So what is your opinion......

@celticeagle (120486)
Boise, Idaho
December 10, 2011 5:43pm CST
The subject is gift giving. Do you think that the true essence of Christmas is finding a certain gift for the person you are giving it to. Or, do you think it is normal to ask for a list of gifts a person wants. I think that in doing the latter we let go of the surprise aspect and we are expecting certain things. I like to have an idea of what the other person would like but not an order put in by them of what they expect. Do you see what I mean? Do you agree? How do you do your present buying? Draw names? Just buy for the kids? Buy for everyone? Lists or free buying?
3 people like this
14 responses
@blue65packer (11835)
• United States
11 Dec 11
I only buy gifts for people who have a list I can go by. That is one way I do it. If I don't have a list I will buy people things I know they want or use. I never buy anything a person will not like! My mom,sometimes,bought things for people they hated! Like for my dad for example! So I learned long again to be aware of other people's likes and dislikes when it comes to gifts. Wether if it is for a birthday ot for Christmas. With my neices and nephews,I give the younger ones money. Like 5 or 10 dollors each which I know goes in their college funds. This is what I do.
@celticeagle (120486)
• Boise, Idaho
13 Dec 11
That's a good way to go. Now days people are so selfish they don't pay attention.
@bunnybon7 (37707)
• Holiday, Florida
11 Dec 11
i usually get them what i know they like but if i dont have any idea i ask someones opinion that spends a lot of time with them. this year, its going to have to be just my youngest 3 grandkids cause im pretty broke. hopeing others understand and get them something later.
3 people like this
@celticeagle (120486)
• Boise, Idaho
13 Dec 11
Sounds very familiar these days.
• United States
11 Dec 11
I buy for everyone in my family. All my avon customers and very close friends. I don't ask what they want I buy what I think they need. This year I did git baskets for everyone.
3 people like this
@celticeagle (120486)
• Boise, Idaho
12 Dec 11
That sounds nice. So how do i get to be your close friend. hehe
@Hatley (164469)
• Garden Grove, California
11 Dec 11
hi celticeagle thats just way too much and is sort of insulting as it takes the element of surprise away from gift giving.one thing to ask for an idea of what a person might like but not a long list at all.this is the celebration of the birth of Christ and gift giving should be from the heart and not from avarice at all. I can only afford to buy gifts for my son, others will have to do with a Christmas card as I am really pressed for money this year.I will never take lists from anyone.if they do not like what I bought them I leaVE store receipts in so they can exchange it.
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@celticeagle (120486)
• Boise, Idaho
11 Dec 11
I think that is a good way to proceed.
1 person likes this
• Kiryat Ata, Israel
11 Dec 11
Like hatley said ,gifts are better be emotional , from the heart. I think there is a basic problem with material gifts : If you buy someone a gift he doesn't need , he won't use it and you will see it. He can also give it as a gift to someone else... asking someone what he needs and buy it to him can be relevant at anytime so he can use it. but he will buy you something you need in the future so why can't you both just go and buy yourself what you need ? That's why I think material gifts are problematic and not relevant. It's like you give your friend an amount of money and he gives it back to you in the future. An emotional present can't be treated like that , if you write some blesses on a blessing card and draw a picture , you are the present of your family and friends. Maybe you can make a nice dinner , boil chestnuts and invite them all to eat... I think this is the spirit of the holiday.
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (120486)
• Boise, Idaho
13 Dec 11
So true, stringer321.
@winterose (39918)
• Canada
11 Dec 11
no one has ever asked me for something, I have often asked friends or family of the person what they think the person would want, or I would get something based on what they would want or go the opposite, I know so and so would never buy this for themselves but it is something they could use and so I buy it.
2 people like this
11 Dec 11
for the past 18 years, our family has been celebrating christmas in my mama's house. you can just imagine the number of presents i have to prepare for each one of my 3 siblings and their families and not to mention my mama's sisters who join in. it's a bit stressful but it's worth it specially when i see the smiles of surprise when each one opens their gifts, coz i make sure that i choose something that they would love but never expect to receive from me :))
@celticeagle (120486)
• Boise, Idaho
13 Dec 11
I try to think along the same lines, Winter.
@MaryLynn321 (2680)
• United States
11 Dec 11
I agree with you, I like to know what a person likes. But, I like to be the one who makes the decision of what to get them. With things as difficult as they are with the economy the only ones we get gifts for is my mother-in-law and our 2 grandchildren. We don't even get gifts for each other as we just can't afford it. I like to put together some homemade goodies if I am able for the adult children and there spouses.
2 people like this
@celticeagle (120486)
• Boise, Idaho
11 Dec 11
We do about the same thing here.
2 people like this
• United States
11 Dec 11
With this economy that is all we can do these days. Have a wonderful day.
@bjc66bjc (6745)
• United States
11 Dec 11
Hi celticeagle, I only purchase gifts for the holiday for my daughter, son, and 2 grandsons...and a couple of my friends. But because my grandson are older now(teenagers) its hard to pick things for them...and my friends, I know them well enough to know their taste and style. So I pretty much can but for them also...I think gift giving should be something you want to give the person providing you know them well enough to know their likes and dislike. Happy Holidays.
