Are you on the road to 'Becoming Grumpy'?

Becoming grumpy as you get older - becoming a grumpy old man
@bounce58 (17524)
Canada
November 7, 2011 2:58pm CST
I think that the older I get, the more sensitive I become. I can't seem to stand too much noise, to much complications, too much emotional outbursts from other people, too much loosing from my favorite team, too much cold (and hot) weather, too much physical exertion, and too many financial problems, etc. And I was thinking about this last night, I came to the realization that I am on the road to becoming a grumpy old man! I can't have that! I wonder how I can get off. Have you found yourself becoming more sensitive as you get older? Are there things that you did when you were young that you can't seem to stand nowadays? Do you see yourself becoming grumpy in the future? How do you get off?
7 people like this
20 responses
@bostonphil (4420)
• United States
7 Nov 11
I am 66 years old and I have gotten grumpier. I have been fully aware of it. I am having difficulty with noise, extreme weather, stress at work, my relationships with others etc. etc. etc. I am much more cranky than when I was young or even younger. I think you said it right when you said something about being more sensitive to things around me. I am not certain that you can get off of it. It may be part of the aging factor. I spend more and more time at home alone working or playing on my computer, sometimes while listening to TV. This is when I am most peaceful and happiest now. When I was younger, I always wanted to go out and do things. Now I want to be home. It is said that "to everything there is a season" and maybe I am now in the season of being a senior citizen.
2 people like this
@capirani (1841)
• United States
8 Nov 11
Maybe it would do each of us good to review which season we are each in. I agree. I am certainly in a season of some kind. But when we are talking about seasons, we can be glad that if we are in a season we don't exactly like, seasons do pass and change into other seasons we like better. If we are in a season we do like, I guess we better do what we can to enjoy each and every minute of it while it lasts.
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Nov 11
I love life. I enjoy life. Nevertheless, I have gotten crankier and grumpier with age. I am still sociable and pleasant but things bother me more. And I spend more time in solitude because this is when I am most peaceful. I live in senior citizen housing and most of my neighbors are cranky and grumpy. They are crankier and grumpier than me. I thin k it is something that comes with aging.
• United States
8 Nov 11
I love life. I enjoy life. Nevertheless, I have gotten crankier and grumpier with age. I am still sociable and pleasant but things bother me more. And I spend more time in solitude because this is when I am most peaceful. I live in senior citizen housing and most of my neighbors are cranky and grumpy. They are crankier and grumpier than me. I think it is something that comes with aging.
@timetravel (1428)
• United States
8 Nov 11
I have noticed the same with my husband in recent years - he is 78 - 23 years older than I am. About a year ago I found myself telling him he was becoming one of those "grumpy old men" to which he shouted, "I am not, d***it!". Seriously, though, he is and I think it's simply more of a sensitivity as one gets older. You lose your hearing, you don't remember things as well (short term memory loss is common in the elderly), things take longer, you don't move as easily as you once did - and as you realize you don't have all the time in the world your patience for certain things begins to wear thin. At 55, I can see myself getting more irritable with stuff that never used to bother me.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
13 Nov 11
I haven't experienced those things yet, I think. Although I'm definitely not as agile as when I was younger, but I think I still move quick. I think I still hear well, and I still have good memory. Yet, inspite of all these, I think I'm getting grumpy already. What more if I start losing these things? Then I would really be a grumpy old man. Thanks.
• United States
13 Nov 11
You're welcome. By the way, did you ever watch the movie Grumpy Old Men?
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
14 Nov 11
Yes I did! And I liked that a little love story can make them a little less grumpy.
@LittleMel (14055)
• Canada
7 Nov 11
some of these things I am already sensitive at LOL e.g. too much drama and too hot/too cold weather or food/drink other than that I find myself calmer, more reflective and less aggressive, not so easily influenced by negativity outside and not rushing into things I know that there is reason behind each and single thing happening I just don't always know it right away even in my own life, delays and failures actually work to my advantage I just don't see this right away in my case it's spiritual practice that helps me deal with many things I've worked on it since 2009 after leaving my religion I don't know how other people deal with it though
2 people like this
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
9 Nov 11
Hi LittleMel. Although a bit sensitive, which others may call 'being grumpy', I think what you've found is wisdom. Specially the part where you don't get yourself influenced by 'negativity'. Thanks.
