don`t remember your bad memories

@adhyz82 (36289)
Indonesia
September 26, 2011 3:10am CST
remember the past is something natural if you can do it well.. But for some of people, remember bad memories several years ago can be wrong and negative for your mind and your body and can weaker your body a research in Granada university said like that (the research report that attitude person who remember their past will effect for their perception in current life and life quality negative accepting can make a bigger problem for someone when they must build relation with another in their current life i can say that people who always think negative is tend to had depression , anxious and change their habit and behaviour.. what do you think about this research?? do you agree?? and what is your personal experience about this research??
7 people like this
17 responses
• Mexico
2 Oct 11
Hi adhyz: I agree with this research. I have met some people who actually can't be happy because they are always thinking about the past and all the things that never were, the things that went wrong, the mistakes they have made or the bad things that just happened in life and that's sad because you don't get anything about this attitude but stress. I try to remember my past by thinking about the good things and about the past things as lessons I've learnt. ALVARO
1 person likes this
@adhyz82 (36289)
• Indonesia
8 Aug 12
hai alvaro..how are you?? iam late respond your respond.. are you happy now when your country reach the final of man soccer in olympics 2012?? back to the topic so how you avoid the bad effect when you remember your bad memmories in the past??
@Sanitary (3969)
• Singapore
30 Sep 11
I don't agree. Bad memories are there for us to learn, and they act as painful experiences. Without bad memories, how are we going to move on? Good memories are good but they are not practical at all. IF one has never been cheated or lied to in their entire life, there comes a day they will lose everything and without any bad experience prior to that, they will fall even harder as they have been proven wrong.
1 person likes this
@adhyz82 (36289)
• Indonesia
8 Aug 12
sanitary, iam sorry late for responding here.. so do you ever remember your bad memories?? what part so do you say that bad memories is good for us so we can avoid the mistake??
• Philippines
27 Sep 11
I agree. There are also times when I just find myself dwelling on bad memories. I don't like the feeling it brings but I still keep on doing it. It also sucks me in so that it affects my whole day. It's really hard to get out of it but once I do, it's all good.
1 person likes this
@adhyz82 (36289)
• Indonesia
27 Sep 11
yes, i think sometimes we must remember the bad memmories, but remember whole day for our past, it can make us did not focus with our future and sometimes make nightmare for some of us.. what do you think??
@stephcjh (32385)
• United States
26 Sep 11
It is very hard to forget bad memories. That is not an easy thing to get totally out of your mind. I have tried for years and it is still there but alot easier to handle now.
1 person likes this
@adhyz82 (36289)
• Indonesia
27 Sep 11
so does it affect your life??
@atleya (947)
• Indonesia
27 Sep 11
I agree with the research. It is not good to put negative things in our mind. We can say negative things as poison which can destroy our life. So, let's to life in positive thinking, and you will be happy.
@adhyz82 (36289)
• Indonesia
28 Sep 11
what about when someone hurt your heart atleya??
1 person likes this
@atleya (947)
• Indonesia
28 Sep 11
I will try to forget it. Time will do it for us. Don't ever remember bad things in the past. Maybe you think I am just say a theory. Yes, I understand it.., it is not an easy to forget something which hurt our heart. But, you must also consider why we must suffer while someone after hurt us, can enjoy her/his life. This is not fair.
1 person likes this
@adhyz82 (36289)
• Indonesia
8 Aug 12
iam sorry if iam late respond here atleya. where are you now?? i never see you come here anymore.. go back to the topic.. yes sometimes time will do it for us.. time will make us forgot what happen to us in the past..
@r03249 (357)
• Philippines
27 Sep 11
Consciously forgetting something is suppression. And I think it ain't healthy at all. I think we should first try to accept what happen for us to move on. If we don't happen to accept it, this will hunt us for the rest of our lives. But I think suppression is goo at times to protect our ego and to defend ourselves from being hurt, but only for a while. If you constantly do it and never accept reality, I don't think that will make you any good.
@adhyz82 (36289)
• Indonesia
28 Sep 11
yes,sometimes we must begin from accepting the condition.. and you are right, i can`t accept the situation and it make me harder for forgiving something or someone
@r03249 (357)
• Philippines
28 Sep 11
accepting is a hell of a good start. :) takes time, though but it happens.
1 person likes this
@adhyz82 (36289)
• Indonesia
8 Aug 12
i think i can accept it slowly.. thanks for your suggestion my friend..
@Devilova (5396)
• Indonesia
26 Sep 11
Well, a bad memories from accidents or failure will make most peoples get nightmare and try as hard as they can not to feel it again.
@adhyz82 (36289)
• Indonesia
27 Sep 11
nightmare?? is it your personall experience??
@Devilova (5396)
• Indonesia
28 Sep 11
Thanks God I never had a bad memories that make me keep awake at the night.
1 person likes this
@adhyz82 (36289)
• Indonesia
8 Aug 12
@asliah (11149)
• Philippines
8 Aug 12
hi, remembering bad memories can only harm us because we will only stress thinking of it,its more good we remember all good things happened to us,but sometimes we cant avoid to think those bad times especially when its really remarkable to our heart and mind.
@adhyz82 (36289)
• Indonesia
8 Aug 12
hai asliah..nice to see you again.. what your bad memories that ever make you always blame yourself?? and make your sleeping is not good??
