The revolving door on mom and dad's home

@2004cqui (2823)
United States
January 24, 2012 10:37am CST
All of my children moved out over a year ago. Life was peaceful and we enjoyed the quiet comfort for quite a while. Then the call came from my youngest son. He was about to be a father! (Oh boy) Then came the call for housing! It would be only until they could afford an apartment. (of course) So now they live here. But they would for sure be out by April 1st according to my husband. I made my husband make the decision. They are wonderful people. The only part I can't stand is the loud arguments! They fight every other day. They are young, not even established in the work world other than two low paying, part time jobs. They have a child to be responsible for. Money is tight. I know the first 5 years of my life with my husband were rough and why. I'd like to see them leave but, they are family and they are making a major effort to get out of here. They just left for a doctor's appointment for their son and the atmosphere in this house it totally peaceful. Have you ever been in this position? Do you have any words of advice?
4 responses
@jillhill (37383)
• United States
25 Jan 12
All of them moved back at least once before they got on their own for good. My oldest got into some financial trouble and moved back to get caught up....then signed up for college again.finished her degree...got married and now lives in California...my middle child moved back home between moving from college to Hawaii to meet up with her new husband. That one was rough as we had to have all her furniture in my house too....there was just a path from the living room to the kitchen. My son moved back between girlfriends....for just a couple of months...I don't think any of them will move back again.....hopefully!
@2004cqui (2823)
• United States
25 Jan 12
I'm glad your children actually have goals and work toward them! Stuff happens to people, that can't be helped! All we can do is help them along as best we can!
@deodavid (4150)
• Philippines
25 Jan 12
Hi 2003cqui, How's mylotting today, I hop w can b friends here in mylot. I'm turning 26 this march and i don't have any parenting experience but I guess aside from letting your kid stay with you until April maybe you can have a sit down with the couple and talk on a better way that they can resolve there issues without arguing all the time. Maybe it will be beneficial for them in the future and for your kid it's good that his working hard i hope him well and your future grandson.
@2004cqui (2823)
• United States
25 Jan 12
Thanks for the advice! I wish my son would listen but he goes by the idea that today is a new day, only to start arguing the next day!
@cutepenguin (6457)
• Canada
25 Jan 12
This sounds tough for you! My son is still a toddler, and I am fortunate in that we can afford to live on our own - we have to be very careful with our money, but we have enough. I still rely on my parents and inlaws for help with some things, though, like if I need to move something big or if the car is making a funny sound. We go to our parents' for dinner once a week as well. It'll be easier once your son or your daughter in law get a bit more established in their careers. It's hard to do that, of course, while you have a small child, but even my one cousin that we all thought would never move out of her parents' did manage to do that last year.
@GardenGerty (102534)
• United States
25 Jan 12
The only one that has returned is divorced, and is digging his way out of a financial pit. I still make him pay rent, or rather he offered. I always felt that it was damaging to my kids' self esteem to not at least pay a token of their own expenses. I get frustrated when it is my only day off in a week and the girlfriend is here, because I just recently went back to work. We help them because we love them, though.