@_sketch_ (5709)
• United States
7 Nov 11
If you would choose to accept rather than reject what's going on, then things wouldn't seem annoying to you. I am finding myself becoming more at peace. If you can't change the way things are, then just try to enjoy it. Whatever is in the current moment is all we have; it is our life, so we should not let our attitudes ruin it for us and make us miss out on the fun of our life. No, I do not see myself becoming grumpy in the future. My aim is in the other direction.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (164465)
• Garden Grove, California
7 Nov 11
hi sketch in other words don't stress the small things and most things are small if one just thinks about it. a smile is a frown turned upside down.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
8 Nov 11
Hello sketch. I wish I could get to that place. I think I'm still on beginning stage of the 'grumpy road', where everything still annoys me. I think somewhere down the road, I would start accepting everything. And as Hatley suggests, not stres the small things. Thanks.
@_sketch_ (5709)
• United States
8 Nov 11
Well not even just the small things, but anything that we cannot change.
@Hatley (164465)
• Garden Grove, California
7 Nov 11
hi well I am becoming a grumpy o ld woman as I am nearing 85 by Nov. 15th and I looked in the mirror I have frown lines where I used to have laugh lines. lost the laughter when i was widowed many years back regained it only to get evicted and made homeless and have to suffer the harshness of being forced to live here where I would never have come voluntarily. but now am looking in the mirror as I fix up for the day and making myself smile and grin too. look at yourself , frown then smile oh my the difference. greet people with a smile.and find some something to laugh at every day even if its only yourself. I am sensitive too b ut have always been that way a bit.I have yet to find out why they call old age with all its pains and aches and low budget the golden age? yhou have to retire, you now do not see the people you worked with. but show me some gold and I will laugh too.
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Nov 11
I think that it is wonderful that you are 85 and on line! Plus you are getting around and articulate. You seem to have a good attitude. I am 66 and hanging in there.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
9 Nov 11
Hey Hatley. I think if you can find something to smile about everyday, and you can greet everyone you meet with a smile, then there is no need to be grumpy. And if I too see some gold, I would have a big smile too! bostonphil, you're still very young!
@Bluedoll (17050)
• Canada
7 Nov 11
I was watching this documentary one night (don’t worry about it) about this old guy that gave out a flower everyday (don’t worry about it) to anyone passing by, well the females mostly (don’t worry about it) and one young guy gave him this dirty look but he said to him don’t worry about it. They asked him why he did this everyday and he said he had a hard life (don’t worry about it) but wanted to do something getting to the end of it (don’t worry about it). When he was asked what advice he could give to the camera audience about stress, he just took a slow breath and said well, I would say, don’t worry about it. – true
1 person likes this
@Hatley (164465)
• Garden Grove, California
7 Nov 11
okay lost all entire comment I was remembering an old series with a dwarf calling the plane, he plane and ricardo montalban running a hotel.each day one of the staff would run to him with a bad problem and he wou ld solve and say laugh, be happy. then one day the cook ran in 'All our dishes are broke what am I going to do?His classic answer laugh be happy serve the food on banana leaves.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
9 Nov 11
Hello Bluedoll. I haven't seen that documentary (not worrying about it), and I haven't really seen any old man like that (not worrying about it), who just does wonderful things for people around (not worrying about it). The old men I encounter are mostly grumpy (not worrying about it). It would be great though if I don't turn out just like them (not worrying about it). Thanks! Hi Hatley. I've actually eaten on banana leaves, and it's great!
• United States
11 Nov 11
I think we just get tired of all the "crap" when we get older, and yes, that stuff makes us grumpy! For me, I find I have no patience with others being ignorant, lazy, and so forth. As I get older I have become more apt to take a stand or position on something, and would definitely come across as "grumpy" to some when I state my point of view.
1 person likes this
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
14 Nov 11
I think you've hit the nail on the head! I think that we lose patience on what some people do, and it does come out as being grumpy sometimes. I also think it shows a lack of respect at where we are in our lives when people make us grumpy. I think. Thanks.
@cynthiann (18619)
• Jamaica
9 Nov 11
No I do not think that I have become grumpy. I think that you are probably suffering from stress and need a break Bounce. Can you plan for a weekend away with your wife and someone look after your son? You need a little break and need a little fun. I do hope that you will get it
1 person likes this
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
14 Nov 11
Actually, this weekend was a long one. And I was hoping to de-stress myself. Unfortunately, I have been sick. I have a lingering cough and cold, so it hasn't been a restful one. I hope to get better, and maybe get that break. Thanks.
1 person likes this
@Opal26 (17690)
• United States
8 Nov 11
Hi my dearest bro! Don't worry, you're not alone! I hate to admit it, but I was a real beotch when I was young. And now I can't tolerate alot of the things I probably could have when I was a "younger woman". I get annoyed about things like waiting in line, people on cell phones EVERYWHERE talking loudly, not getting a seat on the bus, just to name a few~ As we get older, I'm afraid we do get a bit "grumpier". At least I know I have! I still like to "blast" my music though! So, not all things change!
