pending friends

@Anne18 (11036)
October 26, 2011 4:43pm CST
I have just been to look in my pending friends section, there are loads of you my fellow mylotters that I have requested to be friends with and loads are still pending to be accepted. I would really like to be friends with these lovely people. My question is.... How often do you go into your pending friends box and accept the people who want to be your friend? I bet you are all now rushing off to look at your friends requested pending section. My pending friends box is empty, just in case you wobdering!!LOL Happy mylotting. Anne18
15 people like this
41 responses
@CTHanum (8254)
• Malaysia
27 Oct 11
Once I have new request I will be there whether I will accept them or not. Id they are new members I will look at their activities whether they are active members or not otherwise I will reject their request. I don't to accept those who are here just to pass me with all their website offers and scams. I will wait till they reach certain number of posts just to know if they are serious to be here or not. Right now I still got 26 requests from them and from what I can see is they are not an active member here. So I think I will delete ll of them~(^^)
4 people like this
@Jlyn10 (10439)
• Malaysia
27 Oct 11
Wow, CT, you left 26 friends requests pending for so long?
3 people like this
@Anne18 (11036)
27 Oct 11
I think I shall also delete some of them, if they want to be my friend then they will have to come and find me, I tried to find them so now it'll be there turn to find me
2 people like this
@CTHanum (8254)
• Malaysia
27 Oct 11
@Jlyn Yes. sis. I got them a year ago but I don't want to delete them now as I think it is better for me to keep them in pending list so if the new one account from the same person is coming I can check them from the list. But I think I will delete them soon. Have been waiting for a year and they still have just 4 and 14 posts is really useless right?(^^) @Anne Since the first day I was here I think I am the one who send the friend request. I select those I want to befriend not the other way round. It's very rare to find other members add me in their list since I am not an active discussion starter. So they will see me more and frequently if they start many new discussions as I like to keep and respond to them.(^^)
3 people like this
@marie2052 (3697)
• United States
27 Oct 11
I just run my eyes across the board and make sure I don't have any messages or friends pending. I do have to admit though I will go look and make sure I have something in common with a person that I friend. Its just nice to know you are adding people for a reason not just to add them. Have a nice day.
@Anne18 (11036)
27 Oct 11
Thanks for your comment, it is nice to go and look to see if you have anything in common with people
2 people like this
@Amfyre (515)
• Canada
28 Oct 11
Excellent point Marie I have had to delete afew because of spamming and just out to lunchness... I try to be selective now, making sure we have something in common and that I see the persons actually active on discussions I am on... like you said something in "common"
@Anne18 (11036)
28 Oct 11
Thanks for your value points Amfyre. All oponions most welcomed, more the merrier
@jugsjugs (13046)
26 Oct 11
I tend not to really look in my friend box, as i think that all the people that i have as friends are enough.I feel that there are a lot of people that add other people for the sake of having friends on here the same as other sites.Some of my friends are no longer on here, yet they still have an account, so people do still try to add them.I tend to deny more people than i have added over the years.
4 people like this
@ravisivan (14051)
• India
27 Oct 11
Yes. thee are some who will not accept the friends request freely. I came across a member who has done nearly 5000 postings and he/she has only 3 friends. Great. I sent a request to him about two days back and it is still pending. I will wait for a week. thereafter delete the request. fine.
4 people like this
@Anne18 (11036)
27 Oct 11
Thank you for your reponses, sometimes I think people do like to have lots of friends in there box, makes them look very popular with the huge amout of friends they have. Glad that you both have lots of true friends on here. I have noticed that a few people have only a few friends. That reminds me of why I only have half a dozen christmas cards every year. I decided years ago that after thinking that lots of cards meant you were very popular and had lots of friends etc. I then went through my address book and decided that if I only heard from people at christmas with a joint round robin letter then they weren't really true friends, people who I worked with years ago and never have contact apart from christmas etc. I decided it was better to have half a dozen cards that mean the world to me than 100 plus cards that don't really have any true meaning to me. Does that make any sort of sense? I'm sure you know where I'm coming from and what I'm trying to say.
