is it important that the education gap between you and your parner in marrige?

@mandylee (267)
China
November 5, 2011 11:29am CST
we expect a harmonious relationship in marrige.when you are going to walk into the marrige,do you care about the difference of education between you and your parner?i mean the gap is very large not little
3 people like this
14 responses
5 Nov 11
That's an interesting question. Personally, I don't care about the education level of my partner. However (and it's a pretty big "However"!), I DO care about their intelligence level. I don't mean I give them an IQ test or want them to be incredibly smart or anything but if they aren't interested in learning, in exchanging opinions, in all kinds of subjects both mutual and individual then I'm not interested. I really couldn't live with someone stupid.
@almond24 (1250)
• Hungary
5 Nov 11
Haha, iuliuxd, i think you are hitting the nail on the head! I guess it doesn't stand for everyone, but important if we look at the age when people usually get married. Intelligence does count at the first impression, but emotional intelligence and proper communication seems to be more important than IQ in my opinion.
1 person likes this
5 Nov 11
Let's be serious: the question said "you", not "everyone around you" - most of whom are, shall we say, limited in their world view. I can only speak for myself. I once knew a guy who'd married his wife purely because she was pretty: not only was he the most stupid, annoying, offensive, egotistical, (insert half a dozen other bad things here) person I've ever had the misfortune to run into, he was also extremely unhappily married. I don't care what anyone else wants or how important our society thinks physical beauty is: they're gonna get old and saggy anyway and I'd rather have the thing that's much sexier and lasts longer.
@mandylee (267)
• China
6 Nov 11
Hi,my friends,i think it is a hot topic!you had a lot of opinions about it after i left and keep going on....
@celticeagle (118210)
• Boise, Idaho
7 Nov 11
I think this could really be a problem. If there is a large gap what do they really have in common? What will they talk about? It can really be boring for the one with the better education. And it could mean that arguments could be harder on the relationship also. It could really be a hard gap to fill.
@mandylee (267)
• China
2 Dec 11
yes,you're right.celticeagle.we are the same.maybe there are more arguments or cold war between the relationship,because the gap is hard to fill.thank you so much!
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (118210)
• Boise, Idaho
3 Dec 11
THat could very well be.
• Philippines
5 Nov 11
i don't personally prefer education gap in a relationship nor in marriage. to me, it doesn't matter if my partner is as intelligent as Einstein or something like that. to me, what matters most is how we are having the mutual understanding of each other. as long as it doesn't affects our relationship and the decisions we make for our relationship, it will be just as fine. in fact, my partner is not an educationally intelligent, i mean, when we were in college he does not do pretty well in academics unlike me who is in the dean's list always. BUT, there are a lot of times, that when we talk, or like when we're having a discussion and exchanging of opinions and ideas i could say that he's even smarter than i am. he's a sports minded type, a wide-reader, he watches a lot and my family like having conversations with him because he knew a lot. i even feel shameful sometimes because there are a lot of things he knew more than i do. haha. education could not be a serious thing for me. it may have been a factor but necessarily.
• Philippines
5 Nov 11
it may have been a factor but "NOT" necessarily. sorry... i missed the word.
@mandylee (267)
• China
7 Nov 11
i am glad to hear that you had a smart parner.i think the education gap between you is not much big,just a little,it does't the matter cause it cant infulence you exchanging of opinions and ideas
@bubuth (1816)
• Philippines
25 Mar 12
I think its not important as long as you love your partner and he have stable job. I also have an education gap in my partner but we just never mind about we think that its not so important, the much more important for us is we are helping each other in our every day need and every day task. I am also proud that my partner is so smart and so intelligent.
@mandylee (267)
• China
27 Mar 12
you are so lucky that you had a smart parner and you love each other,so the gap is not a problem
• Khaimah, United Arab Emirates
8 Nov 11
It's doesn't matter about the education gap. Although education could help, but not all people try to practice what they have learned from school. Intelligence is a must. If a person knows how to hold life intelligently, system, coordination and harmony will follow.
