Posing a question but not sharing own opinion/experiences

@secretbear (19472)
Philippines
December 7, 2011 9:23pm CST
Have you encountered a myLotter like this? Because I have and I really thought it was not okay for a discussion to be like that. The myLotter posed a question and then gave some situational background for it. It was like making you imagine that you're in that situation and then that myLotter posed the question. After that, he/she did not share his personal view or own experiences. I don't know if that myLotter shared his own answers in the comments to the responses but I think that upon posing the question, the author of the discussion should already share his/her own answers so that those who would respond can already read it without having to go through to the comments. So that there is already a basis for concurring or arguments. What do you think?
3 people like this
14 responses
@roberten (3134)
• United States
8 Dec 11
secretbear, I think sharing one's own view makes for a more lively conversation or debate. This is a quality that my posting lack at times and I am sure that yields fewer responses. Your formula makes good sense and good conversation.
@secretbear (19472)
• Philippines
9 Dec 11
Thank you very much.
@enelym001 (8333)
• Philippines
8 Dec 11
I have seen that kind of discussion. I think it's the one that keeps posting some one or two liners that are often like a phrase or thought where people who wants to give comments can only say the same thing as what he/she wrote. It's as if the discussion maker just wanted some opinion. Or wanted everyone to just agree or disagree with his/her thoughts about something but with no further thought to make the discussion lively or realistic.
2 people like this
@secretbear (19472)
• Philippines
9 Dec 11
It seems that way to me, too.
@Hatley (154622)
• Garden Grove, California
8 Dec 11
but secretbear but surely that has to be part of the whole discussion in that in a question also has to have a background as to why it is asked so would not the opinion and experiences of the discussion maker come into play in just stating his or her discussion . I mean who would just ask a question without some reason to do so and some framework to build around it first so your opinions and experiencesa would be stated before any question is asked.to begin wi th if a person makes a two sentence question as a discu ssion its going to get deleted. the discussion must have substance for us to discuss it wi th the discussion maker. I always state my opinons and my views before I ask for mylotters take on it.
2 people like this
@secretbear (19472)
• Philippines
9 Dec 11
As I've said, the situation is given and something like "what would you have done" would be asked but what could he/she have done is not given. If the reason why the situation has been brought up, then I would not react like I did. It kinda just get me into a state where I wonder "so do you or do you not" something.
@MsTickle (24752)
• Australia
18 Dec 11
This is the scenario that makes most sense to me. When it doesn't occur, I feel as though the person owning the discussion is too lazy to to give his original post some quality or too dim witted or does not understand how things work in a "discussion". On a personal level, I feel that this type of opener is more of a poll or a yes orr no situation...what has this poster given me to discuss?
1 person likes this
@secretbear (19472)
• Philippines
21 Dec 11
I agree! I think the poster's opinion is essential for a discussion to start.
1 person likes this
@MsTickle (24752)
• Australia
7 Jan 12
Isn't it great when someone thinks the same way you do? Thanks for BR ...
• Philippines
21 Dec 11
ofcourse there many lotters here like that... they only want is earning not to discuss.. well after i have seen my earning at first time, i was so disappointed but eventually realizing that mylot discussion is interesting why not continuing it and have fun. right??
@secretbear (19472)
• Philippines
21 Dec 11
If you post quality discussions and quality responses, you'll have higher earnings.
@SViswan (12095)
• India
10 Dec 11
Hmmmm...maybe the poster didn't really have an opinion on it or wasn't sure of his/her thoughts on the matter and was probably looking at the responses to have some clarity. I don't mind the poster not mentioning their views or thoughts in the intial post but then I don't like it when they don't respond at all to the responses. If they do respond to the comments, one might get an idea on how they actually feel about the whole thing - if they are sure..not sure...not clear in their thoughts or evolving along with the discussion.
1 person likes this
@secretbear (19472)
• Philippines
21 Dec 11
I guess that's a valid excuse.
