I hate it when guys say "I'm just a guy, I have needs.."

@lady1993 (27225)
Philippines
October 28, 2011 1:31am CST
What if the girl would say that then? I have seen some reality shows dealing with problems on infidelity..and that is always what the guy would reason out for his infidelity.. They have need and the girl failed t give it. Is that all they want, is it biological? They should think about that the girl is feeling.. I really hate guys like that..I am not saying this about all the guys okay, just some..
3 people like this
16 responses
@Liliac26 (557)
• Romania
28 Oct 11
All guys and girls have needs, but most of us have learned to contain them when necessary. It's one of the things that separates us from animals. If the 'needy' guy can't do that than maybe he shouldn't engage in a stable, exclusive relationship. Though he probably is in that relationship only to have someone there 24/7 to satisfy his 'needs'. When that doesn't happen, he feels entitled to trample on the girl's feelings. Reminds me of the boyfriend of a former work colleague of mine. Happily, there are a lot of guys out there who aren't like that at all.
2 people like this
@lady1993 (27225)
• Philippines
28 Oct 11
Yeah, but i observed that guys who cheat have become plentier these days.. I don't really now why. Even in our neighborhood there are guys like that.. Maybe it is because their parters are working and can't be with them.
@sjvg1976 (41132)
• Delhi, India
28 Oct 11
Hello Lady, Really its an excuse as needs are equal for both man and woman but its up to them how they constraint it to themselves.You have the reason to feel bad if a guy says it you.I think its not good for man or woman to say it.
1 person likes this
@lady1993 (27225)
• Philippines
28 Oct 11
Yes, it is not good for anyone to say it..but it is just usually the guy who says it. But you are right, people should learn to control their needs and think about their partner too.
@ramonah (211)
• Romania
28 Oct 11
To be very honest I agree on the "needs" but if you have needs and your partner can't provide them, change it, don't share. I'm all in for honesty and not in for sharing. If a guy doesn't like what I can and want to give him.. "hit the road, Jack". In the end it's his choice and his loss or ..gain maybe.. It's a lame excuse for cheating but it's a good excuse for leaving so I'd rather have a guy tell me the truth, even if it hurts, then going behind my back.
@lady1993 (27225)
• Philippines
28 Oct 11
Well, you d have a point, it is always good to hear the truth, and maybe there is something else behind that lame reason too. And it is best to find out from him than other people..
• Calgary, Alberta
28 Oct 11
I dont believe on their excuses because I was currently in a relationship and I was able to fulfill those needs without cheating. I also get to have an ex girlfriend who cares about her virginity and during the times I was in a relationship with her I didnt give a damn about my needs, since you know a guy can lock him self in a room and satisfy that "needs" The reason that ex of mine break up was her lack of ambition and dreams for a simple life (I'm pretty ambitious) My current relationship didnt have infidelity issues neither. You knowmaybe I'm this way cos I saw how my dad cheated on my mom and get a woman abroad pregnant 2 times, (i get along with my half brothers though) I see the conflicts of having to families so I was not into cheating,.
1 person likes this
@lady1993 (27225)
• Philippines
28 Oct 11
I admire you for that..since you usually it is history repeats itself.. good for you that you never cheated. More guys like you should be in the world so less girls would cry.
@airkulet (2700)
• Philippines
28 Oct 11
Absolutely agree with you. All the problems in the relationship shouldn't blame only on girl, things can be better for just a good talk. Maybe some guys just making an excuses but truth is they intend to cheat. Is it on their genes anyway to cheat?
1 person likes this
@lady1993 (27225)
• Philippines
28 Oct 11
I don't think it is in their genes to cheat, since not all guys cheat- even girls do. If they cheat though, they shouldn't make up lame excuses to justify that act- there is never a god reason for doing that since you are hurting many people..
@enelym001 (8322)
• Philippines
28 Oct 11
Yeah so what if the girl says those lines...? I guess the guy would be spanking the girl or killing the other guy. But girls usually gets hurt and cry when guys says this line. Infidelity is something everyone hates. Why commit with one when what some guys wants are fun and pure pleasure?
