My friend is never happy.

@samd87 (327)
January 13, 2012 4:10pm CST
Do you ever think that some people just don't help themselves to be happy sometimes? I have a really good friend and although we don't see that much of each other anymore we text each other every day. I cant remember not one day where she didn't send me a negative message about how bad her life is... Every single day i get at least one text telling me how bad she has it, I feel like a agony aunt. I know thats what friends are there for but i don't think theres any need to be that negative about things. Surely if your thinking like that every day your never going to be truly happy. It seems too that she always compares her problems to any that i might have, Like if i was to send her a text saying i have a headache she would have a migraine. I would love her just to be happy, she has just moved in with her boyfriend and has a baby on the way, but i think if she only looks at the bad things in life it isn't going to happen anytime soon.
1 person likes this
11 responses
@Lucas818 (377)
14 Jan 12
Hello Samd, How's your friend doing? Are you able to help her? I believe there must be a main reason she's being unhappy all the times... Well, sometimes we do feel unhappy, or upset, but I wondering maybe it's not really a bad thing. I always asking myself, are we necessary to be happy all the times?
@samd87 (327)
14 Jan 12
I don't think there is any helping her, I have tried countless times to make her see how good she has things. She has a very close family who love her very much, not many people have that. I don't believe people should be happy all of the time, this is impossible things do happen in life that get you down, But to be unhappy every single day surely is no good for you.
@lilaclady (28240)
• Australia
13 Jan 12
I think some people do have a negative personality, maybe they don't even realize how they really are, some people just don't appreciate what they have that they should be happy about, and then one day they lose something special and then they realize what they had...
@samd87 (327)
13 Jan 12
Thats exactly what i try to tell her all the time. She has a really close family and she just doesn't realize how lucky she is allot of people don't have what she has but she just cant see it.
17 Jan 12
Maybe she is just kidding with you with her over the top negative personality? You know, like melodrama? If not, remind her to be more optimistic and cheerful.
@GemmaR (8526)
14 Jan 12
Some people are very negative about their lives, because they just don't think that they're having the best life that they possibly can. A lot of us have ideas about our lives that we wish to conform to, however the problem is that most of the time we can't have everything that we want because it's all out of our reach. I used to be a little bit like this, but now I have realised that you really do have to make the most of the things that we have in our lives, because we do only get one chance of living the lives we're given.
@WakeUpKitty (8706)
• Netherlands
14 Jan 12
some people never feel happy, others just complain to complain but don't feel unhappy, also there are people to whom it is a relieve to complain or say what is on their mind but that doesn't mean they feel unhappy. It's also a matter of trust to say what is really keeping you busy, what is on your mind. Most people always pretend they are happy, they wear a mask. It's up to you how to respond on it. You can ignore it, say: I am happy to hear you are doing great or tell you are sick and tired of all the negative texts and it's breaking down the positive energy in you. If you always accept the same behaviour you should not be surprised people keep behaving that way upon you.
@arjunm (439)
• India
14 Jan 12
You just ask him that what is the reason of his quietness, sorrowfulness.why he is so unhappy always you just ask him freely. what is the cause of his depression. i think he will answer to you.
@squallming (1776)
• Malaysia
14 Jan 12
I would say that everyone have different level of problem tolerance. I'm sure that everyone faces problems and challenges in life. Although to different degree but some people would get frustrated and desperate with the smallest problem that rises. On the other hand, I believe that she wants you to acknowledge that she has a bad life or etc that should be pity on. Perhaps you can advise her about it sometimes so that she can actually change her view on life?
@jillhill (37383)
• United States
14 Jan 12
Sometimes I think the like being unhappy....it gives them something to talk about and get attention...personally I find it a real downer and have quit being friends with someone who is so very negative!
@much2say (40452)
• United States
14 Jan 12
I had a friend like that. Keyword: HAD. Everyone called her a martyr . . . it was doom and gloom for her every single day in every conversation we had. "We" meaning all of her friends who also talk about their friendship with her in past tense. She complained about every aspect of her life - no job, no boyfriend, no husband, no kids, she's not sexy, she's not this or that. And what did she expect - she never did anything about it - she only talked about it!! In fact she talked our ears off about it - she'd go on for hours about herself - and in the end it made all her friends drift away. A few of them even went out of their way to help her (like try to get her a job), but she refused - saying it wasn't enough pay or some other woeful excuse. I tried to be a friend and told her in a letter exactly how everyone felt . . . and she took it as a "she hates me" letter . . . and so our friendship ended. That was about 10 years ago - and I hear from a mutual friend that actually still talks to her - that she is still quite miserable.
@parascevi (314)
• Greece
13 Jan 12
Maybe your friend wanted something else from her life and she couldn't achieve that and this expressed with all this negativity? Also sometimes people act like this because they want to draw attention or they just like to behave with this way.
@fannitia (2170)
• Bulgaria
13 Jan 12
I know what you talk about, I have the same friend. She went to live in another country 20 years ago with her husband and kids. I think that this was a good decision and they are doing good. But she is just like your friend, she belittle every single thing in her life. Maybe she can't feel happy any more because in the beginning she went through a lot of stress and she couldn't overcome this. We should try to think positive, make efforts to stay positive even in the worst moments. I wish you good luck!