@megamatt (14333)
• United States
9 Dec 11
You know, sometimes discussion topics have no background. They are just interesting topics that come to our mind when we are sitting on the toilet at 3:00 AM in the morning for example. Okay, maybe that's just my case, but still there are times where we tend to think and our brains rather go in interesting directions. Granted, I'm sure we can form some sort of opinion give our thoughts. And in the end, many things are not based on personal experiences. Just random weird thoughts we might have at the strangest places. And I do have some rather weird personal experiences that I kind of don't want to completely share on an Internet forum. Most of those topics do not make the Internet, as personal experiences sometimes should remain what it says on the tin, "personal."
1 person likes this
@secretbear (19472)
• Philippines
21 Dec 11
If there's something I wouldn't want to share in the internet, then I won't even start a discussion about it.
@JenInTN (27565)
• United States
9 Dec 11
Sometimes people feel like giving their opinion right away will effect the way others respond. It might even keep people from responding because they are afraid to disagree. I usually post how I am feeling about a certain situation when I start a discussion but I can see why someone might not want to right away. In some situations..and if they really really wanted to hear alot of sides. The sad thing is that there are people that will be harsh if someone answers in a way they don't agree with instead of learning or taking in other opinions. This has made people leery of posting like they would normally do it....maybe that is why the mylotter didn't post their own opinion right away. They wanted people to really say what they thought.
1 person likes this
@secretbear (19472)
• Philippines
21 Dec 11
I guess it's okay if they really wanted people to really say what they think, only if they would only share what they think as a response to that person's comment. This person I'm talking about doesn't always respond to people's comment.
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
8 Dec 11
I have not encountered this but I do think that they should also include their personal opinion. How can you start a discussion without it?
1 person likes this
@secretbear (19472)
• Philippines
9 Dec 11
Some people are doing it, Jill.
@bounce58 (17550)
• Canada
8 Dec 11
I would have thought that it would be better for lotters to pose questions and discussions while drawing up from their own experiences. I think it 'humanizes' whatever situation it is they are trying to explain/explore. Otherwise, it wouldn't be any different from fictional stories. I think.
1 person likes this
@secretbear (19472)
• Philippines
9 Dec 11
I couldn't have said it better myself! That's what I'm saying. If a situation was given, it would be better if the author shared his own experiences in dealing with that kind of situation in his/her discussion itself.
• Philippines
8 Dec 11
HI there, i want to share what i read at the FAQ, (coz i am new here i keep on reading it.) as you said "without having to go through to the comments." i hope i read it right and respond it right.but please note with this http://www.mylot.com/o/faq/faq8.aspx#2 we are required to read all before we comment...just to make sure that what we can say is not as what others are saying... its true that we could encounter a person who don't share opinion instantly, perhaps along the way with the comments they might share.
1 person likes this
@secretbear (19472)
• Philippines
9 Dec 11
Thanks for sharing that. But I think you misunderstood me. Of course we are not allowed to "copy paste" but what I'm saying was if you are writing a discussion and you post a question in it, I think it would be nice if you also write there your own answer.
@kun2349 (23475)
• Singapore
27 Dec 11
There are many of such discussions around and i believe i should be one of them as well.. lol :D Most of the time, i might not share my opinion, experiences in the open, but only in my responses to their comments. It's their freedom to do what they want and we can't stop them from doing so For someone who's not used to sharing, they won't know how to open up and share in a proper way, thus they leave us hanging half way via their post?
1 person likes this
@davaome (1828)
• Philippines
21 Dec 11
I am a newbie here(a month old), and I sometimes don't really give my own opinion on the start of the discussion. I haven't really thought of it that way, I just think that, sometimes, i would want to hear other opinions first before, I share my own views on this. But I guess, it promotes to let other people read the discussions further to have a better understanding of how the discussion has progressed. But I am guilty I am in a hurry and I get lazy at times,
1 person likes this
@drannhh (15002)
• United States
30 Jan 12
I think it is ok either way, secretbear, because the person who starts a discussion can always work the extra information in when commenting back on the replies. That is how I do it anyway. Then I know I will have something different to say to each person who is kind enough to reply. Say don't you think it is about time I started a new discussion of my own? But as you see I am still hundreds of notifications behind in replies to my friends.