@lady1993 (27225)
• Philippines
28 Oct 11
Well, there are some guys who are god at first and make girls fall madly in love with them that girls find it hard to break up with them even if he is already cheating..
@chiyosan (30184)
• Philippines
28 Oct 11
Same here! I would probably slap that man if he would reason out like that when he is unfaithful. I think it is just an overused statement with no basis. A man would and should be able to contain himself sexually and not commit an act like that just because they have the urge! grr now i am mad.
@lady1993 (27225)
• Philippines
28 Oct 11
Sorry for making you mad.. I agree with you, they should not just always use this reason and make an effort to fight his urges... I am glad my dad isn't one of these guys. He is alwasy dedicated to his family and devoted to my mom.
@veejay19 (3589)
• India
28 Oct 11
This just shows the shallowness of their thinking.It also shows the one dimension of their mind which cannot look beyond their need.Mind you it applies to both male and female.There are many more things beyond that 'need'.every human has his / her deficiencies and one should learn to adapt and also help the partner to get over their problem.Both should understand each other and make an effort to get along, only then will the relationship develop to a thing of beauty.
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (158606)
• Boise, Idaho
29 Oct 11
These type of guys shouldn't be in manogomous relationships then. It is in our DNA to procreate. But living in society we should be tactful, respectful and patient in our carnal needs. A man who can't do that needs to be single and be sure a woman knows ahead of time that he cannot comit.
@CTHanum (8234)
• Malaysia
28 Oct 11
It is normal and that is why when we pursued a relationship we need to know the first place the reason why he wants you.Is it because of of his needs or other reason. If he just want you to fulfill his needs he will not have any intention to marry you someday. So it is better for girls to keep their dignity not just simply be the one who give everything to them without knowing that he just make you as one of the thing to fulfill their needs. Don't trust them one hundred percent. This could go to both gender male and female.
1 person likes this
@tessa9 (1085)
• Philippines
28 Oct 11
The problem here is with girl still sticking with their boyfriends and what not even if the guy is obviously cheating on them. Girls should have more self worth and stop trying to blame themselves if the guys cheat. I have a very good role model, my aunt, and she teaches me that you should not change yourself to please a guy. A change for the better is good and you should do it ONLY if your want to. You should not be forced into doing it. Guys who says that are not worth keeping.
1 person likes this
@lady1993 (27225)
• Philippines
28 Oct 11
That is good advice to everyone out there, and not just girls... A relationship in which the partner forces you to become something you are not is not a good relationship at all.
• Philippines
28 Oct 11
hi lady, This is a lame excuses really if he has a needs well I think they have two hands which can help them anyway . Even us lady has needs but we can live with or without it. Well boys always be boys happy mylotting
@lady1993 (27225)
• Philippines
28 Oct 11
That is another lame excuse for them- boys will be boys.. can't they fight their nature? If girls can, why can't they? We live as equals these days anyway. I really admire those guys who remain loyal to one girl.. amidst all the temptation around him.
• United States
29 Oct 11
Yeah this Guy sounds like a total PIG
• United States
29 Oct 11
No,I think that it's a leared behavor. It's nothing more then a copout.It's what they say when,they don't know what to say. It's just a way of covering thire behinds, and trying to make you feel guilty for not giving them what they need. I don't beleave that there is ever a good reason for cheating.It's wrong know matter how many reasons that they can give you.
@Mashnn (4501)
29 Oct 11
Most guys will always lie when caught and give fake excuses, it is way of escaping the consequences. You should always be ready and smart on how to handle them.
@betlynfrnds (4060)
• United States
28 Oct 11
I hate it too. It's just a stupid excuse to be lazy and irresponsible. I think what a guy like this really needs is more maturity. They need to grow up and learn how to treat people with dignity and respect. It's a shame that so many people don't even know what these 2 words mean.
@Rick1950 (1575)
• Lima, Peru
28 Oct 11
I think there is no reason to justify infidelity. Although anyone can fall into infidelity we should try not to be unfair. We are living in a fight between the flesh and spirit, but again infidelity is not justifiable.