Someone switched my child over night

@savypat (20216)
United States
December 4, 2011 12:50pm CST
The girl turned 5 today. I know that in the night someone came and switched my sweet little girl for another one. At five this girl is no longer mine, first she dressed herself, didn't even ask me for advice, she combed her hair, brushed her teeth and then told me she was old enough to walk to school by herself. What changed? Somehow without my help she set goals for being 5, how did she learn to do that? Does she even need her Mom anymore? If she has done all this now, what will happen when she's 12 or 14 how can I ever keep up. Does any of this sound familiar to you? What will you do? I'll tell you what I did, I said a small prayer of thanks and said I'd make her lunch, went in the kitchen and poured a second cup of coffee. This was my 3rd child and I'd been through it before, the surprise was it took her so long. Happy parenting to all.
4 people like this
21 responses
@WakeUpKitty (8694)
• Netherlands
4 Dec 11
Don't worry.. she will always need you. My eldest already told me as she was 2.5 years old she was going for a long walk alone..happy parenting to you too
2 people like this
@GardenGerty (157545)
• United States
4 Dec 11
I remember at 2.5 or about that, I told my oldest son he was a "big boy" as he had done something very accomplished. (I do not remember what.) He looked at me and said, "May I borrow the car tomorrow?" We had a long conversation discussing just when he would be able to borrow the car. He is still a delight, and he is 35.
1 person likes this
@jdyrj777 (6530)
• United States
6 Dec 11
The part about walking to school sounds scarry. In this day and age i wonder if its safe for anyone to walk anywhere alone.
1 person likes this
@savypat (20216)
• United States
6 Dec 11
Not to worry just because she felt she was ready no way would I allow any child to walk to school or anywhere else alone.
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
9 Dec 11
This happened this year with my son. He turned five years old just about two months ago and all of a sudden, he really isn't my baby anymore. He won't let me give him the kisses that I used to give to him and I have a hard time getting him to let me help him take a bath and things like that. He is my youngest as well and having him be so independent is killing me because I am able to recognize the fact that one era of my parenting is changing.
1 person likes this
@inertia4 (27961)
• United States
7 Dec 11
That is something, really. My daughter, although independent also, will never turn around and say she can walk to school on her own and do all those things without complaining first. But, I would never let her go to school on her own. Not with the way kids are getting kidnapped and all. But, she seems like she went from 4 to 14 overnight.
1 person likes this
@globaldoc (858)
• Philippines
5 Dec 11
This is actually a stage. My kid somehow is into the same situation. Kids nowadays would want to grow up too quickly. At the end of the day, they get matured prematurely, and this is the reason why trouble is more rampant nowadays. They do not have enough time to really prepare for it. I wish my kid would take things slowly, and enjy time as he grows up with enough preparation for maturity.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
5 Dec 11
:) no matter how it may seem that a child does not need her mother anymore. they will always need their mother.
1 person likes this
@JenInTN (27514)
• United States
5 Dec 11
Sure does sound familiar to me..lol...they grow up so fast. One minute you are changing their diaper and then the next they are out the door.
1 person likes this
@marguicha (215345)
• Chile
5 Dec 11
Don´t you worry, friend. She will come back over the years any time she cannot cope. My daughters are 47 and 45, very independent and with their own life but they come to me when there´s a big problem. They know they can cry on mom´s shoulder and that I´ll cuddle them.
1 person likes this
@SIMPLYD (90722)
• Philippines
5 Dec 11
I felt the same too, when our daughter went to high school. She studied in another place where all scholars like her are in the their school compound. Suddenly, she's not asking me for help anymore with her studies. It's a good thing she still need our help for her laundry whenever when arrives home for the weekend. But now that she's a lady, she seemed not to need us anymore except for her allowance. Though, she would always request me to cook her favorites, whenever she come home for her school vacation, since she studies in a far city. Makes me excited for the coming school Christmas vacation.
