Please help............?

@laxmi123 (949)
India
February 13, 2012 9:58am CST
i am 22 years old.i have a wonderful sister of same age.she is not my own sister but its not an issue,i love her so much. i cant tell how much i love her.I treasure her close to my heart.evn she loves me. but around 8 months back she said i am very playful & i am not serious in planning my career and started keeping mum since then.she is not talking to me for this 8 long months.she said she will talk only when i change.so i have taken measurable actions and i have changed a lot.but no positive sign from her.i have tried in all possible ways but she is not all opening her mouth.Impossible for me to live without her.i am helpless now.please tell me what should i do to get back my sweet sister.i am ready to do anything for her.please help me.
2 people like this
9 responses
@hannah75 (30)
• United States
13 Feb 12
This is difficult to answer only because it may be difficult for you to accept. But laxmi, if someone truly loves you, they love you as you are and will not ask you to change just to keep you in their life. If you have made the changes she has requested and still wants nothing to do with you, stand up for yourself. Tell her you love her, but that she needs to take a long look in the mirror and think about what loving someone means. Good luck sweetie:))
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
15 Feb 12
Hi laxmi.. I think, actually she want you more successful in your life.Why don't you convince her that you already changed much better now. Even though she doesn't want to talk with you,i think it s not wrong if you try start talk with her first.Prove yourself to her..
@yanzalong (8947)
• Indonesia
14 Feb 12
First of all, you'd better ask her what is exactly wrong with you. You have to know it precisely. If that doesn't work, you tell her you are sorry and ask for her forgiveness. I think she will give in to you.
@sid556 (31018)
• United States
14 Feb 12
Hi Laxmi, I hate to say it but it sounds like a one-sided friendship. A real friend would not give you such ultimatums but would accept you as you are. If I were you, I'd move on with my life and start hanging out with other people. I would turn this right around on her. If she doesn't like you for who you are then YOU don't want anything to do with HER. If you get serious with your career then it should be for you and not in hope of getting this "friend" to talk to you. Let her worry about losing you for a while. If she doesn't then you have to face it...she may not be as good a friedn as you thought.
@yspmyl (3438)
• Malaysia
14 Feb 12
Hi laxmi123, If she really mean it, I think the only way you can bring her back is to proof to her that you have changed, show to her what had changed and I think she must be love you so much that she can keep herself from talking to you for a long 8 months. If you really have changed and become better, you should talk to her and tell her about your improvement. I think she will be happy to see and will talk to you if you really have changed and improved. Good luck and you are very lucky to have such a caring and nice sister!
@keihimekawa (2010)
• Philippines
14 Feb 12
Personally, I think not talking to someone just because of career outlook is really shallow. Instead of not talking to you, shouldn't she just help you out in moving forward instead of keeping mum on things? If I were you, I'd do two things: (1) I'd be less emotional. It's a good thing that you love your sister a lot but don't be too clingy. If she doesn't have any issues not talking with you, then you should just move on with your life. I don't mean ignoring her. Go on and talk with her. If she replied, then it's good. If not, let her be. Just go on talking to her. At least you are reaching out to her. (2) I'd try to be more mature. I started working at age 21 but I'm still a bit childish. I did grew more mature and all that but there's still this side in me that I refuse to let go and that's my child-like side. Not the "childish" per se that you annoy people or not plan your future. What I'm trying to say here is as you go along the career path, learn to act like an adult. People vary and you need to be flexible enough to adapt to them. And this includes being INDEPENDENT and CONFIDENT. Be more sure of yourself and don't worry too much on what other people will think or do. As for your sister, let her be. Just go on with your life and learn to live by yourself without thinking TOO MUCH of her. With the way you created your discussion, it seems like you are too dependent on your sister to the point that you said "Impossible to live without her" which I find is not a good sign. That's the best thing you can do as of now. Good luck!
• United States
13 Feb 12
I would leave her right where she is and move on with my life. you should not have to change for her to be in your life. either she loves you as you are or she leaves you where you are.
@mselin (77)
• India
13 Feb 12
Hi laxmi It is time for you to be more realistic and less emotional. You should start working on your career rather than worrying about other things. As you have said she is worried that you may not get a good career, so strive for it and she will realize that you have changed for good.
@sjvg1976 (14713)
• Delhi, India
13 Feb 12
Hello Laxmi, May she want to see you successful in life? Hope she will come to talk to you once she will come to know that you have changed.But whats the reason why she want you to have some carreer?is she elder than you?But still anyhow she has forced you to think and plan for your carreer which i feel is good thing and you are doing is more better.