@mandylee (267)
• China
27 Mar 12
you're right!intelligence is a must.i think that he must smarter than me at least.thanks lot
@jillhill (37384)
• United States
7 Nov 11
Some people are educated by experience. NOt just what diploma they have. I think that is totally between the two involved in the relationship though I think at times it would have to cause some friction.
@mandylee (267)
• China
27 Mar 12
that's true.if the one is smart enough,he can learn everything from life and not just depending on diploma.thank you so much
• Mexico
7 Nov 11
Hi mandy lee: For some persons this doesn't count too much but for me the answer is yes because this makes us have more things in common. I would love that my partner would be as educated as me so we can talk about the same things and she can speak properly. I would not like make a person with no education feel stupid if she is talking with me. It's very important to have something to talk to the person you chose because this makes love grows deeper and have the same educational level can be really helpful. ALVARO
@mandylee (267)
• China
2 Dec 11
thank you for your good advice.it's importance to have things in common in a relationship,so the pairs can talk freely.
@jaiho2009 (39019)
• Philippines
6 Nov 11
Education doesn't mean that my partner should be professional and is holding a managerial position. I don't look into that aspect much. As long as he is not stupid it's fine with me. I like someone who I can talk to with different subjects.
@mandylee (267)
• China
6 Nov 11
yes,you are right.we don't need a professor,we just need a lover whom we can talk to with some topic which we're intersted
@hexebella (1140)
• Philippines
6 Nov 11
I need someone who have the same level of education, intelligence and mentality as mine. For me it matters most in a marriage relationship. My partner's way of thinking would affect the relationship very much. I wouldn't enjoy living with someone whom I can not engage in a good conversation.
@mandylee (267)
• China
6 Nov 11
i agree with you.if the pairs have the same level of education,they can communicate well and make the life more colorful!thank you so much
• Philippines
5 Nov 11
I saw this as an initial barricade but once you've settled it then the journey should be alright. Both I and my husbunny value education. I think we have established a mutual respect and admiration for each other because what he lacks in educational units, I fill in and what I lack in wisdom and experience, he fills in.
@mandylee (267)
• China
15 Nov 11
i'm glad to hear that you have a perfect relationship!i hope i can do like you.thanks
@WakeUpKitty (8707)
• Netherlands
5 Nov 11
An education gap can be a very big problem. So it depends on the kind of gap. There are different kinds of for example: not able/used to communicate, show feeling, to read, never learned to find a solution for problems, not able to count. Some educations gaps are no problem at all (not speaking a language or not knowing all about history or astrology). You can talk about other subjects or go look for the right info. Most important in a relationship is of you are able to understand eachother. If you are able to understand what is bothering your partner of keeping him/her busy. Also you can educate yourself if you are willing to open up your eyes and ears, are able to observe and know how to read.
@mandylee (267)
• China
15 Nov 11
yes,you're right.the most important is to understand each other and the education gap is not a big problem.thank you for your advice
@curmont (343)
• United States
5 Nov 11
I don't care about their education, the only thing that matters is how they make me feel and not just in the bed either. I have an ex that could make me speak in tongues in the bed but was a real jerk outside of the bed and had a terrible habit of putting me down and making me feel small. I wouldn't care who or what the person was if they can manage to make me feel like a queen everyday for the rest of my life then screw everything else I will gladly spend my life with them
@mandylee (267)
• China
7 Nov 11
maybe you're right,if you love someone deeply,you don't care about his education.you will think he is a perfect man including his defect!thank you
@fantabulus (4005)
• India
1 Nov 12
Yes education is important between partners. Because if wife is more educated then husband feeling frustrated. I observe only Dr. man married with Dr. women but in other case women are less educated than husband.
@wolfie34 (26793)
• United Kingdom
1 Nov 12
Just because someone has qualifications doesn't mean they are qualified in the ways of life, experience is just as valuable. Education matters not to me, and that would never be a deciding factor as to whether my partner is more educated than me. If you are truly in love with someone, education gap shouldn't be a factor, and despite they are educated, they may only be educated in particular subjects, like an accountant would be good with figures, accounts etc, but may be no good at fixing cars, but someone who can fix cars is educated in that field but no good at numbers and accounts! We can't be educated in everything in life.