Have you ever developed a crush on a MyLot friend?
By grandpa_lash
@grandpa_lash (5225)
Australia
October 27, 2011 12:59am CST
Psychologists tell us that we all have in our unconscious a sort of template of the things that physically attract us to other humans, one which we are quite unaware of, but as soon as we see "that" face we are panting at the starting gates. More often than not it all goes nowhere, especially in the scenario I put here, but in many cases I'm sure this is the explanation of love at first sight and soul-mateship.
So, have you suddenly found yourself eagerly awaiting the appearance of one of your MyLot friends, and do you find yourself innocently flirting with him/her, all without the slightest encouragement and without any hope of it going beyond fantasy, and without really knowing why?
Perhaps you have stumbled across someone who fits your subconscious template.
Lash
5 people like this
21 responses
@grandpa_lash (5225)
• Australia
27 Oct 11
I met my partner (7 years) online, but not on any social network site lol. Do I assume you went R/L? Or is that too personal a question?
Lash
2 people like this
@grandpa_lash (5225)
• Australia
28 Oct 11
Er, not entirely, I think the current is in the wrong direction. Pass me the compass.
Oh, and a glass of Stoli.
Lash
1 person likes this
@jaiho2009 (39142)
• Philippines
27 Oct 11
Sure it happens and there is nothing wrong with it.
What is wrong when we flirt to everyone aint?
I have a crush with one mylotter and one alone and I never flirt with any other.
I stick with that one mylotter and now I miss him 
@grandpa_lash (5225)
• Australia
27 Oct 11
I was just looking at your coming back discussion, and welcome back, even though I don't think we've spoken before.
Yes, you're right, flirting with everyone would be silly, and even if it is only flirting it still has some value that doesn't need to be thinned out by spreading it too far.
Lash
3 people like this
I have a crush with one mylotter and one alone
Let me give Madonna something to think about - Who's that Guy!!!
NO FLIRTING for me
@stanley777 (9402)
• Philippines
27 Oct 11
I guess to some there could be a possibility but for me it's just friendship. To share my ideas, opinions and personal experiences on topic initiated by members for discussion. I want to gain more friends especially from other countries through mylot and of course not to mention the earnings we make trough comments posting.
As you have said we all have in our subconscious mind a sort of template that physically attracts us to others. And before you know it you already feel or attracted to a person even you have not met her/him in person. So it's possible.
@grandpa_lash (5225)
• Australia
27 Oct 11
I've been here on and off for about 4 years, and all the rest of the time it's been "just friends", as you say. This crush caught me a bit by surprise, which is why I thought it was worth a discussion.
Lash
2 people like this
@karimjessa (66)
• Canada
27 Oct 11
I get infatuated with "faces" all the time, and not just on myLot. I say faces because I never know anyone well enough to develop a crush based on personality. For me, just seeing an amazing photo on a profile is enough to make me stumble.
And, yes, I do try to flirt all the time. But I never succeed. I suppose it's because of all the horror stories of experiences on the Internet. No one believes that there can be such a thing as harmless flirting.
So all I do is fall for pretty faces, and wish someone would flirt with me.
By the way, to all who read this, take this as an invitation to indulge in some old fashioned flirting. References from my wife and kids available upon request.
Karim.
2 people like this
@grandpa_lash (5225)
• Australia
27 Oct 11
Well in truth, if my crush was just a pretty face I wouldn't be calling it a crush, just lust, but the interchanges I have had with her and that I see her having with others has shown that her personality is compatible with what I enjoy. So, harmless flirting it is.
Lash
2 people like this
@enelym001 (8322)
• Philippines
27 Oct 11
I'm just three weeks in myLot and not crushing on someone. Since you have opened this topic up, I assumed you do have a crush with a fellow myLot member...
But I have to agree with you, sometimes even if we don't actually see the face of someone we do feel something or admire someone through the way they write or they expresses their selves in writing ^^
But I have to agree with you, sometimes even if we don't actually see the face of someone we do feel something or admire someone through the way they write or they expresses their selves in writing ^^2 people like this
@grandpa_lash (5225)
• Australia
27 Oct 11
I don't have to have been to war to write a war song, and I don't have to have a crush to write this discussion.
But yes, lol, I do. And at my advanced age. My partner finds it most amusing.
Lash
2 people like this
@spyboysatya (148)
• India
27 Oct 11
I'm single right now, I had girlfriends but not a single one lasts for more than 3-4 months, means can you believe it not a single one for at least six month, and yes you are right many i did found through social networking and had a crush on them there...
but i know in my-lot many of them doesn't put there own snaps on profile maximumly some models or actresses, so I don't care here, but flirting is in my blood, I see a girl and my head starts thinking to flirt with her and without knowing me I just do it...
but never got any template at night, so I feel never fallen in true love cause I think when anyone starts getting in someones nerves specially at night on dreams thats the feeling you need to just fall in what, you know better...
2 people like this
@GreenMoo (11834)
•
27 Oct 11
There are certainly some myLotters who's appearance in my inbox excites me more than others. There are some of those who I'd like to know more about and perhaps meet to see what they're really like. I feel I'm on the same wavelength as them, and curiosity drives me to want to know more. I wouldn't go so far as to describe myself as ever having had a crush though. Some of them are certainly far from being my 'type' back in the real world.
2 people like this
@bingskee (5234)
• Philippines
27 Oct 11
does crush here means admiration? because i admire many mylotters, men and women.
i think it is basically normal to admire though one haven't seen the individual in person yet. it is not even about physical attributes at times (no available pic on the profile ha ha ha) but the wit and humor. i fall for those easily. not fall in love though 
anyway, it still falls on befriending i guess. i just hate the word flirting. 