1 person likes this
• United States
26 Oct 11
I go as soon as I notice that someone is there in the friends box. I haven't looked to see if there are any pending where I requested. I don't request often, but it is disappointing if I see they have ignored me... especially if I know them and have been on their discussions faithfully.
4 people like this
@Hazelme (649)
• United States
27 Oct 11
Hey there Anne! I like your discussion since it happens a lot here in myLot... I like adding more friends to my list. I friend request some people but i don't really request people i mean even though i don't have them as a friend i can still join there discussion. There pros and cons about adding people to your list because some of them send you messages about joining a site or send fake invitations. My pending box is EMPTY TOO LOL. i usually see my friend request when i notice i have new friend request and i often leave it maximum 2 days then approve them. I don't deny anyone here in myLot all of them are MY FRIENDS. :D
@Jlyn10 (10439)
• Malaysia
27 Oct 11
You are right, Hazelme. It is not necessary to add friends since you can also join in their discussions but you won't be getting notifications about new discussions being posted by them.
2 people like this
@Anne18 (11036)
27 Oct 11
If anyone sends me stuff about joining a site or fake invitations then I just delete staight away. I only want to have fun on mylot, I was caught out before when I was here on mylot and it messed up the pc, hence hubby asked me not ot come on mylot, since being back it has all been ok as I don't open anything etc.
1 person likes this
@Anne18 (11036)
27 Oct 11
I know it seems to happen alot so I thought it was worth starting a discussion about it, bring it back up to everyone's attention
@ravisivan (14051)
• India
27 Oct 11
I look at bracket in friends every time I log in. For the last many days it is NIl. Whenever I get a request I ok it. Regarding this you were prompt in accepting my request a month ago or so. I did a similar exercise two months back and deleted my requests in respect of members who were active but not accepted mine.
3 people like this
@Jlyn10 (10439)
• Malaysia
27 Oct 11
Hi Mr Happy. I remember I accepted yours immediately. Or was it me who sent you the FR?
3 people like this
@ravisivan (14051)
• India
27 Oct 11
I am not able to remember the sequence. However making friendship with you was not an issue--either you accepted it or I accepted your request. have a nice day.
3 people like this
@Anne18 (11036)
27 Oct 11
Glad that you became friends really quickly
@Jlyn10 (10439)
• Malaysia
27 Oct 11
Hi Anne I only go to check my friends request when the "friends" tab shows a number there. I usually will add all friends request sent to me. It wouldn't be nice not to add them since they have already sent me a request but if I don't see any activity from them, them I will delete them off later.
2 people like this
@Anne18 (11036)
27 Oct 11
It is nice to have lots of active friends, some of my friends haven't been active for weeks and weeks, I wonder if they have left, when I left last time I did say goodbye and explained why I was leaving, I just didn't dissapear
1 person likes this
@CTHanum (8254)
• Malaysia
27 Oct 11
We will have no idea why is it so as we don't have chance to know them either as they sent us the friend request and suddenly they disappeared. I don't think they will feel the need to inform their leaving as they have not yet felt the relationship between us~(^^) Sis Jlyn, I always look and check my friend request tab if the number change adn increased from 26 to other number.lol(^^)
2 people like this
@Jlyn10 (10439)
• Malaysia
27 Oct 11
@Anne I wasn't active for the past few days. But I will always come online on myLot whenever I get the chance. Some don't really know how to earn on myLot and they feel that they don't earn much here, so that's probably why they left. @CTH But why are you leaving them pending for so long. Just add them for now and then later on you can delete them if you find them not active.
1 person likes this
27 Oct 11
i never go into my pending friends.. ever. because i don't add people lol! i know it sounds really harsh but when i come to mylot i just bang through the discussions and responses from people that are already my friends, and i don't generally have the time to actually search other discussions to FIND new people. now and again i may add someone whos response i like on a discussion i responded too, but i usually just let people add me :)
2 people like this
@Anne18 (11036)
27 Oct 11
No you are not harsh, just doing mylot your way, everyone does mylot differently and that is good as we are all different.
