your child lied to you

By C
@ShyBear88 (59261)
Sterling, Virginia
February 1, 2012 1:58pm CST
has your little ones or even older kids lied to you about something? How did you deal with it when they did lie to you weather you knew at that moment or later on? Well I haven't had to deal with my child lying yet to me because well she is 1 and the only way she can really lie to me is by crying about something that she wants that she can't have. I guess when my daughter lies to me that is when I'll have to deal with it then. I know some form of punishment will be used for lying to mommy and daddy.
1 person likes this
9 responses
@Hazelrose (2179)
• Philippines
4 Feb 12
As a mom of six,I always teach my children to be honest.I encourage them not to lie at all,I taught them by example and I show to them to tell what ever it is.Either good or bad.So far,didn't know if they lied to me,but as a mom I always talk to them and shows confident on what they do.Open communication is really important.
@Hazelrose (2179)
• Philippines
7 Feb 12
No,I just tried my best to talk to them one by one to know what's the truth.And I always told to them that God will not be happy if they lied.As much as i can I do every thing to make my children doing good for our God's glory.
@ShyBear88 (59261)
• Sterling, Virginia
5 Feb 12
Well being open communication doesn't really stop lying being showing your kids its not okay by examples I don't think work to well as if they actually have done it. As a parent as well I would hope that my child would lie to me but as a mom I have to be realistic that at some point in her life as well as her siblings that yes she will lie to me about something or even her dad about something. Its part of growing up if its not to you it might be to someone else even to there own siblings to keep them from getting in trouble. If I get lied to there will be actions taken for lying what ever the reason is behind them lying to me. A lie is a lie and no lie is ever really a good lie. I would hope all kids are open to there parents. If the parents are open about there mistakes I see it as the children of that home will be open about there mistakes as well and won't keep things from you.
• Philippines
4 Feb 12
I think your the greatest mom ever cheers! :)
@taheraa (1545)
• Giza, Egypt
1 Feb 12
We must be role models for our children, our children's page whiter than white. Our actions around them is that they take from us. Our actions must be as we like our children to be
@ShyBear88 (59261)
• Sterling, Virginia
3 Feb 12
What? The question was has your child lied to you and when they did what did you do?
@taheraa (1545)
• Giza, Egypt
4 Feb 12
So far, my children did not lie on, because I was honest example of them not to lie. I try to teach them and be Their role models.
@taheraa (1545)
• Giza, Egypt
4 Feb 12
By the way if you discover that your child lied to you, Do not punish him and tried to show him your anger and your not satisfaction what he had done. punishment may Increase the problem. Possible to prevent him from what he loves.
@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
8 Feb 12
A Child - Naughtiness could be found in his heart.
Proverbs 22:15 says foolishness is bound in the heart of a child..., so expect a child to lie even at that very young age. How then should we deal with a lying child? I think it is always important to teach the child what is right. It is better to talk to them very seriously. Tell them that lying is not good and that God does not approve lying. Tell them the bad consequences of lying. Let them understand fully well that there is always a punishment for sin. Training up the child the right way will make him a good person and we parents are the one responsible for this important task. We should talk to them and tell them why lying is bad and we should also be good examples to them. We can't tell them not to lie if we ourselves are liars. There is no such thing as white lies. Lies are lies whether it be white or black so we must be very careful.
@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
8 Feb 12
Well it varies from parent to parent. It all depends on you dear but I am here talking through experience. I am already 55 and never did I encounter problem with lying children. I was able to nurture my son and my grandchildren in admonition of the Lord and I would say they are best children ever.
@ShyBear88 (59261)
• Sterling, Virginia
8 Feb 12
Me as a parent I don't think just talking to your child alone weather it was about a lie or something bad they did it still requires a punishment. A lie can have many affects and just a talk to me doesn't teach a child anything besides that it makes you upset when you do so but the after the talk what you do then will change there mind about them doing it again. They are in control of what there mouth does and doesn't say so they have control over weather they lie or not and should think about it twice before doing so. To me saying God doesn't like this or that doesn't do anything.
@stary1 (6612)
• United States
2 Feb 12
ShyBear88..very young children sometimes lie because they are afraid of getting in trouble. I think so much of future behavior will be shapped by how lies are treated. If the lie is small, a firm but gentle, understanding conversation can clear the air and help the child feel safe in telling the truth in the future.