1 person likes this
@grandpa_lash (5225)
• Australia
27 Oct 11
Ah, but this goes that little step beyond mere admiration and possible friendship. As the OP points out, I'm talking about that physical attraction, even if a pic can't really tell us anything.
Lash
@LetranKnight25 (33121)
• Philippines
28 Oct 11
Hello
grandpalash, I had only a few when i was addicted online before. but you're right it is very silly but i have gained friends because of that. the "crush" thing didn't last long though, and am glad it's just nothing more than mere. . besides, it's just a feeling and such goes away in time
grandpalash, I had only a few when i was addicted online before. but you're right it is very silly but i have gained friends because of that. the "crush" thing didn't last long though, and am glad it's just nothing more than mere. . besides, it's just a feeling and such goes away in time
@thesids (22180)
• Bhubaneswar, India
27 Oct 11
Hi grandpa_lash
How much I wished I could find someone to flirt with here 
. I do agree that there are some people who are more important to me now than they were before but hey, that is not flirting or crush even. It is just friendship or the relationship that has become more personal now.
Personally, ever since I met my loving wife, I have never ever found it necessary or even near to the liking to find anyone to flirt with and so with the crushes too...
Going by the "eagerly awaiting the appearance of one..." sure, there are at least a few who give me sleepless nights when they dont appear anywhere on Mylot over a time span... but can that be termed as a Crush? Doesnt it happen with friends?
How much I wished I could find someone to flirt with here . I do agree that there are some people who are more important to me now than they were before but hey, that is not flirting or crush even. It is just friendship or the relationship that has become more personal now.
Personally, ever since I met my loving wife, I have never ever found it necessary or even near to the liking to find anyone to flirt with and so with the crushes too...
Going by the "eagerly awaiting the appearance of one..." sure, there are at least a few who give me sleepless nights when they dont appear anywhere on Mylot over a time span... but can that be termed as a Crush? Doesnt it happen with friends?1 person likes this
@grandpa_lash (5225)
• Australia
27 Oct 11
Indeed it does happen with friends, but this is a crush. And who said anything about necessary? It just happens.
Lash
1 person likes this
@pahak627 (4558)
• Philippines
27 Oct 11
I haven't had any of that. Honestly I develop a yearning for friendship with a mylot friend. I want to be her friend personally. But I am afraid she won't want me as friend. I include my intention to be her personal friend in one of the discussions that I started.
2 people like this
@madalinuta (91)
• Romania
27 Oct 11
I've never had a crush on a mylot friend. I'm also new here and I don't know many people, but I think you can have a crush on someone you met online. This happened with my actual boyfriend, I've met him through my best friend. At the beginning we were just friends, we used to chat a lot online. After a few months he convinced my that we should meet, but not as a date, just as friends. In the end we fell in love with each other
2 people like this
@kaichoukebz (1190)
• Philippines
27 Oct 11
I have none for the reason that I am new here in MyLot. I am still finding my way here on MyLot to gain some friends. Hope I can have so much friends here.
@sharra1 (6340)
• Australia
28 Oct 11
Hmmmmmmmmm no, I have never had a crush on anyone here. I like a number of people because I enjoy their posts but no crushes. I cannot even remember the last time I ever had a crush on anyone at all. There was someone who flirted with me a couple of years ago and I was flattered but not really interested.
But I am perfectly happy with my partner so I have no interest in anyone else. It is simply my nature, I am a content stay at home person.
@sharra1 (6340)
• Australia
28 Oct 11
I met you long before I found mylot and I knew you were right for me before we met in person. I would have been devastated if I had been proved wrong. Now all these years later I know how right I was. 
I was referring to mylot members that I had never met. @grandpa_lash (5225)
• Australia
28 Oct 11
Are you saying you never had a crush on me? I'm devastated. Where is that single-tail when I need it?
Lash
1 person likes this
@alottodo (3056)
• Australia
28 Oct 11
No grandpa...thank goodness I have the ability not to stumble across some one who fits my subconscious template! for that I would have to be in a coma state and so far I Am quite awake!...jokes asides I would be very weary to develop a crush with any one over the internet...to me my internet friends are just that...my friends I have a lot of respect for my internet friends I value them greatly and I like to keep it that way.
@grandpa_lash (5225)
• Australia
28 Oct 11
A crush is usually a one-sided thing, and as long as the person with the crush doesn't get obsessed and start e-stalking the object of affection, then nothing changes in respect of friendship.
Lash
@grandpa_lash (5225)
• Australia
30 Oct 11
A "crush" is merely a brief infatuation or fantasy, and does not occur by choice. It certainly ain't gonna turn into anything serious, even if the crush is mutual, when things like 30 years of age and thousands of miles separate you.
Lash
@EdnaReyes (2622)
• Philippines
27 Oct 11
I haven't got any crush on mylot friends but I see your point here. Yes, it is human doings to feel particularly attached to something or someone and develop a sort of fascination. If someone would catch my subconscious template, I will be thrill as I have only one strong fascination and love until now who is my hubby.
1 person likes this
@globaldoc (858)
• Philippines
5 Nov 11
On one occasion, I had a relationship with someone I met through Mylot. As it turned out, we did not really end well because of the distance. I would go to their province, but would not be able to see her because of the tight schedule, or when she is not there. Too bad, but it was well worth it.
@khare_1005 (1310)
• India
30 Oct 11
hello grand pa,its not just one but many.my face lits up whenever i find any of my mylot friend to be online to interact with me.but its not crush or flirting or something.its pure fun and nothing else.i never have had a crush on any of my online friend till date.and to have crush on somebody in mylot? hmm am still not that old to truly have a crush on someone.
