Aside from communication, how can one maintain a long distance relationship?

@rencarl (620)
Philippines
November 5, 2011 3:15pm CST
I am wondering if communication is the only key to a successful long distance relationship.it has been 10 months since we have been miles apart with my girlfriend.she is now living in london and i am staying here in the philippines.we have been constantly communicating since then. but i am still wondering if indeed we have made the correct moves to stay as loving as love birds as before?any thoughts?
14 responses
@saphrina (31740)
• South Africa
6 Nov 11
Having such a relationship is hard sweetie. It takes a lot of communication, trust, respect and love. All you can really do is communicate each and every day till you are lucky enough to be together. Good Luck and i honestly hope you both will be happy.
@rencarl (620)
• Philippines
7 Nov 11
hello there my friend. you know what? i smiled when you said "All you can really do is communicate each and every day till you are lucky enough to be together". sure i will. i am glad i got to hear that statement from you. thank you so much for such a wonderful comment. i really appreciate it.
@saphrina (31740)
• South Africa
7 Nov 11
My pleasure sweetie. You owe me a cookie, though.
@se7enthbird (8328)
• Philippines
5 Nov 11
i will soon be leaving to work abroad and i will leave my wife and our son here in the Philippines. this is not the first time but i can say that commmunication is one of the important things you have to maintain a long distance relationship. trust is one more thing, understanding for you both because the time there at London has a big difference here in the Philippines... my brother lives there. but the most important thing is love. this all wont work out if the love is no longer there. 10 months is like years already when you are apart to the person you love... but you need to hang on tight to make it work. good luck.
@rencarl (620)
• Philippines
7 Nov 11
Thank you so much for commenting my friend. it is indeed true that being 10 months away is like years already when you are apart from the person you love. missing someone who has been with you for a long time is not an easy feeling to carry. like me, i can't stop thinking of her even when i am just simply having a meal or just having my haircut. it is like you are missing half of your life when your love one is not beside you.Good luck to you too my friend.
• Philippines
7 Nov 11
i can relay... when you said that you can not stop thinking of her even on just simple events like eating or having a hair cut. that is how i feel too when me and my wife are apart. it is more difficult on my side for we also have a son. when he is sick i can not sleep. even i done this over and over still it is hard to adjust.
@kaeirole (669)
• Philippines
6 Nov 11
long distance relationship is really hard..i think, aside from communication, i believe you both have built a good foundation in your relationship while she's still here in the philippines..if yes, then there's a greater chance for your relationship to work..just continue the love, trust and patience because of time difference..and of course, constant communication..and since your the guy, always make your girl feel that she's loved..do things that would keep the fire burning..
@rencarl (620)
• Philippines
7 Nov 11
"Keep the fire burning". those words are so meaningful to hear. this is what i think i should do then because even how frequent we communicate if i seem to be cold and passive, our relationship will just get tired enduring the distance and time difference. you are very correct when you said that we both have built a good foundation in our relationship while she's still here in the philippines. this is something that i can boast for because i know in my self that we made the best memories together when she was still here. not to mention also my sweetness and caring attitude. well, you are another person in mylot that i feel i have to pay so much gratitude for the morale boosting words you said...thank you so much my friend.
@ferbjohn69 (1129)
• Philippines
6 Nov 11
Even if there is communiction but there is no trust,relationship won't last. You should trust your partner so your relationship will be strong even if you are apart. Trust your partner.:)
@rencarl (620)
• Philippines
7 Nov 11
thank you for your comment my friend. it is still easier said than done though. trusting someone is a lot harder to do than you think it is but for the sake of love to last, i know i have to trust her.anyway, thank you for dropping by...
@jaiho2009 (39034)
• Philippines
6 Nov 11
Aside from communication, trust is one of the main ingredient to keep a relationship lasting. Without trust love will never survive. Jealousy is fine, it's a good feeling to feel it and sign that you love each other. But of course, constant communication is a must.
@rencarl (620)
• Philippines
7 Nov 11
hello there my friend. thank you so much for commenting. communication and trust will always be the factors for a long distance relationship to last. these are the words i hear almost all the time that is why they have not surprised me anymore. what i was surprised was the word 'jealousy' you said. i kinda laughed it out because i am the kind of person who gets jealous easily,haha. no worries my friend. i was just amused. well, thank you so much once again.
@Aja103654 (5658)
• Philippines
6 Nov 11
long distance relationships are tough... my thoughts? I honestly don't want to have that kind of relationship. I'd avoid it as much as possible.
@rencarl (620)
• Philippines
7 Nov 11
hello there my friend.thank you for your comment. if you believe in fate, what if fate will play on you and in a snap of a finger you will be facing a relationship that is in no way cannot be stopped to become a long distance relationship?as you said, you will avoid it as much as possible.then how? i hope to hear from you my friend.
@vexxus (708)
• Philippines
6 Nov 11
10 months is a very long period of time, patience, as long as you keep holding on to your words to each other, there would be no problem with that, i also had a friend whose also involve in long distance relationship, last month her boyfriend had a one month vacation leave so they had the chance to mesmerize and relive they relationship intimacy, she was so happy and even excited when she told me that, i can see a spark in her eyes. i wonder how much love she felt the time she saw her beloved boyfriend again, now they are engaged. i hope such sweet love story can also happen to you my friend.