@taheraa (1545)
• Giza, Egypt
4 Feb 12
Lie a lie and we must deal with by the mind and not harsh and severe punishment. Try Being a close friend for your child, Give him a reward for his good creation and Seeing the anger and dissatisfaction if lie.
@ShyBear88 (59261)
• Sterling, Virginia
5 Feb 12
Because a parent punishes there child taheraa it doesn't mean they are angry yes disappointment in is correct and child should now that its wrong no matter what. You don't just let a child get way with every little thing and talk to them about it how else will they know its wrong with out a punishment. Rewards are only good for good behavior or when something is done will not when a child has done something bad or wrong.
@ShyBear88 (59261)
• Sterling, Virginia
3 Feb 12
The question was about when your kids lied and how you deal with it and not how parents should? To me the age doesn't matter a lie is a lie and it has to be taught no matter the reason why behind the lie its not right to do at all because you get in more trouble and then a child learns that lying is okay when it not okay cause you can't live with a life of lies cause it'll get you in the end. When my child lies I will deal with it in my own way like I said above there will be punishment no matter if they lied for a good reason or not its not an acceptable behavior that I'm going to allow.
• Malaysia
2 Feb 12
My dear Shybear I am speaking with authority! I am both a father and grand father of age 68 years old. I am in favor of not 'sparing the rod and spoiling the child' I always advocate this with my daughter and grand daughter. But the punishment must merits the degree of lies or mischief. However to enforce judgement, it must be done a few seconds or a few minutes after the commission of the bad act. Do not punish at the spur of the moment. Uncontrolled anger is the worst emotion emotion to feel when punishing a child. That's my take so far! Would love to continue this via your returned mail at this site. OK? Thanks! Love: Bro. Joe. GBU
@stary1 (6612)
• United States
5 Feb 12
josephngsiewfatt Your comment I am in favor of not 'sparing the rod and spoiling the child' is shared by quite a few people. I just don't know how harmful spanking is...seems to me it sets an example and then when children are angry they feel it's ok to hit others...Fortunately a look or raised voice was enough with my kids as I am still conflicted about hitting a child...
@ShyBear88 (59261)
• Sterling, Virginia
6 Feb 12
I agree with you stary1 there is a lot of bad that can come from spanking a child. Some parents never see the bad side to it. I always say you teach your kids not to hit people and then we hit our kids because they did something wrong its kind of ironic. Because you say one thing and then do the other. I feel it gives a child a right to yes hit people when they have done something they don't like or think is wrong. But also other parents can't say that a parent can't do it besides disagree with them.
@ShyBear88 (59261)
• Sterling, Virginia
3 Feb 12
Like I said above if my child lies to me there will be punishment when I find out what it was they where lying about. If its years later nothing I can do about it years later. I will make it clean I'm unhappy they lied to me and didn't tell me the truth because if they told me the truth then they probably wouldn't have been in as much trouble if they where punished back then or someone else wouldn't have been punished in the processes and if someone else got hurt because of there lie they own that person a sorry for there misbehavior. I don't wouldn't punish my child out of anger that is just stupid. A punishment is for a bad action that they did and if lying was part of it then its going to be a little bit harsher depending on the age and what it was.
• Philippines
2 Feb 12
I don't have a child and I was once a spoiled kid I enjoy my life but lately I realize that later in life I will become a parent and I don't want to have spoiled kids that ask for everything, so in my own point of view the right punishment for her is simply taking everything away from her, or have an agreement that she could only make you buy some toys or whatever she wants once a month, 5 times a year, it's up to you, and by this agreement it wouldn't be to hard for you to cut your expenses PS if she cries for something and she's a child I don't really think she's lying about wanting it. and please don't spoil your child I don't want the next generation of children to be what I was before
@ShyBear88 (59261)
• Sterling, Virginia
3 Feb 12
I wasn't asking you how to raise my daughter. One she is 1 years old and all babies cry for things so do 1 years old and crying is a form of lying. You will find out that when your a parent babies lie about wanting things some times. I'm not going to punishment my 1 year old for lying to me because she doesn't understand what a lie is yet and what the affects of a lie is. When she is 5 years old yes then is when punishments for lying will come in. Small children that can't saying what they want cry for things that is what toddlers do they don't know how to say the word to where you understand I want this or that. I don't spoil my daughter neither does her bad. We do buy her things but not when she wants them but when we think its okay for her to this or that. You can't fight with a 1 year old over things cause all your going to get is a tantrum and you'll look like a fool for fighting with a 1 year old. You have lots to learn about being a parent so save the parenting advise for when you have your own kids.