1 person likes this
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
13 Nov 11
Hey sis! I do hate people who talk on their celphones loudly. And it always seem to be at the most inappropriate places. It's like we're being drag into their conversations, it's annoying. I already hate that now, what more in a few years?! Then I'd really be that grumpy old man! Thanks.
@hvedra (1623)
8 Nov 11
Oh yes, that sounds like me all right! I think it is an age thing, you get to a certain point in life and you become less tolerant of the things that upset you. Perhaps it is because we were told "when you are older you can do as you please but while you live in this house..." when we were kids. Well, we are older and live in our own homes but, guess what, we still can't do as we please! No wonder we are grumpy.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
13 Nov 11
So very true! I think when we've had some responsibilities, we start expecting a few things. And think that we're entitled to a few indulgences. And then when people around us don't respect it, and crimp our 'style', that's when we get grumpy. Thanks.
1 person likes this
@capirani (1841)
• United States
7 Nov 11
I guess this makes me becoming a grumpy old woman. LOL I have found that since the kids have moved out and I am a grandmother now, I have more peace and quiet in my home. I don't even watch the television as much as I used to as I find I prefer the quiet. However I do enjoy having a good time, having the grandkids come visit and playing with them, listening to their laughter. But when I've had enough, I do find myself ready for everyone to go back to their own homes and leave me to my quiet place. Yes, I agree also about the extremes in weather, stressful situations, and all kinds of things that change what feels normal. At the same time, I do not want to be stuck this way so I make sure that I do find ways to include some activities in my life to help me feel alive and well even if my body doesn't always agree. Music is something that helps me feel better when I find myself getting too grumpy. I also love to cook, although I cook for myself alone most of the time and that is not so much fun. I do like to try new recipes, though and that is fun, especially once I get them "perfected" and can try them on my kids. I find I have to force myself many times to make the effort to do something to keep me from getting into a rut and becoming too bored which leads me to being more grumpy. Last week I set up a jigsaw puzzle I had been procrastinating about for a long long time. Now I make sure to work on that at least once a day with a minimum of putting 5 pieces in at each sitting. It's a hard 1000 piece puzzle. One thing I have found is that if I don't do for myself to find ways to dig myself out of the doldrums, nobody else is going to do it for me. At the same time, I make sure I do keep enough of the quiet peaceful times in each day because now that I am older, I appreciate this quiet so much more than when I was young.
1 person likes this
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
7 Nov 11
I hear you! Lucky you that your children have moved out. My kids are still young, and it's still going to be a while before I could really appreciate 'quiet' time. Nowadays, I sometimes get annoyed when they bicker. I know I love them and all, but sometimes I'm glad I'm at work, or they're at school! Then I could have a quiet time for myself and practice being grumpy! Thanks.
1 person likes this
@saphrina (31739)
• South Africa
8 Nov 11
Hi sweetie. Well, i never liked any kind of noises as i have extremely sensitive hearing. I have trouble with hot and cold weather. Does that make me grumpy then? Nope, get yourself a nice outfit and come visit me, i'll get you out of that mood very quickly.
@saphrina (31739)
• South Africa
11 Nov 11
Nope, blue berry muffins.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
12 Nov 11
Not really sure what kind of outfit that would put me in the right mood, or be deemed fun (or at least, appropriate). But I do love muffins. I haven't tried blue berry ones in a while.
@saphrina (31739)
• South Africa
12 Nov 11
Which ever way. I am not sharing mine.
• United States
8 Nov 11
No , I was born super sensitive. I was taught all emotions were not to be shown so whenever I did , I thought I was evil. Nowadays i have less of my hair trigger temper but I'm still as sensitive as I was . The thing that Has changed is I'm not surprised or hurt when the Redskins lose. Back in the day I would be so hurt. It would feel like I was kicked in the stomach. But today I'm still upset with the "coach". In fact each lost feels good . It helps my Giants! The one thing I don't do is blast my music. I don't have to. I'm not always pi$$ed off! Ok Enough about me. How dare you insult my friend like this? you are not a grumpy old man! Being sensitive is ok. Not liking loud music Does not make you an old Anything. so Stop demeaning my friend in my presence!
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
11 Nov 11
Haha!