1 person likes this
@r3jcorp (1382)
• Philippines
5 Dec 11
I don't know if it is something to do with your country that children are more independent, I respect it if that's the way the children now a days on your country. I have 2 daughters, one is 14years old and the youngest 9 years old. My eldest is more dependent to us than the little girl. Dependent as in she always wants us to be with her and seems to be happier inside our house than with her classmates. At 14 years old, we always bring her to school and fetch her too. But inside the school, she was very responsible and independent as she is the 4th Honor in her year level. My 9 years is old is the one who is really dependent. She can talk to anybody regarding her inquiries and she was named the Spokesperson of the Principal because at her age, she was tasked to relay information to other teachers and school staff. After school, she would go to the Principal's office to ask if they have practise in playing Angklong instrument and other things. The Principal thought she would be a great leader someday. At 5 years old, I think that age is too young to be independent. Going to school would be dangerous especially if she dont have a school bus. And if ever she has a school bus, could she carry her bag from school gate to her room? I understand that your school is not the same here. Here, the child would bring everyday all her books and notebooks to her room so if she has no parents accompanying her, she will carry it by herself. We don't have a locker for the children and there are books which were lost if left in the classroom.
1 person likes this
@airamtheb (370)
5 Dec 11
Congratulations for having such a cute little girl who is already declaring her initial "independence" from you. It goes to show that she is now trying to establish herself on the little things that she can accomplish. Let her be, because this is a very positive indication that your little girl will turn out alright when she grows older. Encourage her, even appreciate all that she wanted to do on her own. If ever she will get hurt along the way, this could also be her own learning process that not at all times that she could do on her own...and that she still needs her Mommy.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
5 Dec 11
I think that's only normal for your kid. As kids grow up, they learn to become independent. They want to do things by themselves. When this happens, the parents should just let the child do so but you should still continue to guide her in everything she will do. She still needs your guidance.
1 person likes this
@squallming (1775)
• Malaysia
5 Dec 11
Well, children grows very fast. Sometimes, depending on one's culture. In some Asian country, the girls would be very close and dependent to their mother even when they reach 20s. Some part of it is good because you get to be with your daughter and feel that they are around you all the time. The bad thing may be that she will not be able to be independent and survive and very competitive, less relationship based environment.
5 Dec 11
Don't worry, everything will be alright.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (157545)
• United States
4 Dec 11
Someone once said that the goal of successful parenting is to work your way out of a job by the time they turn 18. These are small steps on that big journey. Many of us have been there. Some of us did not realize it while we were there.
@patgalca (18179)
• Orangeville, Ontario
4 Dec 11
It brings to mind how people say about their kids, "I can hardly wait until she can walk." No, no, no. Enjoy them while they're small. I used to rock my baby to sleep. Once she could move around she would squirm right out of my arms. Now she's driving! So independent, but so mature and helpful as well. Never asks for money back when I ask her to pick something up at the store for me. My nieces and nephews have babies and at a recent gathering I sat and listened to them talking about their little tykes. My nephew stopped and looked at me and saw something in my face. He asked me if I wanted to have another baby. "I'm 49!" I exclaimed. He said, "But would you? Like if someone gave you a baby would you take it?" I didn't want to answer that question. I just said, "I'm missing when my kids were little." So enjoy your girl while she's five because one day she will be twenty-five and that day will come way too soon.
1 person likes this
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
4 Dec 11
THey grow up way to fast! But never outgrow their mama's! So don't worry. It just a step in being a bit more independent! She will still look like a baby when she is sleeping! Cherish those moments!
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Dec 11
I'm not a parent, but I do have a few nephews & a niece. I remember when they were being born, now they are all in school & pretty much grown up. It makes me sad when I think about just how fast they've grown. My nephew used to run & give me hugs, now he gets embarrassed if I try to hug him in public. If it feels like this when your only an Aunt I can just imagine how much worse it is when your a parent.
1 person likes this
@EavesJ (95)
• United States
4 Dec 11
My son is not a girl of course, but the same thing happened to me. I have 3 boys atm, 8,5 and 2 yr. old. At times it feels as if they are growing up too fast. Then at times you when they are crying and screaming, you start to think that its taking them for ever to grow up, and just want to pull out your hair. That's life for a parent, I guess. lol. What would I do? I would say "Good job!" "Can you buy your own car and pay for your collage too!?"
@ShyBear88 (59282)
• Sterling, Virginia
4 Dec 11
Stop relax this is normal all like kids go throw this. Just one day it hits them thy thy van do certain things with out you. Some things you can just say not old enough yet just a few more years and you can do this own your own. Getting up and getting dress is normal most 3 or 4 years crave for that and at 5 it is a good thing to let a child pick there clothes and dress themselves if what they are wearing is inapproroite that's when you tell then and ask them to change. Its a big step bit be happy celebrate her little indepenances from her mommy.
1 person likes this