@ShyBear88 (59261)
• Sterling, Virginia
5 Feb 12
Well she is 1 years old she doesn't know how to talk and most all parents know that babies lie by crying. No not all of the time when she cries she is lying its knowing the cries when your a parent of your own children you know after the first few months of there life what cries mean what. When she has done something wrong and gets punished for it she will cry, when I say no to something she will cry, when I take something away she'll cry, when she gets hurt she'll cry. Its a normal thing for young toddlers to do. I know that because I've been around children all of my life and taken care of tones of children since I was 9 years old. When your a parent you will know how a child is acting and for what reason they are acting that way its all about physiology when you have a young. All children form birth till adult hood knows how to lie its just about how the parents deal with it. Some say to talk it out with there kids and I say that doesn't work certain actions have to be done in the right way for the right age to make it known its not okay. Yeah my daughter is 1 year old and is as of right now till her baby brother or sister is born at the being of next winter she is an only child but I know more then a lot of people do about children and how to care and raise them.
• Philippines
4 Feb 12
I'm sorry I thought that the 1 that you wrote at the top was she's the only child. but still I don't think that she's lying by crying I mean when you lie do you cry? of course a child is a child he/she will cry for asking something it's just up to you if you want to give it to her or not, I know that I'm not a parent but in a child's point of view I want this or I want that I think you know what I mean.
@babyEj (1522)
• Philippines
2 Feb 12
My son just turn 4 years old. He isn't god in lying. He talks everything and anything to me which sometimes makes me irritated. He gets angry if he notices that I am not listening at all. If he talked about something I should look at him and listen. Lying simple things might be a light issue but we shouldn't take it for granted. As parents we need to talk to our children and tell what is wrong about what he did. Punishing should be the least option. Open communication is really needed.
@ShyBear88 (59261)
• Sterling, Virginia
3 Feb 12
That is a lot of little kids they are taught your not listen if your not looking and its true its a bit disrespectful when someone isn't looking at you when they are talking to you about something cause your really not listing and they could be saying something every important. If my children lie its and issue no matter what. Its not a good thing and that means I can't trust them if they can't tell me the truth. It will be a punishable behavior its like hitting one lie and there is no consequences to it means that its okay to do again. Talking is one thing but that doesn't stop bad behavior form happening when you say don't do this its not a good thing. I would tell me child first and then punish them for it.
• Philippines
3 Feb 12
As a mom, I do know if my child is lying. Yes, he lied to me and I do know what's his reason all about. I asked my son, "Hey, where did you get those scar?", He wouldn't gave me an answer. I do know that someone hurt him, but still he wouldn't. My son do have his own reason why he had to lie.
• Philippines
4 Feb 12
I'm sorry, but then that's still a lie.
@ShyBear88 (59261)
• Sterling, Virginia
3 Feb 12
That's not that kid of lies I'm talking about lies so they don't get in trouble for doing something they did. Lying because they got hurt could be because of lots of reason. That's not the kind of lies I was talking about that should be punished. If my daughter lied to me she would be punished for it no matter what the reason is. If someone is hurting her and she didn't tell me that's not something I would punish her for but I would still make it clear that you don't lie to people about things that you tell them truth so that they can help you and fixes it.
@Heixyin (175)
• Malaysia
2 Feb 12
Well, if my kids lie, I would scold them, and ask them why did they lie. From then , I would take a appropriate measures. But I'll tell them not to lie anymore of course. Though I know they might still lie in the future. But then, if I know why they lie, it would be easier to handle in the future. Oh well, kids. I mean I was a kid once. And I lied to my parents too. Often maybe.xD and I personally understand the feeling of lying. Somehow, I think I would reconsider it. It's a part of life though. Although,I would not like it if my kids lie. But again, it's my turn to feel the feeling of being lied by my own kiss xD oh well, that's life.
@ShyBear88 (59261)
• Sterling, Virginia
3 Feb 12
I think all kids lie about something at least once in there life. Yeah the action need to be know its not a good thing. I wouldn't yell at my child but they would know that I don't like them lying to me or anyone. Lying would cause more punishment if they didn't tell me the truth the truth will get them a little bit less punishment with me and maybe there dad. There is many reason to why a kid lies to there parents or lies to anyone.