1 person likes this
@SIMPLYD (85041)
• Philippines
8 Nov 11
Oh , i don't want to be a grumpy old woman in the future. So as much as possible, i always look at things in a positive way. I always want the company of happy people. I treat problems as part of life and are challenges. One challenge done is a triumph to me. In fact, i would always tell my husband when he seems stressed and grumpy "hey, would you like to be an old grumpy man?" , and that will waken him up and he will take away the bad mood and grumpy attitude. He would tickle me and we will be in a lighter mood.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
11 Nov 11
It's nice to know that you always have someone beside you who could always remind you not to be grumpy. And it's great that you go about it like children too! I think that would strengthen your relationship and ensure that none of you become grumpy in the future. Thanks.
@SIMPLYD (85041)
• Philippines
14 Nov 11
Oh, we have to do that, because no one wants to live with a grumpy partner.
@enelym001 (8333)
• Philippines
8 Nov 11
Yes I think I would be grumpy too when I became an old lady.. but that's if there's no one to cheer me up and make me feel happy about life. If I will be surrounded with difficulties and people who disappoints me than make me feel comfortable then more likely I will end up being grumpy too but i don't wish to become like one.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
10 Nov 11
So I guess you know what your objective in life enelym001! To collect and surround yourself with people that constantly cheer you up. And you should have lots around before you get old-er. Lest you become grumpy. Thanks.
@enelym001 (8333)
• Philippines
11 Nov 11
I hope... and I worry about not having anyone when I get older
@katsmeow1213 (29044)
• United States
8 Nov 11
"ON the road"? No.. I've already travelled the road and I am currently residing in grumpy land. Some days I take little mini vacations, but for the most part I am firmly planted in grumpy land. I think it's all a part of becoming an adult.. but some people grow up faster than others. Sadly I started growing up when I was still very very young so I had a head start on my road to grumpy land.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
10 Nov 11
I guess that experience on Subway, and how things ended there didn't help you in getting out of grumpy land! I am the eldest of three, and I've always thought that I had to grow up very very young too. And maybe that's one of the reason I'm off to grumpy land. Thanks.
• United States
10 Nov 11
I am also the oldest of 3, but my siblings are so much younger than me that they didn't really affect how I grew up, besides I only spent half of my time at home and the other half of my childhood I lived with my "Nana" where I was basically an only child. What made me grow up so fast was the fact that I had my first child at such a young age.
@francesca5 (1344)
13 Nov 11
i think, possibly, as we get older we are more prone to stress. and maybe things that didn't stress us before now do. if you really wanted to not turn into a grumpy old man it might be worth looking at maybe what is making you grumpy and seeing if there are any underlying reasons that you can sort out. i have the advantage of living alone, and can be grumpy when i'm alone, and cheerful when i go out and meet people. however when i was married to my ex husband he was a very critical man and that was very difficult and so i have had to deal with the issues that his behaviour raised for me, and that is a good way of becoming more content, as i now either avoid highly critical people, or understand that they are the ones with a problem. what i am trying to say is there may be something in your life that is making you grumpy and you could deal with it.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
15 Nov 11
So very true! I think that people that are close to us are definitely contributing factors to being grumpy. As evidenced by your example, which could also ring true with my situation. I could also see myself living alone, and would definitely be less grumpy. Thanks.
@joystick (1680)
13 Nov 11
I have seen people the same age as me getting really grumpy, but this i think is due to age.I have noticed people being more selfish now, as well as treating other people like dirt and i think that those are the two things that get me angry and the more of what i see and hear the worse my temper gets.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
15 Nov 11
I also think that even if it's not all, there are some people who have definitely turned their attitude towards other people into a not-so-good-way. I think it's the combination of how hard life is, and resources not readily available to everyone that make other people rude. And this I think contribute in make some older folks grumpier. Thanks joystick!
@GardenGerty (104414)
• United States
11 Nov 11
I am already grumpy, at least at times, and I need to take the road back the other way. For me that involves eating well, getting enough sleep and having activities outside of my home that stimulate me to think and to socialize.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
14 Nov 11
I think there comes a certain point in our lives that we come to expect a few things. Not that we selfishly want it, but we think that we deserve it, because of our stature. And then if we don't get it, then that's our excuse to be grumpy (even if other people don't understand it). Thanks GG.
1 person likes this
@JenInTN (27564)
• United States
7 Nov 11
I realize alot more now about things than what I did when I was younger. There have been a ton of times when I have threatened to have a walking stick for things besides walking I think would make wonderful whapping someone back into realty methods. I think that I will have my times of grumpiness but I don't think I will be like that all the time. I am actually a little more laid back now than when I was younger.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
7 Nov 11
I think if we can just control, or at least limit these times of 'grumpiness', it wouldn't be that bad. If we can be laid back, and not mind the little things, then it would be a lot easier. Thanks Jen!