friends passed

United States
October 19, 2011 1:33pm CST
Do you ever wonder why someone comes into your life to only go out? some friends are dear and you would never think you would not ever be friends and then poofa they are gone. It is hurtful to think the time i spend being a great friend who cared so deep to be left thinking what is wrong? whats going on? why dont they want t talk to me. I think someone said something maybe i said that was taken the wrong way because i would never hurt anyone it is not in my nature. even after months it hurts to think of the loss. how do i put it aside and move on to trust again?
13 responses
@mummyof2 (10)
• United Arab Emirates
19 Oct 11
hi! i know it hurts when you are friends with someone and they disppear or move on without giving any reasons or justifications or clarifications. but thats what life is all about. why feel bad about someone like this. maybe that person never deserved having a friend like you. Havents you heard of the saying whatever happens, happens for the best. So just think positively and move on. why brood over something which would only cause more hurt for you. all you can do is next time when you are friends with someone dont get too attached or take people for granted.thats all i can say. think positively n move on.cherish the good memories you have had with your friends.
• United States
19 Oct 11
thank you. thats what i been trying to do. they were like a bother to me and it was wonderful to talk each day and to share are lives as we both watched are kids grown and become grandparents and share those joys along the way. i just miss that kind of friendship. I am sure the Lord has new friends down the road for me. thanks again Mummyof2
• United Arab Emirates
20 Oct 11
I know how one feels. But then i guess as long as we have justification for ourselves and our actions. the others attitude should not matter. Also i feel in todays world the friendship is more materialistic and selfish than being loyal,true and emotional. Everyone is so busy with their own priorities and life that sometimes people dont tend to realise the intensity of hurt they cause others. They might lack being sensitive. Only when they go throught the same ordeal would they realise. So just sit and back and enjoy yourself. Always be the good person you are. Believe in yourself and sure enough you would find a friend who would appreciate your qualities and YOU.
@WakeUpKitty (8707)
• Netherlands
19 Oct 11
No I never wondered why someone comes in my life but leaves also sooner or later. I find it normal. I moved many times, lived in many different places and I find it normal you meet new people each time and say goodbye to other people. My life is a journey just like other people there lives. We have to move on and learn and live. Not always stay at the same place with the same people. That is not normal. Some people are just there to past some time with, others are there to help you in a difficult period of your life, but this doesn't mean they stay friends for life. It also doesn't mean that they have less value because those who where there when needed will always be remembered. And this has nothing to do with sadness or being hurt. It is something to cherish and be happy about.
• United States
19 Oct 11
I agree there was so many good times it wonderful to know at least there was that time in my life that was good. thanks
• United States
21 Oct 11
This has happened to me a lot recently. A lot of the time, it has something to do with the person and what they're facing in life, or what there personality is...Nothing to do with you. Unless you're saying extremely negative things all of the time, or nit picking them, then I strongly believe it isn't something you're doing that is making them disappear. It probably has something to do with their own life or their own issues and insecurities. I just recently lost a lot of weight, and many of my so called "friends" just vanished due to their own jealousy. Sometimes friends just become distant and disappear due to their own issues. There is nothing you can do except make new friends and surround yourself with more deserving people. :)
@surekharathi (14134)
• India
20 Oct 11
Yes friend I wonder and really when someone comes in our life as friend and then they gone hurts us and never forget them. Even we cant hurt to anyone but we dont know how they feel we hurts if we also gone from their life due to any reason.
@tamirs (1808)
• Philippines
20 Oct 11
People come and people go..and when they go they leave marks that we can cherish.. If you think you did no wrong to them, let them go as they want for they will sure come back its up to you to have them again or not.. If they wont comeback just be happy that once you had your chance to share with them the happy moments of your life..
@Greninee (369)
• Philippines
20 Oct 11
yeah..it really hurts especially if you were close to that friend of yours...but remember my friend, change is the only permanent thing in this world..we have to move on and adapt to changes.
@bingskee (5237)
• Philippines
20 Oct 11
surely there is a reason. sadly, some reasons are not valid reasons at all. if you believed that you tried everything to be a good friend, then it is not your loss. you deserve better. i know it hurts but you have to move on.
@megamatt (14331)
• United States
20 Oct 11
Such is the chaotic nature of life I am afraid. There are many times where I think that a friend is going to be with me for a long time. But there are times where I start seeing a lot less of them. And then barely any of them at all. People just really do in fact drift apart over time. I think that as we get older and we gain different life experiences, we are not going to connect as well as we would with our friends in the past. Now granted, there are going to be many times where I think that we can have life long friendships. And those should be cherished. Still in the end, we are going to sadly drift apart for whatever reason. And by the time we realize what has occurred, it is really going to be slightly too late for us to really notice what has occurred. Cherishing the friendships we have is great, as they could vanish into the night before too long.
@phanvy (11)
20 Oct 11
Losting a friend is terribel! I am alway cared of me by my friend! My friend are wonderful. IF I was you, I would move on trust again! That is difficult. I see that. BUT, do you lost a friend!
• Philippines
20 Oct 11
Well that's the nature of life, people will come and go. As for me, I don't really get involve into a friendship thing. People are always user in nature, I mean they are just there when you something to offer, and then they're gone.
@stephcjh (32328)
• United States
19 Oct 11
This has happened to me all of my life. I have never had any true friends, other than my husband. It is hard to move on and trust again. I have tried it several time and the most recent time, was within the last year and it was the same old thing.
@stary1 (6622)
• United States
19 Oct 11
LauraElrod I am sorry this happened to you. I think I would ask the person what went wrong. I would be so curious to know that even if what they said might hurt me more, I want to know. I also feel somtime things are misunderstood and since some people do not like confrontations they just go away. That'sad because if a friendship can be saved it would be the better alternative. Best wishes to you if you do try to contact them.
• United States
19 Oct 11
Everyone's different with trust, how they treat their friends, and what makes them happy to be someone's friend, but have a higher chance of doing the same, when they are hurt. Since everyone can be so different, it's hard to know who to trust, but easy to know who is being a good friend. If they're not even discussing with you why they're doing this, then they weren't a good friend in the first place, because a good friend would let, the person they care about, know at least the reason why. I've always had close friends, who all eventually drifted away from me, whether it was because they had to move, their parents didn't like me, or they wanted to spend more time with their girlfriend/boyfriend. Even though I still have one of my close friends, who ended up moving all the way to Virginia, from Texas, we rarely ever talk to each other anymore, since we have separate lives now, yet it shouldn't really prevent us from calling each other. But it seems that our calls happened to gradually decrease from everyday to once a week, to once a month, and then to only once a year. It's disappointing to feel someone you knew so well to slowly vanquish.