Dads home after baby born

By C
@ShyBear88 (18618)
United States
January 26, 2012 2:06pm CST
Do you need your husband or baby daddy to stay home after the baby's born? For how long? When my daughter was born I had my husband go right back to work the next day I didn't need him to stay home with me. My mon came out to help for 2 weeks while I recovered and got some rest but even with her around I did most of the work because I had to do it on my own because at the end of two weeks it was just us two girls while my husband worked. Now pregnant again my husband should be able this time to get maternity level but I only want home for 3 days and not take the while time off I can have mom come back out and help for a little bit especially with a toddler at home.
5 people like this
8 responses
• Lenox, Georgia
26 Jan 12
My husband went back to work 2 days after with our daughter. I got plenty of sleep because even though she didn't sleep through the night she slept all the next day unless she was hungry or needed to be changed so I would nap with her! It was great! I was around plenty of children from babysitting little ones since I was 14 years old so I felt comfortable around infants as well. My parents lived too far away to ask them to help so I knew I had to do it on my own and I did. =)
@ShyBear88 (18618)
• United States
26 Jan 12
My parents live 9 hours away but still my mom came an helped because her mom did the same for her for each of us kids being born. I didn't ask my mom by I did ask her to stay longer because my husband worked fast food so his times changed a lot so sleep was going to be small. I couldn't sleep all of the time my daughter was sleepy she was a baby you couldn't put down.
• Lenox, Georgia
27 Jan 12
My mom wasnt and isnt that nice. Im glad your mom is. I think thats how mothers should be. Thats how I will be when my kiddos get older, Im going to want to be there for them. Oh goodness, I am so grateful my daughter was a pretty easy baby besides her acid reflux.
@ShyBear88 (18618)
• United States
1 Feb 12
My daughter was easy I had practices with my nephew. he was and still is a hand full. My daughter was easy next to that although there was times where I thought I was going to go crazy before my husband lost his old job and got a new one. His new job is much better to where I don't feel that way any more. Its perfect for having a second baby on the way. I'm sure my mom is going to come here again in at the end of summer to help out and it will be welcomed big time with a new born and toddler a little help in the day time will be nice.
@bjc66bjc (6745)
• United States
27 Jan 12
hi ShyBear, I think its great when the dad can stay with his wife after child birth...unfortunately thats just not possible for all fathers to take time off from work...I think the mother always feel like its her job to be there anyway...you know we think we know everything.. ,...LOL....even if this is not your first, we feel the need to be there.. I am not really sure what dad can do except take care of the other little ones...which in its self can be a huge help... But congrats to you and hubby and good luck!!!!
@ShyBear88 (18618)
• United States
1 Feb 12
the question was towards you and what you would be comfortable with. When we had or daughter my husband taking off wasn't and option but he did take one day off and that was it. My mom came and help with our first and with our second as well. But it'll be nice to have my husband more in the night time then when we had our daughter and I was the parent 24 hours a day that can drive a new mom crazy. I handle it well it wasn't my first time with a new baby in the house. I took care of my nephew for the first 3 years of his life and he was a much harder baby and my daughter was nothing compared to him as a new born.
@dodo19 (34295)
• Beaconsfield, Quebec
27 Jan 12
I think that it depends on the parents. Some prefer it, while others don't. My husband and I have a two-month old daughter, and I was lucky enough to have both my husband and a good friends of ours stay with me for quite some time. It was nice to have some help, as there were times when I felt I needed it, as I got used to the whole situation. But this is just me. Not every situation is the same.
@ShyBear88 (18618)
• United States
1 Feb 12
with my family my husband took off one day we couldn't afford him to take off more but I had my mom for 2 weeks to help me out but I did all of the work even though she was around but it was nice for when I need to rest and take a bath or two. Now with my second child on the way my husband might take off 3 days and then have my mom stay for a few days with a toddler in the house I'll need the help with not just one child but with two.
@lilaclady (28238)
• Australia
26 Jan 12
I guess it depends on if the mother needs help and if the father is going to be of any help, I know a father who had a couple of weeks off when his baby was born but he wasn't much help infact to me it was like having two babies to look after for the mum..
@ShyBear88 (18618)
• United States
1 Feb 12
the question was about you and if you need or want the father to help you out. I didn't want my husband help because I knew I had to do it all for the most part. He helped out when home from work but I didn't need him to take time off and for months I told him what I wanted. My mom told right after I got pregnant with my first that she would help out after the baby was born for a week or two and then back home. I had her stay for two weeks. I had a preemie and my daughter need to go to the doctor more often then a full term new born. I'm sure for my second baby now that I might have my husband stay home for 3 days and then have my mom help out for a week or so since I do have a toddler.
@jaiho2009 (39001)
• Philippines
26 Jan 12
Well,it's my hubby's choice to stay after each time I gave birth. One reason is, I gave birth thru ceasarian operation and he wants to take care of me and wants to enjoy the new baby as well. One more reason is, he needs to take to my doctor for follow check ups every week for the first month after giving birth.
@ShyBear88 (18618)
• United States
26 Jan 12
I had a natural birth so my husband went home that morning got some sleep came back the next day back to work. Even if I had a c section I wouldn't let him take off that long since I can always have help from someone in the family.
@dorannmwin (36698)
• United States
31 Jan 12
When both of my kids were born, Tom was only off of work for a couple of days. With Kathryn it was the day that she was born and the two days after she was born, then it was the weekend so he was home for those days as well. With Paul, he was off the day that he was born (a Friday) and the weekend following, then he went back to work on Monday and worked through Thursday. He ended up having to take a few days that week off because my grandmother was in the hospital and passed away. It really wasn't that hard to me to do everything that needed to be done after either of the kids was born.
• United States
27 Jan 12
Hubby gets maternity leave? Fantastic! Everyone who Really knows you is not surprised. You are a strong ,independant woman.
@CRIVAS (1819)
• Canada
27 Jan 12
My husband had a month of holidays saved up so when I had our daughter, he stayed home with me for the first month. It was very good to have help, especially since it was my first child. I also found out that I was pregnant with our second daughter shortly after so, it was nice having a little experience before being alone with both babies at once. I don't know what I would have done without my husband or even my mother for that matter. They were the glue that held everything together for me and I don't know if I could have done it by myself. I honestly can't imagion how single parents do it, I know I could not have. I am glad that you did well with your baby, I think it is a good idea that you are only keeping him home for 3 days or so, he should save his time off for a day when you really need help. Happy mylotting.