2 people like this
27 Oct 11
i prefer to spend more time actually hitting the + button for all my current mylot friends, than to try and make lots of new ones.. and the ones i have on my friends list at the moment are all fantastic people :)
@Anne18 (11036)
27 Oct 11
I also have some fantastic friends on mylot, its up to us how we use mylot and we can have as many friends as we wish and make them when and how we wish.
@Sreekala (18767)
• India
27 Oct 11
Hello Anne, I don't have any request for pending. Recently I am rarely adding friends. If anybody sent a request I can add them as soon as I see the request. In case I made a request and if the person keeps me as pending, then I can wait only for one week, after that I will delete that request. I am not a new member here so I don’t think I have to wait for months to get an acceptance. But most of the people are kind enough to add me quickly. You were in my list earlier and I don’t know why you deleted me from the list.
@Anne18 (11036)
27 Oct 11
I don't know if you were in my list or not as I don't recall your name. All I can say is I'm very sorry and would love to be your friend and chat on mylot. Do not know why I deleted you, by mistake I'm sure, my pc skills aren't always that good. Would love to be your friend
2 people like this
@Sreekala (18767)
• India
28 Oct 11
It is alright dear, I am glad that you added me again. I got your last notification (in my mail) on new your new discussion July 9, 2009, that time You had not any picture in your profile. After this topic I missed your topics in my inbox. I don't know what happened in the meantime. Thank you so much for adding me again.
@Anne18 (11036)
28 Oct 11
So pleased that we are friends again, I'm sure we will now keep bumping into each other very often now, hope so.
@katsmeow1213 (28715)
• United States
28 Oct 11
Anytime I see that there is a friend request I go look at it, but 90% of the time I do not accept because they either do not have many posts (or none at all) and I haven't seen them in any discussions. I'll only accept requests from names that look familiar, as in we've chatted in discussion a few times.
2 people like this
@Anne18 (11036)
29 Oct 11
Thank you very much for sharing your way.
• United States
27 Oct 11
Personally I don't go there that often. I don't even realize that have pending friend requests until I actually start browsing through mylot that I actually notice I have pending friend requests. I get so involved with responding and discussing on mylot I fail to notice my inbox.
2 people like this
@Anne18 (11036)
29 Oct 11
Yes my friend, mylot does take over your mind sometimes and you do get so involved with responding and discussing and trying ot catch up with the commenting, all takes time and it depends how much time we get here on mylot as well
@writersedge (22579)
• United States
27 Oct 11
I go about once a week. Usually no one there has answered any of my discussions and I have nothing in common with them. Many have zero or 1 under their name for a week, month, etc. So eventually I delete them.
2 people like this
@Anne18 (11036)
29 Oct 11
Once a week is fine, its what ever suits us and we all get different amounts of time to spend on mylot and we all do things differently which in life is a very good thing.
@pahak627 (4206)
• Philippines
27 Oct 11
Every time I open my account here I always go to the friend section and when there is a friend request, I immediately approve it. I don't have pending friend requests here. But I have friend requests which were not yet accepted. I just don't know why.
2 people like this
@Anne18 (11036)
28 Oct 11
Hi there, hope you are having a good day, sunny here in England. Thanks for your comment by dear frind
@rachael5760 (2455)
• Israel
27 Oct 11
When I have time I go and approve the pending friends. I had already approved one before I saw you message, so I am not rushing off to approve friends. The Friend system is a way that helps all of us, to see different viewpoints and enriches the MyLot experience
@Anne18 (11036)
28 Oct 11
Thank you very much for your imput, yes it does help to enrich mylot for everyone and works differently for everyone.
