How to Tell Your In-laws You Wants to Moved Out?

United States
October 10, 2011 4:34pm CST
I really wanted to start fresh and independently, but since my husband and I are renting a house with my in laws I sometimes feel that I have no privacy and can not go whenever we want without them tagging along. It is hard to cook too and prepare food because we have small kitchen. And it is hard to decide on things and move freely because we are always thinking about their feeling.They are "onion skinned" or grouchy. I really want to start on our own but I feel guilty too...
2 people like this
5 responses
• United States
11 Oct 11
Yes they may feel like they are loosing out once you move out. Although they are being difficult, they will feel the sense of loss once you do move out. I probably would start hinting that although you enjoy your time there you and your husband would like a place of your own. Do so by not saying you don't like it there so that they not get offended. It will be a bit hard for them in the beginning but they will get use to it. Let them know you appreciate all they have done thus far and that the both of you feel it is time to have a place of your own.
• United States
11 Oct 11
They are so martyr especially the female... She always tripping on our conscience... i was hining it before then she talked to my husband behind my back and asked if i wanted to moved out,my husband said that it is every wife's wants...then she began playing the wronged party and had the silent treatment.
• United States
11 Oct 11
I am sorry she is giving you a difficult time. She will with time accept and you will all be happier. Something about a little distance that does bring people together sometimes. I really do hope all goes well.
@jaiho2009 (39142)
• Philippines
11 Oct 11
Simply told them that you want to live on your own. It is a common knowledge that once you start a family, you need to be on your own and not under one roof. It's really hard to be with our in-laws even if they are good people. I have one of the best in-laws in the world,but still I don't want to live with them. The freedom is not the same when you are living with them. Freedom like...you can sleep and wake up whatever time you want and no one is watching your every moves. Try to talk with them and whether they accept or agree or not,you have to decide,its for your own good before the relationship breaks. have a good day
• United States
11 Jan 12
the only freedom that I want is to go out wherever we want without thinking about her tagging along. I regret living with them,they are nice people and I have known them my such a long time but living with them,having different personalities is hard.
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
11 Oct 11
I think I would talk this over with my husband first. Is he on the same page as you with it? If so, I'd just have him tell them. It is really hard to live with others sometimes. And who knows...maybe they are feeling the same way. Feeling as you do, I would look at it as a means of saving your relationship with them. If you continue to live with them like you are then surely you'll come to despise them. It sounds as if it's time for a little distance.
• United States
11 Oct 11
We talked about it, but he said that we should wait for his parents to take innitiative in letting us have a place of our own,but I think if we wait It will not happen... The parents wants to lluve with their son forever... So to avoid anymore misunderstanding with my husband I stopped asking him to have our own place.
@sjvg1976 (41134)
• Delhi, India
11 Oct 11
Hello angelic, In INDIAN culture unlike western culture people like to have joint family.I know its hard for a son to ask his parents that he wants to live separately but i beleive if you are willing to live separate then you should get separate from your in laws now happily otherwise if you stretch the things you will surely have a stressful life and may be possible have arguements with you in laws later. So its better to get separate happily than after having quarrels which happens in every bride and her MIL.
@sjvg1976 (41134)
• Delhi, India
11 Oct 11
Always take your husband in confidence and try to explain him all this thing and always remember ask your husband to talk to his parents regarding this matter its better if you don't directly talk to your in laws .
@ardoy0731 (7308)
• Philippines
11 Oct 11
Host a dinner and try to explain to then carefully the reason why you are moving out.I think they will understand it.