@rencarl (620)
• Philippines
7 Nov 11
thank you for your response my friend. i thank you also for wishing me a good ending for my love story. i am thinking that maybe when my girlfriend flies back home here in the philippines, we can tie the knot and we can together migrate to london for good. sounds good,isn't it?well, only time will tell. thank you once again for dropping by my friend.
@bb_gabs (205)
• Philippines
6 Nov 11
We are on the same situation now, me and my husband are also in a long distance relationship for three years now, communication is very important in a relationship, but communication alone is not enough, any plans going to london for your girlfriend?? I think it will be very good if you will go there also.
@rencarl (620)
• Philippines
7 Nov 11
I am glad someone in mylot share the same experience as i have. we are in the same page my friend.well, thank you so much for your comment. i do have plans of going to london.the earliest is next year, 2012. however, the longer it takes for me to go there, the longer also the time that i have to endure just to survive this long distance relationship. 10 months for me is already a punishment. how much more pain will more days and months give me? well, i am delighted that you have endured the long 3 years of being away with your other half. i salute persons like you for being so strong emotionally.
@bubuth (1816)
• Philippines
5 Nov 11
communication in a relationship is very important but don't forget about the trust..trust is essential element of a relationship and when it missing anxiety and suspicion will rapidly take over..For me trust and communication is very important in relationship specially in long distance relation..
@rencarl (620)
• Philippines
7 Nov 11
thank you so much for your comment my friend.trust and communication are words that has become cliche's in the world of long distance relationships. it is easy to say these words yet they are very difficult to do.but anyway, thank you so much for commenting my friend.
• United States
5 Nov 11
YOu have to make sure you find the time to see one another. Touch is very important in a relationship. Being alone all the time and having time to spare gives up time to wonder and think too much. Often times it leaves people room to find others to take that lonely place. YOu fly to her or she has to fly to you. I lived this way for a year. we both flew back and forth. One day he could not take it anymore and we broke up but,only after he slept with his ex..
@rencarl (620)
• Philippines
7 Nov 11
thank you for dropping by my friend. i really do appreciate your comment. your statement "Being alone all the time and having time to spare gives up time to wonder and think too much" really put me in the driver seat because I can relate to what you are saying. I am afraid to lose my patience of enduring this long distance relationship because as what you said, being alone gives me more time to wonder and think too much. i don't want that to happen that is why i am so eager to fly to london but the problem is that i don't have yet the financial capacity to do one. i hope i can figure it out soon on solving this concern. anyway, thank you again for such a meaningful comment.
• United States
5 Nov 11
I'm in a long-distance relationship with my girlfriend right now, and communication is the most important thing. We get to see each other usually once every three weeks, and having that is also very important. The quality of the relationship, in my opinion, goes up when couples are in a long-distance relationship. They don't see as many flaws in each other's lives because they don't have to see the mundane activities of day-to-day life, communication is typically better, and when they do see each other, the physical connection is more special because it's less often.
@rencarl (620)
• Philippines
7 Nov 11
thank you for commenting my friend.i hope i am getting your point correctly.do you mean that one of the key ingredients of a successful relationship is having moments that you are apart from each other? are you pointing out that love grows more if you don't get to see your love one more often?
@nerein (283)
• United States
5 Nov 11
Now communication is the biggest key into having a long distance relationship. One thing that you might try if you have the chance is to physically see each other. Other things that you can do is send each other gifts as well. The main thing that you need to do though is communicate. That is how most long distance relationships end up failing. Lack of communication which is something that is needed if you want a long distance relationship to last long.
@rencarl (620)
• Philippines
7 Nov 11
I see your point my friend. communication is still the major factor in a long distance relationship but I have to agree more with your suggestion that I have to see her personally.nothing can be more satisfying than to be with your loved one together. thank you for commenting nerein. i hope to see more comments from you in some of mylot's posted discussions.
@WakeUpKitty (8709)
• Netherlands
5 Nov 11
Can't you feel you love eachother? Don't you feel in love? It is that what counts, the feelings you have both inside. It has nothing to do with a daily communication, too much communication can ruin a relationship as well. Esp. if you have the feeling this is the only thing you can do to stay close. There are so many ways you can show you miss eachother or love eachother. This will be showned the best unexpectedly. Also.. the longer you are together the more love is developping. Being in love is something different, but it doesn't mean there will be periods you have those butterflies again also in a long, steady relationship.
@rencarl (620)
• Philippines
6 Nov 11
hello my friend. let me answer your question "can't you feel you love each other?". of course we do feel that we love each other. as a matter of fact, we badly miss each other that we cry together even in front of a video call. we reciprocate each others' feelings.for example,when the other one is angry, the other one just keeps quiet. that is how i value her so much. thank you for commenting my friend.
@bubuth (1816)
• Philippines
25 Mar 12
I agree that communication is one of the thing to maintain a long distance relationship but communication alone is not enough. The couple or partner also need trust to one other so your relationship will be still the same. The best thing for me in a long distance relationship is after a long time not seeing each other. You will feel super happy when you see each other again and you will feel the happiness that you never feel before.