@louievill (15495)
• Philippines
27 Oct 11
I accept friends as soon as i see them to give everybody a fair chance, we will never know who would be a good and real friend and sometimes a mylot rising star not unless we try them, I hate it when my friendship is ignored so I just try to avoid these people, they do not know what they are missing LOL (just kidding)
2 people like this
@Anne18 (11036)
27 Oct 11
That's right people don't know what they are missing!!!! Everyone does dervserve a good chance in mylot and we all need help to help us up the stars etc
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (52205)
• Delhi, India
27 Oct 11
HI! I keep checking new requests. I do not receive many requests like you. I accept only those, who have at least 500 posts under their belt. I check their profile and if I see that they start some interesting posts, then I immediately accept them. I do not feel like accepting who have zero posts or very less number of posts.
2 people like this
@Anne18 (11036)
27 Oct 11
Its good to check profiles to see if you have any common ground, a little bit of common ground can help get things going and we can learn new things from people who we don't have much in common with. The spice of life helps the world go round
• India
27 Oct 11
Hi Anne, myLot notification system is excellent. The moment one logs in, the navigation tabs in header in the dashboard clearly show pending activities under the respective tabs. Yes, while new friend requests coming to me are indicated by a bracketed number, friend requests of mine pending approval are not shown in a similar way. So, its only when you open the relative tab that you can find the pending requests. So you are right, if I'm too engrossed in discussions, commenting or other activity without being aware of requests pending with other myLotters, they pie up there!! I do check periodically. I send friend requests if after some interaction on the discussions I find the members appear to me to be of the same disposition. I won't send them randomly or in large number, though there may not be an issue. Of course, some people may not like requests just flooding them or they may start feeling someone is trying to spam them. Liked commenting on this interesting topic. :)
2 people like this
@Anne18 (11036)
27 Oct 11
Hi there, thank you very much for your reply, yes I do agree that you can get caught up and forget to look. So pleased that you have liked commenting on my discussion about this.
1 person likes this
@blue65packer (11835)
• United States
27 Oct 11
I don't get alot of friend requests. When I do and decide if I want them to be a friend I wait at lest a day before I approve them. I used to be picky on who I chose but I don't anymore. I was getting way to picky and I am not anymore!
2 people like this
@Anne18 (11036)
27 Oct 11
Glad that you aren't picky anymore , else you may not have chose me to be your friend, thanks for your reply
1 person likes this
@sjvg1976 (12672)
• Delhi, India
27 Oct 11
Hello Anne, Whenever i log in to MYLOT the first thing i check is the private message and friend request.I always check the friend request if in between mylotting it comes and seriously i never disapprove any friend request as i don't find any reason to disapprove it.I never keep any friend request pending.
27 Oct 11
think she meant people that YOU have friend requested, and they haven't accepted you yet.
1 person likes this
@Anne18 (11036)
27 Oct 11
That's right, my pending box of people who I asked to be friends with is more than two pages, wish people would either accept me as there friend or delete me, don't mind either way.
1 person likes this
@CTHanum (8254)
• Malaysia
27 Oct 11
I still got a few of them which they still not approved yet. I am not sure why they don't want to accept my requests but I think I should delete all of them~ Even if they did not approve my request I think I still can be in their discussions. Never mind.(^^)
2 people like this
@ElicBxn (59906)
• United States
28 Oct 11
I hate to see the number up there so if I have anyone requesting my friendship, I might let them hang for a week to see if they 1 - increase their numbers and 2 - respond to any of my discussions... There are certain people I won't accept any more. A certain age group from a certain area of the world I've discovered have no interests in common. I do check to make sure I'm not misjudging them, but so far their only interests are 1-making money, 2-cricket, 3-football (soccer) and 4-Bollywood.
1 person likes this
@Anne18 (11036)
29 Oct 11
I agree we don't have to accept anyone we don't want to, so that way we shouldn't really leave people hanging for ages, Bounce was saying he has some pending friends still from 4 years ago who haven't accepted his request. We must do what we feel is correct for us.
1 person likes this
@ElicBxn (59906)
• United States
30 Oct 11
making a request and being requested are a different kettle of fish, but I do tend to leave them up longer too...
@Anne18 (11036)
30 Oct 11
Good job we are all different on here and do things our own way
1 person likes this