My daughter does not know when to quit.

United States
October 16, 2011 7:41pm CST
She is on the phone asking me if her homeless boyfriend could stay with me. It just so happens I let him in to talk to her on the phone. But,come on what is she thinking here. If I even thought about letting him stay here adrian would leave. Adrian was mad today because he was here talking to her on the phone. I do what I can but I can't do that. now she says no one cares about him.
5 people like this
11 responses
• United States
17 Oct 11
Stay strong. Tough love hurts you more then they are making themselves out to be hurt. You have the respect for yourself not to let someone who treats you rudely into your home keep it. He can find his own home or beg to be forgiven by those he has hurt himself.
4 people like this
• United States
17 Oct 11
I told my daughter that is not my problem. I can't help him with a place to stay. I told her to ave him right the wrongs he made with people in his family. his grandmother lives around the corner and does like like him because he is dating a black girl and does not speak Spanish. ow sad..
3 people like this
@Hatley (164507)
• Garden Grove, California
17 Oct 11
yes gifts let his family h elp him as he has ruined things betweenyou and him. how can she still love the man?
1 person likes this
• United States
17 Oct 11
Things will get better. At some point they will hit rock bottom. Yes they will blame you for a bit of that for not helping and then they will begin to rebuild their lives and relationships. It is hard to watch of coarse but it will eventually work out.
@Amanda81587 (3046)
• United States
17 Oct 11
I honestly think that it is very selfish of her to ask you to let him stay there. Did you explain to her that he almost killed her and that she is grown up now as is he. It is time to live for yourself. She needs to be respectful to your feelings as well. It is your time to be happy and with Adrian you are. I would not let him live there. I would tell her to tell him to find some family to move into because after all the crap you have been through with them two that should not be an option.
@winterose (39918)
• Canada
17 Oct 11
I don't know why he is homeless but maybe you can help him find a place to stay like at a rooming house, a half way house public housing whatever.
2 people like this
@stephcjh (32327)
• United States
17 Oct 11
Oh my gosh. I swear your daughter and my daughter are twins. My daughter puts me through the exact same thing. She totally wears me out every day. She constantly tried to manipulate me too.
1 person likes this
• United States
17 Oct 11
That has to be very difficult for you Steph and no matter how much peace you would like to have with your daughter sometimes their demands are out of this world. I do hope you have emotional support and that your husband is helping you through this.
• Canada
17 Oct 11
You just tell her, and tell him, that if she and he want people to care for him (and for what she thinks of him for that matter) then he'd better get back on his feet! Get a job, get a place, get rid of the criminal record, do what he needs to do to become a productive citizen again, and not just some homeless schmuck of a person, barely even fit to be called human!!
1 person likes this
@Hatley (164507)
• Garden Grove, California
17 Oct 11
oh my gifts what is she thinking? that boy almost killed her and paid for it but in my eyes hes still not good for her. now she wants you to pay for him staying with you, what is wrong with that girl? give him up. look for a young man who will not try to kill you if he gets upset with you. well gee whiz shes just using that to black mail you into giving in to her. tell her sorry you wo not want him in your house as he is bad news.I wish he would find a girl of his own and leave Kaykay alone. I bet you do too.
@dorannmwin (36698)
• United States
19 Oct 11
I honestly think that there are times that being a parent is one of the hardest things that a person can do. If you don't want her to really be with this boy, then you definitely don't want him to be living under your roof. Besides that, you are your daughter's mother and not her boyfriend's mother, his parents should be the ones that are taking care of him. I know that this is a lot for you to deal with, but in order to be the most effective parent that you can be, it is necessary that you stay strong.
@sid556 (31005)
• United States
18 Oct 11
Gifts, DO NOT BUY INTO THIS!!! It is your home and your rules. Stand your ground. If you give in and allow him to stay even a night then it will all be over. I guarantee you that he'll be there every night and you'll be on here all upset because you won't know how to get rid of him. Don't forget...he beat your daughter to a pulp. You should be counting yourself amongst those that "don't care about him". I honestly don't blame Adrian for being angry that he was there talking to her. He beat your daughter. Please read my discussion I just started the other day about the girl whose boyfriend beat her. Please you don't have to respond but you should read it. The girl that I talk about in that discussion could so easily be your daughter. I understand that you can't do much in the way of controlling KK's heart but you can surely follow your own and not allow him in your home.
@carmelanirel (20979)
• United States
17 Oct 11
I have a question, why is he at your house talking on your phone??? Does he visit often and why? Maybe he does need someone, but you are not it. What about that church your neighbor took you to? Do they have a mentoring program? Or is there another guy that can take this kid under his wing? I said this before, he does not know how to treat w woman, he needs someone to teach him and it can't be you, he is NOT your responsibility. You need to tell your daughter this and don't allow this boy go into your home, he will just drag you down..
@celticeagle (119330)
• Boise, Idaho
17 Oct 11
He is the one who has made the choices and made it so people don't care much about it. Who would want to get inraveled in his world? She is enough. What is she thinking? She keeps trying to get you to back down. I am proud of you for not doing it. He needs to take care of himself.
@bagarad (12674)
• Paso Robles, California
17 Oct 11
Absolutely do not let him in again. If he has physically harmed your daughter, he could do the same to you. And once you let someone live in your house it can be very difficult to get him out again. Let him make peace with his own family. That's what he needs to do. Don't enable him. I could have worked things out with my daughter if so many "helpful" people hadn't been there to take her in. She would not have gone to the streets. She would have come home. To take in someone who can't get along with his own family doesn't help anyone. It would just keep this loser from solving his problems that much longer. He certainly isn't worth losing Adrian over.