2 people like this
@celticeagle (120486)
• Boise, Idaho
11 Dec 11
I definitely agree with that.
1 person likes this
@rusale (648)
• Philippines
11 Dec 11
I think giving gift from your heart is the greatest gift they'll received. Even if that thing is not the gift they want, but that was the gift they was supposed to received. Things come according to its destiny.
2 people like this
@celticeagle (120486)
• Boise, Idaho
13 Dec 11
It does make the gift special. Destiny is and important part of it.
@Lakota12 (42684)
• United States
11 Dec 11
SOme years we just buy for kids my mom and dad got os many in the family with grand kids we drew names now I am jus down to mostly my family BUt I never ask I do the surprize thing if they dont like it I relally dont care as I have gave it to them they can do what ever. This year my one son said cant buy for grandson for he acts like he is to get every thing so I talked son into letting me get a savings bond for him the money grows in 13 years and he will get it then.
2 people like this
@celticeagle (120486)
• Boise, Idaho
11 Dec 11
That is a good idea. My grandparents did that for me.
1 person likes this
@RitterSport (2452)
• Lippstadt, Germany
16 Dec 11
hi dear celticeagle, the thing I do is copy my Christmas List from the last year cause there I see whom I wrote to and who got which gifts. I do that no later than in August so there is plenty of time to find stuff. Its only small gifts here anyways cause I am the main breadwinner and my husband is disabled. His check covers food and insurances and phone connection basically. I have a list where I jot down ideas during the year and check this plus some flyers from book stores etc. Most of our friends are not in this area here so that means it should be something we can send without problems, like books or calendars or sweets etc. I only ask my husband what he wants for Christmas. See he already has tons of computer games, is well stocked with clothes and the like and as he has developed heart problems and needs to lose more weight I cant give his favorite sweet and savory snacks to him any more. So he gets asked what he wants. By the way wishlists are great. I dont see them as negative as you do. He asked me for a few ideas and noted down these small things I mentioned. He knows he should not go and buy everything on that small list cause I dont want him to be broke, but its still a surprise as I dont know what he will be getting me.
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (120486)
• Boise, Idaho
17 Dec 11
I guess it really depends on the intent the Wish List has. Thanks for your response.
@JenInTN (27564)
• United States
13 Dec 11
I buy gifts for the people closest to me. I haven't been able to buy in the past for friends but I have tried to at least get them cards or something little. I ask my kids for a list so that I could choose out of it but there were times when I didn't need it and knew what they wanted. I bought my b/f a surprise gift once and he hated it! I was a musical instrument that was a bit uncommon. It was a Martin backpacker guitar..it looks like a toy I guess but after he had it a couple of months...he told me he had grown to love it..LOL...I promised from his initial reaction that I would never try to buy him something like that on my own again...and I haven't so far. I love the surprise factor of the whole thing really though.
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@celticeagle (120486)
• Boise, Idaho
14 Dec 11
I like the surprise factor too. And if you listen throughout the year and care it shouldn't be that difficult to find something to give them.
@flowerchilde (12547)
• United States
13 Dec 11
For the immediate family, mate, children, grand kids, parents, and for my siblings back home we exchange gifts. We do use lists for one another for kids, grand kids and each other. But for my mother (the only parent we both have left) and my siblings there is no list unless I ask them over the phone what they might want. Even the list for the immediate family is only suggestions, not expectations.. though I do have to admit our oldest grand child does her list as expectations from her mom mostly, with us as back up! Past years we did get specific things our kids asked for. We exchange names with our family here in state, which is my sisters in laws and their children and children's children. We began this a few years ago when it just got too expensive for us all to buy for every one of us.
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@celticeagle (120486)
• Boise, Idaho
14 Dec 11
This is about the only negative aspect to having large families.
• United States
11 Dec 11
It's as simple as paying attention when you are with people. A lot of times in casual conversation things come up if you are listening. They might mention a book, utensil, tool, style of shirt, etc that they've been eyeing or wanting. It's a matter of being observant, and you won't need a list.
@celticeagle (120486)
• Boise, Idaho
13 Dec 11
And people don't do enough of it now days. Paying attention that is.
@pergammano (7755)
• Canada
11 Dec 11
Family...and a specific group of friends (like my neighbor of 32 years) I do buy for...but I do tend to listen, throughout the year..for something that they mention they would like to have! But, I also think that it is person specific...as my Mother-in-law (passed) the dearest sweetest soul in the world, would over-run you with gadgets...I think at one time, I had everything that "starfrit" ever made..spilling out of my cupboards! Finally I had to very gently and diplomatically tell her...I was NOT the testing ground for "Starfrit" and other kitchen gadgetry! Memory as sharp as a tack...when she came to visit, she would ask me how I liked the latest item...LOL! So, I could not "re-gift" them either! As they say, it's the thought that counts! Cheers!
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@celticeagle (120486)
• Boise, Idaho
13 Dec 11
If people just listen, like you said, throughout the year you can figure out what gift to get. It is the thought that counts!