Why does she want me to kiss another girl?

Brazil
February 7, 2012 2:24pm CST
I have a girlfriend. I recentley got a part in an independent short film. No cash pay. There was a scene where there had to be a kiss between me and the girl. She was a very cute girl but I did not want to kiss her out of pride for my girlfriend. The producer asked me to talk about it with my girlfriend and if she said no, there was no problem, they could do something else instead. The next day, I lied to him. I told him I had talked to her and she said no. I hadn't talked to her. I did not want to kiss the other girl. Another day,going out with my gf, I shower her the script, told her there was a kissing scene but the producer took it out for his own reasons and she asked why he did that and told me she would have wanted to see me kiss her! For me, when we don't get something, we project those desires on someone else. She wnats me to kiss another girl, why is that? I would hate to see her kiss another guy in any situation!
2 people like this
10 responses
@Bluedoll (17071)
• Canada
7 Feb 12
You should ask her maybe and explain your view specially with the last part. I would think she is looking at this differently than you are but this can only be confirmed by her. The scene is something you are working at not playing with and the kiss is not real life. Maybe she trusts you and wants you to know this or maybe she sees this as something that will not take you away from her. Maybe she would feel guilty if she stood in your way of advancing your career or any other reason that would make you happy or relieve your stress about your job. On the other hand it could be something kinky but you would need to explore that gently with her so she would open up to you. She may have different ideas than you do. My hunch is that is not it but she just cares about you but you don't have to get back here with the details for that can be just between you and her.
2 people like this
• Philippines
8 Feb 12
I totally agree with Bluedoll here. I think all you need to do is the ask. Good communication is the strongest foundation of any relationship after all. Maybe she was just trying to be a cool girlfriend and repressing her jealously? It might be also that, but SHE is the only one who can give you the answer. So ask her quickly and directly. In fact, right after you read this. ;)
• Brazil
8 Feb 12
Very nice, sometimes we just need someone to tell us the right words. Maybe that is what she feels and she just expressed it a little enthusiasticley, she even joked with me that I would never be able to become an actor if I didn't want to kiss any other girls, thanks!
@mauve02 (133)
• Philippines
8 Feb 12
maybe your girlfriend knows that it is just work. it doesn't mean that she doesn't love you but maybe for her kissing in a scene is just needed to make the scene looks real that many people may relate. She is very open minded and trust you very much. She knows that the kiss is just work related and nothing personal. :)
@aerous (13474)
• Philippines
8 Feb 12
That's really a strange things for a guy like us, my friend. I think your girl friend love to see you kiss another girl and see how she feels if you kiss someone else. Or maybe she want you to kiss another girl to show that it's only a kind of work you do and not consider it serious because you only acting in that particular scene...but still I am strange with your girl friend action into that particular scenery...
2 people like this
• United States
8 Feb 12
Your reasons and feelings are honorable. But you got a part in a film. The script outlines your job. Most directors aren't so lenient or willing to change the writers word. If every star in movies refused to touch, kiss or hold another man or woman there wouldn't be many movies made. It is not that you went out and found another girl to kiss, this is just part of your job as an actor in this film. You got lucky this time because the director is willing to change the scene for you. That might not be the case next time...one little kiss could be the difference in doing a small independent part in a short film or becoming a movie star in a major production. One kiss or millions, the future decisions might have to be re-thought if this is the line of work you plan on pursuing. Good luck!
• United States
8 Feb 12
You were right on your part. You deserve applauds. As for your girlfriend, I suppose she is very secure with you and thought that you kissing another girl in a scene would be nothing more than an act for a movie. She saw no harm in it. In her mind, she does not think that just a kiss would make you fall for the other girl. But I get your point about how you would not want to see your girl kiss another guy. I would think exactly like that about my boyfriend. But I guess your girlfriend is just a little too open minded.
2 people like this
@LeonLeki (22)
• Macedonia
8 Feb 12
I don't know why she want to do it, maybe she tests you. Anyway if it's not paid you shouldn't kiss her, you can make your girlfriend jealous or something.
1 person likes this
• Brazil
8 Feb 12
My thoughts exactley, it is not a paid job! So I prefer not to kiss anybody but my girl, thank you very much ;D
@KrauseHome (35026)
• United States
9 Feb 12
Wow!! That would be a hard one, especially if the other person was good looking, and you see so many times in movies or TV shows, or hear that there have been times after something like this, something happens and it leads on to something else, and next thing you know they are filing for a divorce, and dating the person they were recently in the movie with. Personally I think you did the Best thing for you, and should not let it bother you what she would have wanted.
1 person likes this
@jagjit273 (1740)
• India
7 Feb 12
Wow what a lucky man you are, having such broad minded girl , but on the other hand l really appreciate your faithfulness towards her. May she understand your love and never cheat you.
1 person likes this
@prinzcy (5060)
• Malaysia
10 Feb 12
I don't know your girlfriend's point of view on this but she's absolutely open minded. I don't like my man touch other woman, let alone kissing but she seems okay with the whole thing. If it's bother you too much, just talk to her about it. She might have something to say regarding this.
@parascevi (314)
• Greece
8 Feb 12
You should ask her that.Maybe she was curious and wanted to see you as an actor kissing the girl because usually actors do not kiss in real each other..If i am correct in that.