@bnpraveen (172)
• India
27 Sep 11
hai friend i agree for some extent, remembering bad memories might hurts you, but it is the memory which teach us what not to do, so in my opinion every one should remember bad memories also then sure he wont repeat the same., any way bad memory is negative energy, iam pointing out to proceed with positive energy by [warning ourself] remembering negative(bad memories)
@adhyz82 (36289)
• Indonesia
28 Sep 11
maybe.. what about crying for stopping remembering the bad memories..do you think it`s useful??
@Triple0 (1907)
• Australia
27 Sep 11
I'm kinda like that, sometimes when I'm just watching TV or working on my school work, a bad memory might suddenly cross my mind and I really hate it when it happens. Sometimes a very bad memory that you wish to forget crawls back into your brain and then you just can't stop thinking about it. For me though, I'll think about it for a bit, and feel a little depressed but then the next moment when I'm doing something else I'll forget about it unless something reminds me of that memory. Right now your discussion just reminded me of some of my bad memories but I learn to forget. Memories are hard to forget but if you don't think about it then you'll fine.
@adhyz82 (36289)
• Indonesia
8 Aug 12
so when the bad memories appear in your mind, what happen in your mind?/ and what are you doing if you remember again the bad memories??
@sender621 (14956)
• United States
26 Sep 11
Memories are memories. Some of them are good and some of them are not so good. Sometimes the bad memories help you not to make the same mistaakes again. We can't pick and choose what we remember. We have to accept our memories for what they mean to our lives.
@adhyz82 (36289)
• Indonesia
27 Sep 11
i like this status... yes, you are right, we can`t select them one by one but we had heart for selecting it..what do you think?
@megamatt (14333)
• United States
26 Sep 11
I think that there are so many bad memories that we are going to have throughout our lives, that it can taint things if we really think about them all too much. There are going to be a lot of times where I think that there is going to be a supreme amount of negativity around us in the present. Therefore, should we really let the negativity from the past also affect us? I think that we should learn from the past but not really dwell on that all too much. It has happened, whatever is done, is done, there is really no way to change it to say the very least. No matter how much that we would like to change it to say the very least. There are just many times where the past can be something that can be a sticking point. However to dwell on it for too long, it ruins the quality of the present.
@adhyz82 (36289)
• Indonesia
26 Sep 11
some people say that no need for seeing our past..just go to our future... sometimes we make mistake, we must learn from mistake but not for crying what do you think about it??
• Philippines
26 Sep 11
Hi there adhyz82. Okay, here's what I think. I agree to some of what you said and I disagree to some. Anyway, I think that bad memories stimulate negative thoughts to us. It's inevitable not to remember some bad memories in our past. The thing is, even though they may be really bad, it's really about how we perceive such memories and deal with them that really counts. You see, if for example, you might have had a very bad experience in your childhood or somewhere in your past, it's really up to you how to change your perception with them. Sometimes, people live in the past and dwell on pain too much that they forget the goodness and happiness that the present can bring. On the other hand, bad memories can be a good thing as well especially if they are the reasons why you are what you are right now, in a good way. Maybe one might have experienced extreme poverty and difficulties at a very young age. And if one has those memories responsible for one's success and strength as an individual, then I don't think there's anything wrong with it. It's really all about perception.
@adhyz82 (36289)
• Indonesia
26 Sep 11
maybe...i like your comment pen.. a bad mistake in our past, we must take as good lesson for us now and the future.. maybe the scientics said, don`t waste too much for your past and only crying for it..it can make you pessimistics about your life
• China
26 Sep 11
I agree sommewhat.I am not the scientist,so i cant see any other reasonable factor which just perfect warranted the issue.It just sound good and fit common peoples mind.
@adhyz82 (36289)
• Indonesia
26 Sep 11
yes, i am not scientisct too but i feel this is true...sometimes our mind can give effect for our body
@paula27661 (15900)
• Australia
26 Sep 11
I have to agree that constant focussing on negative past events and feelings can certainly affect our present life. I started recalling bad memories from an abusive childhood when I was around 35 and the memories became more and more vivid until I became very angry due to these negative recollections. I had to undergo counselling in order to learn how to put the bad experiences behind me and move forward in a much more positive and blessed life which is what I have today. There are times when simply deciding to move on is not enough and professional help is required but I can vouch for the fact that it is definitely worth doing!
@adhyz82 (36289)
• Indonesia
26 Sep 11
yes, with remembering everyday about bad action in our past, can bother our focus, can bother our target in the future...
1 person likes this
@r03249 (357)
• Philippines
27 Sep 11
Consciously forgetting something is suppression. And I think it ain't healthy at all. I think we should first try to accept what happen for us to move on. If we don't happen to accept it, this will hunt us for the rest of our lives. But I think suppression is goo at times to protect our ego and to defend ourselves from being hurt, but only for a while. If you constantly do it and never accept reality, I don't think that will make you any good.
@Neicy30 (56)
• United States
26 Sep 11
I agree. I have family members who i love and adore but can not be around them all the time because of that negative energy. It's draining. We all have bad memories of some sort but some people tend to just focus on that bad memory and don't know how to move forward. My brother is big on remembering all the bad things he's ever gone thru and i mean memories from when he was a toddler! It's almost like the "bad" memories out weight the "good" memories which shouldn't be. We shared the same childhood and we had a good one. Yes things happen but there are so many families and children out there who have gone thru worse, so i can say we did have a good childhood. And because he focuses on all these negative things, it's turned him into a negative being and its sad because life is a blessing and it's precious. We all go thru things in life but the only way to live a happy life is to not focus on those negative things and if you do, let it be to push you forward in a positive way.