23 Sep 11
I wish she would listen to me as well. But,in due time she will listen to someone even if it is when it is too late..
2 people like this
• United States
24 Sep 11
Let's hope it is sooner and not later where things can't ruin her life forever.
1 person likes this
@carolscash (9503)
• United States
23 Sep 11
Don't feel guilty for wanting to give her a better life. She could leave this loser if she needs too or wanted to. I am glad that she was home and I hope that she has came home because she has left the loser and is going to stay with you awhile.
1 person likes this
@stephcjh (32385)
• United States
23 Sep 11
Exactly. My daughter only wants a life of corruption. I wanted better for her but she doesn't.
1 person likes this
@bagarad (7917)
• Paso Robles, California
26 Sep 11
Having a child like this helped me to better understand how God continues to love me -- even when I'm willful and defiant. Why do our children do this to themselves and refuse to heed our instruction meant only for their good? Why do we do the same thing by ignoring God's wisdom and thinking we know better than he does what's good for us and will make us happy?
@mobi407 (15)
23 Sep 11
it is not your fault you wanted a better life for her so please dont crying you are cute and best father your daughter.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Sep 11
I am just broken inside when I think of me movin here for this child to et into a good school and she wound up with this loser.
@dorannmwin (36697)
• United States
25 Sep 11
Finding your daughter sleeping in your bed just really goes to show that underneath the tough exterior that she shows you most of the time she really is still your little girl. Life can be hard on all of us sometimes, but we really do boil down to being our parents babies at times, no matter what our age is. You know, I also think that we as parents sometimes make the wrong decisions, that we think are the right decisions when it comes to our children. However, in the long run, I would be willing to bet that everything will be just fine.
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (115084)
• Boise, Idaho
24 Sep 11
We all would all like to turns back the wheels of time at some point. You can't make her decisions for her anymore. Sadly she is on her own road now. Mothers love their children and want the very best for them and this is about all we can do but be there if they need us and love them.
@Amanda81587 (3046)
• United States
24 Sep 11
No it is not. There was no way you would know that her life would outcome like thus. You were doing what was best for her at the time, we are parents which means we are only human. We can not for see the future.
1 person likes this
• United States
24 Sep 11
You did what you thought you had to do Gifts. You had no idea how things would turn out. If you had known, you might have thought of something different. There is no point in beating yourself up about things. When your daughter wakes up, just give her a hug and let her know she is still very much in your heart.
1 person likes this
@vikku2001 (258)
• India
23 Sep 11
Hello gifts Whatever you think about your daughter is always for her better.Whatever you did,if she got hurt,its not your fault.Everyone has to move on.She will come over this soon.You are the one who raises her so no one can think more better for her than you.Yes sometimes it seems that boy friend's love is also necessary but she will get that somewhere else or she still can make that relationship over distance.
@stephcjh (32385)
• United States
23 Sep 11
My daughter is the same way and she married the boy after only knowing him one month. He is going to prison soon but she still does not care about me as her mother. She hates me and does not ever want to come around me after all that I have done for her. I wanted the best for her and she always chose the worst. I cannot try to help her no more.
1 person likes this
@bagarad (7917)
• Paso Robles, California
26 Sep 11
In 1988, we lived in Washington state for four months. We had hoped to buy a house there and give our kids a better life in a rural area. We even had a house picked out. Then the contract my husband had there ended and there was no new one, so we had to return home to our neighborhood in California. That's when Sarah really started to go down the wrong path. Right before she left us, she had asked my husband for all of us to take a vacation again and leave town. Maybe this was her way of trying to prevent what she knew was about to happen without telling us what she was being pressured to do. My husband beats himself up over this sometimes, thinking if he'd known what was on her mind, we might have prevented her running away through this carefully plotted scheme for her to be with her boyfriend who was twice her age. One of the neighbors and the boyfriend had helped her plan this, and the boyfriend probably pressured her to do it. But we didn't even know who he was or that this neighbor was helping them meet without our knowledge. We knew there was someone she was meeting when she was at the park with her girlfriend, and showing up at other times when we weren't there. I think deep in her heart, she knew she was making a big mistake and was having second thoughts about it -- thus the request for us all to leave town. There are a lot of "might-have-beens" in life. If we'd stayed in Washington state, would both my children still be alive? We have no way of knowing that. If we'd taken that trip, would it only have delayed Sarah's plans? Or would it have put an end to them? We will never know. We have to walk in the light we have at the moment, because it's all we have to see by.
@rqlutz (59)
• India
23 Sep 11
you are now with your and it is never to correct a mistake. You should do something so that you make your daughter happy and you should never be hard on yourself. If you talk with your daughter about what you did, i know she would understand and maybe you will work out together a plan and which would benefit both of you.